#mildly cursed

[wolf-tail]

Part of the Bowser-fucking fantasy (at least for me, idk about the rest of ya'll) is getting Jr. as a stepson. I'm spoiling the fuck out of him. Come on little man, we're going to gamestop, pick out whatever you want.

[ultimateaclrecovery]

This is starting to be minor disaster summer. At least they have all been minor but my goodness there is so much and they all require so much sorting. My finger wound is mostly healed but still needs attention and I still have to deal with all the health care billing and I paid urgent care more than my claim says I was supposed to have so I will have to call to try and sort that out. And of course buying a whole ass car from getting rear ended. And I can’t find my title so I also get to request a new title. And I just got all my stuff from my car and it’s sad to that’s dead. I had for ten years and now it feels like the end of the era.

And for extra fun I got a fraudulent charge on my credit card this morning so now I need a new card and it was the one with all my auto pay bills so a pain in the ass to switch them all. And I just want things to maybe stop happening so much.

But at least all of my disasters are minor and ultimately are solvable problems that will be resolved in the near term. And as much as I am feeling stressed and overwhelmed I do actually have the resources and ability to deal with and resolve my problems, and I am really, really lucky that that is the case. I’m still going to whine tho.

I was going to try and end this on a positive note with things that have been going well and that I’m grateful for but I think that’s another post because I really just need to whine a little more. I still have all of captaining stuff to do and so much finance stuff there. And I really need to do the dishes and there are still boxes everywhere and I desperately need to tidy but it feels impossible when there’s just so many things and boxes everywhere and there’s no longer a set place for anything. And one of my contacts keeps going fuzzy. I also need to schedule an eye appointment and a dentist appointment but imma have to punt on those a bit because if I add one more thing to my to do list I will scream. And I am traveling again this weekend.

I need a nap. And a break. But instead I will do twelve things a day everyday for th foreseeable future until things either stop going wrong or I just stop doing things.

[kaythegayest]

Cursed images.

[agoodpretender]

Deeply threatening aura…

[s0ull3ss-p3rs0n]

@jayninjago you know the post.

[kissoflightning]

Amanda is so done with Connor

Lmao this looks so silly!

@iwonderwh0 @rk1k @8-rae-rae-8

[yokohamapound]

OKAY OKAY s/o asking Chuuya and Dazai (separately) if they want a bite out of a banana and then end up shoving it down their throat🙏 PLS

I don't know how you guys come up with this stuff, but I love it so much. 😂

Characters: Dazai Osamu, Nakahara Chuuya

Contents: gn!reader, surprise oral, I guess?, little bit nsfw

Dazai Osamu

Dazai is one of those guys that tends to want something because you have it. If you order different things at a restaurant, he wants to try some of yours too, and will sulk if he's not allowed to. (Or scheme to distract you and swipe some like the thief he is.)

He also has a bad habit of leaning over and just taking a bite out of whatever you're eating. This can be very annoying, especially because that big mouth of his can translate to big bites.

"Seriously, half my croissant in one bite? You fucking..."

-spraying crumbs- "Yoo wuff it."

"I do not love it."

There you are, sitting next to him on a sunny day, peeling a perfect, ripe banana. You feel him shift next to you, and you just know he's going in for the drive-by chomp.

You're ready.

He leans in, mouth opening to snatch the first bite of banana. But before his teeth can close down on that soft banana-y goodness, your hand jerks up and it's like he's deep-throating Big Bird.

But.

This is Dazai.

He moans, and takes it deeper.

You're frozen in shock, and mounting embarrassment, as he sloooowly pulls back, lips wrapped around the banana in a way that can only be called slutty, and lets it pop free of his mouth.

"Bella, what made you think I have a gag reflex?"

Nakahara Chuuya

Chuuya's pretty generous with what's on his plate. If you asked him for the last bite of steak, he would (grumpily) give it to you, if you're his s/o.

He used to live by street-rat rules, where you don't take someone else's shit, although he's since grown out of it.

He might occasionally steal a few bits of popcorn or some chips if you're snacking near him, but he's nowhere near as bad as some people he could name.

He loves it when you offer him food, though. Cooking for him flips his simp switch. Which is what makes it kinda mean when you pull the gag on him.

He brightens when you offer him a bite of banana, leaning over to get some. Only to have it plunging toward the back of his throat.

Chuuya retches, yanking your hand away from his face.

"The hell was that for?" he asks, red-faced, spitting. "You tryin' to make a point? I don't do that to you!"

"Aww, I was just messing with you..."

"You damn brat."

"Here, I've got a video of someone doing it to Dazai."

"...show me."

[flowerandthesongstress]