Summary: Other men really need to stop hitting on you or they're gonna lose their minds.
Warning: Saja boys, possessive! saja boys, jealousy, yandere behaviour, oblivious! reader, dumb! reader, crybaby? reader, death (not reader or the saja boys), grammatical errors probably and incorrect spellings, english is not my first language, probably more.
Author's note: The first part reached over 3,000+ notes in just two days (I don't know if that's a good thing or not) but thank you nonetheless! This happens before the first part. This is not proofread lol
Part 1
Coming into the Korean pop music business as a group's manager wasn't exactly what you planned that would happen to you, it wasn't the job you dreamed of but it paid rent and the boys you were looking after weren't that bad, they were extremely clingy and a tad over protective for someone they appointed as their manager for 6 months. It was unexpected but the 5 boys seemed nice enough that immediately made you accept their offer as their manager, their looks were just bonuses.
Apparently, being their manager also requires you to bring them food (Baby said so) and while they offered to come with you, you disagreed because you didn't want to disrupt their dance practice. They gave you their money, of course.
So that's why you were currently in the supermarket, pushing the trolley as you tried to remember what it was that the boys liked to eat. It seemed only Baby loved the hot sauce after getting a free taste on one of the few times they came with you to the shops.
"You can buy what you want with the money too, pretty." they said before you walked off, handing you a butt load of money that wouldn't be able to fit in your wallet.
And that's what you did, throwing your favourite food after food inside the trolley with a giddy smile before stopping to think what your boys liked.
A tap on the shoulder interrupted you from your thoughts making you turn around to see an admittedly handsome man who seemed about your age, ginger hair, brown eyes and fair skin. He's a foreigner, that much was obvious. You blink in surprise and confusion, "Uh, hello? something wrong, sir?" You asked, voice laced with its usual softness and trying to speak in english.
The male cleared his throat, "Uh.." he was momentarily distracted by your looks and cute voice. "Uhm, ye-yes... I-" He cleared his throat again.
You raised an eyebrow, 'Is he alright?' you thought.
"I think you're really pretty and... I was wondering if you'd like to go on a date with me..." He finally says, cheeks tinted pink. British.
Your eyes widened, feeling your own cheeks heat up at his words and accent. This is the first time in years since someone had asked you out, someone this handsome and has a british accent! That's practically the sexiest accent in the world, at least that's what your friend said to you.
"Oh! My name is Brandon, I'm not from here and I just... I thought you very pretty and I'm rambling.." He stammered out, face reddening even more. "I don't know, I just- I wanted to try and have a friend... it doesn't have to be a date-date, just a friendl-"
You don't have an understanding of the whole english language but you definitely got the gist of that.
You interrupted him with a kind smile, "I accept!" You exclaim, trying to hide your excitement.
Brandon smiled back, "h-here... my number, call me? I mean w-we can meet tomorrow for that date.." He said as he handed me a piece of paper with his number that he wrote before walking towards me.
You gave him a nod and a small wave as he walked away with a skip.
You opened the door to the boy's dance rehearsal, carrying three bags of food (the two bags were for you). The boys stopped their practice and immediately went to fight each other on who could help you, practically pushing each other away before Abby grabbed the bags from your hand with a charming smile, "I'll handle them for you, pretty." He said as the rest scoffed.
"Thank you!" I smiled, "So how's practice going?"
Jinu sighs at the question, moving to stand beside you. You could practically smell him with how sweaty he is, no- you could smell all of their musky smell. "It's fine," He huffs, trying to cover up the fact that it was not doing well at all with how much the rest of the guys stressed him out a lot.
"I did tell you I could hire a dance instructor for you guys," I hum, trying to ignore their scent.
Baby rolls his eyes, "Don't. I don't want other people in here." He mutters. I don't want you talking to anybody else, especially if it's a guy.
"Don't worry your pretty little head about it," Romance reassures as he took the place on the other side of you. "Just watch us and look all beautiful for us... okay, Ms. Manager?" he adds with a flirty smile, placing a hand on your shoulder.
Mystery nods his head at what the heart shape haired male said.
I pout, "I just want to be useful, I am your manager after all..."
Abby chuckles, "you are useful, pretty girl. You're taking care of us right now, buying us all these food. You've been a good girl for us." He praised as Jinu hums in agreement.
Your cheeks heated up, they always seem to like mentioning everyday that you've been a good girl and it never stops to make your heart skip a beat.
Such a good girl, you like touching my muscles, don't you?
Thank you, pretty girl. I'm so proud of my good girl.
Don't stop doing that, it feels good... that's right, good girl.
The next day came by and you were giddy, all excited that the others couldn't help but notice it when you came by for another day of dance rehearsals.
Abby moved to flex his muscles, intentionally growing closer to you as the thin shirt made his abs more prominent. "What's got you all excited?" He questioned with a raised eyebrow as he looked down at your form.
"Well yesterday... a guy asked me out!" You exclaimed, "He was sooo handsome and he has this british accent that it just made my heart melt!" You place a hand on your chest for good measure.
The others stopped whatever it is they were doing to look at you, an unreadable expression plastered on their faces before Jinu gave you a small smile which was obviously fake but you didn't notice, practically buzzing with excitement.
"Is that so? I'm happy for you!" He says as he gave you a pat on the shoulder.
"We're actually going at this restaurant in town tonight and I'm gonna be wearing the prettiest dress," You giggle as Mystery grits his teeth in annoyance, trying to stop himself from barking angrily at whoever's taking you out.
They can't believe you had the nerve to just go on dates with some nobody, you were their manager so that practically means you're theirs. So that pretty dress you own is reserved for their eyes only. Who cares if that guy has an accent? They know they're much better than whatever nobody you found on the streets.
