When you had decided to become a trainee under the Starship label you had hardly expected that it would have been as difficult as it was. Sure, you had heard stories from other people, but you only began to understand the immense difficulty when you lived it out yourself. You knew there would be many sleepless nights, but what past trainees didn’t include was that when those sleepless nights happened it also included aching muscles remained sore days after. You knew that money would be tight, but no one mentioned that some days you would have to go without eating when everything in your body pleaded with you to. Being a trainee was the hardest thing you had ever done, and now it was finally coming to an end. Every minute of intense practice, every day spent practicing vocals, every second away from your family and friends had all been to help you reach this moment. You were finally debuting.
It was only natural to think back to when you first became a trainee. Despite all the times that were not so fun there were also times that you were glad you experienced. And for some reason many of those memories included a certain senior that had always found time to practice with you. Soyou had claimed she was this supportive with all the trainees, but you still liked to think you were special, because every happy memory you had she was almost always in the picture. You thought back to the many times Soyou had helped you with your vocals, the times she had stayed late in practice rooms with you, the night completely dark and silent except for the sound of each of your voices booming off the walls. You remember her always buying you lunches or sometimes packing you little bento boxes and even though she persistently told you it was no big deal you could tell that she had spent a lot of time making the food. She would make you laugh so hard water came out of your nose, help you so often that you dance coach became convinced you knew the choreography in advance, and make you smile just when you thought about her. And now she was going to be there to watch you debut, and you were absolutely fucking nervous.
This moment had been the moment your entire existence had been leading up to, maybe that wasn’t fully true, but you felt content with over exaggerating in the moment. You had practiced so hard over the past months, trying your best to nail every ounce of your performance, and that’s why it was so scary. So many people were relying on you, whether it be your company, your parents, your friends, Soyou. You didn’t want to let any of them down. You twirled your water bottle around in your hand, doing your best, but failing not to fidget backstage. In T minus 30 minutes you were going to debut, and it all felt so foreign.
That was when you felt a delicate hand on your shoulder. It caused you to jump slightly due to the immense focus you had put into your thoughts. At first, you thought it would be a manager or one of the stage crew members, but it was a sweet and blissful surprise when you turned and saw Soyou. She looked amazing, which made your heart beat a little faster, but you didn’t dwell too much on that. “How are you doing?” She asked, one eyebrow raised, she could read you like a book.
You didn’t know what to say, so you didn’t say anything at all. How could you possibly explain how you were feeling? You felt as if you were feeling every emotion all at once, but that couldn’t be possible, could it? She sat down next to you and slung her arm around you, pulling you onto her shoulder. “I don’t even know why I asked? It’s okay, I’m going to say all the things I wish someone had said to me when I debuted.”
Now you turned to her and raised your eyebrow. “I honestly don’t think anything can calm me down right now Soyou.”
“I will take that challenge.” She puffed out her chest like she was a game protagonist and spoke in an announcer like voice. She reached out for your hand and took it in your own, which made your nerves melt into a puppy dog affection. She may be winning, but only a little.
“Let me start out my big and grand speech with this, there is absolutely no doubt in my mind that you are going to nail this. You have worked so, so hard (Y/N) and your kind of, sort of amazing so you also have that going for you. The first thing I noticed when I first saw you was how much talent you had, and quite frankly I’m more worried about if everyone waiting for you is actually ready.”
She watched you through her big black eyes as they spoke, and you comfortably melted into them when you felt the sincerity of her words. She continued her speech for what felt like hours, but not hours that felt like a lecture, it felt more like a story. Or perhaps she was a doctor this whole time and successfully when down the checklist and cleared all the symptoms and bad emotions you were feeling like it was nothing, like it was just her job to be there for you. And when she finished she reached into her purse and pulled out a plastic black box. A small bento box, just like she would so often make for you. “You’re probably too nervous to eat, but when you’re amazing everyone I brought you dinner.”
“Soyou I love you so much.” You whispered in a quiet voice that still kept an excited tone. Maybe you did love her.
“It’s no big deal, I do this for everyone.”
A smirk shot across your face the minute you heard those familiar words. “I don’t think you do. I think you just love me.”
“Maybe I do.” She said back with a big smile lighting up her face.
