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The rambling cuts off abruptly, stony silence ringing from the other end of the line, but Jason knows Bruce is listening. Listening and running through several calculations on how someone— and who— could have gotten this number, while simultaneously tracking the call signal.
This is gonna be fucking gold.
Time to sell it.
“Dad,” he sobs, pitching his voice until it breaks, teeth chattering exaggeratedly, “Dad, please, I’m scared, I-“ Jason cuts himself off with a scream and another series of sobs, “Please, I can’t— it’s locked! Please, no, Dad, it’s locked—“
OR
Jason's need for drama successfully derails his plans for vengeance “Red Hood“ style
Blame @festive for letting the idea become a thing
Not many couples can say they've been together for 10 years, and if they have it seems like that's the time they get resentful or bothered by their spouses.
You won't lie you and taiju have had ups and downs but none to warrant hating the sight of one another. What with taiju opening another restaurant, hiring new staff ,while still managing and maintaining the original location you two have maybe a day or two with yourselves, but even then your two children keep you on your toes and what with another on the way taiiju understands while on his days off you mostly sleep.
"Why not do something spontaneous" taiju raised an eyebrow at the suggestion "I mean surprise her one night, get off of work early, bring some flowers, ask your in laws to watch the kids you know so it's just the two of you lift up your arms please" taiju did as mitsuya instructed even after their fight back when they were teens they reconnected when taiju was recommended to mistuya services when he needed a tuxedo for his wedding. "As much as I appreciate the advice granted you're single, she's going away to her parents for her father's birthday and what with the new location opening soon I won't be going" the silver haired male shook his head "single or not which by the way fuck you I still know a little bit of spontaneity is always good" side eyeing the blue hair male while writing down his measurements "and if it were me I'd actually show up surprising them even if they are at their parents".
That statement alone is what got taiju in this predicament and if he could turn back time he wouldn't let mitsuyas words sway him.
Sure enough taiju got off work, drove to your parents, and was now currently throwing pebbles at your window which was one the second story. You woke up to the sound of slight taps every few minutes throwing on a your sleeping robe your squinted eyes to see your husband. "What are you doing here" you whispered loud so taiju could hear "I wanted to surprise you look I know we have been busy but I miss just spending time together" you smiled at his words "that's alll very nice but my parents are already asleep this couldn't wait until tomorrow?" He shook his head "according to a silver haired know it all a little spontaneity is good plus I can climb up it's not like i haven't done it before" you shrugged remembering all those times you'd sneak him in and out of your house when you two were teens.
As he made his way up and into your window it had slightly lowered making difficult for taiju to go through.
"Hun I can't move" he was trying to push himself but he was stuck "hold on I think the window is jammed" you tried to lift the but the window wasn't budging "I can't move hold on here grab my arms" you pulled as much as you while he tried to wiggle his way but still no use "what the fuck!". You tried to hold in your laughter, but it was getting harder and harder by the minute each time he moved around he'd just get more and more stuck "stop laughing and help me, go grab something that'll let me slip in" you nodded heading towards your connecting bathroom to get some lotion "what about this?" Taiju nodded and you got to work on lotioning his sides.
Bad part is your neighbor across the street could only see a man trying to sneak his way into your bedroom, not knowing that it's your husband and he's being romantic the worried neighbor dialed 911.
As you tried to pull taiju more bit by bit he was gradually moving in but only by an inch. It wasn't until you saw flashing lights and heard sirens did you know this were about to get more embarrassing.
"Sir we have the place surrounded step out of the window, climb down and put your hands behind your head" panic starting rushing through and taijus veins "push me out push me out" you started using all your strength to get your husband out the window. "SIR! this is your final warning get out of the window" your father and mother ran outside wondering why the police were in their yard "what the hell is going on do you know what time it is!!" One of the officers were trying to move your parents further away "sir, ma'am please stand over here we got a call that a strange man was trying to climb through your window" confused your parents turned to be met with the sight of their son in law stuck in your window "that's our son in law!!! That's not a burglar!" "Are you sure about that?" You dad huffed "of course I'm sure that's his car right there" they pointed to the black Porsche parked in front of their house. You came running out in a panic your arms up showing you were ok "please stop! he's my husband" the two officers nodded to one another "sir! Don't move were gonna get the fire department to come get you out".
Red in the face all taiju could do was give a thumbs up.
Taiju and you leave it as a inside joke between the two of you never sharing what happened with anyone who wasn't there to witness his not so romantic moment.
