A/N: Okay, so i started this forever ago and i kinda wanna contiue this as a bestfriend thing? idk, let me know if you like it??
T/W: none
Word count: 1021
The afternoon was dragging on, and the class seemed to be never-ending. Long hours of math that you did not need as an English major. This was not how going to university was supposed to be. While the friends you had made seemed nice enough, something was off. Most likely you thought it was the dorm. Because you lived alone, and the room had a cold vibe to it. You were not surprised though. Your dorm was placed in the fucking basement. And fine, others had dorms in the basement, but yours was beside the toilet and washing room. A bright idea popped into your head. You were most likely late, and all the good places were taken, but you would give it a shot. You were going to get an apartment.
The class came to an end, that left you without any further understanding of math, but oh well.
You got your umbrella out and started the walk back to your dreaded dorm. The rain was pouring down as you listened to the music currently in your ears. The bass was not all that heavy, and the lyrics were sad, so maybe you were a little stereotypical and pretended to be in a music video in the pouring rain. Soon you caught sight of the message board that stood in the courtyard. Every piece of paper that hung there was covered in plastic, except one. In messy handwriting was an address not far from campus along with a name and a number. "In need a roommate asap" had been scrawled underneath. Quickly you typed the number into your phone, pressed call and put in the earplugs with the handsfree. It rung one time, two times, three and you expected him to not answer. The fourth ring never came though.
"This is Michael?"
A rough voice answered, he sounded like this was the last thing he needed, but you answered anyway.
"Um, hi, this is Y/N, I'm calling about the room you're renting out?"
You almost smacked yourself right there, nobody wants timid people.
"Oh yeah, sorry I can meet you there in like thirty minutes? I got out of class right now"
"Yeah, sounds great"
He then proceeded to hang up without saying goodbye.
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Your shoes soaked through as you walked to the address. Wearing sneakers had been a seriously bad idea in the middle of autumn. As you stopped in front of the door, you realized that the apartment looked quite nice. The door was a clean white with a tiny window, and even though there was no doormat it looked actually looked welcoming.
“Holy shit, did you walk here?”
His voice was different than on the phone, he was not as grumpy, but you suspected it had something to do with the surprise of not coming in a car.
“Here, let’s get inside, before you catch a cold and blame it on me.”
Michael all but grumbled to himself.
“Dude, if i get sick there is no one else to blame but me.”
With a questioning look in his eyes, a small smile creeped onto his lips while he was opening the door. As it opened, a small dog came barreling through the door.
“Hey, Southy!”
Michael bent down to pet the small canine. You could swear that the grumpy man on the phone had completely disappeared. Not to mention how his black clothes contrasted his soft smile. He watched Southy sniff your leg, with such adoration that it had your heart melting. Trying to seem unaffected, you carefully bent down and put your hand out slightly for the dog to sniff. Always making sure that you stayed calm. Southy came forward and sniffed carefully, and then started nudging your hand for pets.
“Huh, I’ve never seen him that calm with strangers.”
A small smile made its way onto your lips.
“We used to have rescue dogs back home, so i kinda like to always be cautious of meeting new dogs.”
You looked up at him and saw a small bit of adoration in them, before he quickly hid it.
“Well anyways, this is my apartement.”
The both of you walked in and he kicked off his shoes. You went to do the same, but stopped short mid motion.
“I don’t wanna leave your place a mess with my wet socks.”
Michael stood contemplating for a short secind, before he held up a finger signaling for you to wait. Southy following him closely as he walked into an unknown room to the right.Probably his bedroom. A few seconds later he came back with a pair of black ankle socks.
“Thank you, so much.”
“Nah, don’t mention it.”
The inside however held a doormat, so you stepped on it and quickly changed.
“The place isn’t too big, but it does hold the essentials, like washing machine and dryer. There is no dishwasher, but that usually works out alright.”
He led you through the house as he pointed to the kitchen, it was small, but held the essentials.
“I don’t mind doing dishes really.”
