Hey, I think I might be drinkin a bit of the genderfluid if you catch my drift. I was curious about your self-discovery and what you found out about it. You do not have to respond but it might help if you did. Thank you, Sash.
Hello there Sash! İf my words can help you even just a little bit i would be glad to tell you about my experiences ✨
İ am now very very comfortable about my genderfluidity, but discovering that wasnt that much comfortable.
Actually it was pretty hard for me.
Since my middleschool i was the "im not like the other girls" kid. İ never knew why, i just knew i different and actually i was pretty okay with that.
But in highschool, i started to question why i was different. First i discovered and came out as bi and i was expecting like "Okay that was why i thought i was different now i can continue being normal because being bi is normal"
Ho boy how wrong i was. İ wasnt like other bi girls either?
The thing was sometimes i really wished i looked other boys. Without the curvy body i have. İ was mostly jealous of their flat chests. İ was jealous of not accepted into boys friend groups because well i wanted to be like them. Not in just being masculine way. İ even felt i would be more comfortable with being feminine if i had a male body.
That made me thought maybe i was a trans boy.
And sometimes i was feeling so distant of all other people. "boys are like that" "all the girls are like that" and i was "No im not like any of them". İn these times i neither wanted to be seen as girl or boy. İ was even saying "im a dragon"
That made me thought maybe i was an enby.
And also sometimes i was very comfortable in my body, dressing like a fairy sometimes, feeling very girlboss, like i was so okay with that. Good chest good hips, i was asking myself why i was not liking myself like that.
And that made me thought maybe i was just a girl i was born as.
Not being able to understand if i was a boy enby or girl made me feel like i was faking it. Because how i feel was changing all the time. İ didnt think that was normal and maybe im just looking for attention. That was why understanding that i was genderfluid was so hard.
İ went through other genders and their gender dysphorias to understand its just changing.
When i understand its not me not fitting in any of gender identities its just my gender changing, then i understand i am genderfluid.
İ cant even explain how relieved i was. Because again, i found out im fitting in something, even not in all society.
To understand if youre genderfluid or not, all you need to think is if your gender changes or not. Just this. No "but"s. Genderfluid is also an umbrella term, it has mini terms under it and they can be more spesific than genderfluid so looking at them also helps if you have "but"s about genderfluidity.
İ hope i did clear somethings in your mind, if you have anything to share or ask please dont hesitate to reach to me again
İ hope your gender discovery will be more comfortable than mine 💜