The day rolls by, the Saja boys couldn't focus on whatever dance routine they had to do because they have one goal in mind;
getting rid of the bastard who had the audacity to steal their pretty girl.
It was easy trying to find the guy you were going on a date with because you told them his description and where you were meeting, oblivious to their plans. They know you wouldn't accuse them of doing something because you were dumb like that and they love it.
Jinu was dressed as a waiter that they ganged up on to steal his clothes and his soul while the rest waited outside in a dark alleyway. You were still at your apartment, getting all dolled up for this ugly nobody who could never compare to their majestic beauty.
How did you ever find this piece of shit handsome?
The raven haired male plastered on a fake smile as he approached Brandon who looked nervous and sweaty, Jinu was glad he came here extra early. "Hello, sir. I just wanted to inform you that a pretty, young lady is waiting for you outside." he said in perfect english as the ginger male looked up at him in surprise before nodding his head to stand up, following after him.
Brandon looked confused as he was led to a dark and secluded place, he looks around. "Uh, where-" he turns to face Jinu and lets out a gasp, seeing 5 pairs of glowing eyes- yellow embers with orange slits that are razor-thin- glaring down at him from the shadows.
The brit lets out a nervous chuckle, stepping back. "I-is this a joke, mate? It's not really funny..." He mutters before his back felt the dirty and cold stone wall.
"You really thought you could take her... from me? from us?" one of them growls as they moved closer to him.
"Don't bother screaming for help, no one's here but us." another whispers tauntingly before they all simultaneously pounced at the male who let out a scream with other people none the wiser.
"I- I got stood up..." You whimper, having just gone to the restaurant and waited for hours for the guy but he never game. "I waited for him but he didn't come..."
You were in their house, practically dashing over to them in tears. They bit back the smile as you melted into a puddle in Jinu's arms who coo-ed and rubbed your back gently as you cried.
"A-and I was all dressed up too... h-he's such a jerk!" You sobbed, hiding your pretty face in his chest.
"It's gonna be okay, [Your name]" Abby moves towards you, fingers moving to take your chin, tilting your head to look at him so that they could see your pretty face even with the make up running down due to your tears.
Romance gave you a smile, "Besides, you've got us. You don't need some other guy to go on a date with, we're here for you." He said softly. "Oh look, you're ruining your make up now... but don't worry, you're still the prettiest girl in the world."
Mystery nods, "And... being on some date with a nobody would only deter you from your job as our manager... who's gonna take care of us now if you're gonna go off going on a date.." he mumbled, trying to act all upset.
You sniffle, "y-you're right... I- I'm suppose to be your manager... you guys are my priority." you mumbled as you wipe your tears away but the crying never stopped.
They all smirked, unknown to you. That's right. They are your priority and no one else.
"So you better not be getting into some dates again," Baby reprimands with an annoyed huff.
I don't wanna be rude but ilia seems a little bit illiterate 😭? Idk it's probably bc he's bilingual but he can't speak English well and (allegedly) can't speak Russian well either so there's no language that he is is actually fluent in ☹️ like yeah we can say he communicates through his art form of skating but like,, he functionally can't verbalize his own thoughts and feelings and that sounds so lonely?!? Part of the reason his mental health might be so bad is because he doesn't have the words to describe how he feels :(
Ok omg anon you have no idea how much I laughed when I received this ask, you are RUTHLESS hahshhs Now I will answer because it does seem like this ask originates from a genuine wonder and not from hate.
I see where you're coming from — there's a heinous amount of videos of Ilia not knowing how to speak during interviews, or just jumbling up words and hoping for the best. I fear that's a him thing though, not being illiterate. I'll give you a few reasons which, in my opinion, explain a bit of this, and you'll tell me if you're convinced !
He's pr-pilled. Like every athlete who has a huge spotlight over them, they get through pr-training and all kind of go through the same process : the answers become repetitive, they're very vague not to cause any drama, they try to be as emotion and opinion-less as possible. Basically, his interviews have become more and more blank because of this pr-training — you'll notice how he's always using the same sentences, always talking about the same subjects, redirecting the questions in one way, etc. That's just how it is, pr is the death of expression and opinion, but people are so quick to bash him for anything he says that he kind of HAS to go along with it.
He's extremely camera-shy. I'm not kidding, he is absolutely incapable of speaking through an interview without the most cringe-worthy, awkward moment of a lifetime. That's just how he is, he's terribly ill at ease and everyone suffers second-hand embarrassment – that's part of the charm to me. That doesn't help his case either.
The videos of him speaking grammatically incorrect Russian are old : he's 12-13 in almost all of them. Watch any recent vid of him speaking Russian and you'll notice he's made huge progress. Many Russian-speaking athletes have said they prefer talking in Russian with him if they can, so obviously he understands and speaks the langage fairly easily. As for English, he is fluent in it since he was born in Fairfax Virginia – that's like, his mother tongue. That doesn't stop him from making mistakes here and there when giving interviews : I'm a french teacher and the kids in my class have learnt the language their whole life; do they still make a ridiculous amount of errors ? yes. Is it normal ? Yes to that too, that's just how it is, speaking a language with total ease is less common than we think.
Now, there's this wonderful interview of him where he talks about his writing, poetry and how he wants to articulate it into a skating program (which he did with « A Voice ») that I totally recommend watching – that's the most earnest and open he's been in an interview in quite some time. Speaking of earnest, the very first interviews after his free-skate at the Olympics are pretty raw too : he's perfectly articulate, and without the pr-veil, you'll find that words blooms as he speaks.
So yeah, he is more than perfectly able to verbalise how he feels wether it's in his native English or learnt Russian, I think the issue lies somewhere else, namely, the pr-barrier, the camera-shyness and the desire to stay true to a « script » that he is being more and more confined too as his popularity rises.
