Addictive ● PJS
Content tags ☆ friends to lovers, gn!reader, unistudent!reader and jisung, jisung and reader are in denial, angst if you squint, jisung has a girlfriend for the majority of this but its not serious at all, yearning for a taken man ig?, chenle and haechan are minor characters but relevant none the less, song mingi atz cameo, jisung gets played a little bless him
☆ 4.7k Words
Park Jisung was your best friend, he had been since you were both 15. You'd watched him grow from a dorky little teen to the tall, handsome nerd he was now. And yet you were just friends. You always had been. Going round each other's house to do homework, sitting on the swings in the park while talking about life, had turned into getting drunk in each other's uni dorm and getting groceries together. If Jisung had a doctor's appointment, you'd go with him. If you wanted to try a new cafe, Jisung would tag along. That's always how it'd been and that's how it would be forever. This didn't come without its struggles though. Jisung's current girlfriend, Hanna, hated your relationship with him. She didn't hate you, she couldn't, you got on well, she just hated how close you were.
“Hanna thinks I'm flirting with you” He mumbled one day, staring at the ceiling as he laid on your bed, throwing and catching one of your stuffed animals while you studied.
“Flirting with me?” You parroted, your tone surprised. “Does she even know you?” You laughed.
“Exactly! She says I treat you differently to her, which doesn't make sense because of course I would. She's my girlfriend. You're my best friend.” Jisung rambled. “I'm not gonna treat you two the same. Then I'd just have two girlfriends, or two best friends”
“Haechan said something similar actually,” You suddenly remembered, putting your highlighter down and turning your chair to face Jisung. “When we were at the bar last week. He was drunk so he probably didn't even know what he was talking about. He said we flirt all the time.”
Jisung raised an eyebrow and let out a half-scoff half-laugh, “people are dumb. We've never flirted with each other ever.”
You nodded in agreement. “I think he's just deluded and going through psychosis because that guy he was talking to ended up being a dickhead. What was his name? Mmmmmaa….something. Not important.”
“He was weird,” Jisung agreed. “His head was bigger than mine.” That made you laugh.
You turned back to your textbook, eyes scanning through the paragraphs. “Do you wanna drink tonight?” You asked, not lifting your head.
“Yeah, sure.” He nodded, “Do I need to go grab myself some beers?”
“Uh…” You leant sideways to reach the minifridge on the floor next to your desk, cracking it open to see the contents. “Nope, still got some here from last time”
Jisung just hummed, tossing the stuffed animal he'd been fidgeting with to join its friends at the end of your bed before standing up. “ ‘m gonna go find Hanna while you're studying. If I hang out with her for a bit now she won't insist I hang out with her tonight.”
“Okay Ji” you called out, not bothering to look up. He could see himself out, he had countless times before.
--
Your dorm was weirdly quiet without Jisung, you'd gotten used to the little hums and tuts he'd make while thinking. Nevertheless you continued studying, the sooner you were done the sooner you could get drunk. The next three hours passed painfully slowly, all the information from your textbook going in one ear and straight out the other. You slammed the book closed with a sigh before messaging Jisung to let him know you were done, tidying your room a little while you waited for his return.
Jisung knocked on your dorm room's door 30 minutes later. “Sorry I took so long… Hanna kept thinking of one more thing she had to say." he apologised as you opened the door, causing you to shake your head.
“It's fine, honestly. She's your girlfriend” You shrugged. “You wanna watch a film?” You asked, pouring yourself a vodka pepsi.
“Sure…. But can we watch The Avengers?” He asked sheepishly, grabbing a beer from the minifridge and using the edge of your, already tattered, desk to pop the cap off.
“Again?” You laughed, sitting on your bed and pulling your laptop onto your lap, connecting it to your projector. “We watched it like last week.”
“I just really like it.” Jisung laughed a little, joining you on your bed. It was a cramped fit, being a single bed and having the projector screen hung at the foot of your bed, but neither of you minded. He pulled a pillow into his lap and watched your laptop screen as you scrolled through Netflix.
“Why not one of the newer avengers films?” You suggested, looking up at him. Jisung nodded in response, swigging his beer.
