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Guuuuurrrrl...

I’ve been making fun of Princess Of The Moon from day one but right now I’m just seriously pissed off and am gonna rant about it. I’ve played a lot of free mobile otome games and a lot of them had stupid plots, annoying characters and bland protagonists but this is the first time one of these games has made me want to approach the writers and scream at them. I’m not even sure if I still want to finish this game. I’m into some weird shit and willingly pick the sadistic characters usually but HOLY FUCK THIS IS TERRIBLE. I like a lot of questionable characters with bad personalities, I’m a yandere fan I love old school Diabolik Lovers. But the difference is that in all those other stories the narrative acknowledges that the characters are bad. They do fucked-up things but it’s never treated like they are in the right. In Princess Of The Moon, however, the characters are ruthless rapists who only care about themselves and use the protagonist as a tool to achieve their goals and the narrative, the other characters and even the player’s character ALL ACT LIKE THIS IS FINE. There isn’t even any romance at all, like, maybe I could file this under guilty pleasure masochistic smut but no. It’s very evident that the characters don’t care about the heroine and they have no chemistry whatsoever but she falls in love with them anyway and it’s treated like a romantic story.

Once again, bare in mind that I’m not easily offended and very tolerable towards casual sexism in dating sims but this game made me feel actually sick.

The game’s story starts with your character going to a foreign country called Crescent for some job. Some boring shit happens and she finds herself stranded on deserted streets at night, it’s raining and she’s lost her way. She decides to randomly enter the next best building and fortunately the doors aren’t locked for some reason, so she stumbles into a room full of good-looking young men.

The young men turn out to be the four princes of the country and their bodyguards knights, because everyone’s fashion sense and culture here got stuck in the middle ages somehow. They ask her name, she introduces herself and the first guy promptly tells her he’s going to have sex with her. Just like that. First I thought, “Ok, this is weird but I don’t mind if one character is a kinky little shit. It’s supposed to be kinda quirky, right?” Then things take an unexpectedly dark turn when this guy, called Alph, orders his knight to restrict the heroine so that he can have his way with her. WHICH HIS KNIGHT TOTALLY DOES. The incoming rape is only barely avoided when the other princes protest. So it turns out there’s a reason for all this, behold! According to legend, the four princes are to gather on this date and wait for the “Moon Princess” to come and pick one of them to be the next king. She will marry the chosen prince three (?) months later and when they say their vows the Moon Goddess will either bless or curse the country depending on wether the couple’s love is genuine. Crazy shit. Anyway, everyone believes that the heroine is said Moon Princess since she’s the one who showed up that time. And so you have to pick one of three guys (more to come, maybe?): The cocky narcissist Alph, the seductive Rudy or the mysterious Seraphino. There’s also Dean who’s established to be a bad guy right off the bat. Anyway, Rudy and Seraphino didn’t show much personality at all and since I’m a masochist anyway I went with Alph. I probably picked the worst possible character but I’ve heard from other people that the other characters are just as horrible.

Alph takes the heroine to his bedroom and once again forces himself upon her. When she struggles and tells him to GTFO he conceitedly says that any other girl would be ecstatic to get fucked by him. WTF. Once again his rape attempt his averted, this time by his butler Laurent who tells him it’s wrong to force someone to have sex against their will. I’m relieved to finally see a sane character in this bullshit story BUT THEN HE CONTINUES, SAYING ALPH HAS TO WAIT UNTIL THE NIGHT OF THE FULL MOON. It’s against the traditions to fuck the Moon Princess before a full moon, but after waiting a month it is totally fine to rape some poor random girl who was unfortunate enough to stumble into this group of lunatics.

Some time passes (time that you spent locked up in Alph’s secret room for rejecting him earlier) and you get introduced to Dean’s younger brother Cyril, a cute teenage sunshine. He invites you to a tea party but Alph is like, “Fuck no, he’s Dean’s brother and Dean is EVIL. He wants to be king so he’ll surely try to do something to you!” FUCK YOU, ALPH YOU RAPIST PIECE OF SHIT, WHAT COULD DEAN POSSIBLY DO THAT WOULD BE WORSE THAN WHAT YOU’RE DOING!? Oh yeah btw, after three months the Moon Princess can make up her mind and pick another prince as her husband/king if she’s unsatisfied with her first pick. And that would be cool if the game actually let you do that but no, you’re FATED to be in love with the guy you first pick. But anyway, doesn’t that mean that the worst Dean could do was to win her over? He’d just shoot himself in the leg if he tried to kill her or something. Alph finally agrees to let the heroine attend the party but only together with him and only if she does something for him first. Spoiler: It’s oral sex. Weirdly enough the heroine isn’t the one performing it; instead there’s a rather awkward scene of Alph eating her out that night. The tea party starts out all nice and fun but Alph is a huge party pooper and starts shit with Dean for no good reason. They somehow decide to settle their differences in a contest, and the winner gets to be the heroine’s partner at the next ball. Naturally, the heroine protests, pointing out that she isn’t just an object to be claimed as a prize. Alph tells her to STFU and she runs away, right into the arms of Alph’s knight Marius. After hearing why she’s so upset Marius tells her not to worry because Alph won’t lose to Dean. Um, THAT WASN’T THE POINT!? AT ALL!??? But the heroine feels a lot better for some reason.

Later Alph visits her in her room and is offended that she would still be angry at him. Not like the dickhead ever apologized or anything. He molests her some more and a bit later there’s a scene that made me want to vomit where Alph promises to Marius’ little brother that he’ll make many babies with the heroine so that the little boy can grow up to be a knight like his brother and protect the next generation of princes. That is the most fucked-up thing I have ever read.

And what do you know, it’s finally a full moon! Alph gets the heroine drunk (”So I heard you like wine? Here, I bought ALL this wine for you, aren’t I a nice guy?”), then strips her naked and just when she - barely conscious - realizes what’s going on he flat-out tells her that he made her drunk so she couldn’t fight back so much. In what would normally only be seen in a horror movie but is supposed to be romantic in the context of this game, he also adds that he made her drunk but not so drunk that she will pass out. He wants her to feel and remember everything he does to her.

And in all honesty, whatever happens in the chapters after this is kind of a blur because that really made me sick. Basically Alph gloats about raping the heroine, everyone else (including the heroine) acts like it’s nbd because she’s the Moon Princess and it’s her duty to fulfill the future king’s desires and then other characters openly tell her that they want to do the same to her and AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH MAKE IT STOP!

This is shit. This is pure and utter bullshit! Nobody should pay money for this game and quite frankly, I would love to tell the writers how fucking shit their sexist excuse of a “story” is. And punch them in the face. This is terrible, just terrible, I can’t, I fucking can’t!

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