Also, I think he just throws words around sometimes and just waits for us to pick them up and put them back in order hahshs I'm not saying he's extremely eloquent because that would be a BIG lie, but he surely is not illiterate — if anything, I think it's quite the opposite.
Hi everyone! In my previous post, I analyzed why I think Philip was just as dependent on Howard as Howard was on him. At the end, I mentioned my own AU with yandere Philip.
So, here’s the idea: the events take place after an almost-good ending that took a wrong turn at the last moment. Howard successfully puts the Ancient One to sleep, but he dies in the process — either from the collapsing cave or from the injuries he sustained in the battle. In his panic, Philip might not even realize what happened at first, only trying to save himself and Howard from the collapsing cave. Or, for extra drama, Howard dies in Philip’s arms on the way out.
In the end, after Nessie eats Morose, Philip finally realizes that Howard is dead… and he loses his mind.
He had already struggled for a long time to accept his sister’s death. Even years later, the old framed photo in his room — worn and taken just a day before her death from an unknown illness — proves it. Honestly, I’m not even sure he ever fully accepted it. But everything he went through on the island, combined with the recent death of his friend, completely overwhelmed him. He had even helped the doctor with his experiments in an attempt to bring his sister back. At first, he wanted to work on medicines so that cases like his sister’s would never happen again. But after Samantha’s death, Morose became obsessed with completely defeating death, and he infected Philip with that obsession too. As Howard mentioned, Philip already had his own issues with God for unfairly taking his sister — something confirmed by his diary entries. Later, he realized the horror of what he was doing, started to regret it, and tried to stop Morose… but losing Howard became the final straw.
Do you really think he could just accept Howard’s death so easily? If he went that far just for his sister, whom he had lost long ago, then what will happen to him after losing the friend he unintentionally dragged into this — the friend who died because of him? Of course, Howard came to the island himself, but it was Philip who helped speed up the awakening of the Ancient One and was most likely Morose’s right hand (as I said in the previous post, he was probably the only living, unchanged person left on the island besides Angelique).
By that point, Philip’s sanity was already badly damaged: the experiments, the guilt, the influence of the stone (which also affected Morose, and Philip had spent a long time near him and, as mentioned in the game, was also under its influence before overcoming it), and the fact that he himself was almost turned into an experiment if not for Howard… One of the game’s endings, where he’s taken to a psychiatric hospital, shows this well (though the approaching end of the world might have been the final trigger for him). And even in the good ending where everyone survives, it’s not certain everything would be fine afterward.
In the end, Philip decides to bring Howard back at any cost. He returns to unethical methods (Philip thinks that since he’s already done it before, it can’t get any worse, and in any case, in his opinion, he’s definitely going to Hell — if it exists — for all his actions and complicity on the island. But for now, let him at least enjoy earthly life with his friend / the one he loves). He won’t awaken any more gods (once was enough, no thank you), but he might turn to smaller forces — local spirits, entities, or something that won’t destroy the world. Of course, this is highly unlikely after the first experience, but in extreme cases… he might.
P.s.s. I'm sorry that the post is repeating itself (I wanted to translate it into English so that more people would understand my point, but if you want, you can read it in the original) and if the post seems confused, as well as grammatically and punctuation incorrect. I use a translator.
The Japanese Pikmin website has character bios for the rescue corps that haven’t been localized by Nintendo nor the fandom (to my knowlage) so I did that.
There are translation notes in the read more!
Note 1:
In the original Japanese text, Shepards “hobbies” section isn’t a run on sentence because the joke (being that her hobby is “dogs”) works grammatically in Japanese. I hate incorrect grammar (which is ironic because there’s probably something wrong in one of these) but the joke was silly so I wanted to leave it in.
Note 2:
Something lost in translation (because it’d be extremely difficult to localize) was the way he speaks. You see in Japanese he speaks in very short sentences with a hiragana and katakana mix which is a dialect completely different from anyone else in the game (as well as the fact that uses the first person pronoun "ミー" which is something I've seen exactly once and seems to be some sort of gratuitous English occasionally used as an indicator that someone is a foreigner but don’t quote me on that.)
(The localization is actually pretty good though because words in katakana are occasionally used to convey emphasis on a word.)
TLDR: In Japanese he speaks in a style that’s more noticeably non-standard than in English and that’s an explanation of why.
Note 3:
I changed my switches language settings to Japanese to check this and I’m pretty sure that the “soulmate” bit in Bernard’s “relationships” section seems to be referring to Santi as when talking to him he will recount a time Bernard said this to him:
Which directly translates to “Oh! My soulmate! Long time no see!” However to my knowledge in Japanese the term soulmate isn’t always used in a romantic context unlike in English and even then, that’s just my best guess of what it’s referring to based off of context clues in game.
Anyways thank you for reading have a nice day or night I have school to go to tomorrow and I should probably be asleep right now.
