#saeitoshi

[ninjaqueen120k]

The Blue Lock Believix Wings Special Speedix Wings Commission Open Pack 1 Adoptable 🧚‍♀️🌈✨ Is Here!!! Link In This Description.

Believix Wings Special Items Adoptable Lists:

1. Isagi Yoichi (Lime Green)

2. Chigiri Hyoma (Pink)

3. Meguru Bachira (Yellow)

4. Rin Itoshi (Turquoise)

5. Nagi Seishiro (Dark Grey)

6. Reo Mikage (Purple)

7. Kunigami Rensuke (Orange)

8. Sae Itoshi (Red Magenta)

Requested by: @lesaraxdragon

[krnsluvvie]

love at first, love at second, love at last

veinticinco: finalmente, tuyx (wc: 2,2k)

SUMMARY: sae had chosen his career and that was shortly followed by his and y/n's separation. three years pass by and amongst all the lurking and stalking each other's socials, sae is suddenly found back in their hometown. old feelings are resurfaced, current ones are questioned and a whole load of future ones are found in a blur.

veinticuatro | masterlist |

Your results have come out and you were sitting cross-legged in your room, shaking with fear and anticipation. To say you've been on edge would only be an understatement; both Isagi and Kurona knew they would be getting dealt with the Devil reincarnated himself and thus, actively avoided you. You closed your eyes then as you rubbed your temples, seeing them turn around the corner, I can't really blame them. 

You keep opening and closing the laptop as if that would help you with your current predicament. It's been done with, what else do you have left? You either face it and take it like a real alpha that you are or you end up crying about it to your friends–as if they haven't been dealing with… everything you've served them. Willingly or unwillingly.

Your phone dings and you check the sender: Sae. With a silly smiley face.

After the grand revelation, you couldn't help but think about how repressive you were regarding your feelings. That explained your random outbursts and terrible mood swings. You really just had to come clean with it. To yourself.

how did you do?

The text is how it usually is. All lowercase, sounding anything but interested. You swallow down the lump that starts to create in your throat and start typing.

haven't checked them yet

You throw your phone back on the bed as you face your laptop. The worst thing is repeating a year. You mumble this under your breath while typing the website into the browser. It soon becomes a mantra–to redirect your mind elsewhere, to have your mind preoccupied.

The screen turns momentarily white after you finish logging in. Relief washes over you but it gets cut rather short when your face pales upon seeing the loading sign appear. Your eyes don't look away in time as they zero in on the percentage. You knew when you saw it but was curious to see the details. Maths got you real fucked up but hey, no more seeing any of that after all of this. 

You send an all-caps message into your group chat, announce it anywhere and everywhere possible.

congrats

Sae's message reads. You frown a little because looking back, you did freak out about this to him. Unpleasant memories flood your mind and your cheeks heat up. Right, it's just a graduation, why were you pissing yourself every time someone mentioned it? You physically cringe at just revisiting all of the instances.

You send him your thanks in the most nonchalant way possible (you ended up with a lame “thx”) but hey, if you truly squint, the communication has gotten better. The bare minimum is being barely met but you don't expect much from the Japan prodigy to begin with.

You get up and stretch a little before letting your body drop on the bed. You loosen your body and close your eyes. You were incredibly happy; it was beyond words.

━━━━━━━━━━━━

After the formal part ends, you get off the stage, meeting with your friends and family. Your parents look at you somewhat proudly and you give them a small smile–a little mocking as you could never forget their nagging and how “with this attitude, you will barely graduate”. It stung but you got over it quickly. The way their heads drop, you can tell that they might feel some regret, too. They point towards the exit and mumble “have fun”. You nod and get back to talking to your classmates, friends, teachers. This is a special day, after all.

“Would you look at that? You getting a diploma?” Isagi approaches you along with Kurona who's holding a small bouquet of various flowers. 

Kurona catches your gaze and you can feel the remark that threatens to leave his mouth but he holds himself back. “We are expecting you to do more for us.” And he hands it to you, all toothy.

You almost grab it. “I knew you guys would never stab me in the back.” The flowers look a little wilted but you don't expect much from a pair of football-obsessed high school freaks. 

“Thanks, you two. Don't worry too much–”

“Where's Y/N!” A voice resounds throughout the gymnasium. It's already teeming with sweaty bodies, loud, and someone has so much time on their hands that–

“Here you are!” 

