#source: shrek

[dame-trina]

When you see his eyes

Loki: Just take one look at me, what am I?

You: Uuuuhhh... *cranes entire body until your body hits the ground* ...Really tall?

Loki: No! Im the accursed prince! You know, “grab your torch and pitchforks”! Doesn't that bother you?

You: *shakes head with a smile* Nope!

Loki: *tilts head* Really?...

You: *nods* Really really!

Loki: *pleasantly surprised* Oh.

[fire-breathing-pain-in-the-neck]

Shrek the Musical Broadway merch is so painfully undocumented, so it’s difficult as a collector when stuff like this comes up:

And I just have to believe it’s real.

[incorrect-maraudersaandco-quotes]

Remus: Just take one look at me, what am I? Sirius: Uuuuhhh... Really tall? Remus: No! I'm the werewolf! You know, “grab your torch and silver”! Doesn't that bother you? Sirius: Nope! Remus: Really? Sirius: Really really! Remus: Oh.

[superiorsturgeon]

Knight!Jaune/Ogre!Nora: *getting kicked out of a town between missions*

Town Mayor: …and don’t ever come back here with that beast!

Ogre!Nora: Jeez! Fine! We’re going already!

Knight!Jaune: I don’t get it, Nora. Why didn’t you do the usual “Ogre” thing?

Knight!Jaune: …you know, throttle him, lay siege to his marches, grind his bones to make your bread, you know, the whole Ogre deal?

Ogre!Nora: Oh! And you know what? Maybe I’ll decapitate an entire village, get a knife, cut open their spleens and drink their fluids!

Ogre!Nora: …does THAT sound good to you? 🙄

Knight!Jaune: …uh…not really, no…🤢

[incorrectstrangemagic]

Dawn, to Bog: We’ll stick together like that velcro stuff. I’m the fuzzy side. You’ll be the spiky.

(source: Shrek the Musical)

[randomanimeandmangablog]

Jamil: We're not friends! I think you're spoiled and oblivious!

Kalim:... Wow! Only a true friend would be that cruelly honest!

[incorrectteyvatism]

"Some of you may die, but that's a sacrifice I'm willing to make."

—Sandrone, probably

[sides-of-quotes]

Remus: Wanna fuck? Janus: You could be a bit more magical in how you've asked that. Would you like to try again? Remus: ...Alakazam, let me slam? Janus: Oh, of COURSE! Remus: Really?! Janus: No.