DOA trio Sleeping/Cuddling Headcanons
Divider by @selysie
Summary: How the DOA trio men are like when sleeping/cuddling.
Contains: Fluff, sfw, kind of silly and crack, Fyodor is kinda toxic(this is Fyodor we're talking about ya'll), Nikolai being Nikolai, mentions of Nikolai trying to suffocate you with a pillow, mentions of Nikolai trying to (affectionately) kill you, Nikolai's shenanigans, Manga spoilers, guns, knives etc.
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Fyodor Dostoevsky
• Does bro even sleep tho-
• He barely sleeps and usually like, really late at night. He's smart so he obviously realizes that as a human, he has to sleep.
• But here's the thing, you'll never see him when he gets in bed nor notice it. Even if you stay up all night out of curiosity, you will not notice this rat. Picture this: you're lying awake, trying to notice when Fyodor comes in. You blink and BAM- bro is in bed and you did not notice when. What's more is that he's looking at you like the picture above.
• Bro is judging heavily, but he's also mildly amused. You might or might not get jumpscared by how sudden it was, that depends on you.
• Oh yeah, he's anaemic, so obviously he didn't move so fast that you didn't notice. He just sneaked up on you. And entered secretly through a secret entrance that exists because, well, it's Fyodor. What else do you expect.
• If you ask him about it, he'll just talk in riddles like always and just smile his mischievous rat smile.
• Now, about cuddling, he's not exactly a very cuddly person. And you know how he sneaked up on you to get in bed without you noticing? I know for a fact he won't be able to cuddle you as stealthily. I headcanon that bro is cold af. He might not be cuddly but I know for a fact he randomly sneaks and trails his fingers/hands across your body at random to get a reaction from you. Argue with the wall, you cannot convince me otherwise.
• He's polite and refined so obviously he won't touch you in a perverse way, but he'll just randomly start trailing his cold ass fingers on your arm or spine to mess with you. He knows he runs cold and he is going to take advantage of that.
• He might cuddle you to get warmer, or because he just feels like it. He'll honestly treat you like some kind of cuddly pet, like a cat. He'll hold you and brush his fingers through your hair while mentioning how clingy you are.
• If you really wanna cuddle, he might let you sit on his lap and straddle and cuddle him. Given that you won't bother him.
• Bro would honestly just want you to sit on his lap like some obedient pet; I honestly don't think he'll be able to love someone like a person. He might see you as some kind of prize or pet, he's way too possessive and controlling to be healthy. But if you're into that ig you'll be fine?
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Nikolai Gogol
• Did you seriously think you could sleep when he's nearby?
• Cmon guys, this is Nikolai we're talking about.
• Bro will NOT let you sleep. You, Dazai and Fyodor are gonna become the insomniac trio with this one. Neither of you get any sleep, either because of Nikolai, sleep problems, or you're just busy planning world domination.
• Like maybe if he's feeling extra nice he might let you sleep. Still maximum 5-6 hours.
• He's going to be brushing your face with bird feathers and giggling maniacally as he does. He might trail knives and guns to get more of a reaction.
• Don't worry, he's not trying to kill you. Or is he?
• We will never know but sleep with your eyes open. I mean, we kinda do know, Nikolai tried to kill Fyodor because he thought his freedom would be limited. But at the same time he was kinda sad when he thought he died. So, uhhhh, yeaah😃😃.
• He once tried to (affectionately) suffocate you with a pillow. Moral of the story: Sleep with your eyes open if you can even sleep that is.
• And all of the sudden, Nikolai is being really sweet and is cozily tucked into the bed, eagerly waiting for you to get in. And obviously, you're suspicious, because what is this demonic jester up to this time?
• He begins coax you into getting in bed, cheerfully assuring you that nothing's wrong. liar
• And when you finally get in he quite literally snatches you, wraps himself around you and starts to roll around and giggle psychopathically. You are now trapped, best of luck trying to get out.
• As for cuddling in general, he's not really picky on who spoons who. He does prefer to be cuddled though. He'll just randomly teleport over to you and stuff his face in your chest.
• He does NOT care what gender you are or whether you have badonkers or not. He WILL stuff his face into your chest.
• The question isn't whether he's the big or small spoon, the question is when will he let you sleep peacefully without interruption, and if he'll ever stop trying to kill you.
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Sigma
• I just realized that 2/3 of DOA trio doesn't get any sleep. It's probabaly not canon, but think about it. He runs a casino, he's busy and stressed out. I feel like he has dark eye circles.
• As much as he looks like someone who'd love some sleep, cuddles and comfort, he does not get enough of it. He gets to bed really late at night, and he can't even sleep and cuddle for that long as he has to get up early💔💔. #Sigmadeservessleep
• He'd try his best to not wake you up when he gets in bed, and then he'll start snuggling against you for some comfort.
• If you're still awake please ask him about his day and tell him that he did great, it's written in the guidebooks that he'd love it if someone said that he did a great job💔.
• I feel like he'd be a little spoon; after a hard day of work, all he wants is to be cuddled and given princess treatment.
• He'd sleepily grumble about problematic clients while snuggling cozily against you.
• He reluctantly gets out of bed in the morning, no matter how much he just wants to stay in bed he'll have to go. He has a casino to run after all.
• If it's day off, he'll probably spend most of his time in bed cuddling with you. Until Nikolai breaks in to terrorize him.
• You cannot convince me otherwise, Nikolai would annoy Sigma to an inch of his life.
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