#narcolas

[hawper]

Small Hands- Radical Face (4/4)

A s1 dndads comic :D Pages 1-2

I've had these pages like 80% done for weeks and only just now got like a SECOND to finish them up LOL.

[normscary]

if nicholas foster has a million fans i am one of them. if nicholas foster has ten fans i am one of them. if nicholas foster has one fan, that's me. if nicholas foster has no fans, i'm dead. if the world is against nicholas foster then i am against the world.

[themonsterrawrr]

Lark is NOT THAT SHORT NARCOLAS SHUT UP

(Click for better quality)

I’ve been practicing drawing anatomy digitally using those blank character bases and I’m obsessed so they’ve all been turning into podcast characters enjoy my fave boys tho

Nicolas without the horns and the base I used ⬇️

[bitemarx]

smoke lingers

[mispelled]

Something something Nick being a good kid on the inside and trying to mask as a rebel something something Narcolas seeming like an angel on the outside until discovering the demon inside himself

[soullglue]

I've been having some (scattered and unhelpful) thoughts about Nicky being transmasc and how that affects the Nick vs. Narcolas situation, and I thought I'd make a post abt it!

Senseless blabbering under the cut ⚠️

(for the purposes of this post, Nick is pre Meth bay and Glenn's son, Nicolas/Narcolas is post Meth bay and Jodie's son and Nicky is post demon-ification)

Ok! So, I headcanon Nick Close to be transmasc (whether binary or not isn't important rn). The real question is, Is Nicolas also transmasc?

Possibility 1) Nicolas is transmasc. Growing up Jodie's kid, he was exposed to queer people, yes, (I don't think Jodie is transphobic/homophobic or anything) but it would've definitely been a very sanitized, corporate, binary queerness. I think Nicolas would've realized he was trans at a very young age, Idolizing his dad and wishing he could be like him. Realizing he was trans kinda made that fiction seem more reasonable and attainable, so he wouldn't have pushed the feelings down. I think talking to his dad about this would've been a fairly "typical" coming out. Lots of "I love you no matter what" and "this is a big decision but I will support you". Support, but it was also a serious matter.

Nick on the other hand would've grown up with Glenn and (only while he was very young) Morgan. At least in my head, they would've both been pretty down with gender fuckery and playfulness around gender expression and identity. Like Nicolas, Nick would've also realized pretty young, given his parents exposing him to Queer culture and making sure he knew he could be whatever he wanted. When he came out it wasn't ceremonial or anything, and was met with a resounding "fuck yeah! Rock on man".

When Nicky was """created""" these memories coincided and heightened his awareness of the differences in his upbringing and also how he lives now. I'm sure there's some good potential for stories, angst and fics in there.

Possibility 2) Nicolas is a cisgender boy.

Nicolas grows up surrounded by men like his dad, masculine and, in his eyes, perfect. He is constantly trying to be like his dad, and feeling inadequate because of that. Alongside this impossible standard of manhood he is being raised in, he is also having to face the challenges and toxicity of cis boyhood.

As he becomes Nicky, the memories of the playfulness of being raised by Glenn and being trans are mixed with the experience of being surrounded by unachievable toxic masculinity of being Nicolas. Nicky has no idea if he counts as trans or not, being he technically has the body of a cis boy, (something Nick longed for.) He has a very complicated relationship to womanhood and being trans, while also having lived as a cis boy too. Let's face it, at least in my experience cisgender boys are taught to be transphobic, homophobic, racist, ableist and every terrible thing in the book. Although I doubt Nicolas was the worst, he still grew up in a "agree with these terrible 'jokes' or you're out" environment, one that is suffocating and hypnotic to be in. The cognitive dissonance and later guilt he would've experienced upon remembering his life as Nick, as a transmasc, would've been painful at best, downright excruciating at worst. (Kinda a really extreme version of the human experience of doing something wrong then regretting it later.)

In my personal experience, I spent the first 12 years of my life as a cisgender girl, and to be completely honest I had some fucked up opinions on neopronoun users, furries, alt people and people who are nowadays called 'cringe'. It fucking sucks looking back on that even though I've since come out as trans and bi (and am dating a neopronoun user!!!! Hi Leonardodicapriowo!!!!) I still (correctly) feel incredibly guilty about the things I thought and the things I said. (I'm fairly sure I wasn't vocal about my opinions and never really hurt anyone, but you can never know) I also feel like that concept could be explored really interestingly with Nicky.

Idk these thoughts have just been floating around in my head for a while and I thought I'd write em down somewhere!

[belltaleheart]

Probably unpopular opinion but I loved Narcolas sm. Like yeah he was an annoying shit but he had annoying little brother vibes and I miss him

[artists-apeiron]

Glenn says goodbye to his son

I get it now

and you do too, don’t you?

I’m not a good father Nick.

Nor was my father 

I wanted to give you more than I had

I wanted to make Morgan proud.

I should have been there for you 

I wish we had talked more.

Break the cycle Nick

You’re better than me and my dad, you’ve always been 

you’re kind

you’re caring

you’re cool

you’re Morgan’s legacy

you’re Jodie Foster’s son

(Thank God,) you’re nothing like me

I’m sorry

I’m sorry but don’t you dare look back

It’s my fault 

Kids should not pay for their father’s sins.

Go, be happy

And maybe, if you have the time, remember me

No, my bad, I meant forget

I’m proud of you Nick