Do you ever think John Winchester was jealous of Dean in a way he could never admit?
He’s the one who taught the boys that “family” is all they have, the one who conditioned Dean to make Sam his entire world as his protector, caretaker, stand-in parent. But in doing so, John built a bond that even he wasn’t part of anymore.
Imagine the way that must’ve felt on hunts. Something goes wrong, Sam’s in danger, and for one gut-wrenching second John thinks he’s too late. He’s already halfway to reaching for his son only to realize Dean’s already there. Dean’s already holding him, already the one Sam clings to, seeking comfort.
And that’s not even Dean’s fault. It’s John’s own making. He created this dependency, but now he’s on the outside of it. Sam’s instinct isn’t to go to his father for safety, it’s to go to his brother. And somewhere deep down, that must’ve burned.
Because John didn’t just lose Mary. In a way, he lost the right to be “home” for his sons too.
EPISODE 6.15 "The French Mistake" IS SO VERY DESTIEL CODED
LIKE
it's actually so revealing that Jensen and Jared are staying in-character despite how surreal everything is? this is Dean and Sam in our world, and from the get-go it's pretty obvious that they are confused beyond words. like, Dean's "oh crap, I'm a painted whore" is just?? iconic?? authentic Dean Winchester moment!??? LOOK AT HIS FACE, BABYGIRL IS SO CONFUSED
and this is relevant to my point bECAUSE it's irrefutable proof that this is 100% Dean and Sam from the show, that they are themselves.
sooooooo
can we please talk about Dean eye-fucking Castiel into oblivion (as you do!!) until Misha stops acting the part, and right the hell away Dean figures out that it's not Cas and is just. no longer interested!?? he's like, alright i'm done with whoever this is!??
his face just falls
and he doesn't even look at Misha as he leaves, just like when he met Jimmy Novak and his homoerotic vibe simply vanished - because that's not his autistic soulmate, it's just Some Dude??
mind you, it's quite interesting to notice that Sam doesn't see what Dean means, because "dude, look at him". which is shorthand for, wdym Dean like he's wearing the trenchcoat with the blue tie, he looks like he doesn't know how to spell the word "hairbrush", he's eye-fucked you right in front of my face as he does.
BUT DEAN!! dean is just like, fuck no that ain't cas
not MY cas anyway!!
the destiel of it all, the dESTIEL IS JUST EXQUISITE
also "Hola, Mishamigos" as he tweets with his tie loose has to be peak Misha Collins energy like. that man was being paid to be unhinged onscreen. what a day it must've been for him
The thing about being 20 years late to any fandom is that there's no original posts left to make. But I want to give my thoughts on the wincest implications of the woman in white anyway.
Starting with Sam being on the phone to Dean when he was targeted by the woman in white, who only targets unfaithful men, and directly paralleling the guy we see get attacked earlier whilst on the phone with his girlfriend.
Given the whole plot of this episode is behind Sam's girlfriends back, really sends this point home. Obviously, we know on a surface level that Sam is lying about what he's doing and why he left so Jess doesn't find out the truth of his childhood and who he is- a hunter.
But when you look deeper, it's quite easy to see this underlying idea of Sam keeping Dean and his relationship with him a secret. I mean, even from the start of the episode we are shown a picture of John and Mary, nothing of Dean. There's no sign or clear memory of Dean in the whole apartment.
Which stands out! Sam left his dad on bad terms, he frequently shares his frustrations with his whole childhood and the way his dad raised him. And in this very episode Sam mentions how Mary is nothing but a story to him.
It's so interesting to me, that he's willing to show his parents to Jess. But not Dean. Although we know he has spoken of him, clearly quite fondly, from Jess' reaction to meeting him, he doesn't broadcast the fact he has a brother. Likely due to how intense his relationship with Dean was, he never wanted to leave him specifically and to constantly be reminded of that? That must hurt.
Sam and Dean's relationship is sacred, it's his. And it takes very little convincing for Sam to join his brother again, not because John needs help, but because its Dean asking to not have to do this alone.
Then there's the actual woman in white. Where Sam clearly states that she can only kill unfaithful people, which I think is very deliberate and specific to then brush aside.
And personally, I do not like the easy surface explanation that he "will be" unfaithful being due to the ghost then forcing himself on him. Because yes, vengeful spirits are cruel and going to look for loopholes, but that doesn't make him unfaithful. As he has no want or intent in this.
No, to me "you will be" talks about intent. Because the woman in white picks up her victims on the side of the road, she does not know their life story and whether they've cheated. But she can sense the type of person they are, the intent.
We do not get confirmation that the man we see her kill did in fact cheat beforehand, but its clear that he was willing to from the way he oggles her and takes up her offer to go home with her.
Obviously, in this case she is targeting Sam because he's trying to stop her, but I do not agree with the idea this rule can be so easily broken because then what's the point in stating it at all.
No, saying "you will be", meant she sensed his intent, his want. Maybe he was not actively thinking about cheating on Jess, but returning to his brother? Letting himself get close and chase after this intense relationship again? Keeping all that behind Jess' back and knowing full well that if Dean said he needed him, he'd be right back in that car again the moment he asked.
Choosing to leave behind his perfect normal life with Jess, even temporarily, to join Dean is him choosing Dean.
The moment Dean showed up in his house, his faith wavered. Because Dean is the burning flame that continues to draw Sam in again and again.