There's Shidou standing before you, next to Isagi and Kurona. He's holding a box of chocolates with the most devious smile. You raise your eyebrow as you subconsciously grip the tube with your graduation certificate in it. No one dares speak a word. And you notice it isn't just you or your friends. The whole hall ceases all their activities, it becomes deafeningly silent that even a drop of a pin could be heard.

“Continue!” Shidou yells and the rest continues as if he was a person of authority. The look on his face is tell-tale enough. 

“I'm sure they have just never seen that ugly ass hair combo, my friend.” Oliver emerges from behind them and waves at you. You're frozen and rendered speechless. You blink once, twice. Why is everyone here? Everyone but … Sae?

“Don't call me that,” Shidou swats the hand from his shoulder and he fixes his look on you.

Your peripheral gaze locks on the two guys that you surely believed would never stab your back. Explain.

“I only invited Oliver, I don't know what he's doing here.”

“Yeah, my bad, it was me. Figured you'd want this to be more lively.”

You intake a sharp breath. Before you can stop yourself, you blurt out, “Why are you even here. Is this a substitution for Sae?”

The others look at you like you're the seventh wonder of the world. You would do the same in their shoes, let's be real. But for the sake of your dignity, you avoid their piercing gazes as you look around the gym. So spacious! And it fits so many people!

“Actually,” Shidou comes closer as he hands you the chocolates. “Yeah, we are. Sae-chan said he couldn't attend. But he said that he's so proud of you and that he misses–”

A new person enters the discussion as he kicks Shidou in the back of his knees.

“My bad.” Sae mumbles as he regards you with a nod. 

He's in all black, and has a cap that covers his face when he looks down.

“The fuck was that for?!”

“You're seriously not asking that, are you?” Oliver crosses his arms as he tries his best not to erupt in laughter. “Ahh, isn't it just so fun in here?”

“You guys are just loud.” you say. It feels as if it's been years since you last talked, your voice sounding raspy doesn't help it, either.

Oliver not so subtly ignores you as he says, “Sae drove us here. He got here late because he was trying to find a parking spot, isn't it right, Prodigy-chan?”

“I could have said that myself.” Sae deadpans.

You, Isagi and Kurona exchange glances. 

I'm sorry… Sowwy

Isagi puts his hands up in a prayer as if you'd accept his apology this way. You mouth, Buy Me a Congratulatory Meal And Then We're Even-all emphasized–and he has no choice but to reluctantly nod. A smile snakes its way onto your face.

Isagi also catches the way you keep throwing glances Sae's way and drags the rest to the side. Some of your classmates have recognized Oliver and came up to him to talk. 

Now it's just the two of you. 

The bustling and chaos around you does little to help you alleviate your mind. You knew there were a lot of things between you and him unsaid and this place, now, was a godsend opportunity.

“You got the chocolates?” Sae asks out of nowhere and you're almost forced to look at him. 

“Huh?” Huh? WEAK. “I don't know what you're talking about.” As you say this, Shidou comes sprinting towards you, the chocolate box already in shambles. “Sorry,” he says almost unapologetically as he points towards the crowd, enjoying your supposed chocolate.

“I guess not.” He takes the box from your hand and you both notice there's only one piece left. “You take it.” You blurt out.

Sae doesn't say anything as he indeed takes the last piece and pops it into his mouth. 

“Can I take a look at your diploma?” he asks out of the blue and for some reason you comply. You hand the tube to him and watch as he carefully takes the document into his calloused hands. You don't think you could stand there idly, doing nothing, anymore so to plan your escape, you scan the area and the best case scenario would be just… turning around, leaving him behind.

You had manners, though, and this childish game wasn't going to cut it anymore. As you turn to look at him and tell him you will go back to Isagi and Kurona, he grabs your shoulder and leans down. Sae uses the diploma to shield both of your faces as he slightly leans down and kisses you on the lips.

You feel something probing on your lips and your body reacts way faster than your mind and you let him in. His tongue swirls and that one piece of chocolate lands in your mouth.

He slowly pulls away but you latch onto him, not backing down. 

Your façade has been long debunked and you knew Sae was aware. Probably had been for some time now with how confidently he invited himself into your mouth.

