it's used, so yes. not that it was formally made a flag for it specifically yet.
transphoebian would be a term I guess. let me tag @neopronouns to know what he thinks of this term (or if he knows a word for that). comment: not sure if transphoebian would be exactly a better term for this, since I feel that transsolarian, for instance, would mean transtidal-aligned. transtidal includes those who are neither transmasc or trans man but are trans and masc or man in some way, for example.
Neutrosexual or neutralsexual has three definitions:
Sexual orientation that refers to individuals who put sexual desire in the background, and who relate to anyone regardless of sex, gender or sexual orientation, confused with asexuality, as the term originates as a synonym for someone indifferent to sex, and confused with pansexuality because it has elements in common, but with subtle differences.
A way of being, a condition to which a person relates to other people with subjective interests and not essentially carnal interests, which do not have a limit position of sexual attraction, the one who absorbs the sexuality of those who love or feel romantic affective connections.
It is the denomination of a being who expresses his sexuality through the spirit, loving others from within, sublimating carnal sexual genders of masculine and feminine. Your main ways of loving someone begin with the analysis of the personality that may have a vibration compatible with the spiritual nature of the other.
Flag by Alex Abneguer. Not to be confused with ninsexual or neusexual. Meaning source (link).
Description: Logan and Janus rescue a kitten on their first date :)
[Reposting this for better formatting on my writing masterpost]
gosh part of me wants to revisit this AU lol
-
“Well…I guess I'll see you later.”
“I would assume so. You do tend to frequent my place of employment rather consistently.”
Ouch.
Janus tried to hide his hurt as he smiled crookedly up at the cute barista that he'd only recently managed to work up the courage to ask out on a date. A crack of thunder rolled across the sky above them, and Janus watched as Logan pulled down the hood of his raincoat.
Crappy weather for a date.
Despite Logan's constant reassurances that he enjoyed the rain, Janus couldn’t help but feel that their date had been doomed from the start. He sighed and smiled. If he was being honest with himself, things could have gone worse. He knew he'd loved every minute of their afternoon together and he only hoped Logan felt the same. They’d had lunch at a quiet little bistro downtown that Logan had recommended and after they’d ran through the pouring rain down the block to one of Logan's favorite bookstores. A warm smile spread across Janus' at the fresh memory of following Logan through the aisles listening to him talk endlessly about all of his favorite authors. Logan could go on for hours and Janus was all too eager to listen. The way his face lit up when he was excited was too pure and perfect. He was perfect. Logan had even inquired about Janus’ reading preferences and picked out some novels for him to read so they could discuss them later.
Guess that doesn’t mean much though, if there's not going to be a second date.
Janus swallowed sadly. The date really had been perfect.
Why did I have to get invested?
He'd been debating about asking for him for months. Janus knew his schedule at the coffee shop by heart at this point. They’d been taking for nearly a year and his best friend had talked him into at least asking him out.
I'm going to kill Ro—
“I have some concerns about your caffeine intake. Continued reliance on stimulants can affect your mood and sleep patterns.” Logan absentmindedly pulled his keys from his pocket and worked through the keys to find the right one. Janus felt his heart skip a beat as Logan tilted his head up to smirk at him. “Then again, if it weren't for your dependence on caffeine, I would see you much less and that would be truly disappointing."
Janus stifled a squeak of surprise as flash of lightning illuminated Logan's porch. He played it cool, hoping the lightning had distracted Logan from the almost certainly undignified face he'd made at Logan's words. With a devilish smile, he took a step closer to Logan as thunder rumbled around them. “I definitely would never put my heath at risk in order to see you more often.”
This time it was Logan's turn to blush and Janus couldn't help the smile that quirked on his lips at the sight.
Logan cleared his throat, and fumbled with his keys. Janus raised an eyebrow. He seemed to be stalling, even as he moved to leave. “Well, umm. Yes. I suppose we should part ways for the night.”
Oh god. He wants me to kiss him.
A slight shiver ran up Janus' spine at the thought and his smile faltered for a moment. It wasn’t that Logan was an unattractive person. Quite the opposite actually. Janus often caught himself staring at Logan whenever he wasn't careful. Janus swallowed nervously. Logan wasn’t the problem. Aesthetically, he was very attractive. Janus just didn't wasn't the type for romantic attraction, or sexual really, but he'd always been more repulsed by romantic gestures than anything.
