A/N: Had angst on the brain. Be ready
"Like that daddy?" You question as you crack the eggs in the good bowl like he had shown you too. Vander chuckled and made sure to catch the egg shells you were about to drop before they fell into the cake mixture. Placing the broken pieces on the counter to later put in the garbage he wiped at his hands taking in the sweet smell from the batter. Oh well crunchy cake was never a bad thing. He's sure the extra sugar you snuck in would cover the taste, besides you had waited long enough for the others and thanks to them being late you were impatient. He honestly didn't blame you. Wasn't often you got cake.
In fact it was only once a year on a very special day.
Sighing at the mess you'd both made he handed you a large spoon to mix it all together. You carefully stand on the stool so your a little taller than the counted and begin to mix with a concentrated look on your face. He hums at your work before assessing the damage. The counter had become a mess of scattered ingredients and your clothes and apron would need a good washing. You were covered in flour among other things but you were insistent on helping. Since your uncle's weren't here to distract you while he baked he gave in knowing the cost. Scooping up some of the once ingredients he plops them into the trash since they were unusable now. You claimed you were finally old enough to join him and you really wanted to prove that by making your cake almost by yourself.
He couldn't say no too your cute face.
"Like this dad?" You question snapping him back to watch you carefully. You were squashing the ingredients and mixing them like you'd seen him do a hundred times. As he grabs a towel and begins the cleaning process he swipes a bit of the batter.
"Perfect cupcake." He teases you as he tastes it and you smile happy. Looking at the likely stained counter he paused seeing little piles of different ingredients he'd have to wipe away.
Still mixing he gets a sneaky grin before he dots his finger in one of the sugar piles you'd made while pouring. Whistling innocently you look up at him confused before he smears some on the tip of your nose.
"Dad that's for the cake!" You complain and he laughs before kissing it off.
"I think we're well past that point." He hums looking at the messy counter before he leans down to nuzzle you. You giggle as his beard lightly tickles your face and a puff of white comes off you from all the flour you'd gotten on yourself. "Besides it's for you because your just so sweet. Sometimes papa just wants to eat you, your sweeter than the sugar." He states before picking you up and making eating noises as he pretend eats you.
"No papa no!" You wail before thinking fast. Reaching behind you and thunking him with the mixing spoon he drops you in surprise. As you land with an oooof on the kitchen floor, batter runs down his face in a drippy pattern. You look up at him from your place on the floor trying to stop your giggles at his surprised face. Glancing at the sink water seeing his reflection he begins laughing with you. You grab your dad a clean towel to wipe his face off and he keeps laughing as he takes it.
"You two are so sweet it's almost disgusting." Someone states from the doorway making you pause. Turning to look you were right.
"UNCLE SILCO!" Running towards him you jump into his open arms sending a cloud of flour everywhere. Picking you up and holding you close despite the mess he chuckles as your disheveled form and the war zone the kitchen had become. Pushing your hair back he kisses your forehead happy to see his favorite child. Butter, sugar, and flour touch his lips making him chuckle as he pulls away.
Your father wasn't kidding, you really were your own pastry.
"Hello ankle biter. What mischief are you making today?" He questions playfully, already knowing the answer as he nuzzles into you. He looks to Vander with a slight eyebrow raise. Your father shrugs at him before he opens the wood stove checking on the fire, it was ready he just had to out the batter in a pan. You don't see focusing on Silco instead of the cake for now. Letting out some giggles as he teases you, you smile gently pushing his sharp face away as he keeps nuzzling you.
"Cake!" You state excited and your uncle smiles down at you, his raven hair framing his thin face as his sea green blue eyes stare at you and than look up at your father who shrugs sliding the tin into the oven. So this bomb going off in his bars kitchen was Vanders version of a cake and not some kind of food war? Must be one hell of a cake. Though he supposed without him and Benzo there he fell pray to your puppy dog eyes.
"Cake? Why are you making cake?" Silco questions playfully and you gasp as your tiny fists clutch his vest in disbelief. A hand goes through your hair and he hums with a small smirk. You really did take after him when it came to dramatics, perhaps your father was right in calling the revolutionist a bad influence. The look of betrayal on your face almost makes Silco stop his teasing but you were too cute all shocked and wide mouthed as you stared at him. He wished he could take a picture and keep you young and small forever. But alas you were growing as all children do. Much too quickly in his opinion. As all children in Zaun did.
"No you can't forget what day it is!" You complain and Silco makes a dramatic face as he leans against the wall and puts his hand to his head feigning ignorance. You cling to him as he leans back and he peaks an eye open to see your displeased face. Chuckling light heartedly he adjusts on the cool wall as you cross your arms and pout supported by his arm holding you up.
You always were a ray of sunshine in the pits they called Zaun, even when you were upset or pouty. You deserved the world.
"Oh heavens. What did I forget? Is it someone's birthday? Is our little munchkin getting older? No I won't allow it, you must be small forever." He states getting up only to sqeeze you close as if to shrink you. Squealing in delight that he remembered the day before trying to squirm out of his arms he smiles stopping the silly game. He peppers your face in kisses instead glad your in such a good mood. You deserved to always be happy and always be smiling especially on your birthday.
