#nailed it

[livelovecaliforniadreams]

[sparkpup]

*points between your legs* hey do you . d. do you need. do you need anybody to stim on that. with their mouth

[taskmastersource]

Have the most exhilarating near miss with this paint balloon. You have 20 minutes. Your time starts now.

TASKMASTER 21x10 • Domestic Bumfluff

[minchns]

MINCHAN ✦ MUSIC CORE PRE-RECORDING BEHIND

+ bonus:

[sozvezdiyay]

Imagine Ilya competing on a celebrity version of Nailed It! because he gets really into baking in his retirement but he's also so bad at it.

He believes his kids deserve homemade treats (just like his Mama used to make) and he's determined to be the Best Papa Ever. His kids love him even though somehow the Russian tea cakes are always burned on the bottom. Crucially, Ilya's mama was also a terrible baker, so the cookies taste just right to him, and he's just like "you fuckers are all wrong, these are perfect cookies" while the kids giggle and Shane yells "Swear jar!" from across the house.

The kids nominate him for Nailed It! and Ilya is like "FINALLY I will prove you fuckers wrong" (I'm suddenly very attached to Ilya calling his kids "fuckers" lmaoooo it's funny To Me don't @ me)

But the only thing he proves is that he was made in a lab to thrive on a chaotic reality show with Nicole Byer.

Ilya has to make a wedding cake and sculpts two terrible looking hockey players out of modeling chocolate for the top. It looks like they're holding their dicks, but Ilya swears that they were supposed to be hockey sticks. Nicole Byer can't even talk because she's laughing so hard.

(For those unfamiliar with the show's premise: "Home bakers with a terrible track record take a crack at re-creating edible masterpieces for a $10,000 prize. It's part reality contest, part hot mess.")

............anyway, please discuss.

[pinkswall11]

Gerald Scarfe’s sketch of Roger Water’s “typical posture”

[bhellion]

Shocking

(most definitely inspired by The Neon Void)