In Hidden Egg au, Xiaotian had been a fussy baby. Macaque would often be woken at random intervals at night by a crying baby monkey and Xiaotian would only fall back to sleep after a bedtime story and/or Macaque singing the lullaby that Wukong used to sing to back when he was still carrying the Xiaotian. Sometimes bith and cuddles.
oh yes ;_;
Xiaotian was... not an easy baby.
He missed his Mama. He didn't understand why Wukong wasn't here with him. His ears hurt. He just wants to be held. Why is everything so dark?
Raising a child with the mother incarcerated is hard enough; but combine that with their kingdom being burnt by True Fire
Macaque is a proud guy. Throughout the day, he's okay with letting the Stalwarts babysit or feed the baby - but Nighttime? Thats His responsibility. He won't accept any help whenever Xiaotian woke during the night, no matter how many times a friend or subject offered. The shadow monkey is a protective papa.
Wukong and Macaque know many lullabies from their years of tending to the cubs of the island - but he saves one for Xiaotian alone. One that he's only heard Wukong sing to his growing stomach.
Macaque isn't sure where the song originated, or if Wukong composed it himself; but it almost always worked to calm Xiaotian down whenever he missed his Mama or had a nightmare.
Times when Xiaotian had a "bad night" (i.e really bad nightmare, his hearing acted up, sickness etc...), Macaque would perform little shadow plays to tell his Little Heaven all about his godly Mama, and how he nearly brought down all of Heaven to ensure Xiaotian would be safe and sound. Xiaotian loves these stories, even as an older monkey.
This is based on a hc I made that Little Mk will just hide inside Macaques scarf/cape, and ya know since Mk can shrink he'd probably shrink sometimes to better match the height of how old he's feeling.
A Momcaque oneshot. Also posted on A03 under the same name :D
The Six-Eared Macaque was known for a lot of things; being able to hear past, present and future, having knowledge of all things, and being able to manipulate shadows to bend to his will. Teleportation, shadow clones, and even his warform was made out of shadows taking on a form that gave many literal nightmares about who and what they were seeing and experiencing. Though, there were also a lot of things about Macaque that people didn’t know.
For starters a lot of people didn’t know that Macaque’s fur was once a white coloring that he learned to cover with a glamour at a young age in order to help him fit in better with his troupe. People didn’t know that he knew how to speak and understand all spoken languages but could only read or write a handful of them. Those who didn’t know him when he was younger would have no idea that when he was younger he was quite shy and that he only started to become more flowy, bright, and dramatic as a way to keep him busy after his and Wukongs… ‘break-up’ for lack of a better term. The secret that Macaque kept closest to his chest though was how much being alone hurt.
Monkeys - especially Macaques - were very social creatures. He was no different, but due to his appearance he often was kept out of most Troupe activities. Nobody wanted to groom with him, or play, mates… well nobody was ever truly interested in him. The elderly monkeys would tolerate him for short spans of time, the monkeys his age would shun or bully him, and the infants loved him… until their parents saw that they were with him and then their fun would have to come to an end.
Things got better when he met Sun Wukong and his Troupe though. With their King to introduce him to them there was immediately a closer bond between him and the Troupe. Though, that didn’t mean they didn’t tease him for how messy his fur was, how clumsy he was at grooming, and how nervous he acted. The mothers and infants helped the most with these ‘quirks’ he had, often being patient and kind to the outsider. They taught him how to groom himself, how to get close to others, and even how to properly play with infants.
As weird as it was to say, he was more comfortable with the mother monkeys than he was with most of the others.
He lost all of that when Wukong killed him.
The comfort of family, the closeness of a Troupe, the feeling of home was all ripped away from him. Each day that passed brought with it more rage. When he was finally freed from his prison he began to plan revenge against Sun Wukong and his ‘successor’. After all, what right did Sun Wukong have to be that close to somebody when he ruined every chance he had?
At least… that was the plan.
Macaque’s number-one goal was still the same it had been since he was killed. Get revenge.