"Stop stop!" You whine and he finally does when Vander gives him a look. Not noticing you see something behind Silcos back clipped to his bag. Your eyes widen in excitement realizing it was likely a gift for your big day. "Did you bring me something?" You question vibrating in his arms. Silcos sly smile made you squeal as he always had the best gifts.
"(Y/N) that's rude to ask." Your father chides and your face goes red before you hide in Silcos vest resting in the soft and nice smelling fabric.
"You did though? Right?" You try to whisper and Vander lets out a loud groan as Silco winks at him. Peaking at your uncle he winks at you too making you giggle quietly.
"Silco your corrupting my child again. Either put on an apron and help me with this mess or get out of here. No free cake for you Mr. Late." He teases and you laugh as your dad takes you from Silco throwing you into the air before he catches you. Squealing as your thrown towards the kitchens ceiling again, Silco rolls his eyes placing his bag down before he puts on an extra apron hanging from the wall.
"Your the boss cake face." Silco responds coyly and your dad glares at him before letting out a little smile, some batter still stuck on his face from your earlier assault. Silco snorts in response to Vanders childish ways. He looks at the floor that'd need mopping before glancing back at Vander as he ties the apron. "Benzo will be here soon, he sent me ahead but I got a little side tracked with a job. He's getting something from his shop. Our mission went long." He explains averting his eyes from you before bending down towards his bag. "So cake face what are we doing?" Silco pushes the tease and you giggle as your dad rolls his eyes.
"I'll show you cake face." Vander threatens but before he can do anything he has a face full of flour as you run and hide behind Silco. Silco chuckles and and unbuckles the thing attached to his pack before standing infront of you to shield you.
"It looks like they won brother. It's only fair after such a tactful victory they get one of their presents early and you clean while we go play victorious." He states and you jump up and down at the idea as Vander rolls his eyes again.
"Ahhh. Traitor." He states towards the both of you as he swats his arm and turns towards the gigantic mess. "Would've been more fair with Benzo, two against two." Vander murmers making you chuckle before you turn towards Silco eyeing his closed fist.
He holds both hands up and scooting closer he loosens his grip revealing what's inside his hold. A shiny black case with a sapphire on the top catches your attention. Reaching out to touch the gift the case is soft velvet. You almost feel bad touching such a material with messy hands but Silco urges the item closer when you go to pull away. As Vander glares at him Silco shrugs before seperating his hands opening the case. Your eyes widen at your first weapon.
A small yet large in your hands silver dagger. Something you'd surely grow into. It had a gold tipped blade and a black wrapped leather handle with a pearl bottom. It looked as expensive as the case, maybe more so and as you held it, it felt heavy in a good way. Was it really for you? Touching the sharp edge Vander frowned at the intricate but dangerous gift.
"To cut the cake." Silco explains or maybe defends as he squeezes your shoulders looking up at Vander with begging eyes. You nod agreeing with your uncle as you hold the treasure close excited for the cake to bake so you could try it out. Vander didn't seem happy but regardless of his feelings he never took the gift away.
Startling awake from your dream the memories of cake and laughter and small presents drifted away. You paused as your head spun and neck creaked from falling asleep sitting up. Groaning before having a coughing fit your hand rubbed your throat to soothe the soreness. You guessed your birthday always brought back tough memories but this sickness whatever it was, wasn't helping. Ruminating on that moment from years ago, remembering the loss of your uncle you push it away.
"Powder... powder can you get me some water? Maybe with lemon? They should be back soon." Blinking trying to clear your vision you had a faint ringing in your ears. Looking up when you didn't get a response from the her you realize your all alone and the little blue haired girl was nowhere to be seen. Reaching for your dagger just incase their was danger you were on your own. Pushing yourself off the couch with unsteady feet going towards her bed you stop noticing the sheets were empty and all her monkey bombs and inventions were gone.
"Fuck." You curse before stumbling towards the stairs.
Running out of the bar searching for her the smog of the streets didn't help your senses. Hacking as you rushed through back alleys with dull lights but pulsing noises you head where you knew they were. Your heartbeat pounded in your head and your footsteps echoed around you bouncing around your skull. Continuing to where you needed to be you tripped down the back streets of Zaun. Legs wobbling from the strain of running when you felt the way you felt you heaved in the nights cold and smog filled air. Just your luck to get sick on your birthday when your friends needed you most.
Vi was so gonna give you an earful when she learned Powder escaped your watch and Vander probabaly wouldn't be happy either. Bending over to catch your breath you wheezed as your hands gripped your knees and you closed your eyes. Coughing you slowly stand again, holding your trusted dagger incase you needed to use it. Throwing all those thoughts to the side you push yourself off the grimy wall behind you and get closer to where Violet said your father was being held. Where the others should be if they weren't home.
Stopping you taste the metallic air feeling something different. Eyes widening even with your bad nose you can smell the smoke.
Getting a burst of adrenaline you rush forward despite the dizziness and run out onto the peir. Ash and water mix under your feet as your boots splash through the sickening puddles. You smelled it before you saw it and when you saw it, your sickness wasn't the only thing that made you want to vomit.