The hand-holding, sappy, over-the-top displays of affection that everyone in the world seemed to enjoy made his stomach turn. Kissing most of all confounded him. Why people seemed to enjoy trying to swallow each other’s tongues, he'd never know.
But they do and I don't. I guess it’s better to rip off the band-aid now and tell him I'm aromantic. It's better to see if he can live with that before this goes too far.
Janus swallowed nervously. Rejection was never easy, and he wasn't sure he could handle it coming from the barista who he'd seen nearly every day for the last year.
God, I'm never going to be able to get a decent cup of coffee again.
“Listen, Logan—” He started nervously.
Mew.
Janus stopped, seeing the confused expression on Logan's face. “Do you have a cat?”
Logan shook his head, glancing around the porch. “I do not.”
“It's pouring rain right now.” Janus glanced around at the puddles of water pooling in the shallow dips in Logan's yard.
Mewww.
The cat's call was longer this time and was almost shrill with fear.
“Perhaps, we should locate this cat. It appears to be distressed and combination of rain and wind could pose potential danger for a small animal.” Janus could see the worry growing in Logan’s eyes, and he nodded, following behind Logan as he stepped off the porch to follow the noise.
Mewwww.
The calls were getting louder and more insistent as they approached the far side of the deck and peered through the cross hatch underneath.
Mewwww.
Janus eyes adjusted quickly to the darkness under the deck and he could just make out a small, black kitten cowering in the shadows.
“It's young,” Logan looked over at Janus with a serious expression. “Barely old enough to be weaned. It must have squeezed through the gaps in the wood and gotten stuck.”
Janus nodded. “Well, since I'm definitely slender enough to slip through that gap, do you have a drill?”
Logan raised an eyebrow at him. “Are you going to take it apart?”
“What?” Janus smiled teasingly at him. “I don’t seem trustworthy?”
His coyness seemed to fall on deaf ears as nervous settled across Logan’s face. “Are you licensed?”
“No, but I know what I'm doing, and if we waste time trying to find someone with the proper qualifications, that kitten is going to be iintrouble.” Logan still looked wary, but Janus was quick to reassure him. “Trust me. I've done this several times before. It's just a couple of screws holding it in place. It'll pop right back on when I'm done.”
Logan nodded and Janus blushed at the subtle smile that appeared on his face. “Okay, I'll be right back.”
Logan stood up and went inside, leaving Janus squatting in the drizzling rain as he looked down at the little kitten shivering near one of the supporting posts.
“Hey there, little one.” He made a clicking noise with his tongue, trying to coax it closer. “It’s a little cold out here, huh?”
Mew.
“I know. We're going to get you out of there and find some place warm for yiu to stay. Okay?”
Mew.
Too his surprise, the kitten stood up, approaching him cautiously. Janus reached out a hand rubbing his fingers together and clicking. “Come on, buddy. Make this easier on us and just come out of there.”
Mew.
“How about you do me a solid and help me impress this cute boy I'm on a date with?”
Mew.
The kitten stopped just behind the crisscrossing wood and sat on the ground. Janus sighed and smiled. “Just like a cat to make things difficult.”
Mew.
“No? Nature itself would like me to fail?” Janus rolled his eyes. “That hardly what I ever would have expected."
Janus reached his fingers through the wood, but stopped as the kitten backed away cautiously. He waited patiently as the kitten relaxed. Janus could feel the rain dripping down his face as the cat sniffed his hand. Janus smiled as the whiskers tickled his hand. The cat rubbed its face on Janus' hand and allowed him to reach up to scratch it's chin. “See? I’m not a bad guy, right?”
Meewwww.
The cat whined as Janus pulled his hand out from the gap. “Well, come out then if you want more.”
Mew.
The kitten trailed behind his fingers and reluctantly pushed it head through the door. Janus picked it up, cuddling it close in his arms. The little, cat purred happily in his hands as he scratched his chin. He slowly stood up, just as Logan came around the corner, with a drill in one hand and a towel in the other. His shoulders dropped in surprise as he noticed the purring kitten in Janus' arms.
A subtle smirk appeared on Logan's face as the worry disappeared “I see you didn't actually require my assistance at all.”
Janus' heart fluttered with pride at the smile on Logan’s lips, but he forced himself to play it off nonchalantly. “I only needed a moment alone to work my magic powers.”
Logan smirked back at him. “Well, I will admit I am impressed.”
“Yes, it’s definitely that, and not at all the fact that you’re relieved that I don't have to take your deck apart.” Janus smiled smugly.
