#self neutrality

[cult-of-the-eye]

I think for me, the best way to start thinking of myself as a Kinda Ok Dude 👍 rather than Worthless Piece of Shit 👎 is to imagine myself as a character...oh man...the headcanons people would have about me

[kid-a-their-blog]

🌹🌻🧡 I am allowed to gain weight, it does not make me any less attractive. I am attractive no matter what my body looks like🧡🌻🌹

[rainbowhyperfixation]

Sometimes self love isn’t possible and self-neutrality is your goal. It’s good to try to find things that make you feel good and connected if you can💕

[aromerrowace]

Hating yourself just gets boring after a while. Like you hang onto those familiar thought processes, those song lyrics about how much you suck and you’re a failure, and you put yourself down before anyone else can do it, and then one day, you wonder, “why the hell am I doing this?” Because at first it’s kind of fun. It gives you a distinct personality trait and an easy set of facts about yourself and easy thought processes. “I’m a failure. I suck. I’m ugly. Everyone hates me. I’m so annoying. I’m the worst.” And then eventually it just gets stale. The songs aren’t fresh and real anymore. It’s not relatable or funny. The new friends you’ve made seem uncomfortable with it. Who are you performing this for? What benefits do you get from it? So instead you’re like “actually I’m cool now. I’m hot and rad and fun and super smart. I’m the best haha. Yeah.” And at first it’s a joke until one day several years later, you look in the mirror and you’re like “wow I AM hot” and you do or say something clever and someone tells you it was smart and you’re like “wait that WAS smart” and people like you and you don’t think it’s obligational anymore

Or maybe that’s just how it was for me

[snaffirmations]

[ID: A photo of a small, pale snail on top of a twig with acorns. The snail is reaching up to a bent over purple flower. There is white text above, to the left of, and below the snail and flower that reads “Eating is a basic necessity” “Every human deserves to eat” “You are human” “You deserve to eat”. End ID]

There is not a thing on the planet that will ever influence how much you deserve to eat; you inherently deserve to eat simply because you are a human being who exists and food is a basic human necessity. saying you don’t deserve to eat is like saying you don’t deserve to go to the bathroom

you deserve food, water, shelter, and love because they are basic human necessities and every human inherently deserves them

Original image source _@/

[traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors]

Seeking advice/opinions. Is it possible to learn to like/love yourself after 20 years of not? I’m 26 and I remember learning to feel inferior starting at the age of 6, so that’s literally 20 years. Basically it’s due to a combination of trauma (abuse and bullying) and just generally the way I grew up. I have ADHD and likely a learning disability and that combined with the trauma I went through just really drilled into me that I was less. Is it even possible to undo 20 years of conditioning?

Hi anon,

It is definitely possible, but in a lot of cases, not easy. If you can't see the good in yourself, self love can be really hard.

For me, what really helped is the concept of being neutral about myself as a stepping stone.

Here is an article about it.

Basically, jumping to self-love is too difficult for a lot of people and it leads to them being discouraged and giving up. Neutrality is sometimes a more feasible step for people. It isn't positive nor negative but usually objective and sticks to facts.

An example may be:

"Sometimes I fail, and sometimes I succeed." This could be an affirmation if your thought process is normally "I fail at everything I do" or "I'm a failure."

You don't have to immediately accept yourself, but you can tell yourself you are working on accepting yourself.

This doesn't work for everyone, but just some thoughts I wanted to share if self-love feels impossible right now. That's really valid, and you aren't alone in that.

It is possible to get there, and you deserve to get there.

April

[fictional-catastrophe]

This has been spinning in my mind for a while now. Fellow loveless aros, what are your thoughts and feelings about the constant appeal to love yourself and practice Self-Love? Maybe I am speaking from a place of still recovering from trauma but honestly I very much prefer the concept of Self-Neutrality. My lovelessness does not exclude myself.

[princetrashrat]

If you can’t love yourself yet...

this^^