The other thing about Wolf Hall… I just finished a reread. It’s shocking but I really truly don’t think she actually understood the difference between a comma, colon, and semi-colon. She seems to choose at random sometimes. When I first read it I was younger and thought that maybe my understanding of grammar wasn’t advanced enough o understand the nuance of what she was doing, but no. It’s just incorrect. Her weird aversion/phobia to writing in third person while writing in third person, too… the way she famously refuses to refer to Cromwell by name in the narration. She’s not good enough to pull it off. Sometimes context is enough that you can tell which “he” the sentence is referring to, even when it wasn’t the most recent “he” or the “he” who was the subject of the sentence, but often only after the fact, jarring you out of it and forcing you to go back, reread. Sometimes you just can’t tell. At least once she incontestably confused herself with unattributed dialogue and had one character speak twice/reply to himself—it’s a banter between Rafe and Richard, I believe. At least twice she incorrectly breaks dialogue into two paragraphs—the first paragraph fully enclosed in quotes—again, making you puzzle out who the fuck is speaking. She chooses moments when two random Marys are both participating in dialogue to stop referring to them with their surnames; now they’re just Mary and again, you have to use best judgement to decide who’s saying what. And yeah, Anne. It’s crazy because her take on the relationship between Anne and Cromwell was almost so interesting, but she doesn’t follow through, she’s too insecure or something to really explore her as a character. Going back, I couldn’t believe Anne and Cromwell never actually talk about religion. Especially cowardly because she props up these other female characters as models of “good” women… I really don’t think it’s a “Cromwell’s perspective” thing, though I’d wanted to. It’s crazy that she doesn’t really go anywhere with the idea of Anne Boleyn as a substitute for his daughter Anne… on reflection, I’m not sure she was actually aware of that like layer. Also annoying that the way she chooses to criticize the nobility is by portraying them as incurious and functionally illiterate… just lazy. They had all these books, they had all this education, that’s part of the point. Though that’s probably my smallest criticism. Biggest is that the writing is incoherent and grammatically incorrect. The worst part of all of this is that I still think she was actually talented and that the book is more good than bad, it’s just insane to me that the text in print is the final copy. I can’t believe no one sat her down about the pronoun game, at least. Wow, this is long. Sorry, I don’t have a book club 😂
Please never hesitate to send me long bookpinions because I enjoyed this very much! I had no idea it was so poorly written on a grammatical level lol I never got more than like half a chapter in.
I feel like once a litfic author gets their hands on a conceit, then they can never let it go--such as with the not referring to Cromwell by name, the weird mishandling of the dialogue, etc.--and once any person trying to write about a historical time period gets their hands on a schema (the nobility being incurious/uneducated/stupid/lazy vs. the smart and industrious self-made men) then there's no letting go of it (such as how you can only support Elizabeth I OR Mary Stuart, and if you pick a side, you have to characterize the other in a specific way). I do find the idea of the nobility as uneducated or stupid pretty egregious considering, at the highest level, Henry's extremely well-known desire to be considered a learned humanist to the point of his Assertio, and the equally well-known religious intellects of KoA, Anne B., and Catherine Parr, for example.
I do think I'd like to try reading it again at some point just to kind of know my enemy. I do kind of think, from the treatment of Anne and from some of what you talk about, that Mantel is a bit of a quiet misogynist lol (many such cases among the modern partisans interested in Henry's court incl. many other women) and I'd just like to know more about it and how she treats dfiferent historical characters.
Looking at last month's KD post, I was surprised to see I was already walking around my house largely without the aid of my leg brace. For some reason, it felt like a more recent development than that. However, I still need the brace to climb the stairs. The next step will be to not need the brace for that or when outside of the house, as distant of a goal as that may be. Much of this has to do with the impaired proprioception of my lower left extremity (basically, my brain can't always tell where my foot is or what it's doing, through it's MUCH better now than it was). This makes it difficult to walk in shoes without the brace, since the padding of the shoe means the sole of my own foot is not making actual contact with the ground. It's crazy how much I've learned about how the body works during this whole ordeal.
There's still a long and steep path ahead of me, but I try to remind myself that I push through these difficulties not for tomorrow, but for 3000 tomorrows from today.
It's perverse that nothing wants to kill you more than your own body. It's cliched but: take care of yours, it's the only one you're gonna get. Always think about where you might be in 3000 tomorrows, or even just 300. The best treatment is always prevention.
What I've Learned Since Last Time
I forget what led me to this the other day, it could have been a random gif, but I discovered the existence of Super Mario Logan (or SML).
This is probably a childhood memory for some of you out there, but, as a guy who grew up with Nintendo and Mario in their initial 80s/90s heyday, this kind of thing is completely alien to me, an absolute generational difference. But I think it's fascinating as a product of the Youtube of the 2000s, which must explain its millions of views.
Oh yeah, the Buffy the Vampire Slayer continuation was canned, which I think is a bummer. I was really looking forward to it and the leaked details/partial pilot synopsis don't seem as bad as feared and fit the tone of the original, which I rewatched in its entirety last year (it's still great overall).
Asks
My inbox is open again! I'm sorry it was closed for so long, but I really needed to hunker down on the story (see next section).
It's also come to my attention that some people are now using AI to write their asks; I have a zero tolerance policy for this. I would rather answer the sloppiest-written, most grammatically incorrect question produced by an actual person than ever waste my time dealing with this sludge. So if I detect AI use in an ask, you're blocked! End of story. It takes a lot of time and effort to make these posts, I expect the minimum effort in return from you.
TBF, I doubt it's many people doing this, plus I understand the people that do are still at least asking a fellow person and not relying solely on the AI, probably because the AI can't supply the very specific answers they seek.
Natural Delays
I still haven't gotten the Botox mentioned last month; I was almost certain it would have happened by now. Maybe by early April? I continue waiting....
And now the short story. It's not completely finished for today like I'd hoped but the first draft is complete! That's huge, but it still needs editing/proofreading and formatting for the page host. I'm thinking it will be released on a Saturday in the near future. But not this coming Saturday, as I'll be busy. Or the Saturday after, a friend is visiting. We all must continue waiting....
But I promise it's soon. So soon, in fact, I feel confident enough to share some more ideas about it and the overall project. This first story is titled "Grandpa" and is about/themed around Goetiamon #1 himself, Bael. And since the concept is to write Goetia stories in sequential numerical order, the first 10 or so demons of the list after Bael contain some big names, like Agares, Amon, Barbatos, Paimon, and Buer. I will attempt to make each one different, in genre or style. Not only that, I will be commissioning art for each story from the great artists in my orbit, like this:
^Chibi Bael Sketch by the one and only @duckpasta-kamonabe! (I have the finalized/color version, which I'm saving for when the story finally gets posted)
And to support the project/the work I do on this blog (which does take a lot of effort, especially typing with one hand) I am going to start a Patreon. I'm not going to post it until the story is ready to go, though. It's something I've wanted to do for at least 5 years now but never felt right asking for money for a silly blog that only posts about a silly video game series. This new creative endeavor (plus the art it will generate!) I think will be a much better pitch for support. Also, I wholeheartedly believe in creating NEW things made by humans and will carry a strong anti-Generative-AI mission statement. Phew! If this isn't all ready by the next KD installment, something must've gone very wrong!
