After lunch, Galina had some hours to her own, while Lilith now had the task to give a lesson. So the Accepted went to her room, sat down on the bed and started practicing the weaves for the Testing. They seemed so menial after having had control over so much more of the Power. But still they had to be done, if she wanted to be Aes Sedai. Actually it was no use, just repeating the weaves. The practice was most effective if someone else helped you with distractions. But the other Accepted stayed away from her, since her return to the Tower. Lilith was the only one who dared to speak with her. At least more words than the bare necessities.
It was like they knew of her conflict, that she no longer fully walked in the light.
But was reaching for power, abandoning the light? Asmodeos had said, that the aspect of Shadow, that the Black Path encompassed, was the same as the Shadow that had dreaded to end her world. But was it?
The Black Dragon‘s major aspect was the End. But not an infinite ending, but one that also allowed regrowth and creation. So unlike the Dark One, the Black Dragon did not exist outside the Pattern or the cycle, how the people of the Dragonlands called it. Shadow at least the aspect of it seemed more like a tool to attain power, like deciet and secrecy were, enlightenment too in a way.
The pursuit of Power did not make her a bad person or a darkfriend. It was neither bad nor good. What you did with that Power, was what determined how you were perceived.
She could follow the path of the Black Dragon without abandoning the light, or at least without straying into the ranks of the Shadow. She just had to find a way to skirt the rules.
Becoming an Aes Sedai would burden her with the Oaths, something that would hold her back in a major way. But attaining the shawl held it’s own powers and freedoms, resources more than useful. And she finally had the opportunity to return to Potentia a place she longed for ever since she had left it.
Galina finished the last weave, she hadn’t really paid attention, but still managed to complete every single one. Maybe it was time to claim what was hers. She got up and straightened her banded skirts. The light willing, she wouldn’t wear them for a long time after what she was about to do.
Calmly she checked herself in the bubbled glass of the mirror, before leaving her quarters. Determined she left the Accepted‘s wing with her goal in mind, the way before her. Only the price was not clear yet.
On her way to her destination, she remembered something Amsodeos had said in the circle. „Elements are willful beings. Do you really think, they like to be commanded?“ The same applied to Aes Sedai. So she laid out her words carefully. Cammanding would not do, begging wouldn’t either. But maybe a firm demand, conveyed in a civil manner could have the desired effect. That realization woke the urge to touch her forehead once more. But she withstood this time.
She wove her way around Novices in the halls on her way down to the Misstresses‘ study. Erelle would not be pleased to hear what she had to say. But she wasn’t either, when she had asked her to go to the Dragonlands and still she had been allowed to leave. The Mistress of Novices might be a Gray, but logic seemed to impress her as much as a White.
Her cool determination, granted her the ability to remain utterly calme, she already felt like an Aes Sedai, as she glided through the white halls, despite wearing the dress of an Accepted. Finally she reached the door made of dark wood, a door dreaded by almost every girl in the Tower. It was a symbol, a harbinger of the punishment that awaited her here, every time she misstepped. Galina had been here more often than she could count, at least in her time as a Novice. Once or twice she had been spanked then. The last time was so long ago, before all that with Tulius and her father had happened. She had been called back to the Tower, since the last Mistress had gotten reports of her misbehaving, prompting a stay in the Tower, including mortification of the flesh. Only a few days after her return to Sutch, the message about her father had arrived and everything had gone south. She suppressed the memories of it and set her mind back on the task at hand. It would never happen again. That was why, the thing she was about to do, had to work.
Galina knocked. Silence. She withstood the urge to fidget nervously, in fact she took all her nervousness and stuffed it in a box in the back of her mind, whilst imagining herself being a flower opening to the sun.
Again she knocked in a firm but still polite manner. Finally she could make out Erelle Sedais voice from inside the study. „Come In, child!“ she said, a tinge of irritation in her voice, only audible to those dealing with Aes Sedai for some time.
Galina opened the wooden door and entered the small room, head held high. It had no windows and the walls were of dark wood like the door. A big mirror hung on the wall, for the delinquents to watch themselves being chastised. Light willing she would not do the same in the near future.
Erelle was an older sister, her hair already turning grey at the temples, putting her between approximately 200 and 250 years in age. She would never know for certain, age being a delicate matter among Aes Sedai. Her otherwise dark blonde hair was in a bun on the back of her head, no strand of it, out of place. She wore round glasses, sea-folk work. And through them, her steelgrey eyes measured her with an air of displeasure at the interruption.
She was not alone, Galina had noticed instantly. A woman with reddish blonde hair sat on the other chair, clad in a white algode blouse and dark brown skirts, her neck was decked out in jewelry and a brown scarf hung around her shoulders. Unlike Erelles smooth features, her face was marked by fine lines. An Aiel Wise One.
She watched her enter curiously, her eyes resting on the face a moment longer, the eyepatch.
