i am a broken person. banter and little jabs can really shake me out of acting cool. how do i grow a thicker skin?
Learning to not react to triggers takes practice. It's like a muscle you have to exercise to become better.
• 1st of all, stop identifying with being the victim. You are not a broken person. You are fully capable of standing firmly in your power. Change your perspective from being weak and gullible to being strong and powerful.
• Take tips from stoicism and learn how to master your emotional reactions. Even when you're hurt, fake your strength. Think before speaking or reacting. Keep a poised face, firm voice and relaxed attitude.
• Learn to be quick witted and respond with sarcasm or humor. If they're nasty to you, give it right back to them but with class. (Nice Nasty). Show them that they're not to be taken seriously and that they cannot move you. Also if it’s a harmless joke, learn to laugh at yourself and not get offended.
• Read books about confidence building. Personally, I favor the book The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz, and his tip to ‘Take Nothing Perosnally' which states that "Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won't be the victim of needless suffering.”
• Work with Goddesses and Feminine Archetypes you're drawn to, to strengthen your confidence. (Connect to the Powerful Goddess Sekhmet or the Lilith Archetype).
• Learn to stand alone, be self contained and confident. Don't be that person needy for others' approval because then you'll become vulnerable and enslaved to their perceptions of you.