But after the fight with the Lady Bone Demon that became a bit more complicated. Sure, it had already been uncomfortably close when he spent all that time training MK in order to steal his powers. Then when he put on his Shadow Play scheme he had again gotten closer to Wukongs successor but managed to pull back that connection when he saw just how alike MK was to Wukong. The most dangerous of the ‘connections’ was by far the fight against the Lady Bone Demon. Working side by side with not only MK but Wukong for the first time? That was dangerous. He had almost let himself get caught up in the kids' speech and Wukong’s willingness to trust him.
It was comfortable awful.
He couldn’t get swept up in those emotions, in the willingness to trust and get close to others. Especially when one of those ‘others’ were responsible for most of the pain Macaque had suffered in his recent past. So, again he took off. He ran away and hid at the dojo within Megapolis.
Whenever MK or any of his ‘squad’ came to visit he would make himself scarce but otherwise his routine had gotten uncomfortably comfortable.
Wake up, train, practice cooking (often leading in failure), occasionally singing just to pass time, and scheming. Though… lately his ‘scheme’ board had gotten less and less important to him. Not because his revenge was any less important to him, but because Macaque found himself much too tired to care as much as he had before.
Everything felt… gray and cold. A familiar feeling he hadn’t experienced for centuries, a feeling that had been slowly growing over time now felt absolutely crushing. It was like that feeling of cold loneliness that gripped at his heart when he was a child multiplied a thousand times over. He was exhausted yet he couldn’t sleep. He felt bored and sad yet he couldn’t get himself to do anything.
It was too much.
‘That’s it!’ He thought with a growl as he forced himself to sit up. ‘This… this is too much. If I stay here in this dark dojo I’m going to go crazy. It’s time to come up with something to do… even if it’s just to get out of here for a while, I need to do something.’ He thought, then smirked. ‘Oh… hold on, I know exactly what I want to do.’
Macaque had no intention of hurting the kid, but he was bored and looking for entertainment, so he was going to mess with him. Though, just glancing at the kid made it obvious to Macaque that he wasn’t all that well either. He looked tired, jumpy, and just as out of it as Macaque felt most of the time. Macaque didn’t get why MK looked so broken up, especially when he had such a ‘great’ connection with his friends. He had friends, a family, he had Wukong. So what could make MK so miserable?!
Didn’t MK know that he literally had everything that Wukong had taken from him? Why wasn’t that enough for him?!
Suddenly, whatever ‘scheme’ that Macaque had put together for that day went out of the window as exhaustion and anger overtook him. He waited until MK had made his delivery and was on his way back to the vehicle he drove, then he attacked.
Letting out a shout Macaque launched himself out of the shadows slamming into MK. MK cried out in surprise, the two tumbling and crashing to the ground as they rolled into an alleyway. MK swung a fist at Macaque who caught it with one fist before the other took a fist full of MK’s hair, snarling in his face.
“M-Macaque?!” MK said in surprise, reaching up and grabbing the hand that was tangled in his hair while trying to pull his fist away from Macaque. “What are you doing?! Let me go!”
“I don’t get it!” Macaque snarled, “Why did he pick you?! Why does he let you live when he killed me?! Why did he take my happiness and why do you just brush past the fact that you have exactly what I wanted!” Macaque said, slamming MK’s head down on the ground, causing the teen to cry out in pain.
“What are you talking about?!” MK said, yanking Macaque’s hand out of his hair, ripping out a small chunk of brown locks before MK sat up, headbutting Macaque.
Macaque yanked away from MK, loosening his grip on MK’s hand which allowed MK the chance to swing his fist again and crack Macaque across the jaw, knocking him the rest of the way off of MK. Macaque jumped up to his feet as MK scrambled to his, getting that familiar gold and red staff out from his ear as he formed it and growled.
“I thought we were done with this stuff, Macaque! We don’t have to be enemies, we can be-”
“What?! Friends!? You really think I can be friends with you?! With any of you?! The last time I had a ‘friend’ he beat me to death! You really think I’ll be able to have a second chance now?! Now that you’re in the picture?” Macaque formed his own staff as he swung it at MK’s head.
