i’m in a mood ,
torn between wanting to convey imagery which coincides with my aestheticism but also wanting my writing to be accessible and not this abstract , uncommunicative agency which ultimately impedes interaction . realistically , i know the choice is mine : but i feel like i’m sacrificing in part my individualism — like this mode is essential to my being , ( when it’s not ) ? an unwelcoming anxiety that if i employed any other degree of language it would betray both my abilities and be a shortcut . it’s a horrific conclusion : the need to separate my ego from the art itself , to enable myself to truly transverse literary fields without feelings of inadequacy , help .
