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my job keeps trying to tell me to be nice to a shitty man. YOU CANT MAKE ME. IF HES A BITCH TO ME CONSEQUENCE FREE I’M GONNA BE A BITCH TO HIM. IF MY BOSSES WANNA TALK TO ME ABOUT ‘BULLYING’ HIS SORRY ASS THEY CAN TALK TO ME ABOUT IT. Yes your honor I am bullying his pathetic ass but in my defense hes trying to manipulate me and my friends and he’s REALLY FUCKING BAD AT lT. AND ITS PISSING ME OFFFF
i have been feeling the ‘make a fanvid’ itch but collecting clips is so time consuming and all the ideas i have are for characters that i don’t already have a shit ton of clips saved for
my sister asked me to babysit my sweet baby niece while she’s at a wedding nearby and I’m so excited. It’s been a while since I’ve been able to see her or my siblings (i’ve been trying. honestly i just need to figure out when my siblings are hanging out next and i need to crash it). Its not for another like 2 weeks but i’m just so excited. We’re gonna have dance parties and i’m gonna show her some new music! I’m gonna double check with my sister and i’ll probably put on some old school sesame street for her. WE’LL MAKE COOKIES!!! (I’ll make cookies and we’ll see if she’s interested in helping). I’ve got a lot of cute kids books for her god I’m exciteddd
Start > Storage > Folders > Personal Logs > 5/25/XX
I’m still not convinced this whole thing isn’t a dream.
I’m dating FOUR hotties, and now I’m engaged to one of them? How did that happen?
If I were speaking to anyone in person I’d say it’s no surprise. Everyone wants me. But that’s not really true. No matter how much I pretend otherwise. I’ve grown up hearing it from everyone around me, save for maybe three people in total. No matter how much I try to twist their words to make myself look good, none of this is real.
I wake up every morning scared that I’m back in the Stables, that none of This actually happened. That I’ll just be back to cooking up Jet and going between girls paid to keep me company.
I’m afraid that Evie, Mr. Valentine, Hancock, Xerxo, Paladin Danse, and Dad aren’t actually there. Afraid that Molly and Gregor (as much as I hate him, he’s important to Evie, so if anything ever happened to him I’d go after whoever hurt him) are just figments of my imagination, brought on by chems.
But then I see Mal, Sam, Norm, and Nico, and things don’t feel as awful. I think without them I’d be dead in a ditch somewhere.
Even if this is a hallucination or a dream, it’s a good one.
I should probably put a password on this folder.
the way men perceive me and treat me is fascinating. I’m fat (which has its own gendery complications) and I do lean masc especially at work (a lot of my costumes lean femme and i like bein comfy) and my pronouns are public knowledge so maybe they just. Don’t view me as a woman. Even when I call myself a woman/girl/bitch whatever. They are not as ‘protective’ over me as they are with other women. Nor are they as touchy with me. The ones that’ll ask for hugs from the other women at work don’t tend to ask me. Have they noticed I’m not big on physical contact or is it a misogyny thing? Am I being viewed as a man or a broken woman? They still talk down to me though. Some who say heinous shit to my friends, will never do that if I’m in a room. Are you afraid of me? I’m not a man or at least not one they could respect so I don’t get that, but I also don’t get the same demeanor they give to most other women. Do you not know what to do with me? I don’t care either way but I’m curious
you ever had a man tell you where a weird noise that he HASN’T HEARD is coming from? He just assumes he knows and that none of the three women in the room who actually heard the sound checked to see where it was coming from? Bitch.
I do love telling men they’re wrong though.
i wanna write an essay :(((( fuck i hate that its been so long since i’ve written an essay. I love to argue with a brick wallll. My constant enemy, whatever ways I thought my professors may counter my argument. They could never counter too much. I saw some of the other essays they were getting. I read some really stupid and poorly researched essays, but I’ll be damned if i didn’t work to improve their argument structure.
Shout-out to the person in the discord server who heard how many painkillers I was regularly taking and said "Oh, Marlin, you're chronically ill"; you were correct