You got comfy as you started the film, sipping your own drink and placing your laptop on the floor.
Movie nights with Jisung were usually pretty uneventful, both of you preferring to sit quietly rather than talk over the film. Jisung nudged you a couple times, a gentle flick of his hand on your arm or thigh, pointing to the minifridge. You would hum and shift out from under the blanket you'd acquired, grabbing him another beer and returning to your comfortable position. By the time the film had finished Jisung was three and a half beers in and had passed out on your bed, his head against the wall and mouth slightly agape.
“Idiot” you whispered affectionately, taking the half empty beer bottle from his hand to prevent it from spilling. You tidied your room from the empty beer bottles, soda cans, and sweet wrappers, your own head spinning from the alcohol you'd consumed. You found yourself glancing over at Jisung's sleeping form every so often. He had such a sweet face, so soft, pouty. He also had a girlfriend. You shook your head to rid the thoughts before powering your laptop off and returning it to your desk.
“Jisung,” you whispered, gently shaking him by his arm. “Jisung.” The taller boy whined slightly in response, slouching even further into your bed. You sighed and shook him harder. “Jisung, come on. I need to go to sleep. You're in my bed.” You urged.
“So?” Jisung mumbled drunkenly, his eyes cracking open. “There's room for the both of us” he shifted over slightly, patting your bed.
“Youre so annoying” You sighed, climbing into your bed, making sure there was ample distance between the two of you.
“Yay…. Sleepover. ” Jisung slurred, grinning. “Goodnight y/n~”
“Goodnight, idiot.” Your words were quiet, heart racing. You weren't nearly as drunk as jisung was. Sober enough to tell that this was a bad idea. His cologne was suddenly the strongest smell in the world, his body radiating heat. You weren't allowed to have feelings for a taken man, let alone your best friend.
--
Neither of you woke up with the sun, nor to your alarm, nor to Haechan banging on your door. It was between 2pm and 3pm when you eventually awoke, stretching yourself out in a way that honestly felt better than an orgasm, before freezing. A weight on your waist, around your stomach. A soft breeze on the back of your neck. Jisung had pushed himself as close to you as he could in his sleep, an arm wrapped around your middle and his head pressed against the back of your neck. You quickly freed yourself from his grip, staring down at his sleeping form in your bed. Fuck he looked good. Almost addictively good. You were fucked.
“Jisung” You called out, shaking him awake.
“Mmmm…. What?” He groaned, his more than adequate sleep making his voice drop a couple octaves.
“You need to get out of my room now,” You said, picking up your phone, “you stink.” A lie.
Jisung just let out a whiney groan, curling up on himself. “Later”
“No! Not later. Now. It's nearly 3pm. Go bother your girlfriend or something.” Girlfriend. The word a necessary reminder to the both of you.
“She'll be in a lecture” He mumbled, sitting up and rubbing his eyes, the hoodie he had fallen asleep in had unzipped itself slightly, exposing his collarbone and a generous amount of his chest.
You diverted your gaze quickly, taking a sudden interest in your empty water bottle. “I don't care. Get out”
Jisung frowned and fixed his zipper, sliding out of your bed. “Why are you so grouchy?” He asked, running his fingers through his hair and slipping his slides on.
“Because I've got a big exam coming up and I've just wasted half the day sleeping!” You bluffed.
Jisung side eyed you, grabbing his backpack. “... can we play minecraft later?” He asked quietly.
You stared at him and shook your head in disbelief. “Maybe. If I'm free. Now go”
Jisung huffed and shuffled over to your door, pouting slightly as he left. You knew he'd drop the pout as soon as the door shut, he was just being childish.
You collapsed back onto your bed. Truthfully, you had no plans to study today. You just needed Park Jisung and his stupid attractive face to get out of your room. You turned your phone on, noticing a missed call from Haechan hours earlier, quickly returning the call.
“Hello?” Haechan hummed.
“You phoned me”
“Did I? Oh. Yeah. You weren't answering your door this morning, I thought you'd died or something” Haechan said, you could hear him shuffling around in his dorm room, probably tidying up for once.
