Tags/Warnings: PTSD, Angst, Canon Divergence, they’re both trying so hard
Written for @femslashfeb
The first time it was suggested to her, Jo shrugged off the idea. It seemed—weird. And she’s weird enough, thank you very much. But with some gentle nudging from her therapist and reframing of everything… it has become, “why not?” There is a ball of trauma-gunk inside her desperate to slither out. She’s avoided it for too long. It’s festering, consuming all the good and has left behind nothing but pain, rot, and ruin.
Jo is so tired. And she’s ready to feel something, anything else.
“Take as long as you need,” Charlie says, quiet and ever-present. Jo doesn’t think she’s ever seen or heard Charlie be this careful but she appreciates it deep down, even if her first instinct is to say “don’t” or “I’m fine.”
Jo isn’t fine. She hasn’t been fine in a long time. Ever since—
No.
No, it’s been longer than that. The demon that wore Sam’s face just demolished any pretense that everything was okay.
Jo inhales sharply. Tries to slow her body down. The frantic fluttering in her throat, the drums in her chest. You’re alive. She wishes it were comforting but she’s not very attached to the concept, yet.
Charlie’s car smells like stale burritos and those cheap little car fresheners you hang from the rearview mirror. It’s starting to make Jo sick. Most things make Jo sick these days, though. She turns in her seat, fumbles for the baseball bat, then slides out of the car, gasping. Her legs wobble and she breathes in, out. In, out. As slow as she can. Pays attention to the wind tickling her bare arms. “Fuck.”
“Should I grab the eggs?” Charlie calls after her and Jo winces.
“Yeah… I don’t know. Maybe?” Her grip tightens on the bat, the veins in her hands on display from the sheer effort. Jo decides that she can’t wait. She sprints thirty feet to the nearest tree, swings, and hears a crack as her blow lands. Fear chokes her and takes over, leaving her as nothing but a passenger, taking her back to—before.
Jo hits the tree over and over, letting out a feral scream. There is a voice calling to her from the edges of reason but she won’t turn back. She can’t stop.
**
They sit together in the grass afterwards, close enough their thighs are touching. Jo tries to smile. It’s a bit too watery, too painful. But Charlie accepts it, accepts her. “Thanks,” she finally says.
“No one should have to do this alone,” Charlie says. “I’m glad I came.”
Jo tilts her face towards Charlie, feeling a surge of happiness. She reaches up and cups Charlie’s cheek. Watches as Charlie melts against her hand. “Can I—”
“God, I thought you’d never ask,” Charlie murmurs, and then Jo straddles Charlie’s lap. They kiss, they breathe in each other’s air, they ask with their bodies and take only what’s freely given.
The rhythm of Jo’s heart matches Charlie’s as trust engulfs her. For a fleeting moment, she’s at peace.
Tags/Warnings: Mention of cancer remission/healing, sexual inexperience, canon divergence/alternate canon, dreamwalking
Written for @femslashfeb.
A gift for @nooowestayandgetcaught. Also tagging @oddsocksandstuff and @rosemoonweaver because reasons.
“Who are you?” Layla asks the fairytale-pretty redhead. This isn’t the first time she’s seen her flitting about Layla’s head, she’s been haunting Layla’s dreams for weeks. Ever since she stopped praying for a miracle and truly accepted her fate. It wasn’t that she didn’t believe, it was that—maybe it just wasn’t her purpose, maybe her life was meant to be short. And she was okay with that, she’d been coping—
“Don’t worry about that. You, though. Layla Rourke. You’re important.”
Layla’s skin prickles. Her hair stands on end. Her head feels—odd. “No more than anyone else.”
“You have work to do.” The woman invades Layla’s space, her eyes stealing Layla’s breath. Old; wise. Intense and otherworldly. “You need to live.”
“I don’t understand.”
“It’s okay.” The woman smiles. She doesn’t ask. She touches Layla with soft, gentle hands. Presses their foreheads together. It’s intimate. In a way Layla’s never experienced.
“Can I see you again?” It’s the most selfish she’s ever been and she’s not sorry. “I don’t want you to go.”
“I am here, always. Watching over you.”
