#precog!weiss

[wu-gang-writing]

Weiss: Jaune will this plan work?

Jaune: ...

Weiss: What?

Jaune: Precog-says-what?

Weiss: ?!?!

Jaune: ...

Weiss: That was so unfair!

Jaune: I don't know if my plan will work. I'm not a fortune teller. Fortune tellers are powerful witches gifted with 'the sight.'

Weiss: ...

Jaune: Your power terrifies me. Next question.

Weiss: When am I right now?

Jaune: How the fuck would I know?

[wu-gang-writing]

Their understanding of time is fucked

Jaune: Hahaha. Psyche.

Weiss: Wait what's the joke?

Jaune: *walking away*

Weiss: Wait! *Chasing him* What was the April fools prank?! Get back here!

*hours later*

Weiss: I never found out what the prank was! It's driving me nuts!

Yang: ... Weiss? Can't you see the future?

Weiss: I can't control that! It just happens! I want to know what the prank was!

Yang: ...

Weiss: Oh. It was a retro-causal prank. He laughed and delivered the punchline, then the prank happened.

Yang: ... You gave him a lot of attention today didn't you.

Weiss: ...

[wu-gang-writing]

Batshit insane semblance-siren

Jaune: *drops a stack of paper reports when he runs into Weiss*

Weiss: *Picks them up into a neat stack with the pseudo telekinesis*

Jaune: 'Hello? I'll take all the powers please and thank you.'

Weiss: Why can't you just be grateful?

Jaune: I am. But you cheat. Your family are soul-parasite chameleon-vampires.

Weiss: *folds arms in front of herself and glares at him* Explain yourself immediately.

Jaune: Is that an order?

Weiss: *nods*

Jaune: You have Schnee kids right? And each addition in the family tree becomes a new glyph. So after centuries? *Shrugs* What do you think the real reason you want kids with me is? Our powers have incredible synergy. Imagine that in a single kid.

Weiss: *mouth agape and staring at him*

Jaune: Thanks for the favor I guess but you reminded me exactly what I am sharing a planet with. Forgot my bedside manner. *Walking away*

Weiss: Wait-! *Rushes after him and grabs his hand* Wait! Is that true?!

Jaune: *stops and turns and looks* Which part?

Weiss: All of it... I guess...

Jaune: There's guesswork on my end. Just keep looking like a snack and it will all work out... Wanna bet you picked up a power for your voice at some point? Some hypnotism master thing? How about the fact you can see a little into the future?

Weiss: ...

Jaune: Batshit insane semblance-siren. *Leaves*

Weiss: .... What just happened to me? Did you guys hear all that?

Blake: I mean... Now that he put it into words I can absolutely see it.

Weiss: We aren't... Whatever that is. Are we?

Blake: Your sister and Qrow? Imagine if you could just flip his semblance onto your opponent like a switch - area of effect bad luck.

Weiss: ... Oh my gods...! I need to make a call.

[wu-gang-writing]

Ironwood: Where do you see yourself in five years?

Jaune: Well five years ago I did not see myself here so obviously this game doesn't work.

Winter + Weiss: ... It does for me...

Jaune: Witch bitches who can see the future do not count.

[wu-gang-writing]

Weiss: Heard.

Ruby: I wish my girlfriend who can see a little into the future would stop asking 'do you see the vision'.

[wu-gang-writing]

Jaune: *opens his mouth to tell a knock knock joke*

Weiss: Not answering the door. You can stay outside.

Jaune: Really? That's how you use your precognition? To fuck with me?

Weiss: You would have fucked with me.

[wu-gang-writing]

Part 1

Weiss: ... Winter? Are we actually these entities Jaune is describing? Just these agents walking down the eons and adding powers to our repertoire?

Winter: *staring at her tea* Our semblance is very diverse and identical in how it manifests in each generation... It's a delightfully juicy and terrifying explanation...

Weiss: What are we? Why Qrow and Jaune?

Winter: There are other aspects to this, to us and them. The substance abuse which also appeared in our mother, for one. The only way to know for certain if we are or aren't these entities is to-

Weiss: 'Both of us have children'? But then we would say that, wouldn't we.

Winter: You don't have to have children. No one is forcing you to. Indeed I have contemplated not having children even if I met someone.

Weiss: Yes. I as well. But we have both 'met someone.' And would you still choose to not have his children if he was willing?

Winter: ... Confirmation bias?

Weiss: Perhaps. But then I wasn't the one who introduced myself to this line of reasoning. Our very personalities seem to flow in a way that confirms it.

Winter: ... I suppose we should talk it through with them... It's the only thing we can do.

Weiss: I was worried you'd say that. He hangs on every word I say. 'Is that an order?'

Winter: You're saying if we are these things consent on their end is also suspect.

Weiss: He even mentioned my singing may be related.

Winter: ... What do we do?

Weiss: ... We finish our drinks.

Winter: ... Why does it seem like you don't want it to be true?

Weiss: Are you serious? You want to be that?

Winter: *quietly* ... I want my babies to be safe... Having them be like Qrow is a good way to do that... Not just his power but his personality. Remnant is dangerous.

Weiss: Winter?

Winter: *firmly* More than how I feel about it - I want my babies to be able to handle hard lives. You do too! And that is what is actually appealing about them as fathers!

[wu-gang-writing]

Stroking out