“I won’t deny that is preferential to the alternative, but I am impressed you seem to have all the have all the beauty and power of a Disney princess.” Logan narrowed his eyes playfully at him.
Great. At least I know Roman would approve.
Janus rolled his eyes. “Are we going inside then?”
Logan hesitated, suddenly nervous again. When he finally spoke, hos voice was friendly, but cautious. “I must admit I don't usually allow the men I date into my home on the first date."
“Yes, because I often plan to rescue a scared kitten in order to gain access to my date’s homes.” Janus immediately regretted his sarcasm as a look of discomfort crossed Logan’s face. “You know what? That wasn't fair, Logan. If you're uncomfortable, I’ll go. Do you want to take—"
Logan’s face softened quickly and he held up a hand to stop him. “You’re not going anywhere, Janus.”
Janus froze in confusion. “But you just said—”
“I know,” Logan smiled sweetly at him. “but these are hardly normal circumstance. You are helping me, and you’re soaking wet for your efforts. I think I can bend the rules for you. After all, you're hardly a stranger at this point.”
The corner of Janus' lips twitched into a smile and nodded as Logan led him around the front of his house. Stepping inside, he couldn't help but notice that the walls of the room were lined with unpacked boxes.
“Did you just move in?”
“Yesterday.” Logan slipped off his raincoat to reveal the dark blue button up and tie he'd come to expect with him.
“It's a nice place.” Janus glanced around. His home was small, maybe two bedrooms, but it was nicely painted and the dark leather sofa and end tables in the room were definitely high quality. The cloud cover outside dampened the natural light in the room, but a small lamp in the corner illuminated the room in a warm light. “Do you live alone?”
Logan raised an eyebrow at him.
Janus flushed, holding the sleeping kitten close to his chest. “Sorry. I suppose I it would have been wise to start with a less serial-killer-type question.”
Logan laughed and Janus couldn't help but grin stupidly at the smile on Logan’s face.
“I think I can find it in myself to overlook your red flags.” Logan opened one of the boxes and began to unload it's contents in neat piles on the floor. “I had a previous house mate, but he recently moved in with his boyfriend and I moved here.”
“That's rough. I suppose money's a bit tight then? I can't imagine you make enough as a barista to easily afford a place like this.”
Logan lifted the empty box with him as he stood up, giving Janus a strange look. “You are aware I own the coffee shop I work in, correct?”
“What?” Janus mouth dropped open as he nearly shouted in surprise. The kitten mewed irritably, and Janus dropped his voice. “Since when?”
“Since it's inception.” Logan shrugged as he put the shallow box on the sofa. “The previous roommate I mentioned and I actually own a few of them throughout town.”
Janus looked at him dumbfounded. “Is that why you won't let me tip you?”
Logan smiled at Janus’ shock and shrugged as he pulled a blanket off the back of the couch. He tucked the blanket into the box to make a makeshift bed for the kitten in Janus' arms. “It’s not customary to tip the proprietor of an establishment.”
“But you never said that was why.” Janus spat out. “You just played coy with me.”
Logan smirked at him and laughed. “I was… I believe the correct phrase is, ‘being a tease.’”
“Do you mean to tell me you've been flirting with me this entire time?”
“Clearly.” He stated plainly, but Janus could see the subtle smile tugging at his lips. His smile grew as he reached his hands out. “Now, give her to me.”
“Her?” Janus asked as he passed the kitten to Logan
“I'm fairly certain judging by her size and physical traits but…” The cat chirped in protest of being lifted out of the warm towel and he lifted her up to examine her. “She is female. Although I suppose the pronouns are arbitrary, considering cats are not familiar with human social construct of gender—”
“You’re trying to distract me from the fact that you flirted with me for a year, and as you can see, it's working flawlessly.” Janus crossed his arms and tried to look disappointed.
Logan merely rolled his eyes and tucked the kitten under his arm as he reached into an open box to grab a small towel. He gently massaged the dampness off the purring kitten in his hand as he continued speaking. “I think that I enjoy having the figurative tables turned. Usually it is I who is considered the oblivious party.”
“You mean to tell me I could have been dating you this whole time?” Janus put his hand on his forehead in dramatic, mock frustration. “Tragedy does strike at me yet again.”
