a new emotion woowww...
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a new emotion woowww...
I just got paid today. About $2100 in net pay. Typical for about 110 to 120 hours of work over two weeks. So $375 into the joint account I share with my brothers that I live with to cover for my portion of rent and bills. And I will put another $375 next paycheck. $700 towards the Chase Amazon credit card. $200 to the bank credit card. $150 to my friend Lynnaquinn, good enough for groceries this week for her and her spouse, hopefully. And $250 for Johanna to get her out of the red and have enough for her phone bill, hopefully. Accounting for the $106 payment for my PC, and all other future charges covered on my two credit cards, I pretty much have $383 left in the checking account today. Or will once all of other the charges go through. So yea, just got paid $2100 and it is almost gone.
And still want to spend a little money on myself. Spending $100 for vbucks just to get more Fortnite skins, even after owning 573 of them. And after already spending $6000 on Fortnite in the two years I have been playing it. Getting myself a frozen pizza just because as well.
But yet, part of me just wants to instantly give Phoenix the $380. Because they are also really struggling. They expressed they can't keep going on like this. Been like this for years for Phoenix.
Another Paycheck that once I instantly get it, I need another one. I don't have enough to make sure my friends have a comfortable life. I don't have enough to get my teeth fixed. Haven't been to the dentist in years. And I emotionally broke down at the suggestion I should focus on myself and take care of my credit card debt. But that also feels impossible.
I hate budgeting. So I am really really bad at doing it. I just feels like not spending money at all. When Fortnite players, like my friends, talk about "saving vbucks" there is no such thing as saving vbucks. All saving vbucks is is simply not spending vbucks. Not getting the skins you want in the item shop.
The only way I see making any dent into my credit card debt is not giving money to my friends in need. Not spending as much money as I do. Or working as much overtime as I can. 12 hours days 6 days a week. Or any combination of the three, or all three. And when I do work 12-hour days, I have like 15 fifteen minutes in the morning, all used to get dressed and leave for work, and then whatever time I give myself when I come home for the evening, which is maybe two hours at most. And no more because I shouldn't stay up beyond 2 am.
I don't know how much more I need to earn at my job to feel whole. Or to feel well. Maybe double what I make now. But how fucking likely will that happen for someone without a college degree in this economy.
But I fucking hate thinking like this. I hate being concern with money. I hate getting pay over $2000 and it is still not enough. I hate that my friends are in poverty and will probably just never get out of it. I hate there is no end in sight for this cycle. I hate the fucking system that we live in. And hate how there are many people that will defend Capitalism. Or believe, "You just have to vote for the right people to be our benevolent dictator. And they will improve the system. #VoteBlueNoMatterWho." I hate feeling powerless to end of this misery. And I have other friends and family members that are suffering too..... I just feel..... bleph.... meh .... urg.....
entj things
2 days left of work and I couldn't be happier.
Its been a place that has taught me a lot, taken me on a career path I never expected of myself, brought interest and intrigue on a subject I never gave much thought to previously. Made me realise my value, my abilities to work as part of a team and to lead a team.
It's enriched my life with some amazing friends.
But as I said, I couldn't be happier to be leaving. I will absolutely take away all the positive aspects of the job.
But it's also taught me how little a workforce is valued to those holding the cash, pulling the strings and really reaping the reward for us low paid workers.
From the hit of covid, before the Lockdown, my director refused to spend out on extra cleaning supplies announcing how stupid everyone was to worry and how this would blow over.
To then forcing all staff to sign contracts agreeing to have our hours cut by 50%, or he would have to start letting us go.
When furlough set in we were all so thankful.
I was brought back first, before my manager because she refused (the phrase "lead by example" springs to mind) to come back herself.
We were then all forced to sign some dodgy contracts that very much sounded like we would agree to being so flexible we may end up working 0hrs or 12hrs depending on them. many so scared to lose their jobs have signed this, I refused unless it was edited.
My concerns and worried were ridiculed and ignored.
