#night musing

[shadowcarnivalen]

After that stream I want to say "You shouldn't be nervous or scared to talk to me or try to befriend me." ....... man I wish I could take my own advice though lol.

[live-ur-blissful-life]

night musing...wow

You have 100 billion neurons in your brain...give or take a few billion.

How f****ing insane is this world???!!!

[yelled-at-by-humanity]

I find my own interest in the universe and the ocean fascinating because I don't think there is anything in this world I'm more afraid of than those two things

[artemis69]

Tonight, I’ve been thinking about the scenes where the Sheriff discovers everything.  With A first reveal, Stiles roughly explaining that, yes, creatures of the night exist and that, no, they don’t have that many mountain lions in Beacon Hills. And after all the angst and Stilinski’s feels, I want the Sheriff to summon everybody in his living room to learn everything.

 So you know, the pack is sprawling all over his house, eating an indecent amount of food and obediently showing their teeth and wolf faces like docile puppies at a pet show. Because you just know that in a little town like that, they grew up respecting the hell of their Sheriff.

And they explain everything, and they all boisterously add their own details to every fact. There stories are still scripts straight from a horror movie, but between the bickering and the laughs, everything seems less awful.

 Then, hours later, I want the Sheriff to send everybody home.

 Except Derek.

  And of course, you know Derek. He would wait for everybody to leave, looking at the floor and just waiting for the axe to fall. Because he knows he ruined these kids’ lives. He knows people died because of him. He knows that he’s the one to punish there.

 (He hopes the Sheriff doesn’t know about the way he feels about his underage son tho. Now the Sheriff knows he just have to coat his bullets with wolfsbane to be efficient).

 So Derek is fidgeting, and the Sheriff makes him sit in front of him and he doesn’t have his gun so. Derek is optimistic.

 But I only want the Sheriff to ask him:

 “Are you ok son?”

“Do you want to press charges?”

“Do you feel safe?”.

 Because the Sheriff is a good man, and a good father, and a good cop. And I want him to collect the little details of Derek’s life scattered in the middle of the whole story. He’s trained to hear people talk and pick up patterns and hidden stories.

 So he hears about Kate and the fire and Laura and Peter and Kate again and kidnapping and electricity and Scott and Gerard and Braeden.

And he hears rape and minor and murders and manipulation and authority figures and a kid whose free will has been stolen again and again.

 Because you know what? I just want, for once, someone to realize that twenty something it’s still so fucking young, and that the claws and leather jacket shouldn’t mean he doesn’t get protected.

  So I want to read about the Sheriff sitting there for a long time, and trying to learn more but never prying too much because Derek’s choices have been stolen for too long. I want the Sheriff to say that yes, Derek made mistakes. But that doesn’t mean he shouldn’t have been protected. That he had the right to be protected. And I want him to explain that what Kate did, what Peter did, what Braeden did to him where wrong. That what Scott did was wrong. That hey were not mistakes he made, but choices that were taken from him.

 I want him to say that he’s sorry.

  And of course Derek would just try to flee as soon as possible, because it’s Derek. So he would run away with a mumbled thanks and the Sheriff’s number in his phone.

 But I want the Sheriff to go talk to Scott the next day. And to explain that taking somebody’s right to choose will always be something wrong, that should not be brushed away. And then go talk to Chris Argent, and reminds him that adults should not threaten kids just because they have the power to. To reminds him that Derek Hale, despite the whole frowny and werewolf thing, is a victim from his sister, and that the less this family could do would be to stop threatening him when they need something.

 And then, when Derek and Stiles starts tentatively dating.

 I want the Sheriff to not do any shovel talk, even when Stiles jokes about it. Because so many people used their link with Derek to hurt or threaten him, and he refuses to be on the list. And he never treats Derek as broken, but he still takes the time to sit Stiles down and talk about not pressuring people and respecting boundaries. That Stiles should never do something he doesn’t want to, but also that he shouldn’t take older, more experimented or tougher as automatic permissions. That staying quiet doesn’t mean yes.

 And when Stiles and Derek stay together, and Derek and the Sheriff grow closer.

 I want the Sheriff to always wait for permission before entering Derek’s personal space. I want him to be careful of his jokes. I want him to install a brand new fire alarm in Stiles and Derek’s flat, and to show to Derek how it works perfectly, room after room. I want him to, somehow, never do barbecues when they meet because he hates Derek’s face when he smells smoke. I want him to tell his new deputies to back off when they hit on Derek and touch him every time he comes into the precinct to bring a meal to the sheriff.

  I just. I need a Sheriff that understands that, yes, Derek is not perfect. But that he’s so, so young.

 And that he should have people in his corner to protect him, because for so long nobody has.

[lavender-and-nightshade]

What If?

I cannot force a reconciliation and I don’t even know if that is what I want. This is what it comes down to... I miss him. I hate saying it but I do. I don’t know how much he would be willing to put up with me and my willingness to amend things . I in no way see him as a romantic partner but he was my friend above everything else. I wanted so much for him and I still do and I hope he knows that. He let me go so I could find happiness as he knew it would not be with him and I in turn found that happiness and want nothing but happiness for him. It makes me sad to think back on how much he has hurt me but i wonder how much did I hurt him? We were all in this circle of hurt and pain. I now know that falling in love with someone is not painful it is welcomed and while what happened between us was painful I realize that we were only capable of feeling so much. So what If tomorrow we start over or what if he wants nothing to do with me? I don’t want to contribute to this anxiety anymore. 

[addams-beineke]

I know some people see having a hyphen in their URL as being like second-best to the URL without the hyphen, but mine was completely intentional. My URL is Addams-Beineke as in Wednesday Addams-Beineke, so my URL is her actual (possible but probable) last name, and I am damn proud of it.

[onlytalia]

of course if anyone has experience in

complete and utter betrayal

it's Talia

oF COURSE it's not been complete and utter more like complicated and conflicted but she does it anyway because the heart wants what it wants and God knows what Talia's wants

but srsly Ra's is surprised EVERY TIME

Bruce not so much

BUT RA'S IS

[tinkeroftime]

If you could live beyond time, not standing against it, what would you let yourself do, your feet go, which places would you go to first, even though you never have been there before?