“So I was majorly unresponsive and you gave up after two tries?” You laughed, “what if I actually needed help and no one knew?”
“....I didn't think about that.” Haechan mumbled.
“You don't think much ever,” You teased, “What did you even need?”
“Jisung wasn't answering Chenle nor Hanna's calls, was gonna ask if you'd seen him”
“Oh. Yeah he crashed in my.. On my floor last night.” You caught yourself at the last moment, you really didn't need Haechan getting any ideas.
“...in?” You could practically hear the shit eating grin.
“No. No.” Your voice was stern, like you were scolding him. “He's my best friend, Haechan. And he has a girlfriend.”
“So that's the only thing stopping you? Hanna?” He asked, the rustling from his end had stopped, he'd locked in the second you slipped up.
“No, Haechan!” You sighed, “I don't like Jisung like that. We've been friends forever.”
“Which is why you totally do like him like that. It's impossible to be friends with someone for that long and not develop at least a little crush.” Haechan hummed. “I'm coming round”
“It's so not impossible, you're just a perv” you argued. “And I don't want you in my room, you stink.” Your go-to insult, apparently.
“You stink,” he retaliated. “You should be thankful I’m blessing you with my presence” the phone line cut dead. The bastard hung up on you.
Haechan only lived on the floor above you so he arrived at your door within a minute after hanging up, knocking on it firmly as he always did.
“You're gonna break my door one day, stop” you huffed as you let him in. He immediately kicked his shoes off and got himself comfortable on your bed, practically tucking himself in. “Really?” You asked, watching him.
“What? Your beds comfy” Haechan shrugged, leaning against one of the pillows. He sniffed once, as if clearing his nose, and squinted. “I know Jisung's cologne when I smell it. He totally did sleep in here you liar!” He exclaimed, “...did you hook up?” His voice dropped to a whisper.
“What?! No!!” You practically squeaked. “Oh my god you're so annoying” you exclaimed, collapsing onto your desk chair. “He got wasted and fell asleep in my bed. That's all.”
“And where did you sleep?” Haechan asked, looking at you pointedly.
“....in my bed.” His immediate smirk pissed you off. “I didn't open my door to you for you to terrorise me, Lee Haechan”
“If I encourage him to break up with Hanna will you ask him out?” Haechan asked, propping his head up on one arm.
“You'll do no such thing. They're happy together.”
“That's what you think.”
“That's what i know” you insisted.
“You don't have guy talks with him though, ” Haechan shrugged, “They've been arguing a lot.”
“Just shut up. Hanna's already wary of me, I don't want to prove her right.” You sighed, rubbing your hands over your face.
“So you do have a crush on Jisung?” He asked, earning a death stare.
“It's not a crush. Just… I can acknowledge when someone's attractive” You mumbled.
--
Exactly one week later and your small friend group — you, jisung, hanna, haechan, and chenle — were headed towards one of the clubs near campus, as per Hanna's birthday request.
“It's my birthday! I get free entry!” She had grinned, the night before in a, successful, attempt to convince the group.
The thought of Jisung still played in the back of your mind, how cute he looked while sleeping, how you'd woken up to him holding you. It was tormenting you.
You all ordered your respective drinks at the bar as soon as you got in, Chenle taking one for the team and fighting his way through the crowd to secure a booth. You picked up Chenles order and headed in the direction you saw him go, Haechan and the lovebirds close behind.
“We really need to find a new club,” Haechan complained. “This one's full of students”
“...we're students” Hanna laughed.
“Not this type of student though” He mumbled, sliding into the booth next to Chenle. The drinks went down quickly, everyone buying at least one round each. Jisung had been dragged onto the dance floor by Hanna, much to his dismay. He'd never been a dancer. Well not in this setting anyway. He was a dance major. He just preferred perfected routines over mindless bopping in a sweaty, cramped club.
Haechan eyed you, noticing you watching Jisung. “Offer's still there.”
“Shut up” You mumbled, turning your attention back to the table.
“What offer?” Chenle asked.
“Nothing. There's no offer.” You said quickly, before Haechan could gossip more.
