#strong affections

[sike-n]

when jane austen said there is nothing I would not do for those who are really my friends. i have no notion of loving people by halves; it is not my nature. my attachments are always excessively strong me and my big ole kind heart that has been abused many times felt that to its core

[uccelletto-di-kokuyo]

Hello, you seem very knowledgeable and well heard in the fandom, so I wanted to ask you for your opinion of ‘strong affections’ for fictional characters? Like do you think it’s unhealthy to a certain point? I guess the main reason why I’m asking this is because me and my friend recently had a fight because I sort of criticized Hibari Kyouya and she literally cut me off from KHR because of it.

Ok.  I have a friend who was like this with Gokudera.  And….if you can’t tell I would marry Mukuro in a heartbeat.  The problem is too, we share strong characteristics with these characters.

She would always criticize Mukuro’s cynicism and blunt attitude (let’s face it…if he hates you, you know he hates you) and general loner style.  Some of the same things I have.  I would accidentally take it personally sometimes.

My friends shared Gokudera’s hot-headedness and crazy obsessiveness among other things.  She would sometimes take it personally.

On several occasions we got into pretty bad  fights, but we had to learn how to work it out.  I learned to appreciate Gokudera’s good traits that she also shared (loyalty  and fierce knowledge) and she learned to appreciate Mukuro’s good points I shared (also loyalty and discreetness). 

It takes a lot of work to be honest.  It will take time.  Both sides will have to make an effort.  Perhaps start by asking what it is specifically that upset them.  It may be something small such as wording or possibly it might be something you have to avoid in the future.  I have some friends with whom I just can’t bring up certain characters or certain criticisms (sometimes because we can’t agree or it’s something they’ve heard a hundred times). 

There are definitely times it can be unhealthy.  Anything can be if it gets to the point that it impedes normal functioning.  For the most part I would not consider strong affections bad though.  I wish I could help more, but these things are difficult. 

[vivabuslovesquotes]

Home is a place not only strong affections, but of entire unreserve; it is life's undress rehearsal, it's backroom, its dressing-room.

Harriet Beecher-Stowe