You pull away and he looks at you amusingly. “What, want more?”

Your face is burning with crimson and you still have some half-decentness in you left that you cover your mouth with the back of your hand. What the fuck was that.

“Gahhh, that was tiring.” Shidou comes back, arms stretching over his head. 

“No one even knew you.” Oliver deadpans.

“I was literally the talk.”

“You were the guy that Itoshi Sae tossed to.”

“Multiple times, if you will.”

“You know what, nevermind.”

“Oh, you two.” Shidou changes the topic as swiftly as he usually does. “Why are you holding their grad certificate?”

“Was curious.” Sae's answer comes fast and almost calculated. He returns it to you.

“Okay.” Shidou eyes both of you. “The kids are going home 'cause practice, school, so it's just us left.”

Oliver adds, “We should go celebrate.”

“Why are you so red?” Shidou turns to you. “Did somethin' happen?”

“I am fine, you guys go ahead. I will go talk to my teachers before I leave.”

“I will go talk to them, too. Haven't updated them in a while.” Sae says.

Oliver and Shidou exchange fully knowing glances. “Alright, you know where you parked your car. We will wait there.. after we find it.”

Sae nods and the two of them leave with a mischievous glint in their eyes.

“You wanna tell me something?” Sae asks and it takes you a while to realize that he's talking to you.

“Me? I don't think so. Maybe you have something to tell me?” You say, inwardly cringing at how it ended up sounding despite all your nonexistent efforts. 

“Well, I'll go talk to them if you don't mind–”

“Sae,” you exhale. It feels like the more you call out to him, the more free you feel and the more true you're staying to yourself.

He turns to look at you and you hate being scrutinized over. Yet…you gather all your courage and say, unfiltered, “I like you.”

Sae's lips quirk in a small smile. A minute passes. Or maybe a second. You don't know because it feels too long until he responds.

“I know.”

You raise your eyebrows. “Actually–”

Sae chuckles and gets closer and you actively notice you don't mind it. At all. “I like you, too. I have for a while. A long while.”

You look at him and you notice that he's really grown now. He wasn't the boy you once dated and…  almost loved. Though, the personality stayed the same still, but you believe it is a part of the Itoshi appeal.

His hair is longer, his features got sharper and you can only hope that you feeling he has gotten mellower is also right.

“I don't think I ever stopped.”

Your heart starts beating faster. It accelerates with every passing second and you feel like passing out. You also never thought you'd find yourself near him again, let alone like him and be in each other's proximity. Just like before. 

“Aren't you such a romantic?” Your voice comes out meek. But you know that it isn't any sign of weakness.

“Let's go talk to the teachers,” you lay out your hand to him, “I'm sure they missed seeing their favorite sports player.”

He scoffs but takes your hand nonetheless.

That in itself was an answer you both wanted. Neither of you was a fan of words and it manifested itself in this form of a relationship. In the end, words never conveyed as much as actions did.

They truly never did.

a/n: FUCKING FINALLY!!!! i cant say im totally happy with how i managed the series and how it flowed overall (severe burnout from the constant posting in the beginning (sprinkle some life things that contributed to the plot that i call my life) that i had to sit down and breathe). thank you to everyone who stuck around despite everything, im eternally grateful. if you have any questions, send an ask and ill answer!! until then <3!!!

tag list: @kiopanxp @funtuki @silly-ez @asteroskoniiii @keijiqahara @pikibee @tamimemo @kaitfae @biaonww @y-sabell-a @kaiserkisser @winterpein @bloombb @yyoichisgirl @rifran

[marcia-11111]

Somewhere only we know - Sae Itoshi x fem! reader

It's a fluff with some angsty pieces. Reader is a captain of the coeducational team of Real Madrid, the new idea of World's Soccer Association. A mention of reader's sad past. Sae may be a little ooc.

Sae Itoshi is a character who belongs to the authors of the manga and anime "Blue lock".

h/c - hair colour

e/c - eye colour

s/t - skin tone

Please don't translate, plagiarise nor use my works on other social media platforms, etc.