“Y/N has a crush on Jisung.” Haechan grinned.
“I do not!”
“I knew it!!!” Chenle exclaimed, his eyes shining. “I knew there was something going on. You two are always flirting with each other."
“Aren't they!”
“We are Not!” You defended, burying your head in your hands. “We literally don't flirt with each other ever.”
“You so do,” Chenle teased. “I've seen the way you look at him”
“I don't look at him like anything.”
Haechan and Chenle just exchanged a knowing glance. “They shared a bed last week” Haechan said quickly, distancing himself from you as you went to hit him.
Chenles jaw dropped. “You did not.”
“Not like that!” You groaned. Being friends with gossiping boys was so tiring. “He passed out on my bed and I didn't have anywhere else to sleep. That's it”
Chenle just smirked at you. “Mhm… Did you like it?”
“What kind of question is that?” You laughed in disbelief.
“A good one.”
“No it's not, and there wasn't anything to enjoy. We were sleeping.” You said, getting annoyed.
Haechan quickly waved his hands, silencing you and Chenle just as Hanna arrived back at the table, gulping down the rest of her drink. “Me and Jisung are gonna head out, he said he's got a birthday surprise for me~” she grinned knowingly, wiggling her eyebrows.
You just nodded in acknowledgement.
“Stay safe.” Chenle called out after her, waiting until she was out of earshot before looking back at you.
“Don't look at me like that.” You mumbled, your expression bitter.
“You so have a crush on him,” Haechan laughed. You didn't fight it this time. You weren't convincing them anyway. “Are you sure you dont want me to convince him to leave her?”
“Just stop,” You mumbled “I dont care.”
Chenle slipped out of the booth, ordering another round for you all. He could tell you needed it.
“You've just gotta get with someone hotter than him,” Haechan said once Chenle had returned. “Show him what he's missing or something.”
You just glared at Haechan, he got the hint.
Within the hour the three of you made your way out of the club and back to the university dorms, retiring to your own rooms. Your head spun as you laid in bed, staring at the ceiling. You'd definitely drank too much. You couldn't help it. You hurt. You were yearning. Jisung was ruining your life and he didnt even know it. It just wasn't meant to be, and that was OK. It had to be.
--
Despite absolutely hating Haechan's jealousy-inducing tactic, it was tempting… you didn't even technically have to sleep with anyone, just going on a date or two was surely enough to spread uni gossip. Which is exactly how you ended up sitting opposite Song Mingi at the same shitty club your friends frequented. Mingi was a typical campus heart throb. Everyone wanted him, no matter their gender. He'd seen you completely zoned out in the park next to the university a week ago, resulting in you explaining your dilemma to him. Mingi wasn't one for settling down just yet, wasn't one for dates. He worked in the shadows, let's say. Pump and dump. He did, however, love stirring drama. Which worked out in your favour perfectly, he promised to be seen on a few ‘dates’ with you in exchange for the highest luxury of all, free drinks.
“Is he really worth all this?” Mingi asked, leaning against the wall of a booth. “He always seems… like a bit of a loser”
You laughed a little. He wasn't wrong. “He is, both worth it and a loser. He's a loser in the best way possible.”
Mingi hummed in response, “I know a few people like that. Complete idiots but great people.”
You laughed and nodded, falling into casual conversation with him. Similar scenarios played out two or three more times over the course of the next two weeks. You and Mingi just hanging out in the public eye, innocently enough to the both of you but scandalous to anyone onlooking. The times you weren't with Mingi, you barely saw anyone, each member of your friend group locking in for your upcoming final exams. Jisung would visit occasionally, sitting on the floor to study for his theory test while you studied at your desk. “I concentrate better when other people are around.” he reasoned.
He was on edge lately, tense. He insisted he was fine and didn't want to talk about it but you could tell something was bothering him. He was mentioning Hanna less and less as well.
“Are you sure you're ok?” You asked for what felt like the twentieth time that night after hearing him sigh heavily again.
“I’m fine” He muttered, running his hand through his hair. You just watched him for a short while. You didn't believe him.
“What's Hanna done?” You asked eventually, moving out of your chair to sit opposite him on the floor.