Before Erelle could say a word, the Aiel woman spoke: „I did not know, you sent the apprentices into battle too, Erelle Mosalin!“
The Mistress blinked and remained silent for an instant. When she spoke the irritation had increased „No we do not, Galina here is a... special case.“
The Wise One raised an eyebrow, now watching her with intrigue. „I will listen to that story with great interest, Accepted Galina.“ Erelle shook her head. „Not now Kaline. I am sure the child has something she wishes to discuss with me. Were you sent here?“ the Aes Sedai‘s hands went to a quill and the book of punishment but the Accepted quickly shook her head. „No, I am here of my own volition, Erelle Sedai!“ she courtseyed. „And I ask your forgiveness for interrupting your conversation! If you wish, I will gladly wait outside for it to finish.“
The Mistress‘s eyes went to her guest, who only shrugged, still watching Galina with great interest.
„Well it is already interrupted and it was me who asked you in. So what is it, that you wish to speak about? Your reports about the Dragonlands?“ - „No! They are already in the hands of Antonia Sedai. But it is the same direction.“ She suppressed the urge to shift on the spot, while calmly making her demand: „As you well may know, I belong to the very few, who can say, to have seen the worlds beyond the portal stones. And I know First Hand, what dangers they hold, for everyone! Dangers that need to be assessed, so the Tower can prepare, for the case, that these dangers find their way to our world. And who else but, me would be suited better for such an endeavor?“ Erelle looked like she wanted to throw in something, but Galina kept on, voice firm but calme. „I am in the unique position, of having gained some measure of trust by some of the most powerful mages beyond the Stones. And to keep me in the Tower, robs us of valuable time, to prepare all the means necessary to avert catastrophy. Even more, the venture beyond the stones, can give us valuable resources, to counter other threats, from within our world. That is why, I now formally ask of you, to let me take the test for the shawl as soon as possible!“
Galinas last words seemed to hang in the air, as the room turned eerily silent. Erelle watched her for almost a minute, disbelieve, peeking through her Aes Sedai serenity. That demand was nothing she heard everyday, as it was custom, that a girl was tested when the Mistress saw fit, not the other way around. Kaline in the other hand, watched her with a spark of fiendish pleasure in her eyes.
The Accepted just stood there, serene and collected, like expected of an Aes Sedai, shoulders straight and head held with confidence, but not smugness.
„Has she been among the tents?“ the voice of the Wise One broke the silence with a chuckle. The cairhienin shook her head gracefully. „No, I was trained by the atha‘an miere for a time, before gaining a position in a academy beyond the Stones.“
Erelle still seemed to be at a loss for words. Just watched her, face now thoughtful. Kaline shrugged. „I could have sworn to see a spark of Amys in you.“
A gentle smile flashed across Galinas lips. Being compared to her, was an honor.
Finally Erelle spoke. Her voice was collected, she did not seem phased anymore by what the Accepted has asked of her. „You are aware child, that it is custom for the Mistress of Novices to decide, when a woman is tested for the shawl. But do you know, why this custom is in place?“
The woman had not expected her to just say yes and questions along those lines had seemed very likely, so she was prepared. „Because the Mistress of Novices watches the Accepted very closely and has insight into their development and abilities.“ Erelle nodded satisfied at her words and seemed like she wanted to point out, that this was the exact reason, why an Accepted did not make such demands. But Galina kept going. „But isn’t it the woman in question, the one who has the greatest insight into her own advancement? Or at least she should, if she is really ready to become Aes Sedai. I am fully aware of my abilities, my strengths and my challenges. I know my goal, I know the way and the price that needs to be paid. Let me prove myself in the Testing! And if I fail, I will claim responsibility in front of the Tower, in front of the whole world of you wish and then quietly take my leave!“
The Wise One had listened, face thoughtful. Now barely recognizable, she seemed to nod, and Galina recognized a sense of approval on her face.
Erelle‘s face on the other hand, had turned to a cool mask, violently keeping back any trace of emotion.
Maybe she had gone to far. Nervousness crept up once more and she had to stifle the urge to swallow.
„You have made your point, child. I will consider your words.“ her voice showed next to no clue on how she would decide. Galina felt a strong sense of reluctance, but she could have imagined it aswell.
With that she was dismissed.
Out in the hall, she had to pull herself together, not to lean against the wall, around the next corner. Instead she crossed her arms behind her back and glided back to her quarters.
She made her way back to the Accepted‘s wing and her room, where Lilith waited. The other Accepted sat on the bed, muttering over a book. Galina closed the door quickly a and sank against it, needing all her strength to not slump down.
„There you are! I‘ve been waiting for... Galina? Are you okay?“
The Cairhienin had bowed her head, and her hand once more rested on her forehead. Shadow, to cloak her from the eyes of her enemies.
She shook off the stupor and with a sudden laugh she looked up to her friend.
„I must be mad Lilith! I just outright demanded of Erelle to test me!“