--------------------------------

As harsh, cold, and distant as Sae Itoshi has become since his arrival in Spain, he was still only a human. The wind caused his reddish-brown hair to move. The new idea of the World Soccer Association dismayed him. Coeducational team? What a farce. Playing with women didn’t bother him, but having more people on his contact list was indeed troubling. At that point in time, Sae certainly hadn’t thought he would meet the bane of his existence. As much as Y/N L/N was an infuriating woman with her beautiful h/c hair and s/t skin, he could not have removed the picture of the striker from his head. How dare she have flashed her sparkling e/c eyes at him? Did she not realize how he must have felt next to Y/N? 

A Japanese prodigy. A genius midfielder. A member of Real Madrid's youth team. An asshole. A handsome male who is rude to interviewers. Because of his outstanding soccer career, the older Itoshi earned numerous titles and nicknames. Everything would have been flowing altogether if it weren’t for the new captain of Real Madrid’s coeducational team, Y/N L/N. He remembered their first meeting too well. No matter how hard he tried, he persisted in having forgotten her; he could not have done so. 

That Monday evening after practice. One week ago, when Sae’s teal eyes met Y/N’s e/c one, he kept his distance, never exposing that his distant nature was only a facade. She came up to him. 

“Leave me be. You probably know who I am, so I won’t bother with saying anything more to you.” He said it coldly. His demeanor didn’t discourage her. 

“A kind of peculiar way to introduce yourself to the new captain of Real Madrid, Sae Itoshi. I do not have to announce who I am either.” Y/N chuckled. Of course he knew who she was—Y/N L/N, the ex-captain and ex-striker of the Brazilian pro-team, Jackals. Her former teammates were such prodigies as herself. Even though she was already a star, Sae could not have been less bothered by the woman’s presence until their gazes met for the first time. He felt a bizarre feeling—it wasn’t butterflies, but a sense of familiarity. The midfielder noticed a bandage on her right arm, not having dared to ask what had happened to her. 

“I am not interested in talking with you.” The Japanese prodigy remained completely unfazed, despite a glint of surprise he (luckily) managed to contain. 

“Mhm. As if I wanted to talk with someone who has your attitude,” She replied calmly. “Y/N L/N.  Whether it’s a pleasure or not to see me for you, I do not care. My responsibility as a captain is to inform teammates of upcoming matches and not indulge in personal matters. You are a midfielder, correct?” Y/n added. Sae was flabbergasted. That woman appalled him to no end. Her beauty, her remarks, her personality. She is the new captain!? Good luck to members who cannot handle sarcasm and criticism. 

“... Correct.” Sae answered. His tone of voice was still as cold as the Arctic Ocean. He scanned the h/c’s woman's body, trying not to stare.

“Good. We have a practice match tomorrow. With FC Barcelona. Coeducational team. See you soon.” After having said that, his new captain just walked away. He didn’t want to be bothered by anyone; however, why did he feel the urge to run after her? He stayed in place, completely frozen due to the events of the past few minutes. The practice match against the rival team ended with a score of 4:3 for Real Madrid. Y/N proved herself one more time.

One month later, Sae found himself wandering aimlessly around the shores of Barcelona. Staring at the sea was his favorite pastime. It eased the mind of the young prodigy. The calm waves differed greatly from the people he was forced to be surrounded by. The feeling of the sand under his bare feet, freedom from any kinds of obligations, and hustle of the soccer world... 

What the boy could not have expected was to meet someone as strong and confident as Y/N, crying on the beach. She appeared vulnerable yet powerful, beautiful yet sad. 

“Why do you still haunt my mind? Why did my former team disband? Just why?” She sobbed to herself. They were the only two people on that shore. “Glass-shattered… That much for half a year not being present in the soccer world. Everything slipped through my fingers.” A young female took the sand in her hand and let it fall on the beach. “Just like this sand.”

Sae observed Y/N’s movements. She seemed so weak and strong at the same time. A fragile but poisonous flower. 

“Welcome back home, Y/N. In my hometown, which feels so foreign.” She sighed and sobbed. 

“Are you alright?” The question left the Japanese prodigy’s mouth before he could have ever thought about it. The weather and scenery didn’t match the scene before his eyes. Sae felt a sharp feeling in his chest—was it empathy, care, love, or sympathy? He wasn’t sure. The urge to embrace the cute woman in the midfielder's arms strengthened every second.

