Honestly if I was batsis I'd pretend to have a crush on the batboys close friends(excluding Damian because he and Jon are still babies) just to annoy them. Jason bring Roy over? Suddenly I'm very interested in his tattoo's and I want to know all about archery. I catch kon in the kitchen in Tim? Suddenly i'm very into the conversation they're having and am making eye contact a lot with Kon. I feel liked they'd do something like this;
Batsis: You know I really like your tattoos.
Roy: Oh thanks.
Jason: ... You gotta go, like, now.
Roy: What-
Brilliant, anon!! What a great idea!! This was very fun to write :)
(don't mind the spelling mistakes please lol. i am tired out of my mind)
For starters, when Bruce first introduced the members of the Justice League to you (it took a lot of convincing), you just couldn’t help but flirt with them.
I mean, just LOOK at Aquaman. The moment you laid your eyes on him, you felt a spark. He hadn’t noticed you staring, but surely he had felt it too. Bruce, however, had noticed you staring. He didn’t seem particularly amused, almost as though he saw you daydreaming about your wedding with Aquaman. Just when you were making your way over to them, Bruce scowled and swiftly led Aquaman away. After that, you never saw him ever again…
Or that one time when Green Lantern came over. Wow. What a man. You didn’t waste a second walking up to him and introducing yourself. The giggles you were suppressing nearly slipped out after you saw Bruce’s eye twitch. Green Lantern entertained your advances, though you knew he wasn’t interested in you. Whenever Bruce started with his, “Hal. We should leave”, you would always interrupt him with more questions directed at Hal.
“So…do you like pasta? I’m actually really good at making it. You should come over, you know? I could treat you!” You all but winked at him.
Hal found it very interesting, don’t get him wrong, he thought you were very funny, but when Bruce is standing right there beside him, he felt…intimidated. So intimidated, in fact, that he can barely reply to your questions.
“Oh…um…” he nervously glanced at Bruce. “Green. You know what, kid? Your father and I have some business to attend to…so…see you next time. Good luck with the um…yeah, never mind.”
Hal sped off, leaving you and Bruce alone. You had been in the mood to laugh until your father turned to you with a serious expression. Suddenly you weren’t in the mood to laugh anymore. To put it simply, it was a clear warning: Don’t do it again, his look communicated.
Now, Constantine, he was fun to hang around with, likely because he isn’t as scared of Batman as the rest is. And also, he’s hot. “You are so cool, honestly. It’s really impressive how often you’ve escaped death”, you leaned against the wall. To be honest, you weren’t even listening to what he was saying, all you needed to hear was his strong English accent and little sprinkles of humor.
After some bribery, you had gotten Tim to tell you that Bruce was most concerned about you meeting Constantine. For some reason, you figured…
“So…I like older men, what about you?”, you batted your eyelashes at him. You didn’t have Bruce in your periphery, as you were focusing on John, but you could imagine him shaking in fury.
“Yeah, I like older men too”, he replied nonchalantly. Dammit, he got you. Well, he was a funny guy.
Bruce seemingly relaxed at that, but that’s not to say that he was satisfied with the interaction taking place. “You’re funny, are you single-”, you could barely finish your sentence before Dick dragged you away to spend time with you. Though, you believe that Bruce asked Dick to get you away just so you couldn’t talk to Constantine like that.
Bruce had way too many attractive friends. Well, almost all his friends were attractive: Wonder Woman, Superman, Flash…hell, even Martian Manhunter. I mean, he can read minds! Just imagine the potential…
“So, I heard you can read minds. Read mine right now”, your grin was…suspicious. Bruce couldn’t read minds like J’onn could, but he could imagine what you were thinking about. No, actually, he didn’t want to imagine it.
“J’onn.”, Bruce, ever so stern, called out and gestured towards the door. The J’onn in question had merely walked off in that direction silently, as though having understood Bruce’s point from one word. Martian Manhunter hadn’t read your mind that day, to your dismay. However, you had managed to make Bruce uncomfortable, so that was considered a win.
Dick himself had very attractive friends. Wally West, quite the flirt, was among them. Though, oddly enough, you had imagined him to be more flirty. It couldn’t be that Dick took a page out of Bruce’s book and told him to watch it, right?
“So, you’re fast, huh?”, you looked Wally up and down. “I happen to be”, Wally glanced at Dick.
“Okaayyyyy, Wally, you should leave”, Dick spoke with a strained smile.
“Yeah. Oh, by the way, what about the-”
Wally looked around awkwardly, “…right.”
And Raven—what a woman. Plus, Cyborg and Starfire filled your thoughts. Though Wally was the first and last friend of Dick’s you ever saw. A pity. He seemed to have learnt his lesson…
Now Roy Harper, Jason’s friend, was quite something. Tattoos? Archery? Hell yeah.
“Wow, so you like engineering books? Well, the manor has a huge variety. You should come by more often”, you smiled innocently.
“Um, actually, he will NOT be coming over ever again”, Jason frowned at your words.
“Why not?”, both you and Roy turned to Jason.
“BECAUSE I said so”, you and Roy made eye contact awkwardly.
“You”, Jason points at Roy, “Get out.”
“What? But you said you needed my he-”
“NOWWWW. Do NOT make me repeat myself.”
Yeah, Roy leaving was more awkward than anything else that had happened so far.
Jason didn’t have that many friends, as far as you knew at least. In other words: You would never see Roy ever again…
Now Tim, being charming himself, had many attractive friends.
For starters: Conner Kent.
You hadn’t had much contact with the Kents, however Conner had come over a few times. And wow. Despite being overly confident (and often obnoxious), he was very, very attractive. However, you have never talked to him. The reason? Tim makes sure he keeps you at arm’s length. In fact, you’re not sure you could ever find a way to interract with Tim’s friends…unless…
“Hey, Tim!”, Jason called out, “Bruce says you need to go to the cave right now.”
“What? But I have guests over…”, Tim eyes Jason suspiciously.
“I mean, if you wanna get in trouble with him, be my guest”, Jay raised his hands defensively.
“I-…fine. Conner, just a second, I will be right back. DO NOT move”, Tim sighs.
After Tim left, you shot Jason a thumbs-up and went to mingle with Superboy.
“Good evening. You must be Conner. I’ve heard a lot about you from Tim”, you say, taking it slow.
“Good evening! Hopefully you only heard good things!”, he grins.
“Oh, plenty of good things. Say, if you really can fly, then why don’t you take me for a ride? I haven’t ever seen the sky from…well, up in the sky”, you copied his grin.
“Ah, well, I would, really, but I’m not sure how Tim would feel, you know? I mean, he’s a bit of a-”, Conner started.
“A bit of a what.”, a new voice shocked the both of you.
Tim. Where the hell did he come from?
“I though I told you to leave if they started talking to you?”, Tim ignored you, only focusing on scolding Conner.
“Well, that would’ve been incredibly rude…”, Conner struggled to defend himself.
“You.”, Tim turns to you.
“Me?”, you said, though you weren’t scared of him anymore.
“Yes, you. What’s the big idea? Why did you pull that just to talk to Conner? I don’t know what you have planned, but forget it immediately. If you don’t leave right now, I’ll tell Bruce to reinstate the therapy sessions. Then you can explain to him why you enjoy sabotaging others so much.”
That was, quite frankly, terrifying. You hadn’t been this scared of Tim in a while.
Well, safe to say you won’t be doing this again…