Any non binary people who dont look androgynous but look like both a man and a woman?
I have facial hair. I have long, styled hair. I have a very curvy body for being AMAB. But I also have big shoulders.
With my mask on, or from behind, everyone thinks I am a woman. And I prefer this.
But I dont want to shave. I dont want to take hormones. I am comfortable in my body, I like being a nonbinary woman and its taken me a long time and a lot of pain to learn how to love my physical body.
But you know what fucking sucks?? I like to have sex!!
And I am simultaneously "too masc" or "too fem" for everyone.
"You'd be hot if you cut your hair."
"You look great babe but you wont shave your face for me?"
"You're cute but if you're fem you should be smooth"
"Can you like put your hair up in a baseball cap or something?"
All things that have been said to me. I like lipstick and I like my facial hair. I like to wear dresses with my unshaved legs. I like to wear delicate things over my big shoulders.
WHY AM I EXPECTED TO PRESENT AS ONE BINARY OR ANOTHER WHEN THESE PEOPLE KNOW I AM NON BINARY??? Why does body hair invalidate femininity???
I know a lot of trans people experience issues like this, but a lot of this feels specific to being AMAB and non binary. Even my trans friends (out of a place I think of kindness) keep encouraging me to physically transition or use hormones, even though I tell them I like my body the way it is.
I always thought I HAD to be a man because I didnt want to undergo SRS. It wasnt until college I realize I had resigned to live as a man my whole life, and it had ruined me. I realized being trans, being non binary, means I get to decide what to do with my body.
And I dont need to be accepted by others, but its hard. When you are a sexual person and so many people tell you - You would be beautiful IF- it just sucks being stuck between binaries and always being too much of one thing or too little of another.
