we need a part two to the fratboy reaction thing you wrote i cried laughing ajfjahahjaka
(tosses this post like i throw bread at stray birds) there's your meal for the year
NCT 2022 as your final school presentation partner
side note: since i am the principal at this uni/college/higher education establishment I have decided that this will be for an english presentation. also i do realise that this does not count as a part two but dont worry i might do one in about seven years time!
Johnny: You stare holes into his laptop from across the lecture hall once your partner is announced. He thinks you’re just curious about what he’s watching, and turns the screen to reveal a custom car parts video. Despite your initial apprehension-and failing to convince your professor to change partners, he is a fairly decent partner (he made the google doc) and contributes his fair share (he offered to do most of the talking). Shows up 20 minutes late to the actual class absolutely hammered but takes it like a champ. 6/10, thanks for making the google doc, mate.
Taeil: Everything is fine until he tells you that he can't work in the campus library- he HAS to be in his dorm room. You nod along, already mentally reminding yourself to bring pepper spray in case you enter his room and there are star wars posters. Definitely INSISTS on playing music, and sings to it like his life depends on it. Like no babe, your life depends on these slides you're neglecting. Turns the script into a song to memorise it faster, and you can't believe it actually helped the both of you. No star wars posters, so the pepper spray was left untouched, 8/10, ♫ Good moooooorning everyoooooone today we will be discusssssing Littleee woomeeeeeen♫
Taeyong: For a party guy, he’s super nice and willing to do the work- it’s just that he has a horde of friends that tail him everywhere. It’s not exactly productive to be in the library (quiet) with ten dudes chatting up a storm (not quite) two tables away. Offers to buy you coffee because he feels bad, so at least your wallet is happier than your ears. During the presentation, his bros are attentively taking notes and roar into applause when you conclude the presentation. 6/10 The chorus of “MY BRO IS SO SMART” is oddly sweet, and you are thankful one of them added on “AND YOU TOO LADY” Because yeah, you too lady!
Yuta: Offers you a 100 dollar note to finish it by yourself, and when you decline he’s like ‘oh ok i’ll do it then’. You thought about changing your career goals to becoming a cultural negotiator, because that was easy. Does the absolute bare minimum, and flirts with you the entire time- shoes up on the library table and all. But it’s not all that bad, because he teaches you how to accessorize and shows you his cool tattoo. During the presentation you looked scared and plain next to him, mostly because he was decked out in full leather and facial jewelry. 4/10, could’ve told you there was a dress code.
Kun: Lets you work at his nice apartment right outside of campus. How can he afford it? You don’t want to ask! Makes a plan on how to equally divide the workload, always texts you updates on his slides, offers advice if you need it and is generally a fantastic partner. Once the presentation is over, he resumes his role in your life as the nice guy you look at from two rows below you. 10/10 next project you’ll try to be his friend. Next project…
Doyoung: ACADEMIC WEAPON. Mate, you don’t even see this guy. He just randomly emails you a utterly phenomenal proposal for the project, you reply “this is great! When are you free to work on it?” He just attached the finished thing. It’s bulletproof, with great analyzes, and even has potential questions + answers for you to review. You meet for the first time AT the presentation, and when you ask him why he just did everything, he stone-faced replies: “I’m very passionate about metaphors.” 8/10 You were also very passionate about them, but clearly not as much as he was.
Ten: On his phone when your group was assigned; so you decide to approach him. Which was your first mistake, because once you enter a ten meter radius of him you begin sweating- and you’re only mildly offended asks who you are. You two work in his friend’s tattoo studio (why does his friend have a tattoo studio), and he will doodle up designs for you unprompted. You are 1) impressed at how good he is at drawing 2) forgetting that THERE IS A PROJECT FOCUS BITCH. 4/10 you failed, but got a sick tattoo that’s better than Yuta’s.
Jaehyun: In shows, the jock is usually an idiot until the last moment, where he magically develops super smart sense and aces the project. Not Jaehyun though, he’s a fucking moron. At some point, you just have to tell to shut up; he’s a good partner until he opens his mouth. Hey, at least his face is nice to look at, and you know who to call if you need someone’s head knocked in. 6/10 What do you mean you don’t know what a proposition is? You’re taking an ENGLISH DEGREE!
Winwin: Will be twenty minutes late. Will also bring his roommate’s dog over, which you don’t know if you’re thankful for or not. You two will interact with the social aptitude of two underdeveloped microorganisms; and he will combust if you look at him for more than a second. Not in the flustered, more in the apathetic introverted way. 4/10, you had never been so silent in your entire schooling years.
Jungwoo: Lovely boy, thank the stars you got partnered with him and not Jaehyun. The only disconcerting thing about him is that he has to type lying on his belly with his feet kicking in the air. But fuck it! You join him, and suddenly you two are middle school girls gossiping about academic essays. You both spend more time decorating the slides than finding information. 10/10 You do think that he is your long lost other half.