Jisung stayed silent for a while, maybe a couple of minutes. He hoped you would give up and leave him alone if he ignored you. His plan was evidently not working. “She's not done anything” He sighed. “Just… she wants to transfer to a different uni afrer the summer. One that has more opportunities for her field” He mumbled.
You nodded slightly. “OK…”
“She doesn't want to do long distance” Jisung whispered. You could hear the upset in his voice, and you felt like a bitch for being happy that this meant they'd break up eventually.
“I'm sorry, Ji” You said quietly. You weren't sorry. At all. He just shrugged, mumbling something about it not being your fault.
“Whats up with you anyway?” He asked, his whole demeanor changing as he looked at you.
“What's up with me?” You repeated, “what do you mean?”
“Song Mingi? Since when were you two… whatever you two are?”
“We aren't anything. Just, friends.”
“Mingi doesn't do ‘just friends’, not with girls anyway.”
“Well maybe he does now. Who am I to know? Why do you even care?”
Jisung ignored your question. “So you've not like. Done anything with him?”
You raised an eyebrow, “Why do you care?” You asked again.
“I don't." He mumbled, looking down at his revision scattered across your floor again. “Im trying to concentrate leave me alone.”
You let out a breath of amusement through your nose, rolling your eyes and gently smacking the back of his head before returning to your desk.
--
Jisung had relied on you heavily over the next two months, completely in the wrong place mentally to be able to be making his own decisions. He'd spend the weekends with Hanna and then mope in your bedroom the first evening he was free. He was torturing himself on purpose. You tried to help him, take him to museums, cafés, you even splashed out on special tickets for the observatory in an attempt to cheer him up. It did, for the whole 2 hours the tour lasted.
“Maybe there's a universe out there where she doesn't move away…” He whispered as soon as you both stepped out into the cold night air.
You sighed quietly, looking up at him “Jisung, how affected by this is she?” You asked.
“I dont… know… probably. Probably the same amount.” He nodded in an attempt to reassure himself.
“Don't you think that if Hanna was as invested in your relationship as you are then she'd.. try more? You're always talking about what you do for her, not what she does for you. You're giving her way more care than she's giving you.” You ranted, his lovesickness had irritated you long enough.
“She does love me!” He replied quickly, firmly.
“Does she love you? Or does she love your attention?” Jisung didn't like that, scoffing at you and walking away quickly, leaving you to make your way home alone. He never liked the truth when it hurt him. He was a sensitive kid. He cared too strongly about people that couldn't give it back, and then he got hurt. He wouldn't stay mad at you for long. He never did.
No matter how much Jisung tried to ignore it, the day finally came. You were laying on your bed while Jisung was slumped in your desk chair, spinning slightly while fidgeting with the same stuffed animal of yours he always did. “I just don't get why we couldn't make it work” he mumbled.
You nodded sympathetically, sitting up and passing him a beer bottle that you'd just cracked the lid off of.
“I mean I could do long distance! I'm fine with long distance” He naturally pouted, looking at the floor as he sipped the beer you'd passed him.
“Maybe it's for the better, no? The universe usually has a plan for everyone” you said quietly.
“It's not for the better! I love her.” His voice cracked slightly, causing you to force back a laugh. “Dont laugh at me…”
“I'm sorry, Ji. Really I am.”
He just let out a sort of whine, drinking more of his beer. “You're probably over the moon… you never liked her.”
“That's not true,” you said softly, “I had no problem with her, I just don't think she loved you enough.” He didn't argue. He knew deep down that you were right. You always were right.
You shifted on your bed slightly, laying on your side. All you could think about was him. About how he was finally free, finally available. You hated that that was the case. He'd just been broken up with, for crying out loud. “You want a hug?” You offered, he shook his head. Ouch. Whatever.
--
Two weeks passed and the whole time was spent comforting Jisung while he wallowed in self pity. Safe to say he was not taking the breakup well. “Jisung” you said firmly, he'd been sitting in your bed for the past 3 hours, doing nothing but watching angsty videos on tiktok.
“What?” He sulked.
