#oneliners

[leukespreuk]

Er zijn twee soorten mensen wanneer ze succes hebben:

De één bouwt muren. De ander zet extra stoelen neer.

Deze spreuk raakt, omdat hij herinnert aan iets wat we soms vergeten: overvloed groeit wanneer je deelt.

Wat bouw jij?

Leuke mooie uitspraken en grappige gezegden over vriendschap, het leven en allerlei andere onderwerpen. Uitspraken, spreuken en gezegdes geg

#quote #inspiratie #levenswijsheid #samen #persoonlijkegroei

[mentalitynotes]

Like for a ONE LINER starter.

You can pick a muse, get one randomly or I'll pick one that's appropriate (looking at you fandom characters)

[mistfunk]

Mistigram: this newschool #ASCIIart logo for the Oneliners door at Juice BBS was drawn by The Iconoclast and included with the Mistigris World Tour stop with Fistful of Steel in the FOS-0197 artpack collection released 29 years ago this month.

[thelordstears]

15 lines of dialogue

This man is a despicable, evil piece of shit. But he is funny, which is all that matters, right? I want you guys to meet a man who thinks God is his father with a hunting rifle. That may as well be what God is, a great hunter stomping through the woods. This man hunts people for sport, taunts them, and laughs along side his best friend in the whole wide world. Meet Luther Woolhaun!

1 "Well, I'd give you a big speech about how much you deserve this, but I think you're a joke, so I'll treat your death like one. Asta la vista bitch!"

2 "You thought you were so goddamn mighty, thought you were one of the lions, one of the fuckin' big cahunas. But holy shit, you're nothing. You're less than nothing. Women'll be sleepin' easier without you around."

3 "You're just like all those animals in there. A hollow fuckin' husk of somethin' that died a long time ago."

4 "Fuck, if only we could find a fuckin' squirrel. Strangle it to death for all I care, eat it goddamn raw. Goddamn it. Fuck."

5 "It's thrilling. Blood on the hands, does not stain the way they claim it does. Blood on our hands, it proves we have what it takes, plus, feels nice to stick it to God."

6 "Ego. That's all I fucking hear when words tumble uselessly out'a your mouth. Anyone who thinks themselves justice couldn't bare to look at its fucking face. Justice is bigger then you and me, so, much, bigger. It is not as measly as a man with a knife who thinks he can escape the hourglass by playing its hand."

6 "Piss blood, fuck wad."

7 "Think we'll gut that fuckin' boy toy'a yours. See how well you fight on grief's terf."

8 "Aw, gonna cry? Gonna beg? Gonna pray? None of it's gonna save ya."

9 "Oh cut it with the whole, honor this, honor that speech. You only believe in that because you're gonna die, and you wanna be remembered as a brave little hero who did all he could. But were just a little wabbit, shot dead in the dark."

10 "This wimp taught you that? Are you fucking joking?"

11 "Oh am I? Am I really? Way I see it, I'm one of the special few, who earned his way to this position. To gut, and stab and murder whoever I damn well please! Who are you, to judge? I heard you in that cell, prattling on about death like you wanted to fuck her senseless, I mean I've never heard someone so goddamn suicidal! So accept it, pathetic little lamb, this is the end you've been waiting for."

12 "Ooo, you wanna dance?? Let's dance!"

13 "Oh, wishes, wishes. Just a way for wabbits to pass the time'a day."

14 "I watched him steal time as my conscience danced between the lines in his pocket watch."

15 "Oh lord knows I'm a hungry creature."

[thelordstears]

15 lines of dialogue

Today we're gonna go with a man who's only goal is to spread discord among the villain's, that and to find his long lost lover. He's a detective, he'd kill anybody who messes with his plan, he's tired of sticking to the law, he'll do what it takes to see justice seen through, even if it means tossing his morals to the side, some days. He's tired, he needs a drink, maybe three, and his name is Jack Crowley.

1 "Well, I'm not going to shoot you unless you give me a good enough reason. Of course, you know my name, and we've never met. Why is that?"

2 "I assume you two are related, both your last names are Blake. Some might call me a detective."

3 "I've been busy my entire life. Eventually, it gets on your nerves."

4 "So convince him the others don't value his work. Maybe make him think the others are all trying to scrabble for a finger on the fist, and that if he's not careful he won't make the cut."