How I Think the Demon Brother's would Comfort You (Part one)
Just some quick and most likely grammatically incorrect headcanons about how I personally view the demon brothers comforting you with getting overwhelmed or overstimulated. (I haven't played nightbringer, so this is for just the og game)
Lucifer:
He'd probably see you getting extremely overwhelmed and take you out of whatever situation you were getting panicked in. He'd probably be really gentle with you and go out of his way to not raise his voice to make it worse. He may not be great at it, but he's trying his best. He'd being you to his office where he could quietly get some work done while you just enjoy the quiet of the room, or ramble to him about what's going on. If you ask, he'd also let you sit in his lap.
Mammon:
This cutie patootie would have absolutely zero clue of what to do. He'd probably attempt to remove you from the situation to try and calm you down, but might unintentionally make it worse. If, however, you're getting particularly upset by a specific person? Well, he is definitely going to threaten them in some way to quiet the fuck down or leave you alone. He can't have someone hurting HIS treasure, can he?
Levi:
He has definitely been in the same boat. his social battery frequently runs out, so he has a lot of stuff to deal with over stimulation with him on the go, although most off which being gaming supplies. He'd probably hesitate, but let you use his expensive noise cancelling headphones "just this once." (Don't worry, he's a fucking liar. You can use them as much as you need)
Satan:
I donno, but something about this sweet man just screams comfort. He'd let you barge into his room either unannounced,or after texting him for some much needed comfort. His room is usually pretty quiet, but visually chaotic. So I wouldn't recommend going to him if you get overstimulated from lots of stuff going on visually. But he'd let you come in, and he'd offer to hold you while listening to him read to you. If you are okay with that, he'd hold you in his lap and quietly read whatever book he's working on out loud to you while gently rubbing your back.
I'll write for asmo, beel, and belphie another time. I need to go to sleep now. Enjoy silly neurodivergent mc headcanons.
So Flamethrower, the writer I have previously discussed in these analyses, has apparently decided to escalate her claims against the OTW, and also to explicitly threaten legal action against other individuals who have made accusations about her behavior.* This is very funny, in large part because, as I noted previously, she appears to have a habit of sprinkling her writing with legal terms and pseudo-legalese without actually understanding it. Her threats to pursue legal action are hilarious in their obnoxious mix of unearned confidence, self-righteous victimhood, and legal incompetence. We are going to go through her letter and point and laugh, and then we are going to get serious and discuss what purpose posting this letter actually serves.
*She does not name these individuals or identify their “accusations” in her letter, but based on the context it appears she is referring to individuals who documented her violations of AO3’s terms of service, accused her of racism and antisemitism, and (probably primarily) the individual who accused her of serious interpersonal abuse, as well as other individuals who have backed up those allegations and made further allegations of misconduct and abusive behavior.
(Please note: I am going to be discussing a number of legal issues while analyzing this letter. Nothing in this post is intended to be or should be construed as legal advice. Furthermore, I do not have specific expertise in Florida law - if someone who is more familiar with practicing in that state wants to chime in, I would be happy to make additions to this post.)
Always nice to start out with a grammatically incorrect salutation.
“I will be speaking to my lawyer” translates to, “I have not spoken to a lawyer.” It is generally a good idea, if you are going to make legal threats, especially legal threats against an organization with a vigorous legal department, ESPECIALLY if you then post those legal threats publicly, to speak to a lawyer before sending/posting anything.
In addition, “my lawyer” is interesting phrasing here. Generally, if you are referring to “my lawyer,” you are referring to a lawyer you have already retained (i.e. paid or promised to pay). If she has indeed already retained a lawyer, 1) it would seem to indicate she has significant funds available, 2) she has hired a scammer or a fool who thinks they can successfully get money out of the OTW, or 3) she has hired a biased friend who is working for free or a discount. And 4), either her attorney has foolishly given her the go ahead to both send this letter and post it publicly (which does not say much for that lawyer’s competence), or she is already working to undermine her attorney, possibly explicitly against that attorney’s advice. Alternatively, she’s deliberately misrepresenting the situation to make it seem like she has already found an attorney to pursue her cases when in fact she has not.
Now, in her second sentence, Flamethrower throws out some legal terms (slander, libel, and harassment) which she appears to be positioning as her legal claims against the OTW. The way she uses those terms, however, in both this sentence and throughout the letter, are going to require some unpacking.
First, there is no reason to separate libel and slander in this letter. They are two different forms of defamation, and while distinguishing which (or both) she is asserting would be important when filing a complaint,* there is no reason to not just say “defamation” here. It seems to indicate a mindset of “more legal words = good.”
*Since she at no point gives details as to what claims published or republished by the OTW are actually allegedly defamatory, it is possible that at some future date she could claim that some person she wants to sue expressed defamation verbally, as well as claiming they published defamatory claims on Fanlore.
Second, we need to talk about the ostensible purpose of sending a letter like this. Being extremely generous, we can call this an attempt by Flamethrower at a pre-litigation demand letter.* As part of a demand letter, a potential plaintiff generally needs to be able articulate the legal basis for the lawsuit or legal claim clearly enough to be actually claiming some potential cause of action** and demanding certain remedial action by the recipient.