“I'm sick of hearing that fucking audio. You need to get laid or something. Move on. All you do is complain. It's starting to annoy me.”
He just glanced at you before falling back against the pillow, “no one wants to… no one likes me. Hanna was my first girlfriend, I mean what kinda person only gets into a relationship when they're 22??” he mumbled.
You just looked at him. “I like you.” You said after a few beats of silence.
“I mean yeah I know that. You're my best friend. I mean like like.” He turned to face you.
“I like like you.” You reiterated, your mouth going dry.
Jisung froze, staring at you before quickly turning away. “Shut up...” he mumbled.
“I'm serious,” you insisted. “I have for… a while.”
“You're my best friend…” He whispered, you could still hear the sadness in his voice.
“So? That just means we already know we get on well” You sat on the edge of your bed, not wanting to crowd him.
Jisung shook his head quickly. The mere thought of being more than friends scared him. What if you weren't actually compatible? What if you got tired of him? What if he lost you too? “I- I cant”
“Jisung…” You started.
“I can't,” he repeated, "I don't want to mess things up. I don't want to risk losing you” he said quietly. “I just. I'd rather know you'll always be here”
“I will either way, Jisung.” Your voice grew weak, the rejection hurt. “You mean the world to me. All I've ever wanted is the best for you”
Jisung stayed quiet, fidgeting with his hands. “You think you're the best for me?” He asked eventually. You frowned slightly, confused. “You said you want the best for me. And you want me. So that means you think that you're the best for me”
You hesitated before speaking, “I guess…”
“And I always trust you. You're always right”
You just nodded a little. Your heart was racing.
His gaze flickered over to meet yours, his dark eyes seemingly ten times the size. He thought about what you'd said, about how Hanna didn't truly love him, how he needed to move on, how he deserved more, how he deserved you. “...I guess I can try.” He whispered. “We can try.”
A soft smile graced your face, “yeah?”
“Yeah.” He nodded. The air between the two of you grew thicker suddenly. Your eyes were glued to the patch of skin peeking above the collar of his t-shirt, too nervous to look at him, Jisung's eyes grazed your face, drifting between your eyes and your lips. “Hey.” He mumbled quietly, tapping your jaw with his index finger. “Look at me.”
You hesitated, chewing the inside of your lip before meeting his gaze, your eyes shaking, darting between all of his features.
“You ok?” Jisung asked, his deep voice threading straight down your spine. You nodded gently, your breath stuttering as Jisung rested his forehead against yours. “You're too good to me, too kind,” he mumbled, "don't deserve you.”
“Jisung…” You whispered.
He smiled softly, the corner of his lips retreating inwards. His breath was hot on your face. “You're cute.” He admitted quietly, neck and ears flushing red when he realised he'd said that out loud.
“Whatever you wanna do, you need to do it before I decide I should run away.” You muttered, your hands resting on his clothed biceps.
Jisung hesitated slightly, closing the distance. His plush lips pushed against yours. The kiss was messy, years of yearning finally surfacing. It didn't last long, Jisung pulling away to rest his head on your shoulder. “You know what I hate?”
“What?” You asked, your heart racing and a hand settling on the back of his head.
“That they were right, Hanna and Haechan. All along. Everyone could see it except for us.” He laughed softly.
A soft laugh escaped you, “yeah…. Yeah I suppose they were. I still don't think we were flirting though. Ever.”
“I think I was. Maybe once or twice. A week” Jisung admitted playfully.
You hit his arm gently, “you had a girlfriend!”
“Mmm…. But she didn't really love me, did she?” He mumbled. “You always did.”
“And I always will” You whispered, pulling his head off of your shoulder and kissing him gently.
------------------------.⊹˖ᯓ★. ݁₊ ------------------------
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Pluto: :p ... a day late im sorry.... longest fic I've written to date tho thats gotta be a good excuse surely ❓️ I think I'd have liked to do a little more with this but i just could not stretch the plot any more, it would've gotten so repetitive. Anyway happy belated birthday ME :p sorry if there's any grammatical errors iiiiii have been so dizzy all day I cant bear to read over this anymore.
