I've learned a lot about novel writing over the last few years, especially as an AuDHD self-published author. I keep seeing a lot of the same stuff over and over on social media, and I have a lot of thoughts about it
And because I'm having a "everyone's wrong on the internets" kind of day, I'm going to write it all down. Take what you like, leave the rest:
One person's trash is another person's treasure. This is the big one and the hardest one I had to learn as an author. Not everyone's going to want to read or like my book. That's just how it is, and really, that's ok. Everyone has different tastes when it comes to what they like to read. Just because someone doesn't read or like your book, doesn't mean your writing is shit. All it means is that your story wasn't for them.
Adjacent to that: Just because a friend or family member doesn't read your book, it doesn't mean they don't support your writing. They just may not be interested in the genre you're writing in, or they're not big readers, etc. I'm super lucky and grateful that both my Wife and my Mom both like the genres I write in AND are big readers, but a lot of my friends and family haven't read anything I've written. Again, it just means that my stuff wasn't for them, it doesn't mean my writing sucks.
Don't let just anyone read your first drafts. Vet your first (alpha) readers like a good therapist. They need to a) want to read the genre you write in and b) be able to give critique about the draft without being cruel. Your first readers DO NOT need to bludgeon your mental health to help you write better.
Find a good editor (or beta readers) under the same criteria that you'd use for a first reader. Again, people who edit your work to any degree DO NOT need to bludgeon your mental health to make you write better.
You don't necessarily need to break the bank to find a good editor or cover artists for self publishing. I can tell you that there are a lot of editors and artists floating around who need work. Ask your author friends for referrals. Go to the Writing & Reading, Co-working, and Artist categories on Twitch and poke around. Check r/HungryArtists on reddit. Be honest about your situation with a potential new editor/artist and ask if they can work with you. Maybe you can do some sort of payment plan, or some sort of work-trade, or a mixture of both. DO make sure you come up with a fair and equitable solution, though, and DO make sure you have a contract that allows either of you to leave the situation if it isn't working out. Ask your artist/editor/freelancer friends about how to write these. I can guarantee that someone you know will know someone who can help you.
Don't worry about whether your story is "original enough" or if it's been "done before." Sure, the concept you have for you story may not be something brand new, but it'll be unique because it's *your* story and *your* voice. There will be someone out there who will read it and your story will be important to them. (See point #1.) You never know, your story may even save a life.
Adjacent to #6: Don't worry about bullshit things like "Mary Sue/Stu" or tropes, or anything like that. Lots of what we consider classics these days have some or all of these tropes in it. Just because you self-inserted doesn't automatically mean your story sucks. Just because you have a trope or whatever doesn't mean your writing sucks. Good lord, have you read some of those classic American literary novels??? (I am so NOT a Hemingway/Faulkner/etc fan. Talk about tropes and self-inserts...)
Your first draft isn't always complete shit, and you DO NOT have to hate your first draft. You will, always, always, always have to edit it, however. Multiple times.
You DO NOT have to attend a writing workshop, participate in a writing group, or traditionally publish to be a "legit" writer. This is especially important for my neurodivergent folks, because a lot of writing groups, online or in person, follow a format that has been known to be cruel, racist, and shit for marginalized/neurodivergent authors. I'm not saying that ALL writing groups are like this, but honestly, follow #2, 3, and 4 for writing groups, too. Ask if you can observe a meeting or observe the Discord/online group for a bit before committing fully. If they've got people there who are being gatekeepers about what writing is legit or not, run, don't walk, to the nearest exit.
Adjacent to #9: If you're a fanfic writer, or just write for fun, and you post your story somewhere where the general public can consume your writing, then you are a published, legit author. Just because you don't get money for your writing doesn't mean you aren't a "real writer."
And on that note: If you're writing to get rich, you might want to reconsider. No one truly knows how or why certain books will sell or get famous, just like marketers don't truly know why certain ads will work one day and fail the next. Most books that get famous quickly are either done by folks who already have a large following, are already celebrities, or plain dumb luck. And if you try to "write to market" just because some so-called writing guru said so, are you truly writing *your* story?
And finally, since my grah is starting to slow down and my head is emptying: There is no "one true way" to write a story. Anyone who tells you that you must do X, Y, Z to write a good story is lying to you. Do you like to make detailed outlines that are about the same number of words as your finished novel? Then do that. Are you a consummate pantster and allergic to anything smacking of an outline? Fine,. Are you somewhere in between? Then do that. Only really write between midnight and 4 am? Have to write on your iPad while lying flat on your back? Prefer to use fountain pens and write the entire novel by hand before typing it up? Great! All of these are legit ways to write a novel. Do whatever you have to do to get your story written, my friend. DO NOT let anyone else tell you can't write it because you didn't write it the way they think someone should write a novel. Honestly, pretty much all of the writing advice out there is suggestion, not Holy Writ. You are not beholden to some amorphous Writing Cabal that decides who is and isn't worthy of slapping some words together and calling it a story.
Only YOU can write your story.
YOU are in charge of how that gets written.
There is NO "one true way."