Mark: Despite this being a completely professional situation; with no romance and barely even any possibility for friendship, he still manages to have zero rizz. Zero Academic Rizz, as one might call it. But when he’s not embarrassing himself by stuttering eight times in five words, he gives you decent feedback and is surprisingly emotionally intelligent for being a man. Brought you a half-melted chocolate bar before the presentation because the day before you complained about cramps. 9/10 You go, Mark! Even if you mispronounced ‘theoretically’ in front of the theory teacher!
Xiaojun: Right there alongside Taeil with the massive inclination to sing his heart out. I do imagine that he is also studying musical theatre, so god bless your heart. Do you know how distracting it is to hear phantom of the opera while you study catcher in the rye? To be fair, he also lets you occasionally listen to Nicki Minaj, which he turns into melodic opera. 2/10, he ended the presentation with ♫anyyyyyyyyy quueeeeeeeeestions♫ and you wanted to die.
Hendery: Goofy (derogatory) Silly (insultingly) Despite not knowing him before this presentation, you forcibly grew so close with him in the span of a week that you began smacking him with your laptop every time he went on a tangent. Even if you had screaming matches outside the library (you got kicked out), you two still managed to make an outstanding social commentary within the amazing world of gumball. 10/10, he got yelled at for dancing while the professor asked her question.
Renjun: He regards you the same way you regard your friend’s 13 year old, freshly intellectually sentient sibling. Is definitely more interested in texting his friends than talking to you, but you like it that way (you think to yourself spitefully). You purposely don't decorate his slides, but his script is so good that the professor doesn't even notice it. 1/10, the one point is for when he told you that you formatted your script wrong.
Jeno: Asks if you can come to the gym and work with him there. At first you say no, but it seems like his schedule is severely booked, and you finally relent. It sort of looks like you are his secretary, with your laptop in your hands, typing the words his grunts out between sets. All things considered, he knows alot about the topic without having to reference anything. The project is finished within three sessions, and you are forced to do some exercise 3/3 times. 8/10, the smell of sweat is horrendous, but he makes a pretty good personal trainer. One more! One more! You got this!!
Haechan: You both didn’t get anything done. Not for the lack of effort, but for the sheer amount of banter. And fighting. Lots of fighting- but your favourite colours are opposites, how were you meant to find the best slide background? The project’s pushed to the night before, and the two of you spend 5 hours straight at a McDonalds, drinking copious amounts of coke zero and ignoring the minimum wage workers trying to tell you that you shouldn’t order any more fries. 2/10, he threw said fries at you and the salt lodged itself in your keyboard.
Jaemin: Neither of you want to do the work, so he finds an existing presentation on the topic and you just… steal it. When the professor confronts you both about the obvious plagiarism, Jamein induces WW2 mental warfare to psychologically manipulate the professor into thinking she’s crazy, and that she was being unprofessional by assuming her students couldn’t produce a high quality of work. 10/10 After the presentation, Jaemin whispered to you: “Victory by any means necessary.”
Yangyang: Imagine this, 3AM, two students sitting at the library with drained faces, staring at a blank laptop screen. That’s what working with yangyang is like. Since both of you were procrastination-fueled learners, there was nothing to do but wait until the dreadful deadline approached and suddenly, you both would turn into geniuses. You moved for the first time in an hour when he offered to drive to burger king. 5/10 BURGER KING! The idea of a whopper ignites your ability to start the slides.
Shotaro: Like Jungwoo, is a pleasure to work with, even if he is a little unremarkable. That being said, both of you had no idea how to answer one of the questions, and the two of you just exchanged concerned glances until the professor answered it for you. 5/10, both of you went to starbucks after to freak out and celebrate simultaneously.
Sungchan (I REALISED I SPELT HIM NAME WRON GIN THE OTHER POST OMG IM SO SORRY GIRL): This dude probably refuses to do work until you threaten him with either physical or mental torture (your choice, artistic interpretation) and he makes an extra effort to press each key as loudly as he can with a typing speed of half a word per minute. 2/10 During the actual presentation you two can’t stop from fighting to the point that the professor has to split you two apart.
Chenle: You kill him. 0/10. Smack him over the head, and he still maintains the bratty disposition. He is the test sent by God, and one you cannot pass.
Jisung: Would be super nice to work with, but surrounded by his upperclassmen, harassing him for no reason other than their preconceived role in his life. But it’s cool, because you have noise-cancelling earbuds, and also because it’s sort of funny to watch him whine and complain. When you can actually work alone, you find that he has to refill his americano at least three times per session. 6/10 Whether his hands shaking was from nerves, or a lethal caffeine overdose, you’ll never know.