I was advised on new official health and safety guidelines and risk assessments and then advised on the corners we would be cutting to please their pockets. The very unsafe corners they were prepared to cut.
My suggestions on cleanliness, PPE safety, distancing between staff, all ignored constantly. The extra risk I was having to take each day on public transport disregarded.
They are so loose with the guidelines, the only interest they have is the initial appearance of following rules. But anything goes as long as it will make money.
When I expressed that I had felt no support or clear guidance when I returned to work, that I didn't feel safe, I was advised that I needed to get on with my job or risk having my position brought into question and my abilities to perform investigated.
For some reason they then became surprised and annoyed that I then handed in my notice.
I know that I am one of the hardest working there. I can confidently say I run things far better and make the days run far smoother than the manager, I direct the staff better and fairly and I have their trust and respect.
I'm confident that when I move on to a new job I can take all this knowledge with me.
I wasn't expecting much in return for all the work I've done, but I'm honestly shocked work how little I've gotten. My notice period was 2months. My manager only a few days ago asked me for the first time what I'll be doing when I leave.
There has been no talk of leaving celebrations, but plans of celebrating a record week we had recently. One I was a big part of, but haven't been included in as they planed that for a couple of weeks after I leave.
When I handed in my noticed, I was advised to not discuss it with too many people, the announcement made (just two weeks ago) was via work group text and nothing nice was said, just I'm leaving so my position is available and for anyone to contact them if they are interested.
I was owed 2 weeks holiday and instantly requested it. My director tried to rejected it a month later, claiming they needed me (they still have people on furlough) when I explained that I have made plans and that I had requested this a month ago, his reply was that he was disappointed I was forcing us to be leaving on bad terms and that I hadn't discussed my holiday request to him. I had to point that when I requested it I texted him same day to explain why. And that I then brought it up with him on person. And that I felt shocked he would declare that somehow I was leaving on bad terms.
Anyhow. For the most part I'm glad there will be no leaving celebrations, there are very few people left that I care to spend time with outside of working hours. Most I have built good relationships with, have left themselves and I'm in contact with still, so can arrange celebrations of being part of the gang that got away.
Can I request some headcannons for Wayfinder trio with a book smart S/O who gets really passionate about whatever research/project they're working on, sometimes to the detriment of their health/general wellbeing? Like they'll ramble about their work for hours b/c they're really passionate about it, but sometimes they get so absorbed in what they're doing that they'lk forget to eat/sleep/etc. Sorry this is so long rip
No, that’s cool, like that I’m sure to give you what you want !
Terra :
He loves that when you get excited and share everything with him
Though, when he notices you’re going too far and forgot to take care of yourself, he will do it for you. Making you eat, reminding you to take break, ...
If you continue, he’ll scold you in a big brother manner, explaining to you why you shouldn’t push yourself at your limits like this
If you still don’t sleep, he will force you in a cuddle session until you fall asleep in his arms
Ventus :
Wen you’re excited, he’s excited. Even if he doesn’t understand all what you’re saying. But that’s okay, you still can explain to him !
However, when he notices that you’re pushing yourself to even forget to eat and sleep, he’s worried
He tries to talk to you about this
If you keep going, he will ask Aqua and Terra for help
Aqua :
She likes seeing you happy and will listen to you
But when she notices you’re doing too much, she scolds you. She’s ready to make food for you and make you eat by herself if she needs to!
For sleeping, it will be more tricky : you’re not a child and she’s not your mother. She can’t order you to go to sleep and she doesn’t see herself dragging you to bed. So Aqua will try to convince you.
prompt
a young whumpee (late high school or in college) pushing themselves to the limit when a test is coming up. neglecting their wellbeing for a grade, losing sleep from stress, neglecting other classes. when the test is over they go straight to bed, a caretaker finding them asleep on the couch
bonus points if they fail the test
bonus points if they get sick from the stress
I cannot focus at all at work right now, i just want to log off and get high 😫😫