That is until hakkai messaged him a link to a tiktok of a cellphone camera POV of the whole incident with the words across the video saying "when you try to be romantic but you fail" they even included some stills of taiju being cut out of the window and him looking disheveled thanking the firemen.
Your sleepover idea is AMAZING! Such a great and fun idea ❤ Would it be possible to request 82: I dont get paid enough for this shit! With Max Phillips or Pero Tovar 😊❤ Thank you 😊 💓
A/N: Thank you for this request! I have never written for Tovar before, and I think he’s a criminally underrated character. I hope I do him justice. Let’s try it, because quite honestly i don’t even know what this is.
--
“A Job Less Ordinary” (Pero Tovar x Reader)
Pero Tovar’s life was just a comedy of errors. Or, at least, he thought so. But then again, he had always thought the worst.
Then again, he knew if you were by his side now to hear him grouse, you would just smile and roll your eyes playfully at him.
“Always so grumpy,” you would chide. “Maybe you should have chosen a less-complicated profession?”
It was true-- mercenary work was a complicated profession. Even the simplest of smash-and-grab jobs always had a way of turning into more. Honestly, it pissed him off. If his fiery temper didn’t already abut a short fuse, this job would just be the little push he needs to send him over the edge.
He hears your voice again.
“So dramatic, Pero,” you would sigh prettily, dreamily, playing with his fingers as they intertwine with yours.
Pero loved that about you-- you would never hesitate to help ground him when he was in a mood. If anyone else tried, he thinks he’d kill them. His fiery nature often got the better of him, but you’d never seemed to mind. Especially if said fiery temper benefitted you. Specifically, if it benefitted you for hours at a time.
Yet, here Pero was, sitting around a campfire with these faceless idiots who couldn’t keep quiet long enough to hear whether something was sneaking up on them in the dark, which, he thinks, is sort of important if you’re going to survive as a sellsword.
This job was just getting worse and worse all the time. If this merry band of accompanying idiots wasn’t bad enough, he’d been hired to escort a kidnapped prince back to his kingdom, by flash of steel and under pain of death, if necessary. The king’s spoiled son had been taken by the less-than-savory lords of a neighboring kingdom. It seems he had a bit of a gambling problem and stopped repaying his debts.
The king had brought in mercenaries from around the Spanish main to recover his erstwhile heir.
Honestly, Pero thought, I hope they take the brat’s kneecaps. T’would serve him right.
He had barely slept in a few days, the harsh summer heat, even overnight, pressing his leathers and armour into his skin rather uncomfortably, and his group had already been attacked twice. Twice! Once by a merry little bandit of pickpockets he’d been quick to chase away, and once by the lords’ men, hoping to deter the king’s sellswords from recouping their prize.
You’d think a king would dispense better coin if he really cared about his son. But no. Pero had taken the job for far less than he probably should have. Especially if he had known what a pain in the ass this whole thing would be.
But still, though he harbored no desire to return there, he had survived the Tao Tei of the far East, he could survive this idiot boy.
You’d seemed to think so, pressing a warm kiss to the corner of his mouth and wishing him a speedy return, whispering in his ear the promises of riches he was far more interested in upon his return.
The morning came, and Pero and the others trudged on, reaching the manor where the lords were keeping the king’s son. Of course it was heavily guarded, Pero sighed. Of course.
As the idiots around him charged in with no though to strategy, Pero rolled his eyes before joining the fray, swinging his longsword with both hands. He was doing fine, up until a particularly pesky faceless guard swinging a mace nearly clipped him in the arm with said winding weapon.
Pero snarled at him after being knocked off his feet by said faceless guard. Blocking a blow from the ground with his sword, Pero grunted, heaved the man away from him before righting himself upon his own two feet. He’d had enough!
“I don’t get paid enough for this shit,” Pero grunted, swinging his sword cleanly through a gap in the man’s armor, felling him swiftly.
He stormed the manor, grabbing the spoiled prince by the arm with a, “Come, boy. Your king-father awaits.”
And with their group significantly smaller than the group they’d begun with, they commenced their return journey home, the princeling riding atop the back of a neighboring sellsword’s horse, whining loudly about the accommodations.
Another night, another camp and fire. This time, with a loudmouth prince as his company. It would be so much more pleasant if he could just lose himself in his thoughts of you, as he sharpened his axe before the fire. But the boy’s voice was an obnoxious trill hammering a headache behind his eyes.