MK blocked the staff, being knocked back ever so slightly as he slid down the alley a few inches. “Yes! I won’t let anybody hurt you, Macaque!
Macaque growled, “Even if the one who hurt me the most was your precious Master?” He snarled, pushing down harder on MK who’s arms began to tremble under the weight. “What about the day when Wukong decides that he’s had enough of me again, huh? What will you do when that day comes and you have to pick between me and Wukong?!”
“It wont come to that!” MK said desperately, his right leg falling out from under him as he dropped to his knee, still holding Macaque back desperately. “You don’t have to be alone anymore, Macaque! We don’t have to be scared!”
Macaque didn’t have time to process MK’s words as he brought up his staff and got ready to hit MK with it again, but just before the staff hit him, MK made a noise that startled both of them.
He flinched, closing his eyes tightly as he chirped loudly.
That one sound said so many things all at one time that it physically overwhelmed Macaque as his staff vanished right before it could hit the kid. That sound… It was so much. It was like it took Macaque by the heart and squeezed it until he felt like it was going to break.
‘Hurt. Scared. Danger. HELP!’ That one noise said all of those things all in a single moment.
But MK wasn’t an infant monkey, so why did he know how to make that noise? Why did that noise set his natural instincts on fire with a flare of guilt and protectiveness? Macaque didn’t understand - he couldn’t understand. He couldn’t understand how MK knew how to make the noise, how he could make it so easily, and he couldn’t understand why it made Macaque tear up.
Macaque hiccuped, his hands shaking violently as he suddenly got onto his own knees and pulled MK into a hug. The touch of another living creature felt unfamiliar and foreign to him, but that didn’t stop him from holding onto MK. MK seemed just as confused, letting out a soft noise as he just sat there for a moment. Shakily MK’s hands reached up to the back of Macaque’s shirt, rubbing a circle on his shoulder.
Tears dripped down Macaque’s cheeks as he squeezed MK, rocking him as he instinctively chattered at the teen as he chattered in a desperate attempt to comfort the teen. Macaque’s chest felt tight, like he was in physical pain as he pulled MK closer, putting his head on MK’s shoulder.
“Don’t cry… I’m sorry. Don’t cry…” Macaque said softly.
“But… you’re… the one crying?” MK questioned, partially muffled by Macaque’s scarf. “What’s wrong? What happened?”
“I’m sorry.”
“I’m confused.” MK whispered back, then yelped as Macaque suddenly picked him up. “Ack! W-what are you doing?!”
Macaque couldn’t think of anything to say. What could he say to make up for what he’d done that day? So instead he just said as simply as he could, “I’m kidnapping you.”
“WHAT?!” MK squeaked, shrinking his staff as he slipped it in his ear again. “What do you mean?! Why? Let go!” He said, gently hitting Macaque’s shoulder.
“Shut up.” Macaque said, confusion fogging his mind as he dropped through a shadow, causing MK to chirp again.
‘Scared! Scared!’
“Shit… shh, I’m sorry. I’m sorry. It’s okay. I’m not going to hurt you.” Macaque said, putting his ears down as he rubbed MK’s back again.
MK let out an uncomfortable noise as Macaque put him down in the center of the floor in the dojo.
“Stay.” He said tightly, then went over to a closet on the far side, opening it up and looked inside.
MK watched as Macaque began to yank out the few spare blankets and pillows he had, occasionally sniffing them to make sure they weren’t too musty and dusty from being stored. Meanwhile, MK stared at Macaque like he had grown a second head (or maybe another set of ears). Confusion swirled in the room, heavy on both ends.
Everything about this was so… weird.
Macaque glanced back at MK who seemed equally scared and confused as Macaque felt. But, Macaque didn’t let him dwell on it too much before he grabbed a pillow with his tail and threw it into MK’s face. MK let out a startled shout as he pulled the pillow from his face, studying it as though he expected it to attack him again. But it was out of Macaque’s reach, so the soft purple pillow wouldn’t be seeking out any more violence.