“You have been quite the conversation at the coffee shop. If I'm not mistaken, there were even betting pools about when you were finally going to ask me out.” Janus blushed and Logan chuckled as the kitten started to climb his shirt. He carefully unhooked the kitten’s claws from his shirt and set her down in the box, and for a moment, they watched as the kitten began to knead the blankets, apparently enthralled by the soft material. Logan drew his eyes away and glanced up at him with a soft smile. “Personally, I'm glad you waited a while though. I prefer to know someone for some time before I consider them as a romantic partner.”
Logan’s voice was carefree as he reached down to stroke the kitten, but Janus heart sank as he was reminded of the potential deal breaker hanging over his head. “Logan…”
Logan's head shot back up at his serious tone.
“Come sit.” He gestured for Logan to join him on the couch. Janus sat on one side of the box and Logan slowly dropped onto to other side. He hung his head and was quiet for a while, hesitant to break their easy chemistry.
“Janus, if I have offended you in some way, I’m sorry—” Logan looked over at him with concern in his eyes.
“You didn't offend me.” Janus hung his head, anxiety building in his chest. He watched kitten twirl around in the box between them and drop into the blanket, laying her head on her tail as she settled in comfortably. “I just would prefer to have this discussion before either if us get too invested.”
Logan stared at him for a while, but nodded and waited patiently as Janus gathered his thoughts.
“Logan, I'm aromantic.” Janus looked up at him expecting disappointment, but was met with a confused expression.
“Well, yes. You smell very pleasant. I don't know what that has to do—”
“What?” Janus paused for a moment before the realization his him. “No. Not aromatic, Logan. Aromantic.”
Logan paused. “I'm sorry. I'm not familiar with the term.”
“Oh, right.” Janus hadn't considered that he may have to explain the concept. “Have you heard of the split attraction model?”
Logan looked at him curiously. “No.”
Janus smiled patiently at him. “It’s based on the idea that there are multiple types of attraction. Many people experience sexual and romantic attraction simultaneously so they consider them to be the same thing, but there's a spectrum of people who experience attraction differently or not at all., and I'm one of those people.”
Logan nodded contemplatively. “Okay.”
“I'm still questioning some of my identity. I assume I'm demisexual, which means I only find people attractive with whom I've formed a significant attachment. To be honest though, I've never been in a situation where I've put that theory into practice so to speak,” Janus sighed and hung his head. “But I know I'm aromantic.”
“Which means what exactly?” Logan inquired seriously, stroking the kitten between them.
“I don't experience romantic attraction.” Janus watched Logan's neutral expression as he explained. “I’m not drawn to people, because I want to be romantic or lovey with them. I don't like holding hands or sappy romantic gestures. The idea of kissing is repulsive to me. I just don't enjoy being part of that kind of relationship, because that kind of affection makes me uncomfortable.”
“So, you are just interested in the potential for sex?”
“No,” Janus’ face scrunched in disgust. “I'm not looking for that at all.”
“I’m sorry. I'm trying not to assume anything.” Logan paused and Janus could see the struggle to understand in Logan's face. “I'm just trying to figure out what your intentions for asking me out were, if they weren't due to some degree of attraction.”
Janus looked up at him, desperation in his eyes. “I am attracted to you in my own way. I enjoyed spending time with you and talking today. I like listening to you laugh or listening to tall excitedly about books. My attraction for you is real. It's just not romantic.”
Logan watched him carefully. “And you’re not just trying to tell me you just want to be friends?”
“No.” Janus said tiredly. His anxiety gave way to exhaustion. “I am interested in a committed relationship with you. I just don't want the type of relationship you see in a rom-com. I want to spend time with you rescuing cats and drinking coffee.”
Logan was quiet for a long time and Janus heart sank further and further with each passing second. He tried to swallow the lump in his throat, but he felt his heart shattering.
“So,” Logan spoke slowly. “You want to spend time with me. You want to be in a relationship, but you don't want to kiss me hold hands or be affectionate?”
Janus couldn't bring himself to look up at Logan’s face. “I'd be affectionate. It just manifests differently. Something like the thought of listening to you talk excitedly about the stars is more appealing to me that the thought of kissing you.”
Logan was silent, and Janus finally looked up at him. His hand had stopped moving on the kitten's back. Janus heart shattered at the downcast look on Logan’s face. He felt tears in his eyes.
Damn it. Why'd I get invested?
Rejection sucks.
He choked back a sob, and stood to leave. “I'm sorry. This is stupid—”
“Janus—”
“I'm sorry I wasted your time.” Janus turned to go, but Logan caught his wrist.