*To quote from Cornell’s Legal Information Institute, “A demand letter is a letter, usually written by an attorney on a client’s behalf, outlining the dispute between the two opposing parties and demanding that the recipient of the letter take or cease a certain action…Demand letters usually state the harm the client has suffered, the relief they request and may threaten the sender’s intent to accelerate the dispute via a lawsuit if the recipient does not respond according.”
**In order to sue someone, you need to have a thing called a “cause of action.” A cause of action is, to quote again from Cornell’s LII, “a set of predefined factual elements that allow for a legal remedy.” What does that mean? It means to pursue a civil lawsuit, you need two things: (1) you need to be able to show that certain facts exist, and (2) that the law provides you with a legal remedy (damages, injunctive relief, etc.) if those facts exist.
So here, Flamethrower appears to be articulating that she plans to pursue (or, well, plans to discuss maybe potentially pursuing) two causes of action against the OTW - defamation and harassment.
But here’s the problem. Because of the way the legal system works in the USA, causes of action vary from state to state. If you want to sue someone for a particular cause of action in a particular state, first you need to make sure that the thing you are claiming the potential defendant did is actually something you can sue them for in the state you are suing. Flamethrower, by her own account, lives in Florida, and plans (or is claiming to plan) to file her legal action in Florida.* And while a claim of defamation is a cause of action in Florida, “harassment,” generally, is not. You can’t sue someone for “harassment” in Florida.**
*I am not going to address any of the potential issues with jurisdiction, venue, or choice of law that would certainly arise should the writer actually attempt to file a lawsuit against the OTW, given the specific provisions regarding those issues in the OTW's ToS. While these things would be extremely relevant to the viability and process of any actual lawsuit, this isn’t a serious legal threat, so analyzing them would be a pointless and boring diversion. I only mention them to highlight how non-serious this legal “threat” is.
**Generally speaking, if you want to scare someone with a bullshit threat full of pseudo-legalese, you will get further if you google “can I sue someone for “X” in “state” first, or you might end up embarrassing yourself.
Now that said, while Flamethrower clearly, just based on these first two sentences, has no idea what she’s talking about, we are going to be extremely generous. While you can’t sue someone for “harassment” in Florida, you can sue for Intentional Infliction of Emotional Distress (IIED), and it is possible that the “outrageous conduct” underlying an IIED claim could include harassment. We will give her the massive benefit of the doubt and assume that when she is threatening to sue the OTW for harassment, she actually means she is threatening to sue them for IIED.
So, let’s see if she articulates what OTW has done that may constitute defamation or IIED. If she does, we can analyze the elements of those claims to see if she might have a viable cause of action against the OTW.
*SIGH*
(And just to be clear before we proceed - I am not cutting anything out. There is more to her letter below these paragraphs, but these two paragraphs are the full sum and substance of her claims against the OTW as articulated in this letter.)
We are going to start by breezing right by the truly incredible phrase, “harboring a Fanlore page,” other than to note again the inappropriate use of a pseudo-legal term for no other apparent reason than to try to boost her credibility and make the letter sound more “legal,” as well as the inappropriate use of “slander” to refer to a written wiki page. Instead, we are just going to see if there is anything in here to support a claim of defamation or of IIED. We are also going to be extremely generous in our analysis, and not require that she show, at this stage, some evidence of every element (e.g. I’m going to ignore the complete lack of claim of any damages due to any conduct by the OTW (or by anyone else), which would be an essential element to both these claims).
Flamethrower’s entire claim in this letter against OTW is that they have included, in a wiki page about Flamethrower, “allegations” and “falsehoods.” Unfortunately for us, Flamethrower fails to specifically identify any false claims on her Fanlore page. This is fatal both to her claim insofar as this letter is concerned and to our ability to analyze the viability of her planned litigation (or rather, the plan she might make after actually talking to a lawyer). Instead, since I am not going to go through the elements of defamation for every sentence on her page, I’m just going to describe the elements of defamation and then talk about her Fanlore page in broad terms. Should she actually give specifics for her claim at a later date, I will review her allegations at that point.
Broadly speaking, a defamation claim contains five elements: (1) a false statement purporting to be factual, (2) about the plaintiff, (3) communicated to a third party, (4) negligence in stating (or repeating or republishing) the fact, and (5) some damage or harm done as a result of the false statement. (This can be complicated in various ways and can vary from state to state, and the mens rea is different if the plaintiff is a public figure. But we are keeping this VERY basic for the purposes of this analysis.) As I already stated, we are going to ignore her failure to state any damages, and there is no debate that the information on the page is about Flamethrower and communicated to third parties.
So then, is any of her Fanlore page potentially false statements purporting to be factual? And if so, was OTW negligent in publishing (or republishing) them? Well, again, I’m not going to go through every single line of the page. But looking at the page as a whole, it seems like there would be serious problems with any attempt to claim defamation. First, many (if not most) of the statements on the page are clearly opinions. E.g., when the page refers to “the use of antisemitic jokes in Flamethrower's Harry Potter series "Of a Linear Circle”,” the question of whether the jokes were antisemitic is, legally speaking, a matter of opinion. Second, when the page makes factual claims (e.g. stating that Flamethrower said a quote or took an action), it generally links to clear evidence supporting that claim. Finally, while the page does contain a number of unsupported claims by mostly anonymous or pseudonymous individuals, these are either clearly marked as allegations or are contained in a section entitled “Reaction from other fans.” In order to try to use those claims to support a defamation suit against the OTW, Flamethrower would have to argue that those clearly marked allegations and reactions were published in such a way that the OTW was actually presenting them as factual (and that they were, in fact, false).
Furthermore, it’s worth noting here that while Flamethrower complains about the fact that her page is admin-locked, a review of the history of the page shows it was locked in order to *protect* Flamethrower, potentially cutting against any argument of negligence on the part of the OTW *even if* the page contains false factual statements.
