The afterlife
Knowledge is power. But not knowing what comes after death is the most agonizing thing about suicide.
Lately, I've been afraid that the journey doesn't end in a quick painless death. I'm afraid that I'll be weighed down with chains and become a ghost, forced to relive old memories over and over again for all eternity for having the audacity to take control over my fate.
If there is any sort of mercy, I would get to write my life's story after death. I elect to become a fairy, high on happiness, spreading cheer and joy.
When the depressed ones sleep, off I'll trot into their blackened hopeless lives and suck out their depression.
With a swish of my wand, they'll be filled with joy and hope
The will to live
The ability to love themselves...
For you see, when you despise yoursel, a voice inside you constantly tells you that you are not good enough, you hear it echo around you. When people tell you that you've been excellent, the voice comes along and sharply tells your dampened spirits to stay dampened. You also hear the voice tell you that you are being given praise out of pity.
No compliment that ever came your way was ever real.
And so, if and when I become a fairy in the afterlife, I'm going to visit all the downtrodden hopeless ones and suck out that voice.
And then, I'm going to fly away to nearest volcano with the speed of light and hurl down the blackened emotions into the smoldering pit of fury and rage.
And when they burn, my fairylight will twinkle with pride.
In the afterlife, I'm going to be a fairy godmother for all the Cinderellas who are burnt and stung by the embers that are fuelled from the inside.