“Janus, stop.”
“Logan, if you don't want this, it's fi—” Janus’ words failed him as he turned to see tears in Logan’s eyes.
Logan looked down at where he held Janus' wrist before moving his gaze up to his eyes. “I’m sorry. I needed a moment to process what you were saying, I think… I think I may be aromantic too. I just lacked a word to define my feelings.”
Janus froze for a moment, but as Logan dropped his wrist, Janus turned to kneel in front of Logan. “Shit, I didn’t see that coming. I'm sorry. Are you doing okay?”
“I'm not the only one." Logan’s voice was breathless.
Janus' lip curled into a smile. “You're not alone, Logan.”
Logan sighed and he chuckled softly as he wiped the tears from his eyes. “I'm sorry. I’m not usually prone to being this dramatic.”
“You aren't being dramatic.”
“Is that one of your blatant falsehoods that you hide under the guise of sarcasm?” Logan sniffed, but Janus could see a smile twitch on his lips.
“No, I've never been so truthful about anything in my life.” Janus reached a hand out and rested it on Logan's forearm. “Society puts pressure on us to live a certain way. The release of knowing there are other options can be a lot to handle.”
“I never even considered there may be alternatives.” Logan ran a hand through his hair and Janus couldn't resist smiling as Logan mussed his own hair. Seeing Logan let his guard down made his heart flutter. “I simply accepted that I would be slightly uncomfortable in my relationships.”
“You don't have to do that,” Janus smiled up at the him nervously. “especially if I get a part in your journey.”
“Janus?”
“Yes, Logan?” Janus gently squeezed his wrist.
“May I hug you?”
“Yes. I’m certainly not dying for you to do just that.”
Janus stretched his arms out and a warm feeling flooded his chest as Logan pulled him close.
“Thank you, Jan."
Janus' heart fluttered at the nickname and he smiled. “For what?”
“For giving me a word to explain what I've been feeling.”
“I'm glad I could help you.” Janus pulled back as Logan released him. His breath caught in his throat at the sight of Logan’s warm smile and the wet streaks of happy tears glistening on his face. “Can I assume you’re still interested in continuing to see me then?”
“God, yes.” Logan's face flushed and he nervously backtracked. “I mean, if that would be favorable to you.”
“God, yes please.” Janus laughed. His face was almost sore from how wide he was smiling as he wiped away the tears that were now falling freely down his face. Logan laughed and Janus would have sworn that sound to be the most beautiful thing he’s ever heard.
Mew.
Janus tore his eyes away from Logan to look down the tiny, black cat crawling to the edge of the box. Realizing she was close to edge, he reached out to stop her, but his reaction was a moment too slow. With a tumble, the kitten fell over the edge of the box and landed softly in Logan’s lap. Janus leaned back on his ankles, watching Logan smile as he stroked the kitten in his lap. She purred loudly, bumping her head insistently against Logan’s hands in demand for more attention.
“What are you going to do with her?”
Logan looked up at Janus with a sad smile. “She is well taken care of a shows indications of prior human socialization, so I expect I should attempt to find her owner.”
Janus smirked, seeing the growing fondness in Logan's eyes as he looked down at the satisfied kitten. “And if you can't find her owner?”
“I have always desired the companionship of a cat. They're exceptionally clever creatures, but I never had the opportunity because my previous housemate was allergic.” Logan looked up at Janus with a sparkle in his eye. “So, if attempts to find her owner are unsuccessful, you may have just given me the perfect house-warming gift.”
“Good, because I want to give you everything.” Janus smiled happily and his heart felt light in his chest as he stared into Logan’s eyes.
Physiogender: tied to physics/physicalities (prefixed variants: physicogender/physigender/fisigender/fisiogender/fisicogender).
Chemicogender: tied to chemistries/alchemies (chemiogender/chemogender/chemigender/alchemigender/alchemiogender/alchemicogender/quimicogender/quimogender/quimiogender/alquimiogender/alquimogender/alquimicogender/alquimigender/alchemogender).
Lingogender/letrogender/lettrogender/glossogender/lexicogender/graphigender (linguogender/graphogender/graphicogender/grafogender/graficogender/grafigender/grafiogender/graphiogender): tied to lingo/languages/grammar/glossary/lexicons/linguistics/graphies(spellings/graphs)/graphics/letrology/glossolalia/lettrology.
Visiogender/visogender: tied to vision/visionary things/views.