Michael nodded and his right hand went up to his bottom lip, pulling slightly on it, before he headed to the hallway, an open door which led into the room you had seen him disappear into before. Inside was, from what you could see, a desk setup with an impressive gaming pc, and other things needed. Like a messy bed, with a dog on it.
“The room that would be yours is this one bsides mine, and the bathroom is opposite it.”
He opened the door to the room, which was clean and bright. The bathroom was slightly more messier, but still seemed alright to you, with a shower and dryer stacked on top of the washer.
“I’ll take it, if that’s alright with you?”
Again with the timid voice, it would have to do. Seeing his smile made everything a little easier, and when he confirmed and said he would get the papers to sign, a little sigh of relief washed over you. This place truly felt like a home already.
This wasn’t the first time this has happened, getting a phone call late at night from your wasted best friend Michael, asking if you could pick him up from the bar because he was too drunk to drive home. You didn’t really mind because he could barely drive sober let alone drunk and he also made you stop at McDonald’s and would buy you anything you wanted.
But tonight when you picked him he was more than wasted, he could barely walk and just kept laughing. When he got into your he turned to you put his hand on your face and he said “hey my beautiful angel friend”
You gave him a weird look and he just laughed like someone said the funniest joke ever. You were half way to his house when he said “you know who I hate”
“Who,” you asked, thinking he was gonna say his parents or his bitch ex-girlfriend.
“Matt,” he said then rolling his eyes. Matt was this guy you were on and off with, currently, you guys weren’t together but knowing him he will be begging for you back in like a week.
“Why do you hate him?” you asked, confused as to why he was thinking of Matt.
“Because he has hurt one of greatest people I have ever met,” he said, not saying anything for the rest of the ride to his house.
You helped him into the house and to his bed being quite because if his mom found out he went out and got drunk he would be dead. You put him on his bed and hugged him good night but before you could exit his room you heard him say “please stay with me”
“Why,” you asked him
“because I need a cuddle,” he said picking up his blanket so you could get in. You hopped into his bed and snuggled into his warm body, he smelt like strong alcohol and typical male cologne.
“this is nice,” he said squeezing you, “yeah” you replied laughing at his behavior.
“I could get used to this,” he said with a serious voice. “me too,” you said, thinking about how much better Michael was then Matt.
Summary: You knew love, and you knew Luke, Michael, Ashton and Calum.
A/N: This is my favorite piece so far! It has been on a long road but now it’s here and I’m actually really proud of it. It’s a bit different, but I hope you’ll give a chance! Also, I really like the Michael part, but it contains mentions of alcohol, drugs etc. so if you’re not comfortable with reading about that, you can just scroll past his part x
You knew love, although your version was a bit different than your friends’. They would fall in love over and over again and their feelings never lasted long. They got drunk on love and swelled in self-pity, when the hangover hit them, while you saw love as something precious, something rare and something that made life worth living. You had experienced love four times, with four very different boys; their only thing in common was a strangely passionate fondness of music. And the love you shared with each of them had taught you about yourself, truth, sadness, anger, hate, love and life itself.
Your first love taught you that soft, blushing cheeks, nervous whispers and sweaty palms were way better than bad boy images, expensive cars and heartbreak. Luke taught you how to fall in love without getting broken, he taught you how to trust and how to not just be lovers, but also best friends.
Luke Hemmings was the shy boy next door, the boy you had known all your life without really knowing him, and until your 14th birthday you hadn’t actually talked besides muttered hello’s, when you met while taking out the trash. However, that changed completely when you turned 14; after he, under strict orders from his mother, of course (who recently had found out about both of you being some kind of outsiders in school) came over to your house with a home baked chocolate muffin with a cute little candle in the middle. Your small trash-can-meetings evolved into a close friendship where you told each other everything and did everything together. And in-between hesitantly touches and late night sleep overs, the friendship the two of you had built became something more than that.
For you, Luke meant taking it slow and the feeling of giggles exploding in your body. He was your first love, your first kiss, your first everything, and you were his first, too. He was gentle, he was sweet and he was caring, and when you were with him, it felt like being wrapped up in a blanket made from pure love and admiration. You were his sun, his moon, his biggest support, and the person he depended most on in the whole world.