A second red pillow though held no such promise as he repeated the process with it and hit MK once again.
Little by little the pillows grew around MK, surrounding him in a pile before Macaque went to the blankets. MK let out an almost relieved sigh when he ran out of pillows, but then let out an offended noise when Macaque tossed a blanket over him, then immediately a second blanket.
“Two?!” MK said, sticking his head out of the pile. “That’s enough slices, Macaque!”
Macaque didn’t understand what that meant, but he also didn’t understand half of what he was feeling in that moment. So he threw a third and fourth blanket over MK. MK again stuck his head out, his hair standing up due to static but before he could complain again he touched the top blanket with big eyes.
“Soft.” He said, then looked at the tag. “Wait… is this new?”
“Most of ‘em are.” He grumbled, closing the closet and turning to MK who was now rubbing his face in the soft pink blanket with cheetah-ish spots on it. Macaque felt some tension leaving his body at this, a small smile tugging at his lips as he watched the teenager get more comfortable.
‘What is wrong with me?’ Macaque thought, rubbing the back of his neck as he approached the pile. “Okay, MK. Let’s make a nest.”
“A… what? A nest? With what? For what? Do you have a pet bird?”
Macaque looked at him, dumbfounded on two fronts. First of all, how had Wukong not taught him about nests? (Did Wukong know about the chirping? If he didn’t that might explain why he hadn’t taught him about nests). Second of all, why did Macaque suddenly decide that he needed to teach MK about nests? He wasn’t his teacher, his friend, or even the pig-guy who seemed to have called dibs on the kid long before even Wukong had.
So why was this his job?
Why did he doubt anybody else could teach him this?
“A monkey nest, bud. Here we start with one of these big blankets.” He grabbed MK out of the pile of blankets, putting him back down as he grabbed one of the bigger blankets, though it wasn’t the largest of them. “We start by laying this out and tucking in the corners.”
“Um… okay?” MK grabbed two of the corners helping Macaque laying it down before they tucked in the four corners making it a large circle-ish shape. “Like that?”
“Yep. Now we surround the edges with pillows.”
MK nodded, grabbing a pillow looking at it for a moment before throwing it at Macaque’s face.
Macaque let out a sputtered noise, pulling the pillow away from his face as he looked at MK who let out a soft chuckle then grabbed another pillow, bringing it over as they began to surround the edges of the blanket with pillows. The longer he and MK worked together to make this nest the more comfortable the two fell.
“There we go, now we put the biggest blanket over the entire thing and tuck it in on the edges.” Macaque explained, the two continuing to work together. “Now the remaining blankets and pillows go in the center of the nest for us to use and stuff.”
With just a few final touches MK looked at it then smiled. “Ooh! It looks so soft!”
Macaque chuckled lowly, “Take off your shoes and give it a try, bud.”
“Really?”
“Yeah. We didn’t make it just to look at it, y’know.”
MK smiled, taking off his shoes and putting them near the door before jogging back and climbing into the nest. He then let out a soft noise as he stretched, grabbing and hugging onto a pillow as he hummed. “This feels… good? But weird good.”
Macaque nodded, discarding his own shoes rather boredly before he stepped into the nest and sat down with MK who tensed slightly. “Monkey’s make these to help take care of their young. Demon monkeys are a bit different because we have other reasons for making nests but typically it’s all for tending to their young, physical health and mental health.”
“Really?”
“Yeah. We especially need to nest when we’re young or it could take a big toll on us… so I’m surprised that Wukong hasn’t taught you about it.”
MK fell quietly for a moment, looking down at the pillow he’d been snuggling since he climbed in. “Wukong… has gotten better since all the… everything.” He said, gesturing vaguely with his hand. “But it’s clear he still doesn’t know what to do. I think he’s been lonely… I don’t know how long he’s been feeling this way but he’s sad. He’s sad… kind of like you’re sad.”
Macaque looked away, “I’m not sad, bud.”
“You are though. Your eyes are… they’re sad.”