Layla shivers. Pulls back the slightest bit but it’s only so she can kiss the woman’s temple. “Tell me your name. Please.”
“Anna.” The red-haired beauty entwines their fingers and warmth unfurls itself in Layla’s chest. “My name is Anna.”
“Anna,” Layla says, tasting her name. “I hope this is real. I hope you’re real.”
Anna opens her mouth to answer but they’re interrupted by Layla waking up, grinning from ear to ear.
**
“I’m better,” Layla blurts as soon as Anna appears in her dreams again. “The doctor’s say it’s as if the brain tumor was never there.”
Anna nods. “And it will stay that way.”
“You did this,” Layla says. “You healed me.”
“I did.”
Layla stares. “So. You said—you said I have work to do. What exactly does that entail?”
“Only you can know what is worth doing, Layla. I can’t decide it for you.”
“I don’t want to be without you ever again,” Layla says, reckless. She means it.
“I told you, I—”
“Yes, you’re always with me. But I don’t get to see you. I want to. I need to see you,” Layla says, gripping Anna’s shoulders. “Don’t you want to see me? Up close? We could—we could do anything.” She blushes at the significance of those words, how true they are. How bold.
“This would make you happy?” Anna asks. There are wheels turning behind those big eyes. Layla’s almost afraid of what they might see. Almost.
“It would. I can’t even begin to tell you how much.”
“Then it’s done. I’ll find the time.”
Layla thought finding out she was cancer-free would be her happiest moment, seeing the relief on her mother’s face. Oh, the celebrations they’d had that day.
But it’s not her happiest. It’s this; now. It’s knowing she’ll see Anna again. In the flesh.
**
They’re at the park near Layla’s home. Far too old to be here without children in tow but Anna has no shame. She pushes Layla on the swing and it’s all kinds of nostalgic. It reminds Layla of a simpler time. Girlhood excitement, wonder, and crushes. There had been a part of her, even then, that knew she wasn’t straight.
She’d never had a reason to act on those feelings, though.
Until now.
“You’re so gorgeous,” Layla sighs out. Maybe she’d have more tact once upon a time. But she used to be dying and now she’s not. It’s done something dangerous to her.
Anna hums. “As are you.”
“I don’t think you mean it the way I mean it,” Layla says, laughing awkwardly.
“How do you mean it?”
Layla stretches out her legs, stopping the swing. Tilts her head back slightly so she can catch Anna’s gaze. “I’m really attracted to you. I think a part of me always knew that I’m a lesbian. I never felt like saying it before. But you… make me want to scream it. I don’t care anymore. I don’t care what people might say.” She says it all way too fast. But if she didn’t do it now, she might never do it. And Anna deserves to know.
Anna drops a kiss on her forehead. As lovely as ever. “I’ve watched you for some time. I know who you are. I love you more because of it.”
Layla doesn’t know for sure what this means. She’s not even sure Anna’s human. How could she be? But Layla isn’t scared. She knows, deep down, that Anna is good. Whatever else she might be seems rather unimportant. Anna’s here for a reason. They met for a reason. It’s up to Layla to decide what to do about it.
They're sitting on a porch swing with comfortable cushions the color of Anna's silky red hair. Jo twirls a knife in her hand, aware of Anna's eyes on her. “I'm not so great with words. But I can show you how I feel,” Anna says quietly, breaking the silence. Jo frowns. “What do you mean?” Anna places two gentle fingers on Jo’s chin. “I'd really like to kiss you.” “Shit.” She doesn't bother to ask ‘really?’ Joking around isn't Anna's style. Jo takes a deep, cleansing breath then nods.The porch swing stops rocking as their lips meet.
Tags: AU, everybody lives, angst, angst with a happy ending, wax play, mild d/s undertones, off-screen scene negotiations.
Summary: She didn’t save Jessica due to a command from the Lord - she saved her for her own benefit. Her own selfish desires.
Notes: I screwed with the timeline a lot for this fic. Assume that Anna never tore out her grace and she’s an angel in s1. Assume Jo’s already a badass hunter. You know the drill.
If you’re going to do a scene with someone please research beforehand, set up a safeword, give the sub aftercare, etc.
