#signed edison

[asvrai]

You okay there, Coomer? Are you still hungry or something? -✨

Nanobots, I’m full.

[Coomer stands right in the path of the core. Luckily, it stops just in front of him. Unluckily, it starts to wield its instruments in a more threatening fashion. It has knives now. And a culinary blow torch. Its eye narrows.]

An entry called 'how to kill someone with your bare hands'.

Asphyxia is a condition of severe lack of oxygen supplied to the body. In the absence of remedial action it will very rapidly lead to unconsciousness and death. Asphyxia is the same as suffocation and anoxia. Asphyxiation is the act of causing asphyxia, usually by suffocation.

Asphyxia in humans is a medical emergency.

...

[The various implements retract into the core. There is a loud CLUNK as it detaches from the management rail, dropping into Coomer’s arms. It seems it’s been pacified, though it continues to repeat its strange cake recipe in a quiet, monotone voice. Its eye rolls around lazily.]

ᵀʷᵒ ᶜᵘᵖˢ ʳʰᵘᵇᵃʳᵇ, ˢˡᶦᶜᵉᵈ. ᵀʷᵒ ˢˡᵃˢʰ ᵗʰʳᵉᵉ ᶜᵘᵖˢ ᵍʳᵃⁿᵘˡᵃᵗᵉᵈ ʳʰᵘᵇᵃʳᵇ. ᴼⁿᵉ ᵗᵃᵇˡᵉˢᵖᵒᵒⁿ ᵃˡˡ⁻ᵖᵘʳᵖᵒˢᵉ ʳʰᵘᵇᵃʳᵇ...

Bubnick, I’ve made a friend!

[Bubnick is currently making sure all of the ovens and stoves are turned off, but he gives a distracted thumbs up.]

[asvrai]

Visit Original Link

FACT: You are rude.

[asvrai]

Mr. Edison, can we come in please? ~ Pockets

“Fine, so long as you don’t touch anything. Unless you want to vaporize the potatoes, or something, I don’t know what B installed on you.” The door to the kitchen creaks open, inviting you in. 

As you enter, the first thing you notice is the pile of crates of potatoes. The second thing you notice is the other pile of potatoes. When you finally manage to see beyond the potatoes, you notice what Your database deems a pretty typical commercial kitchen. It seems somewhat in disarray, but no more than you would expect after a lunch rush. 

Equipped with a spray bottle and cloth, a young man in a chef’s outfit is stepping over the potatoes, doing his best to clean up. You pull up information on him using Your facial recognition and database...

[asvrai]

Egg?

Sounds kind of like one, but...

[Bubnick picks up the core, tilting it this way and that. The logic core shifts in his hands, moving its eye and various chassis pieces to one side to let Bubnick reach into the gearwork in its side.]

[Bubnick pulls out a... potato?]

Po-ta-to!

SEEING ALL THE POTATOES IN THE KITCHEN MUST’VE TRIGGERED... SOME REMAINS OF A MEMORY. ENOUGH TO MAKE HIM WANT TO KEEP ONE AROUND.

[asvrai]

NO POTATOES??? After that load they ordered? Ha, you’d have thought they’d dump some... or something

[The logic core freezes, staring into the middle distance. He strings together one word from various sound bytes in his pre-programmed recipe.]

Po-ta-to?

[They pause, rocking back and forth as much as they are capable. Something is... rattling?]

[asvrai]

Ayy Ed! Can you tell us about your co-workers? You've gotta have some fun stories about them -✨

Edison shrugs. A potato topples off a nearby stack and he sighs, wandering over to pick it up. “I don’t really interact with anyone. I stay back here, cooking, and yes, I see nearly everyone every day, but the only people I’ve really talked to are Rick and B.” He pauses, thinking. “I’d say I talk to Alan too, but I keep this place clean on my own so I never really need him up here.”

[asvrai]

You should fill Rick's locker with potatoes. - 🐟

“You!” Edison jabs the scrub brush in the direction of the screen display, showing a mix of your messages and the final lunch orders of the day. “You have the right idea.”

[asvrai]

Mr. Edison, you've seen Mr. Alan? Where is he? ~ Pockets, carving his little heart out with this potato

“Alan? He’s probably...” Edison checks a clock hanging above the door to the cafeteria. “He’s on break now, actually. You’ll probably find him hanging out up near the surface, near the loading dock.”