That is to say, she included evidence that appears to undermine her own claim in her letter for absolutely no reason (no legal cause of action is created if a user-edited wiki admin-locks a page to protect the subject of that page).
Before we move on, let’s take a quick look at IIED. There are four elements of IIED in Florida: (1) whether a defendant engaged in “extreme and outrageous conduct,” (2) either intending to cause severe emotional distress or with reckless disregard for the high probability of causing severe emotional distress, (3) the plaintiff experienced severe emotional distress, and (4) the extreme and outrageous conduct was a legal cause of the severe emotional distress. Under Florida law, “extreme and outrageous conduct,” to quote the Florida Bar’s civil jury instructions, “is behavior, which, under the circumstances, goes beyond all possible bounds of decency and is regarded as shocking, atrocious, and utterly intolerable in a civilized community.” While again, harassment might rise to this level of conduct, Flamethrower has utterly failed to allege any actual instances of harassment (or any other specific action) committed by the OTW (or by anyone else) that appear to rise to this level. Furthermore, once again, her own inclusion of the fact that her page is admin-locked would undermine her claim, since locking the page to prevent it from “veer[ing] into attack page territory” cuts directly against the necessary mens rea for an IIED claim. And again, while I’m going to be generous and ignore the fact that for now, she failed to state her actual damages, I will note for the benefit of those reading along that “severe emotional distress” isn’t just feeling bad; to quote again from the Florida Bar’s civil jury instructions, it is emotional distress that is so severe that “it is of such intensity or duration that no ordinary person should be expected to endure it.”
The first thing Flamethrower should discuss with her lawyer is whether or not she actually has a potentially viable case, before she thinks about sending additional letters.
Also, at no point does she say what she wants the OTW to actually Cease and Desist *doing*. Presumably she will say so in her Cease and Desist letter (should one actually be sent), but then what is the point of this letter? All she says is that the OTW “willing participated in a harassment campaign” but as we went through above, she doesn’t say why or how, other than having a page that includes reports of (some of) the allegations against her.
But here we come to the second attempt at a legal threat in this letter - not only is she threatening to sue the OTW, she is threatening to report the OTW for criminal harassment. Now, she is correct that harassment is a crime in Florida. Its definition and punishment is contained within Florida’s more general stalking charge (Fla. Stat. § 784.048). So let’s look at the relevant sections from that statute.
(Section (1)(c) is about threats and isn’t relevant here, as no threats against Flamethrower are contained in the OTW page or alleged to have occurred at any point.)
Does anything Flamethrower accuses the OTW of doing rise to the level of Harassment or Cyberstalking as used in this statute? NO! Clearly not! I could break down all the elements in detail, but the most important thing is that the course of conduct and/or communication that is alleged to be harassment must serve “no legitimate purpose.” Documenting allegations against Flamethrower and the reactions by the community may not serve a purpose that Flamethrower likes or agrees with, but they serve a legally legitimate purpose. In addition, while I can’t speak to whether any individual prosecutor’s offices in Florida may choose to “prosecute out of state offenders regarding this violation of the law,” that’s not really the relevant issue here? Because private citizens like Flamethrower are free to *report* what she believes to be a harassment crime to the authorities, but she cannot make them prosecute such an offense. Ultimately, even if she attempts to report the OTW for harassment for, again, keeping a wiki page documenting allegations against her and reactions by fans to those allegations, it will be up to the state to decide whether to pursue a case.*
(*Some states do allow individuals to file criminal complaints, but the prosecutor’s office will almost always still review those complaints and will be responsible for deciding whether to pursue or drop those cases. Regardless, Florida is not such a state and only the State may file criminal charges in Florida.)
That’s not the way any of this works! While a corporation can be charged with crimes, you can’t get an injunction for protective relief against a corporation the same way you can against an individual for things like harassment. Instead, if you bring a civil suit, you can request a temporary restraining order during the pendency of the suit, and can request injunctive relief if you win the civil case. So even if she were to seek (not deliver - you need to seek an injunction and have it granted before you can get it delivered) an injunction against the OTW, it would not be the first step toward anything; it would be several steps after filing a lawsuit. And again, Flamethrower cannot “fil[e] criminal harassment charges” against the OTW; only the State can file such charges.
Now, there is something else going on in this paragraph, and another kind of injunctive relief Flamethrower may be referring to seeking, not against the OTW, but against those other unnamed “participating harassment [sic] parties.” But we will set that aside for the moment and come back to it later.
Flamethrower has included her name in the sign-off of her publicly posted letter, but in the interests of avoiding bad-faith accusations of sharing her personal information, I will not include it here. Rather, I want to end this section by pointing out that although she says she hopes “this matter can otherwise be resolved swiftly,” she doesn’t provide any request or demand to the OTW that would indicate how it could be resolved! I called this a pre-litigation demand letter, but such a letter (1) needs to state a claim or harm, which as we’ve discussed, she doesn’t, and (2) needs to demand some action, and Flamethrower doesn’t do that anywhere in this letter! She doesn’t even ask the OTW to remove or hide her Fanlore page! This isn’t really a demand letter, because it’s not demanding any action. The OTW couldn’t respond to her request to “resolve” the matter even if they wanted to, because she doesn’t request anything!
So now that we have pointed and laughed, let’s get serious and look at what purposes this letter could *actually* be serving. Although it is ostensibly written to the OTW, as discussed, it doesn’t demand any action from the OTW or point to any specific thing the OTW allegedly did; it just expresses anger that the OTW republished unspecified “allegations” and “accusations” that were allegedly part of a “group-led harassment” campaign. And Flamethrower didn’t just send this letter to the OTW; she published it publicly, on her blog. While I cannot know what is in Flamethrower’s mind, we can make some reasonable guesses as to the letter’s real purposes, based on its content and context.