But like all good things, your relationship had to end. Losing Luke was red, swollen eyes for weeks, it was promising to stay in touch after you went to college, it was even more heart break when you realized that long distance relationship were harder than you ever thought possible, and it was trying to hold loud sobs in, while on the phone agreeing that your relationship had reached the last stop on its road.
Luke loved you, but he wasn’t yours to keep.
Your second love taught you how to live life to the fullest with Green Day blasting through the speakers and a home rolled cigarette between your fingers. He taught you how to get lost in a pair of green eyes and find yourself again while searching for him in the darkest streets of Sydney. He taught you that there could be a completely different person hiding underneath dark colored hair, a cheeky grin and eyes blurred by smoke. Michael taught you about the depths of the human soul, and in exchange, you gave his life a purpose besides colorful pills, cheap liquor and marijuana.
Michael Clifford was everything your parents warned you about and the complete opposite of your first boyfriend. You had never met someone like him but somehow, you understood him. You understood his screams at 3 A.M when he had those nightmares, he never wanted to explain to you, because he didn’t want to frighten you. You understood him, when his restlessness became too much and he had to get away for a while. And you were with him, through the bad dreams and in the passenger seat of his old Ford, when you drove out of town to the beat of an old 80’s song.
Michael was far from perfect, but perhaps that was what made him so damn beautiful. And to you, he really was beautiful. Some people weren’t able to see his beauty; they just saw a boy with a dangerous smile, tattoos and numerous piercings. But Michael was so much more than that: he was the craziness you had kept hidden inside of you way too long, he was letting go of what held you back, he was deeply felt chords on a retro guitar and he was the poetry that came from your fingertips.
You loved him, you really did, and he loved you too. But you began to wonder how much a broken heart could love. In between broken promises and screaming at each other at the top of your longs, you realized that Michael wasn’t meant for love, and while looking for him in the corners of the city you never thought you would find yourself in, you figured that your relationship was doomed from the start. However, that didn’t mean that you wouldn’t do it again. Because while Michael was addicted to narcotics, you were addicted to the sound of his voice while he sang the songs he had written about you, the twinkle of madness in his eyes when he was making one of his legendary plans, the smell of his cologne when he planted love bites down your neck and his strong arms around you when he needed to feel your presence after a nightmare.
You couldn’t save Michael, but you had a feeling that someday, someone would.
Your third love taught you about finding art and beauty in even the smallest things in life. He taught you how to always look on the bright side, to be kind to everyone you met and to never give up. He taught you how to heal your wounds in the right tempo, and to be proud of your scars and the stories they told. He taught you that if you could learn to love yourself, then your eyes would shine brighter than Leonid Aframov’s Farewell to anger, your smile be softer than Monet’s water lilies and your beauty be even more complex than a Van Gogh painting.
Ashton Irwin was every girl’s dream; he was the most handsome human being that had ever walked on earth with his hazel eyes, golden skin and curly hair in just the right way length. He was sweeter than candy without ever being too much, had the voice of an angel, were probably better to draw than any of your art teachers and while being incredibly cute, he also had that little bit of edge, that made all the girls at your college go crazy. He was the kind of boy, girls like you could only dream of, but it didn’t take long before his love for you were deeper than you ever could have imagined. When you met Ashton, it had been a long time since you had been taken care of, since you had been able to let go, to cry in a safe place, but suddenly he came into your life and helped your broken heart heal. He never tried to hide his love for you, or his intention of making you love him back, but he let you heal your wounds in your own tempo and didn’t put any pressure on you. And while falling in love with him, you learned to love yourself, too.
You were Ashton’s muse and watching your face take form on the paper or hearing some of your words sung by his beautiful voice felt like finding pieces of yourself you didn’t even know existed. And he was a part of you, too; a previously unknown part of you that radiated with happiness. And if someone asked you to describe Ashton, you would tell them that he was the type of guy who would fight a dragon for not only the princess, but for anyone who needed it, that there always was space in his heart for the ones that didn’t fit in anywhere else and that it was clear to everyone who met him, that he was an angel sent down to earth to mend the broken ones. And you would tell them, that he really did mend you; that he saved you.
