Papa Arc: So you say you love my son, but how do I know you love him?
Neo: Oh, dearest father in law, have I ever told you the story of the 'Pineapple woman'?
Papa Arc: The 'Pineapple woman'? No, what's that?
Neo: Their was a woman who laid her hands on my love, your son, once.
Papa Arc: Really, what did you do? Beat her up?
Neo let's out a silent chuckle as she crossed one leg over the other, all the while a champagne glass was in her hand, taking a small sip she continued.
Neo: No, physical pain was far too easy for her. People heal from that, you know how they say; 'fear not those who can kill the body but cannot kill the soul' .
Papa Arc: So you...killed her soul?
Neo: You'd be surprised to hear how ubiquitous pineapples are within our world... We never really notice cause we don't look for them.
Neo takes another sip of her champagne.
Neo: But once you start looking (smirks), they're everywhere.
Papa Arc: What are you talking about?
Neo: People are ignorant to the fact at how closely we tread how thin the line is between sanity and insanity.
Papa Arc just looks at her with an eyebrow raised.
Neo: Now, of course... I pushed those boundaries with that would be thief, and it all started when I placed a single pineapple in front of her porch, of course, when she opened her doors she is confused but only for a couple of seconds, she actually took the pineapple in and even ate it.
Papa Arc: So you...poisoned the pineapple.
Neo just gives another silent giggle.
Neo: Nope, as I said, a physical malady would be far too easy for this woman... instead, she would find with increasing frequency pineapples at places she would always visit.
Neo: You see, the mind is an expert at pattern recognition. So exquisitely so that it can find patterns that aren't even there!
Neo: So if you want to suggest a pattern, all the mind needs is a push in the right direction, and it shall find a path on its own.
Papa Arc: O-okay, so what did you do?
Neo: What I did was simple, really. I would place a pineapple like I did with her porch, but instead, I would place it in her locker or her favorite bench. I remember even putting it on her windowsill in her dorm once. She did a double glance, but within that second, I made sure it wasn't there. All to suggest to her mind that she~
Papa Arc: Was going insane... my god.
Neo: Yes~. Funny enough, I no longer had to place pineapples anymore like I said there everywhere in our world. We just never see them because we don't look for them. Seek, and you shall find~
Neo took another sip this one a bit long and dragged out as Papa Arc just wondered what the hell his son got himself engaged to.
Neo: annnd oh did my girl seek~
Neo: It was by pure chance really that her five year anniversary for her work was coming up, and what did her company give her for her loyalty... a fruit basket with a pineapple as the center piece!
Papa Arc could only gulp at the crazed look on Neo's face.
Neo: I heard the breakdown was biblical. Of course, she lost her job, and then when she came home to gain comfort from her lover, I'm which the psychotic weight was too much for them to handle, they broke up, she was all alone and so she tried to find comfort within her family and they cut ties as well cause nothing she said made sense!
Neo: So now she was all alone in this world, and I knew this was my perfect chance to deliver the final blow in which it came in the form of a strong courageous man, a white knight, nothing like that of my sweet Jaune but a sweet heart still.
Neo: He whispered sweet nothings in her ear. Nothing but pure acceptance, no judgment for all her shortcomings. Loving her for who she is~
Neo: And at night, when they did what lovers do, oh, how surprised was she to hear that his safe word was...
A dark and evil smile stretched across Neo's face.
Neo: I hear that the crime scene was quite hellish... two huntsman couldn't even contain their lunch!
Neo: I unraveled her at the seams...funny that all it took was a pineapple.
Papa Arc: W-welcome to the family!
Just then, Jaune walks in.
Jaune: Oh hey hun, hey dad, oh here I brought us some snacks.
Jaune pulled out a small zip lock bag containing some...
Jaune: Want some pineapples, dad?
Papa Arc: Uh, no, son, actually I gotta go. Your mom needs some help with a thing. Bye!
Papa Arc briskly got up and walked away much to Jaune's confusion but he just shrugged all the while Neo leaned her head onto Jaune's shoulder and sigh in contentment as she reached in to zip lock bag of pineapple slices, she giggled once more.