"DAD! DADDDDDD!" You cough as the sour air burns your agitated throat but you can't stop calling for him. For any of them. They had to be around here somewhere. They had to have gotten out. Feeling your world shatter you don't see anyone. God where were they? Where were they?
This was your fault, your fault. You should've gone with them, you should've been there too. How could you let them leave without you? Feeling tears prick your eyes you sway on the wooden pier as the building goes up in flames. How could you not watch Powder closer? How could you let them do this? "VIOLET! CLAGGOR! MYLO! POWDER!" Tears streak down your face as you watch the building burn unable to do anything to stop the fire. Embers fly through the air like orange flickering stars and burn your skin as they land on you. Ash coats your hair and fills your lungs as you stare at where they should be. Frantic you turn every which way despite your blurring vision searching for anyone. Your friends, your family!
You were supposed to watch Powder keep her safe with you until everyone else got back. But you were sick, you closed your eyes for a second. Just a second!!! "POWDER! VANDER!" How could this happen? Who would do this? Screeching louder, screaming into the endless night, the heat of the fire and thickness of the smoke could be felt from where you were standing.
Running towards the flames with shaky but determined legs, long and slender arms wrap around your waist stopping you from rushing into the unstable building. You sob screaming bloody murder through your sore throat as you claw at their hands dagger knicking them, as you desperately reach for the building. Tears streak down your soot stained face and you begin coughing violently from both the atmosphere and your sickness as you continue to struggle with all you have. You tried to stab them with your dagger but a familiar hand held your hand back keeping you from cutting yourself or them. Your eyes widened in panic as your recognized the person holding you back. After all they gave you the knife in the first place.
"Shhhh... Shhhhh." He coos and you wish he was in that building burning with them. "It's alright. I have you now. I have you now." He keeps soothing and you want to kill him. You want to kill him. This is his fault. He did this. He DID this. You wished he'd died that day like Vander told you he had. You wished he was dead.
Turning you try and stab him again, try to hurt him a fraction of the way he's hurt you. By leaving. By betraying you and dad. By doing this! He takes the gift he once gave you away and you'd find that ironic if you weren't on the verge of a full mental breakdown.
You scratch at him reaching for your dagger before you decide you want nothing from him and begin to pound your fists against his chest instead. Screams of rage rip out of your sore throat like a rapid animal as you mourn the loss of everything and everyone you'd ever loved. It begins to rain and you can't tell what's tears and what's sky as you continue to try and rip him apart.
"I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! YOU KILLED HIM! YOU KILLED HIM!" You screech fighting against Silco as the flames raise higher burning the building and all that were inside to the ground. He simply hums softly pulling you tightly into his chest as you continue to weakly fight him. His fingers go through your tangled hair as they once did so long ago and your so overcome by the emotions flooding through you, you don't know what to do. You wanted your dad, you needed your dad. But Vander was gone.
As you cough and cry and choke on your words he keeps you to his vest facing away from the carnage, caring you to him despite your struggles. You remember him holding you like this as a child. You remember your laughter as he kissed your forehead after a bad day and shared a private joke with you. Your smile as he told crazy stories about him and your dad at dinner. The way he made you happy despite the hard times you were all going through. The sparkling blue green of his passionate eyes. But he betrayed you, he betrayed your father. He burned every bridge he had with your family and he became the monster your father wanted to protect you and the Undercity from.
Your fist fruitlessly pounds against his chest again but as he tucks you under his chin holding you close your knees give out as you lean into his grip sobbing. The air is so heavy with the smell of smoke and you taste ash on your tongue as it sticks to your wet hair and skin. The tears don't stop as you become soaked and the cries from you hold all your pain.
They're gone. Your families gone.
"I hate you..." You mumble voice breaking and cracking as you force your face further into his vest to make all the bad things go away. He simply continues to hum seeming unphased at your pitiful state and scathing comments.
Vander. Benzo. Powder. Mylo. Claggor. Violet. They were all gone. Everything. Everyone. Gone.
"... That's alright... because no matter what I love you." He whispers quietly as he keeps you close. Except for your screams and sobs and the background noise of the collapsing building as the fire burns brighter and higher it's quiet in Zaun. Just another silent tragedy that'd go unnoticed by Piltover and other Zaunites in the Undercity. "I'll take care of you now." He promises as he soothes your hair and kisses your forehead and you just fall against him wondering how it all went so wrong. How he could do this to you, today of all days. How you lost everything on a day that was supposed to be happy. You wish you'd taken that knife when he gifted it to you all those years ago and plunged it into him rather than the cake.
"I hate you." You repeat and he gives you the dagger casing but not the dagger itself.
You had given it to him that day, the day he died. He wouldn't take your dagger to the battle so you gave him the case to bring him good luck. Clutching it close just to have something familiar near, the velvet is worn and well loved.
"I know." He says softly as his blue and red eye stares at the blazing fire. He takes off his coat wrapping your shivering body into it and pulling you close as he goes to lead you away from this nightmare. "But someday you won't."