Macaque sighed, “Listen, cub.” He said, “What’s going on with Wukong and I - personal and otherwise - doesn’t involve you. Okay? Wukong and I will figure out our own shit on our own time. You just… worry about whatever is going on with you.”
MK pulled the pillow to his chest. “I’m… I’m okay. Just having nightmares makes it hard to sleep.”
“Yeah.. I get that.” He said with a sad sigh. “Nesting should help… in theory. It helps if you have people to share it with but nesting alone can sometimes help too.”
Macaque gently reached over petting the back of MK’s hair, then frowned when MK fliched and chirped again.
‘Hurts! Ow!’
Macaque’s eyes widened when he remembered what he’d done. He’d slammed MK’s head against the ground. He’d hurt him! He had hurt his cub! Anxiety dug at his chest as he pulled MK into his lap quickly, causing the teen to let out a confused sound. Macaque then wrapped his tail around MK’s middle to hold him still as he gently began to move his hair to look at the scalp below it.
Here was a small wound, a very small one, no bigger than a grain of rice but it was enough to make Macaque’s eyes burn again. He let out a shaky breath, fixing his hair again.
“Sorry…” He said, cleaning some dirt out of MK’s hair. “I… I just wanted to mess with you, but I lost my temper. I didn’t mean to hurt you. I don’t… I don’t want to hurt you, cub.”
MK glanced at him, his eyes full of confusion and sadness. “Why do you keep calling me that..?”
“Calling you what?” Macaque asked, sniffling as he choked back his tears.
“‘Cub’?”
Macaque’s eyes widened. “I… I didn’t.”
MK nodded, “Yes you did. Twice. I thought I misheard you the first time but you just said it again. Why?”
“I… I don’t know cu… Bud. Probably just slipped.”
“What does it mean?”
Macaque sighed, loosening his grip on MK as he turned to face him, tilting his head confused. “It’s - well - uh…”
MK chuckled and Macaque again smiled hearing the noise of happiness from his cub.
Wait. His cub?! If anything MK was Wukongs cub, and he had no claim to him! Not to mention baby monkeys were called infants so calling him cub didn’t make any sense but… how he was feeling did feel right. It didn’t matter if it didn’t make sense to his head, for the first time in centuries Macaque’s heart felt truly happy.
Macaque pulled MK into a hug, letting MK lean with his head on Macaque’s chest. MK no longer sounded confused, scared or even concerned and instead just relaxed into the hold. “Cub is the name for some types of baby animals. Though some demons call their own children ‘cubs’.”
“So… why do you keep calling me ‘cub’?”
Macaque hesitated once more. “Honestly? No idea. But until I figure it out, you’re stuck with me. You’re mine now, cub.”
All of the arguments that MK might have made were cut off by a tired yawn and a soft stretch.
“At least let me call Pigsy… he’ll be pissed when I don’t show back up at work…” He said, his eyes slipping shut.
Macaque grumbled, reaching back and pulling MK’s phone out of his jacket pocket. “Password?”
“Monkey Cop.”
“Get a shorter password.” Macaque grumbled, but typed it in and clicked on the contact with the pigs face on it. He then debated on what to do. Calling MK’s boss would lead to less confusion and panic… probably. But he was still determined to have fun so he just sent a picture of MK now sleeping against his chest, though he did make sure that his own red scarf was within the picture so that the pig knew who took the picture.
Then without any context he just sent the picture and a short text saying; MK is mine now. He won’t be coming back tonight >:D
The responding flurry of texts, swears, and phone calls from everybody in his contacts went ignored due to Macaque turning the phone on silent and discarding it to the side. They’d find him eventually he was sure, but for now at least MK could get some genuine sleep.
Macaque rubbed circles on MK’s back, his chin on MK’s hair as he looked up at the ceiling.
Macaque felt… strange. He didn’t know how to explain it or even attempt to put it into words.
It had been so long since he had held someone, laughed with them, or genuinely smiled in the presence of another living person. When was the last time he had felt so light? So full of life? So… content with his current position and situation? He couldn’t remember - it was all too distant - all just a memory of warmth, comfort and love.