Anna grips Jessica tight and pulls her from the flames, healing the wounds in her belly.
“What are you?” Jess asks, eyes wide with fear. They’re standing near Jessica’s school in the dark and Anna watches as Jessica shivers.
“My name is Anna. I’m an Angel of the Lord and I heard your cry.”
“This can’t be happening. Can’t be real.”
“Yes, it can.” Anna squeezes Jessica’s hand. “I’m real.”
“What would an angel want with me?” Jessica whispers, eyes welling up with tears that aren’t quite ready to fall. She yanks her hand away and Anna lets her.
“We have work for you,” Anna lies. She didn’t save Jessica due to a command from the Lord - she saved her for her own benefit. Her own selfish desires.
Jessica shakes her head. “I don’t believe in God.”
“I know.” Anna tilts her head, regarding Jessica closely. “I’ll take you to the Roadhouse.”
Jessica wrinkles her nose. “Are you insane? I have no idea where that is. I don’t know you. I’m not going anywhere until I get answers.”
“If you wish to be a hunter like Sam and Dean Winchester, you must go to the Roadhouse situated in Nebraska and talk to Ellen and Jo. You’ll fit in well there. Unless you’d rather stay in school?”
“Where’s Sam?”
“He can’t help you. Not unless you train to be like him.”
Jessica looks like she might cry again but then tilts her chin up, squaring her shoulders. “Fine. Let’s go. But when we get there I better get some real fucking answers.”
So, teleportation is a thing. Anna uses it to take them where they need to go and before Jess knows it she’s standing awkwardly outside the Roadhouse, the angel nowhere to be seen.
Well. Might as well get it over with. She could flip the fuck out later.
Jess walks in and sees a tiny little blonde right away that she hopes is Jo or Ellen. There’s this adorable scowl on her face and she looks about ready to punch a guy at the bar who has dared to lay a hand on her. She can obviously handle herself just fine, but Jess can’t help but saunter over anyway.
“Hey, need any help with this asshole? I’ll throw him out on his ass for you if you want.”
Jess is 5’11”, young and strong. She can make good on her offer and throw him out easy.
The girl snorts. “He’s nothing.”
“Hey!”
“Beat it, loser,” Jess hisses, voice low.
“Another man-hating lesbian, what a surprise,” the guy slurs and walks off.
“Charming,” Jess says, rolling her eyes.
“What’s your name?”
“Jess. Yours?”
“Jo Harvelle,” Jo says, grabbing a beer and handing it over to a customer. “Why are you here?”
“I was told you could help me,” Jess says, wondering where the fuck the angel was. Sure would make this whole damn thing easier.
“You a hunter?”
“Not yet. Maybe you could show me the ropes?”
Jess likes to think she’s good at reading people. She sees a struggle in Jo, like she’s working through the pros and cons of sending Jess away and it makes perfect sense - Jess is a stranger.
“You need to talk to my Mom before I agree to anything. You pass her tests and then we’ll see what I can do.”
Jess gets a crash course of sorts. Demons, shapeshifters and a lot of other fucked up other shit exist. Jo and Ellen mutter ‘Christo’, poke at her with silver, mention shit about retinal flares and throw holy water on her for good measure.
“I’m not sure Sam Winchester knows I’m alive.”
Ellen frowns at her. She’s been doing that a lot. “Why not?”
Jess shrugs. “I was saved from a fire and told to come here. Sam saw me in our bedroom, but when I was pulled from the flames he was gone.”
“That makes no sense! How could he have been gone already? Why would he leave you at all?”
“Like I said… I think he assumed I was dead. Um. I was saved by something that wasn’t human.”
“What do you think it was?” Jo asks, leaning closer to Jess.
“She said she was an angel. It teleported me here.”
“Get out of here. Angels are nothing but a fairytale.”
“That’s what I thought too, but she sounded pretty fucking convincing.”
Jo and Ellen exchange glances then Jo wiggles into her pants pocket and hands over a cell phone. “Guessing you’re gonna wanna call Sam? Doesn’t look like you have a phone on you.”