5 "Your tongue must taste like salt. Cause you take everything with a grain of it."

6 "My capacity for intelligence would scare you if your brain had the room for complex thought."

7 "Her actions will prove either her stupidity or her cuteness, and that is all we know."

8 "You look like Bambi."

9 "Power's a shifting hand. You should've known that."

10 "For what it's worth, you're one cog out of place among many. Be proud, you're a step towards bashing Viallo's head against the wall."

11 "I've been around dead bodies my whole life. You learn to treat them more like a case than a person over the many hard years of treating every body like a person with memories, and loved ones, and favorite haunts. You joke, you laugh, you smoke. Anything to make it feel less real. That way, the dead don't haunt you the same way they do the living, because you sit on some, odd line between."

12 "I'm trying to fish out what the fuck you're here for. You gonna tell me or do one of us have to get shot before the talking starts?"

13 "I prefer a gun. Quicker. Less personal. I'll kill you with a knife if you fuck with me though."

14 "I know that he's a very strict man. A man who needs to have control of every meticulous detail of his life, like he needs to have it all lined up, almost like a director lining out his scenes shot by shot. He's a military man, of course, he thrives under pressure because he knows he won't be broken under its fist, and he's been framed for the murder of Vance Henshaw," he shrugged, "We'll see if that sticks."

15 "That's the world, my friend. A never ending revolving door of shit to get done."

[bytetrending]

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[dailylaughmania]

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[thelordstears]

15 lines of dialogue

Today I introduce you to a more wholesome character. He's a good man, but he's caught in a war he didn't start. All he wants is to keep his sanctuary of good people safe, mostly consisting of single parents and their grown children. He's a pastor, he can be a bit snarky at times, and he's an old man who just likes his tea. I hereby introduce you to Father Hornwood

1 "I don't believe a word that falls off your serpent's tongue, Viallo. You couldn't hold back the flood. You are not God. You are not the martyr nor are you the angel of flaming blade. You are a serpent, and you mean to deceive."

2 "Let me tell you how this is going to go. I imagine many lives will end. Blood will spill. That is the nature of war. Man cannot escape that fact as he cannot escape the fact that one day, he is going to die. But I'm okay with that, because I know where I'm going when I'm gone. I will never, bow to you, is that understood? You can beat me, and break me, you can even kill me, but in my last moments I will not give you the satisfaction of a head bowed in worship. Because whatever you think of the world, I know the opposite. Yes, fighting back gets you killed. It leads way to the blood of good and honest people, shot dead against the gravel, basking in that last morning sun. But that is a price we are all willing to pay. It is a price you have put on our shoulders, a choice you have forced us to make. I will not become what you think is the best suit of armor to wear around your fragile skin. I will do what it takes, Viallo, to rid this world of your stain. And trust me, that is not a choice I take lightly. But it is a choice I have made nonetheless. This road you're walking, will end with a muzzle flare and an eternity of fire. I wish hell was empty, but men like you tell me that it is not."

3 "Oh I know politics. I don't know if you knew this but I paid a lot of attention to the world's going abouts."

4 "You're just a very small man casting as large a shadow as he is able, and you've decided it fun to play God. But I will not bow my head to you. I will not worship every word that falls from your mouth. Because I do not worship false idols, and that is what you are, Viallo. A false idol."

5 "You can drop your hand, I'm not shaking it."

6 "Don't go drinkin' all my tea while I'm having my chat."

7 "Rock on."

8 "Wasn't my kind'a music, but I could appreciate the thought that went into it."

9 "I'm not sure I know how to respond to that."

10 "What matters is that during this dark time, they know that you did everything you could. That you didn't passively observe as the cruel stole them away. And son, I promise you, they will pay for the damage they have wrought against your siblings and the damage they have wrought upon this sanctuary."

11 "This is not the end, and God is not yet calling you home."

12 "Let us be living proof that we stand stronger together, that we'll always, stand stronger together. We are blessed, to even be standing here today, as strong as the day we first met. To know that we are each in the hand of a sister, or a brother, or a mother, or a father, knowing, with certainty, that there is always somebody to catch you when you fall or throw a punch at that which threatens to break you."

13 "I could only keep them from climbing on the walls for so long."

14 "If you don't mind my saying, this hostility won't do you any favors around here."

15 "My brother used to tell me that smoking was what kept him from putting a gun in his mouth, so, to each their own I suppose."