“No, I am not.” That answer was enough for him. Fuck it. Let him do what his heart wants for the first time in a while. Even if it was reckless for himself and his own career, Sae Itoshi hugged Y/N. The young male would be damned if he left her there alone without anyone to lean on. It was certain. He would not allow her to feel the same way he did after his arrival in Spain. Young, alone, and inexperienced in life. Some people have physical homes, others have spiritual ones, and some are lucky enough to have both. 

The male’s eyes widened when Y/N snuggled up to him. He stayed calm, but wrapped his muscular arms around the woman’s waist. 

“Do you have anyone to rely on?” He carefully stroked the girl’s back while she sobbed. 

“My parents are constantly not home; friends are abroad. My past is quite ominous, Sae… I had been the captain of the world’s best female prodigies in Rio de Janeiro. Everything ended when one of my teammates cheered. I was forced to disband the team. She shattered a glass trophy on my right arm; this is why it has been bandaged since then,” She revealed. “Barcelona is my hometown, but it feels so foreign.”

“...” Sae didn't answer; he just stroked Y/N’s back in a circular motion. “Shhh…” The girl started to sob again, this time into the older Itoshi’s chest. It didn’t bother him at all, contrary to what he thought earlier. Emotions were only an obstacle that prevented him from becoming the best. Maybe he was wrong. After all, within all his pride and coldness, Sae Itoshi wasn't a stranger to admitting his own mistakes. 

“Sae…” Y/N’s voice took him out of his train of thought. 

“Yes, querida?” The young male didn't notice that he used a nickname, which enhanced their proximity. However, the girl’s attention was somewhere else. 

“Could we dance in the streets of Barcelona? Please, Sae. It has been my dream since I was a young girl.” She whispered her request. Sae’s heart started to beat faster, no matter how hard he tried to collect this organ. 

“Yes…” Sae stood up first, helping the girl stand up. No matter how much he hated to admit it, he was still a caring person deep down. Behind the closed curtains and walls of ice, a warm heart beat. Sae Itoshi, in all his fame, glory, and achievements, existed as a human being, not a god. 

The girl softly smiled at him and jumped slightly. 

“There is a cozy area. Without paparazzi. I liked to go there when I was younger, with all of my troubles. The music always matches the feelings of a person!” Y/N exclaimed. Her e/c eyes examined Sae’s expression. When she checked for any signs of disapproval and found none, her precious smile brightened. The young woman intertwined her fingers with the man’s and showed him the way to the venue. “It’s here!” 

The music played. The rays of the evening sun illuminated the area. Y/N had never seemed more ecstatic than in that moment. Her skin and eyes were shining due to the light. Sae’s heart must have stopped beating. 

“美しい (utsukushii).” He whispered, not spotting Y/N’s curious gaze while she stared at the boy. Little did she know the word Sae said meant ‘beautiful’. 

“Shall we dance?” The older Itoshi didn’t reply but instead began to dance with her. ‘Somewhere only we know’ by Keane was played. Spain indeed felt like an empty, foreign land for him. The feeling of the sea nearing comforted both of them. Even though Sae could remember the streets of Madrid and Barcelona by heart, they have never given him a sense of familiarity. Always a foreigner, no matter where he found himself. And it appeared Y/N felt the same. Both of them didn’t have a place to begin. The world, which was once a cruel and cold place, seemed to have warmed along with their dance. 

Sae wrapped one arm around Y/N’s waist, signaling that he finally let her in. The other hand was intertwined with the girl’s. They kept on dancing in a comfortable place, such as the venue. They didn’t need any words to explain what they felt. The birds sang as the song continued. It wasn’t just a mere intimate moment, but an entanglement of souls. A lonely tear fell down Sae’s cheek. After so long, he found home in a woman. She was perfect. An angel. The light to his darkness, kindness to his mean nature. This was the place he had earned to find the sense of proximity that Sae Itoshi craved. After all that happened to him in Spain, the prodigy found happiness. 

“Y/N… I-” He couldn’t continue his sentence. The world would be cursed if she didn’t feel the same way as he does. Was it the end of everything? Their last dance? Or the beginning of something new? Even the gods themselves wondered. That endearing smile of hers—how much he wished to shield it from the world. Sae didn’t dare break the silence anymore. The romantic lyrics made his heart pound harder as the music reached its climax. Their bodies together felt like poetry. Not a forbidden one. The destined one. Everything fit perfectly, and they moved in sync. And once the music ended, gathering up his whole courage, Sae Itoshi made the first move: he hugged Y/N, embracing her tightly. 