Jess lets out a relieved exhale. “Holy shit. Thank you.”
For awhile Anna is content to watch from a distance. She observes Jess learning how to hold and shoot a gun in a secluded field, the way that Jo moves in close and touches Jess’s lower back. She watches them whisper together, laugh and kiss.
Anna sees so many intimate moments and she wants them for herself. Wants to be a part of it.
It’s wrong to feel this way and it’s worse to show her face - but she’s been falling for awhile now, so what the hell.
They’re about to head back to Jo’s room when Anna wills herself to be seen.
“The fuck!” Jo yelps and doesn’t waste time in pointing a gun at her. “Better start talking.”
“Anna!”
“Anna who?” Jo asks and Anna is surprised by the pain in her chest, the sting of the question.
“I’m an Angel of the Lord,” Anna says sadly. “I’ve been watching over you.”
“Anna is the one who saved me. I… wouldn’t be alive without her.”
Jo puts her gun away, some of the hardness leaving her eyes. “Well, in that case, you’re welcome to join us in my room.”
“And do what?”
“Oh, angel,” Jess says, then presses flush against Anna. “We’re gonna have some fun.”
“What’s the candle for?” Anna asks, head tilting to one side.
Jess is completely naked and cuffed to the queen size bed. Jo smacks her thighs until she spreads them wide, bare pussy on display for Jo and Anna.
“Come closer and you’ll see,” Jo says, a small smirk on her lips.
“My guess is you’re gonna like it.” Jess squirms a little. “I mean… if, um. If you’re attracted to me or -”
Within moments Anna is on the bed, the kisses to her mouth sloppy and eager.
Jess can work with this.
“I’m gonna show you how to take care of her,” Jo demands, making Jess’s cunt clench. “Next time you can have full control. For now - watch.”
Anna doesn’t seem to want to stop kissing her but obeys and settles in next to Jess, eyes following Jo’s hands.
Jo waits until she has the full attention of the angel and Jess before picking up the candle and smirking. “To properly play with Jess you gotta tease her a bit, but for your sake, I’ll get to the really fun stuff right away. Jess?”
“Y-yeah. That sounds good.” She hates and loves how she’s already trembling. “Keep going.”
There’s a hungry look in Jo’s eyes as she stands over Jess. “The further away I keep it from Jess’s skin, the safer it’ll be -”
“I can heal any injuries she may receive,” Anna says.
“Oh.” Jo blinks in surprise but recovers quickly. “Thank you.”
Jess is vibrating on the bed. “Please. Hurry up.”
“I’m gonna turn you into my canvas,” Jo rasps and begins to drip wax onto her breasts and tummy, the burning sensation making Jess gasp in pleasure-pain.
“I want to touch,” Anna says, voice low. “I want to help.”
“Fuck yeah,” Jess breathes, nodding. “C’mon.”
“Go ahead,” Jo says.
Anna scoots down the bed, much to Jess’s dismay and situates herself between her legs. “Can I touch you anywhere?”
“God, yes.”
Anna beams and leans down, kissing her cunt.
“Oh, fuck yeah.”
“We’re gonna make you scream,” Jo says as Anna sticks out her tongue for a taste.
Femslash February is coming to a close and I realized I’m horrible and haven’t posted anything for it yet. So, I’m asking for short prompts (situation/kink/song lyrics/quote/line of dialogue/whatever + ship) to get my muse going! No promises on what I’ll fill, but I’d like to try!
Hey! Question regarding Operation Femslash: What if we write a fic that includes other pairings, for example a Destiel fic with a f/f side pairing (still main characters).
Hey there - if the F/F pairing is given equal weight, I think it could still fit; if it's a side pairing, not so much. The point of Operation Femslash is to make female characters the focus, since most of the fics in the F/F tag on AO3 are actually Dean/Cas fics with side pairings.
If you had a long fic with a side F/F pairing and you did a timestamp or something that features the pairing as the main subject, that would totally count, though!
Anna has always been a good student and a dutiful daughter, and done exactly what she was told, whether it made her happy or not. When she meets Ruby in an art class, she starts to wonder how satisfying obedience really is... and if making her own choices might be worth the rewards.