He had mended you, he had kissed your scars, he had loved your soul and he had put a smile on your face whenever he was near you, but the big grins turned into small, sad ones and the little kisses ended up as a your lips pressed together in a desperate, longing goodbye-kiss. Your “I-love-you”s became “I’ll never forget you”s and “There won’t be a day, where I won’t miss you”s and suddenly, you had to learn how to live without the golden boy, who survived from the pleasure of creating instead of oxygen.
Ashton was art, but art lives forever, and you were just a simple mortal.
Your fourth love taught you about inner warmth, absolute calmness and that love is better when it’s not all about fireworks and butterflies, but instead about the soothing feeling of coming home when you’re tired after a long day of work and collapsing in your lovers arms. He taught you how to love with both eyes open; knowing and looking forward to what would come. Calum taught you how to trust that he would catch you every time you fell, and through thick and thin, bad times and good times, he kept his promise.
Calum was the sun; he was the warmth spreading throughout your whole body when he said those three words that always made your heart flutter and he was the secure feeling that surrounded you along with his strong arms on nights where you were scared and just wanted to give up everything. Calum was the first man who told you that you were “it” for him; that he wanted to settle down with you someday and that he wasn’t scared of what the future would bring, as long as he had you by his side. And he really made you believe in a life with curly haired children running around in a small, idyllic garden, a cute golden retriever like the ones your grandparents once had and small declarations of love when coming home from work; he made you believe that the life you always had wanted, finally were within reach.
The love you shared with Calum Hood was comfortable silence, it was warm kisses while standing under falling snowflakes, it was low humming while cooking the other’s favorite food and it was falling asleep in each other’s tight embraces. Loving Calum was as unselfish as it was beautiful and simple; he was hard not love, really, and for the first time in your life, you realized that your happiness depended more on him than the fulfilling of your own needs; if he wasn’t happy, you couldn’t be either.
With that realization followed another; you would never be able to give Calum what he deserved. He deserved the world, and no matter how hard you loved him, you would never be capable of giving him that; you were too broken, too damaged; your scars were too big and too many. So you had shot his sleeping figure one last glance before closing the door on your biggest love and the future he offered you, although you didn’t deserve it. And though he couldn’t hear you in his dreaming state, you gave him one last promise while breaking others: ”I’ll always be right here, standing in the back, where I can’t be seen, and cheering for you.”
Calum deserved the best, and if that meant you letting him go, then that was how it had to be.
You knew love, and you definitely knew the four men playing on the big stage, who had no chance of noticing you in the enormous crowd.
Perhaps it was faith that the only people you had ever loved, ended up as best friends, or maybe it was simply just a crazy coincidence. But no matter what, it gave you peace; they were happy, they were living out their biggest dream and you couldn’t be prouder. If anyone deserved it, it was them. They had broken your heart, and you had broken theirs, and although you felt a small flash of pain when considering if they had forgotten you after all these years, you were so grateful that they clearly had gotten over you, even if it meant that they no longer smiled at the mention of your name or saw your face for their inner eyes every night before falling asleep. The first time you saw their faces on a billboard, you couldn’t believe your own eyes. And after that they just kept popping up; perhaps because you only watched the TV channels that you knew showed their latest commercial or because you kept driving past the big screen that showed their faces, even though it meant being a little late for work.
“I will always love you all,” you whispered into the night, and even though it was impossible with all the screams in the huge arena, you couldn’t help but think that maybe they heard you. And perhaps they really did, judging by the small, calm nods and big smiles they sent out to the crowd a few seconds after your proclamation. And perhaps you were crazy, or perhaps some things just happen although they’re anything but logical, but you could have sworn that you heard them all whispering your words back when they went for a short break behind the scene.
Luke, Michael, Ashton and Calum would always be a part of you, but you were finally ready for another adventure.
