#pjo funny textposts

[anotherpjofan]

Rachel is officially everyone's sugar mommy. Like girl is the daughter of a billionaire with friends who are a) majorly traumatised b) have shitty parents c) are broke ass kids who prob won't live to see another day so she definitely buys unnecessarily expensive things for all of them

Rachel: Here

Percy: Thank you for the keys??

Rachel: Your welcome. The porche is outside chb

Percy: The what??

Obviously its a full time job to get her friends to accept her gifts but then Piper daughter-of-a-famous-movie-star McLean comes along and they join forces

Piper: I bought Annabeth a motorbike

Rachel: How do we convince her to take it?

Piper: I'm just saying its from Hestia

Rachel: Checks out. It'll probably make Athena pissed too

[anotherpjofan]

You ever think about the fact that Jason Grace was at the roman camp since he was two? Like new rome only allows you to actually live in the city after at least 10 years of service right? So this dude has never been inside a classroom. Let that sink in. Does he even know basic math? Or geography? Or science? Does he even know that the world is round? Does he even know what a smartphone is??

Jason: I wish there was an easy way to call someone who’s far away instead of yelling

Leo: haha very funny Jace now can you call-

Jason: PIPER WE NEED YOU

Also he definitely dosen’t have a concept of money. New Rome uses drachmas right? Which is pure gold? So when he goes into the the gold shop he’s like

Jason: OH I get it now one drachma is the equivalent of $10 000 right?

Piper:

Jason: Everything here is so cheap! I can get 10 000 sweets for one drachma. I’m never going to go back to New Rome

Jason: THOSE CAPTIALISTS ARE SCAMMING US

Piper: I can’t believe you know what capitalism is but not how money works

Piper: Also…are the gods the capitalists then?

There’s so much potential here like does Jason even know about aeroplanes? Like maybe he does subconsciously since he’s the son of Zeus but he’ll just freak out cause why?? do I know this?! Just Jason being clueless at how the rest of the world works.

[anotherpjofan]

Percy: I hate math

Piper: I hate math

Leo: ...Is it a bad time to mention I could do college level maths at 9