That was it. That was the feeling.
The feeling so warm and foreign in his chest, a light airy feeling that he hadn’t felt since the days of ripe peaches and sunshine. It’s revitalizing and almost addicting, leaving Macaque with a yearning that he hadn’t become aware that he had even lost.
A yearning for life.
He understood what it was like to die, and what it felt like to want to live, but this was different. This yearning came without the heavy - almost haunting - thoughts of spiteful revenge or rage. It was like he no longer wanted to track down the one responsible for his pain, suffering and agony. Like that no longer mattered to him anymore.
The loss of that was almost overwhelming, but the new realizations that came with it was enough to keep him grounded.
He didn’t just want to survive anymore, he wanted to live. To live and enjoy living. He wanted to smile and laugh instead of brood and drag his feet through the muck of the day.
He had lived, he had died, he had been revived, but until that moment - while he was laying in a nest with his cub on his chest - he realized he had never felt truly alive.
I have to stay up to take care of a sick pupper whose fighting cancer, so I’m just going to uh…..
Lurk for more momaque content.
i wish the pupper the best of luck, poor thing.
LMAAAOOOO MOONDROP THIS IS MOMCAQUE CENTRAL FOR A REASON UUUUH OKAY OKAY HOW ABOUT......A CHAPTER 6 SNEAK PEAK :D
“I take care of myself now can you let me explain-ack” Nezha yelped once again “your going to wake up Xiaohua!”
“Your the one screaming”
“You are pulling my hair!”
“You don't brush your hair”
“Why do you care?” Nezha huffed “now will you let me explain?”
Macaque stared down at the jet-black hair in his hands, it looked perfect. Well brushed out, soft and clean. With some focus Macaque can hear the dim humming of glamor magic spread across every strand.
“You should set a good example for Xiaohua” Macaque says poking his finger into the thick bundle of hair “she is a baby”
“And you plan to be her older brother, right?” Macaque watched closely the way Nezha’s shoulders tensed ever so slightly and how his breathe hitched.
“W-wwell, i-i, i am-”
“So you should set a better example then this, and you can start by taking. Off. your glamors” Macaque demanded with one fnal tug of Nezha’s hair earning a hiss of pain from the boy “at least around your hair”
Nezha was silent for a moment “fine” He sighed, Macaque looked over Nezha’s shoulder and wondered if the boy knew he was pouting like a child, Macaque decided not to comment on it and let him be.
I love how in any and every au every child of Macaque hates and attacks Peng onsite.
Ref.
It's Beef on Sight (or maybe chicken?)
Baby Monkey sees Bama/Baba Macaque fighting Big Birdie = Baby Monkey wants to attack Big Birdie.
Even in AUs where Peng is on better terms with the Monkie Kids; the baby monkeys see their Bama arguing with this weird huge bird, and want to defend him.
In macaques (especially Barbary), males will often stop fights between eachother by one of them offering the wronged party an infant to hold. The wronged monkey gets so distracted by the cuteness of the baby that they forget what the fight was about.
Macaques will also bond together socially by sharing babysitting duty. The social act is considered so important that long-standing rivals will come to a truce to care for the infant.
So imagine Sun Wukong and Macaque about to fight when...
SWK: "Wait! Consider this!" *holds out MK*
Macaque: "...ok he is pretty adorable." *takes MK and holds him. Starts grooming his hair.*
MK, throughly confused: "What is happening??"
SWK, smugly: "Monkey instincts. You're doing great bud."
*some time passes*
SWK: "...ok, can I have my successor back now?"
Macaque: *hisses and holds MK closer*
SWK: "Aww come on! You've been holding him all day! It's my turn!"
MK: *has fallen asleep by now*
Just the two playing on eachothers instincts as a battle strategy and failing terribly.
Hmm...actually, once the identities are revealed...how do Sandy, Pigsy and Tang feel about whenever SWK or Mac casually drop a gods name casually, like "Oh, Nezha said he might drop by later", like that has to feel weird, y'know?