“Say, how’d you get that scar anyhow, sellsword?” The prince asked, gesturing at his eye to Pero.
Pero grunts in response. “Got it from a warrior king,” he huffed. “I murdered his heir who would not cease his yammering,” Pero uttered harshly. He looked up from his axe to fix a deep glare from his dark eyes into the boy’s.
“What, really?” The prince asked.
Could this boy be any denser? Pero thought. But now he was beginning to enjoy chiding this idiot.
“Churlish, Pero,” you would admonish him. “I do so adore when you are sweeter,” you’d croon, batting your eyelashes at him.
But you weren’t here. And what you did not know, would not harm you.
“Of course not, idiot boy,” Pero snarled. “I got it from a Queen. Your mother, in fact. She should really watch where she wields her taloned grip in the throes of passion,” he laid on his accent extra thick with his last few words.
The prince jumped to his feet, angry now that Pero had dared insinuate he’d fucked his mother.
“How dare you, mercenary!” He shouted. “I- I could have you killed, you know!”
“By whom, boy?” Pero drawled, getting up and gripping the hilt of his sword at his side. “Your king-father? Who do you think is paying me now? Hmm? Sit down and eat your food in silence before I contemplate regicide as applies to a certain prince before mine eyes any further.”
The prince sighed in defeat, before sitting again. Pero barked a laugh at the boy before following suit from across the flames, resuming his sharpening. His thoughts turning to you again.
I don’t get paid enough for this shit, Pero thought again.
The days passed and Pero had effectively delivered his whinging, spoiled quarry into the hands of a grateful, but taciturn, king. Collecting his measly winnings, Pero turned on his heel and left the king’s great hall, eager to return to your arms.
You were awaiting Pero at the doorstep of your small home, long dress blowing in the breeze. You ran to greet him, flinging your arms around his neck and peppering his face with soft kisses. Pero grunted at the impact of your body leaping onto his, but quickly wound his arms around to catch you, hands going instantly to cup your bum through your full skirt and lifting you into a spin.
You giggled as Pero spun you around once, twice, three times before putting you back on your swaying feet, and leaning down to kiss you deeply.
“I am pleased to see you have returned to me in one piece, fair, brave wayfarer,” you gasped through your breathlessness. “I hope your rewards were plentiful to compensate you for such peril.”
Pero growled teasingly at you before scooping you up again and carrying you across the threshold, dropping you onto the bed in the corner of your cozy little room where an evening of passion was sure to await.
He leans over you and cups the sides of your face with his large hands, tracing your lips with this thumbs. There is a swirling danger behind your eyes, and Pero aims to play on it. Until all of your secrets are uncovered, even if it takes all night. What a task.
I have this headcanon that michael doesn't like stevie nicks because jeffrey keeps blasting edge of seventeen in their room at 3am and honestly I cant stop giggling
AH HAH!!! LOVE THIS, ESPECIALLY CAUSE I LOVE STEVIE!
Michael HATES Stevie Nicks. He is declared the next Supreme and his celebration was listening to the White Witch warble on? What the hell?! Screw Gypsy and especially SCREW SEVENTEEN!
Jeffrey’s become obsessed. He moved into Michael’s room a week after they started at Hawthorne and whenever Michael isn’t there he can hear Stevie blaring from the walls. He’s actually avoiding his own damn room.
Finally he slams the door open, wrenches Jeffrey’s iPhone from the speaker system and throws it against the wall. ‘Fucking no!’ He shouts, ‘I can’t take anymore of it.’
Jeffrey frowns at him, waiting till Michael has calmed down. ‘You done, drama queen?’
Michael huffs, sinking onto their bed. Jeffrey smirks, biding his time. Michael tucks himself into bed and Jeffrey sneaks his way over a little later. He places the earbuds in Michael’s ears and then cranks up the volume.
“IF I LIVE TO SEE THE SEVEN WONDERS”
Michael jumps up with a scream that has Jeffrey wheezing. He shoves Jeffrey across the room with his magic, ‘I HATE YOU!’
‘Lighten up, baby brother.’ Jeffrey grins, dancing round the room and giving Michael chase round the room, ‘You’d better get used to her Mikey, now you’re the next Supreme you’re gonna see her a lot more often!’
me after thinking this was gonna be some cute little anime about funny OP guy and clumsy fairy goddess trying to guide him like a funny duo on worldly travels: