On luz, camila and parenting of neurodigernce children
One of the frustrating things to come out of the recent owl house episode has been a conversation around whether Camila is a good parent.
Now this is frustrating because this framing flattens the real conversation that requires a degree of understanding and nuance. I understand why this reaction happens (the tendency for black characters to be vilified) but it also ironically removes all of the ways Camila might be an even better parent than you realise, if you are willing to dig a little deeper.
So Luz Noceda is a neurodigernce teen. This has been confirmed by the creator and reads as very true to me a neurodigernce adult. The series itself is often about being disabled in one way or another and figuring out how to make it work, Eda taking potions to stop turning into an owl beast being a perfect example of chronic pain. Her whole family dynamic defined by the failure to meet her needs.
All of this stuff leads into the most recent episode where Luz finally returns home. The whole episode is very revealing (if you look closely) at both the many ways Camila was a great parent, but also the ways she struggled to meet Luzs needs.
Now first up, the camp from episode 1. Now I don’t think that Camila sending her daughter to a neurodivergence conversation camp makes her bad. It would be bad as a thing, but there are many ways in which I could see why Camila would do this, all of them due to ignorance and powerlessness.
For starters, does Luz have a diagnosis. Getting a diagnosis is actually pretty hard, especially if you’re not a white cis boy. Camila is a black Latina woman who has both child services and ice to fear. With these circumstances, it makes complete sense for there to be no diagnosis and for Camila to understandably downplay what Luz struggles with. There’s also the fact that most places even with marketing like camp reality check, rarely advertise their horrible practices. Plus society treats neurodivergence like a disease, while horrible it makes sense that within this confusion a parent might put their kids through these circumstances because they just don’t know.
(As an aside, regardless of how the camp is in the show with the 3 other kids seeming fine. Most camps like these aren’t, and it’s perfectly reasonable to be suspicious. I also won’t go too deep here but Disney presenting places where neurodigent kids are sent to be fixed as totally fine is actually kind of dangerous. Please do not start telling me that the camp is actually fine, it is beside the point)
Anyhoo, within the episode it should also be noted that while Camila is protecting all of Luzs things, it also reads as holding on to the parts of Luz that might have been effected by a place that forcibly changed a neurodivergent child. Camila could be read as experiencing guilt for putting her child through that, hence the clinging at the end of the episode(which is obviously trying to keep her child safe but there are layers here).
For me overall, the problem Camila has is not a lack of love or care, cause she clearly loves and cares for Luz. It’s a question of needs. Every disability has its own needs, and it’s not necessarily anyone’s fault when there not met but if they’re not then there will be trouble, such as snakes and the like.
There’s also probably a need for Luz to have the talk every neurodigent person has to have if they want a healthy relationship with their parents. It’s a hard conversation because you need your parent to understand that regardless of intent, I have been hurt by your actions. I’ve had to do this at times with both my parents, it’s painful and scary(my mum is better, my dad is not). Most parents who hurt their neurodigent child aren’t intentionally doing this but society makes it almost inevitable, so it’s important to have the conversation.
If Luz and Camila were to have it when Luz is this young would actually be pretty incredible, cause most have it when they’re older and less dependant on their parent. This would in fact demonstrate that Camila is an amazing parent that is sadly quite rare.
That being said I’m not sure if the show will properly deal with these elements but I hope they do, cause a lot of neurodigent kids really do need the example. I’d like to see a generation of neurodivergence kids who don’t automatically experience this type of trauma.