Macaque tries to keep things subtle around the noodle shop gang, but Wukong slips up occasionally.
When Nezha first appears at the shop pre-reveal looking like a grungy teenage demon with snake features (he's associated with them in the mythos) and SWK welcomes him warmly - Pigsy and Tang just assume the kid is relative that the monkey couple trusted enough to know where they are. Soon Nezha starts to get used to being treated like An Actual Child by adults who care about him and his mature facade starts to break down. The noodle shop gang think its more that the kid has a rough home life and needs a safe place to hang out. So whats the harm in letting the little guy stay too?
After the two monkey's are revealled as the Monkey King and the Six Eared Macaque however? Many questions are asked.
Pigsy: *turns to look at "Nez"*
Nezha: "..."
Pigsy: "Let me guess... Lotus Prince right?"
Nezha: "Yeah."
Pigsy: "You gonna turn back into your real form or...?"
Nezha, looking a bit bashful: "What if I told you the snake-y and gross teenage stuff was my real form?"
Tang: "Oh my gosh... you need acne cream."
Pigsy: "TANG!"
Tang: "I'm just saying! Human puberty is bad enough! Imagine being immortal with it! He needs to keep moisturized!"
Pigsy: "Well, atleast he's been eating decently since he's been here... could use more protein though."
Sandy: "And plenty of rest! You can't burn the candle at both ends! Even if it's infinite!"
Nezha: *is honestly touched* (Ｔ▽Ｔ)
But yeah the gang do get confused at times when the monkeys bring up random names in history/mythology they know. Like "Cooking with Chang'e" airs one night, and Macaque randomly mentions:
Macaque: "Huh, she's on tv? She used to be really nervous with public speaking when we were little."
Pigsy, shellshocked: "How do you know that!?"
Macaque: "She's my sister, duh. I was born from a moon rock. She helped raise me until I moved to Flower Fruit Mountain to be with other Monkey demons."
Pigsy: *incomprehensible spluttering*
Tang: "Does she actually like mooncakes, or is that more a commercial thing?"
Macaque: "She likes them, but her favorite kind has osmanthus in it."
Pigsy & Tang: *aggressively takes notes for different reasons*
After a while it gets more annoying than amazing. Especially since Pigsy was already unimpressed with any immortal who wasn't Chang'e.
Erlang: "I require an audience with Sun Wukong."
Pigsy, not even looking up from the stove: "He's on break."
Erlang: "I assume you did not hear me correctly. I require an immediate audience with Sun Wukong."
Pigsy: "And I told you: HE'S ON BREAK! Now you wait, buy something, or scram!"
Erlang, stunned: "......lamb noodles please."
*Wukong returns from break to see Erlang feeding his dog bits of lamb.*
Erlang: "Wukong, you must understand that my visit is not one of pleasure. I have tasked myself to inquire about the status of your mission regarding The Egg."
Wukong: "No egg here! Except for whats in the fridge. Hehehe." *dad joke*
Erlang, glaring with all three eyes: "Hmm..."
Wukong: *sweating nervously*
Erlang: "...ok. I can see that you're truthful in that there is no Cosmic Egg present in this facility. Why you busy yourself in these mortals matters is beyond me. But be warned simian..."
Wukong: "What?"
Erlang: "We should spar more often, bro. Me and the Plum Hill boys starting to miss you on the training grounds. Plus you're starting to look fluffier."
*Erlang and his dog leaves*
Wukong: "Phew! Glad I got rid of him!"
Macaque, returns from getting cheese tea, visibly pregnant: "What that jerk want?"
Wukong: "Old work stuff."
Macaque: "He's lucky I'm incapacitated, or I would have neutered him to match his hound."
Wukong: "I know you would."
Tang: *trying desperately not to explode cus was that just Erlang Shen?!*
Sandy is a lot more chill. That person he just talked to was a god? That's cool! Hope he's made a new friend today! Accidentally befriends a bunch of them just by being a cool dude. The dragon kingdoms think he's a great ambassador.