“This has been wonderful... This song… It reminds me of you. Y/N.” He whispered as the tears fell down his cheeks. The young male was joyful when the girl let him embrace her. What he did not expect was the next question. 

“Do you finally feel at home, Sae? Thousands of kilometers away from your motherland.” He nodded, still clinging to Y/N.

“I do feel like I am at home, Y/N. I feel like I finally found peace in your arms. That is what I have always longed for," he confessed. For the first time abroad, the boy felt at home. “Do you mind if we stay like this for a little longer?”

“Certainly not. We can hold onto each other forever.” The girl’s voice made him smile. He kept holding her close to his chest. 

“I’ll be glad to stay like this forever.” He hugged her even tighter. The tears stopped streaming down his cheeks. 

“I have a confession to make.”

“I am all ears.” He didn’t let go of the young woman. 

“Barcelona has been my hometown since I was born. Currently, this city feels so foreign. The unfamiliarity terrified me. I had spent so much time abroad, resulting in my becoming a stranger here. However, today… I found peace with you. I finally feel at home.” Y/N revealed. She didn’t even stutter. Sae’s embrace tightened even more. 

“You know that I feel the exact same way?” A chuckle escaped the midfielder’s mouth. “I think I actually feel at home too, with you.”

“Maybe we are each other's destiny? Who knows? It fills me with joy. To be with someone, I don’t have to spend a lifetime translating my soul.” The girl looked into Sae’s teal eyes. He caressed her cheek. 

“It’s the most wonderful feeling I have ever experienced. Not having to translate my soul to you. Just one look, one thought, one word, and we understand each perfectly. I know I come off as rude, distant, and cold as well. We didn’t get off on the right foot. However, as the time went by, you showed me something more than a pretty girl with monstrous soccer skills—someone I could lean on. A person who became my home abroad.” Sae took a deep breath. “I love you, Y/N. And the world would be damned if my feelings were not reciprocated.”

There it was. She kissed him softly but passionately. The shock faded away quickly, and he returned the favor, tasting her lips for the first time. That day was his dream come true. He didn’t expect to fall in love and become smitten with someone. It didn’t matter now. After all, Sae Itoshi was still a human, even with all his medals and prizes.

[taz-skylar]

looks like sentiment tripped you up after all, hero.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JESS (@saeitoshi​​), MY FELLOW DABIHAWKS FAN AND FELLOW KEYBOARD SMASHER FAJDLKFJA!!! I HOPE YOU’RE DOING WELL, BUD!! I’M SO GLAD I GOT TO KNOW YOU BECAUSE I CAN’T IMAGINE NOT HAVING YOU AND YOUR AMAZINGNESS IN MY LIFE NOW!! YOU DESERVE THE WORLD AND I HOPE YOU GET EVERYTHING YOU EVER WANT, BUD!! 💙💙

[prawnsers]

[krnsluvvie]

love at first, love at second, love at last

ocho: la importancia

SUMMARY: sae had chosen his career and that was shortly followed by his and y/n's separation. three years pass by and amongst all the lurking and stalking each other's socials, sae is suddenly found back in their hometown. old feelings are resurfaced, current ones are questioned and a whole load of future ones are found in a blur.

siete | masterlist | nueve

tag list: @kiopanxp @funtuki@silly-ez @asteroskoniiii @keijiqahara @pikibee

[krnsluvvie]

love at first, love at second, love at last

veinticuatro: entrando en calor

SUMMARY: sae had chosen his career and that was shortly followed by his and y/n's separation. three years pass by and amongst all the lurking and stalking each other's socials, sae is suddenly found back in their hometown. old feelings are resurfaced, current ones are questioned and a whole load of future ones are found in a blur.

veintitres | masterlist | veinticinco

tag list: @kiopanxp @funtuki @silly-ez @asteroskoniiii @keijiqahara @pikibee @tamimemo @kaitfae @biaonww @y-sabell-a @kaiserkisser @winterpein @bloombb @yyoichisgirl

[krnsluvvie]

love at first, love at second, love at last

siete: dime (+ wc: 0,8k)