The actual purpose of posting a letter like this is twofold, with two different audiences. One audience is her current True Believers, followers, and friends. The other audience is those other unnamed “participating harassment [sic] parties” we set aside earlier.
The purpose at letter like this serves to her current followers and friends is to reinforce both her victimhood and her authority. While her misuse of legal terms and pseudo-legalese is hilarious to anyone with minimal legal knowledge and is reading the letter with any degree of skepticism, for people who are already inclined to believe or trust her because she is their friend or they are a fan of her work, the use of these terms can make her seem more authoritative. Legal rights and issues are complicated, frequently obtuse, and many, if not most, people don’t fully understand them. People who use legal language confidently (even if they do not do so correctly) can use it to gain a veneer of intelligence* and expertise.
*Please note: I am only noting the assumed cultural connection between intelligence and use of legal language, not endorsing this assumption; the ability to understand legal language and concepts is not related to intelligence in any way.
Furthermore, by asserting to her followers that she will (or already has) contacted legal counsel, and that her complaints about the OTW and her other accusers rise to the level of civil and criminal liability, she is creating the impression that her complaints must be very serious and very real. This is a very common phenomenon: consider, if you read a headline stating “Celebrity X claims Y National Newspaper is lying about them,” vs a headline claiming, “Celebrity X prepares to sue Y National Newspaper for libel,” the later headline makes it seem like Celebrity X has a much stronger and more serious claim against Y National Newspaper, more like Celebrity X has been wronged in some way.
And her followers are demonstrably receiving the impression she is trying to send. For example, see this comment on her post of the letter:
In a separate posts, the same commenter repeats that the (still unspecified) accusations are “libelous,” quotes a definition of libel that they think is the “legal definition” but which merely defines libel as a form of defamation without defining or giving the elements of defamation, and says that they would personally be “happy to testify” (without apparently having any sense of what they could possibly be testifying about). By bringing the threat of legal action into the conversation, Flamethrower has successfully created the impression that the OTW/her accusers have committed some legally actionable offense against her.
The second purpose this letter serves is to attempt to threaten and intimidate the other audience for this letter, those unnamed “participating harassment [sic] parties.” These “parties” would appear to be, as previously indicated, the people who have, are, or are considering making allegations about the writer. The threat to these individuals in the letter is clear from the letter, despite the fact that it is ostensibly addressed to the OTW, not only because Flamethrower repeatedly brings up that she believes this is “a hate campaign” by her accusers, but because of the specific kind of legal action she is threatening. To repeat the relevant paragraph in her letter:
As stated above, you can’t get an injunction for protective relief against a corporation for things like harassment. However, Florida law does allow an individual to apply for an “injunction for protection against stalking,” which would include cyberstalking (Fla. Stat. § 784.0485). With that knowledge in mind, it appears that the only actual legal threat in this letter is, ironically, a threat to harass her accusers with baseless petitions for protective orders.
And again, her followers and friends received the message loud and clear. Flamethrower reblogged a post from the same commenter whose post I mentioned above, which names one of Flamethrower’s accusers (@jabberwockypie) in the post and tells her to “Get a lawyer.”
Now, on the one hand, this is very funny. Based on this letter and all publicly available evidence, Flamethrower has no viable grounds for an injunction for protection against any of her accusers. Among other considerations, even if some of her accusers are lying about her, “injunctions are not available to stop someone from uttering insults or falsehoods.” Logue v. Book, 297 So. 3d 605, 614 (Fla. Dist. Ct. App. 2020).*
*(Also, if I may offer Flamethrower some personal advice, I would recommend that she discuss with her attorney the possibility that, should she proceed with filing litigation, those individuals may in turn file malicious prosecution claims against her once they defeat her facially frivolous claims. Again, this isn’t legal advice, but if I were thinking about filing malicious and baseless legal claims, especially when I have published a letter online admitting that the purpose of initiating such litigation would be to force my accusers to personally come to my state to appear in court, I would want to consult with a qualified attorney to get legal advice on this point.)
On the other hand, this is a despicable threat designed to frighten and intimidate people who allege they have been harmed by her into silence. Even in the unlikely scenario that Flamethrower manages to convince a lawyer to attempt to initiate litigation against the OTW, the OTW will be fine. The OTW has money and resources and legal counsel and will chew her up in court and destroy her without so much as a blip. However, if she files petitions for injunctions for protection against her accusers, even if those petitions are baseless, those accusers would have find a way to appear in court and find the resources for legal counsel themselves. Indeed, based on the above quoted paragraph, forcing her accusers to travel to Florida to appear in court would appear to be her main goal in filing such a petition.
In short, Flamethrower is attempting to bully her accusers with threats to file meritless legal claims against them, specifically so that those accusers will have to spend the money and resources to travel in person to Florida to fight those claims. Even if she does not actual file a petition, she will have achieved her purpose if she can make her accusers (or other potential accusers) fear such a petition may be filed, causing them anxiety and possibly chilling their speech.
She is using the threat of the legal system to attempt to bully people who have spoken out against her. It is, on a much smaller and clumsier scale, an attempt at the same kind of behavior we see with powerful figures like Harvey Weinstein who threaten to sue any accusers, and any paper who reports on those accusers, into silence.
And - by the way. If she does follow through on her threat to attempt to file baseless injunctions for protection (or any other civil suits) against individuals in order to harass and bully them, I will be happy to boost fundraising links and provide other assistance to those individuals as necessary, and I am sure many other people will be as well, to make it clear that our community will not stand for such behavior. Because despite what Flamethrower asserts, I believe that the fan community does despise vindictive bullying - it’s just that we recognize that she is the bully, not the victim.