SUMMARY: sae had chosen his career and that was shortly followed by his and y/n's separation. three years pass by and amongst all the lurking and stalking each other's socials, sae is suddenly found back in their hometown. old feelings are resurfaced, current ones are questioned and a whole load of future ones are found in a blur.

seis | masterlist | ocho

sae inserts the key into the hole, twists the doorknob and the second the door closes, he drops on the floor.

gosh, i'm so fucking stupid.

there was a lot of unpacking to do and a lot of information that he can't yet bring himself to stomach. first it was y/n. deciding between texting them and not at all was a hard, silent battle. to make matters worse, it all happened before his practice. the longing for the past nagged at him and pulled at his heartstrings so much that he couldn't restrain it anymore. the familiarity of their contact on his screen made him cave in and text them right away. 

the warmth that enveloped him subsequently felt like a blanket on a cold winter day and he was so damned for basking in the imagination.

back then, they used to text everyday. his responses were mostly one-worded and y/n didn't seem to mind as much–though they did bring this up to him, thus a long conversation followed about how dry and uninterested he sounded over text. all was made up for when they went out at night to the convenience store, had a cute little date and at last, separated their ways.

something about them brought sae a sense of comfort and safety. y/n was bubbly, understanding and so painfully supportive when it came to his football career. they would try their best to come to his matches, make sure to cheer him on as loud as possible. and even though he did feel second-hand embarrassment at such flamboyant behavior, it made him feel so grateful.

that feeling was new but sae was slowly getting used to it. used to y/n and their warmth.

sae couldn't really let go of it. no, not just yet. it was all he thought of when he was in spain. it was weighing on his mind like crazy and the guilt was eating him up alive, more and more each day.

his dream of becoming the best striker in the world was shattered right before his eyes as he realized just how competitive the other footballers from around the world were. his japanese teammates, and even the back-then teams could not compare.

his mind had to switch to a different mindset. he didn't have to be a striker–though, it took him a long time to process that–he could act as a helping hand to the said striker. 

thus, rigorous training sessions were set in motion and his whole body composition changed. he'd always been strong but he wanted to be stronger and even more so–look like it. 

he had to keep himself occupied at all times. he had to.

the phone in his sweatpants starts vibrating and he sighs.

oliver.

he picks it up, staying silent. 

“prodigy-chan, we're on, so join whenever you're ready.”

sae rolls his eyes. he told him many times not to call him a prodigy but with the way oliver is, sounds like he'd do the total opposite. and of course he did. 

“sure.” and then he hangs up. because there is nothing more to say.

~

“we played too much valorant, why can't we do some open-world games now?”

“i know damn well you mean genshin, shidou.” oliver sighs into the mic.

“is it wrong?”

“this is why no one wants you.”

“i can say the same about you.”

“Scheiße, stop arguing.” kaiser adds as if that was the most natural thing to do.

“where the heck have you been, asshole?” oliver asks.

sae can only force himself to turn off the mute option. “timezone.” and… he's muted again.

“anyway, if you don't want to play, i'm leaving.” shidou announces out of the blue. oliver can only laugh in response. “you'd be doing us a favor, actually!”

sae rubs his temples. 

“i'll go rest.” and then he ends the call, not even bothering to hear their protests.

why is it that today he feels especially tired? practice wasn't even that bad. it never is unless he forces himself to go past his limits and break down. it had felt liberating but then football lost its meaning for an indefinite amount of time. so he never did it again.

sae reaches for his phone on the desk and subconsciously clicks on the twitter icon. 

his mind wanders back to y/n. from what he knows so far, they probably still have him blocked on every social media platform as all that stalking and lurking stopped ever since he found about it. sae's official account, however, can't be private and that's why he minimizes his ranting. hell, he doesn't even do it on his private account. maybe this is a sign that he should stop fucking bottling his emotions up.

his eyes lazily run over the posts, uninterested and bored. they are slowly closing. but then… then—

a/n: posting this soon so i can get it out of my system, i want to thank everyone who's been liking the posts, the story, and commenting so far! <3

(fyi: the title of the chapter says dime [dih-meh] as in 'tell me', not dime [daim] as in the ten-cent coin. :p)

tag list: @kiopanxp @funtuki@silly-ez @asteroskoniiii @keijiqahara