An analysis of Jimmy McShane, the proto-Jimmy Novak from Jeremy Carver's original outline of 04x20 The Rapture
I read the original draft of The Rapture, in which the Novaks are actually the McShanes. (the document can be found here) My main takeaway from this outline is as follows:
Jimmy McShane is an everyman. Jimmy Novak is not.
A post and its tags from @autisticandroids and @ellicler respectively pointed out that Jimmy Novak, despite having the quintessential 'normal life' that is often framed as the unreachable ideal for hunters in Supernatural, is not an everyman character. As the latter put it, he is "by turns too sincere too manic too naive - maybe the most sympathetic portrayal of christian fundamentalism i've ever seen?" They go on to point out that unlike Supernatural's 'typical dude' or even typical (civilian) father, he doesn't really perform traditional masculinity at all -- he's not making an attempt to put himself in control or call all the shots (for an example of this, see the scene where he's quick to make a compromise with Amelia and doesn't offer any pushback when she says she's not ready to fully let him back into their life - even though he didn't hesitate to get back home by whatever means necessary against the Winchesters' very reasonable concerns. He clearly doesn't consider himself a more rational person than his wife) as a "man of the house" probably would, despite appearing to live a pretty culturally conservative life in general. He's not angry at Castiel, aside from maybe the scene where he yells at the sky because he thinks Heaven abandoned his family -- we can see that his anger even deflates into frustrated resignation about halfway through his speech.
While I hadn't really thought about it one way or another before seeing the post, I agree with them -- Supernatural undeniably has a 'normal guy' mold, and Jimmy does not fit in it. I think this was intentional on the part of the cast and crew, but if somehow Misha Collins was trying to portray Jimmy as someone who fit that mold, he failed spectacularly and gave us a much more compelling character instead.
TL;DR, the man that Castiel's vessel belongs to in the final cut of the show is kind of weird -- and this brings me to what I'm really here for:
Enter Jimmy.
(that was actually my impression of Heaven ordering Castiel to take a vessel. Now--)
[Enter Jimmy McShane.]
When we compare the outline to the final script, it’s important to note that we are dealing with two different Jimmys here -- The rest of this post will detail every contrast I noticed.
The most obvious difference between Jimmy McShane and Jimmy Novak is that the former is not religious (at least not very) -- certainly not the "devout man" that Castiel described in 04x01, implying that this iteration of Castiel was either lying to Dean or was misinformed by Heaven about his vessel's background.
While Jimmy McShane isn't very religious, his wife Amelia is -- Instead of a scene where Jimmy says grace before having dinner with his family, we get a scene of the family celebrating Christmas Eve at home. While Claire [clumsily wraps presents on the floor] - which is a really funny detail to me for some reason - [Amelia is trying to convince Jimmy to take the family to Midnight Mass tonight, for the first time ever--she thinks Claire is old enough to appreciate it now.] -- I think this reference to Mass is the only mention of what faith Jimmy's family follows -- they're almost definitely meant to be some variety of Christian in the show, maybe even Catholic like they are in the outline, but I don't think they ever confirm it - though there might be an obvious tell that I'm just missing.
I think it's plausible that Jimmy Novak would be reluctant to go to church at midnight even before Castiel, but it definitely wouldn't be for the same reasons as Jimmy McShane. [Jimmy rolls his eyes--for starters, he thinks church is creepy, much less Midnight Mass...And what's it all for, really? So he can wake up exhausted on Christmas Day? No thanks.] -- This is obviously a far cry from Jimmy Novak. I could see Dean Smith or another human AU Dean saying something like this, which I think strengthens my take that Jimmy McShane fits Supernatural’s ‘normal, everyday, not-hunter guy’ archetype in a way that Jimmy Novak just doesn’t.
Amelia and Jimmy continue discussing Mass. [“I’d just like her to understand Christmas is about more than Santa Claus and shiny presents.” Jimmy grins: “Since when?” Amelia’s stubborn as her husband though--she's taking Claire whether he comes or not.] -- Amelia is clearly more religious than Jimmy in this draft, and while I do think it would be interesting if she spent months watching her previously faithless husband start believing that an angel was talking to him out of nowhere, I ultimately like the theme of an angel leading Jimmy to lose his faith too much for me to say that the McShanes' dynamic is better.
In the notorious hand-boiling scene, we get confirmation of the groundbreaking fact that Jimmy was supposed to be making pasta. While the Jimmy we see looks unfazed by the radio whining in the final cut, the outline has him desperately try to ignore it. [A CEILING LIGHT begins to BURN BRIGHTER and BRIGHTER...finally blazing down on him!] -- The ceiling light would've been a cool detail and I imagine Jimmy Novak would've been even more dazzled by Castiel if he'd made the electricity go crazy like in 04x01, but the lights and the radio aren't enough to win over Jimmy McShane, who [does his best to ignore them both, anxiously stirs a POT OF SAUCE. Grows more and more agitated. Finally, he angrily snaps: "No...no...shut up! I told you...you're not real!" Obviously...this isn't the first conversation Jimmy's had with a radio and a bright light in the past few months. He listens for another moment, sneers: "Oh, you're gonna prove it? Oh, yeah? How?"] -- A pattern here is that Jimmy McShane is a bit more combative in general and especially towards Castiel, which tracks with him not being as devout. Even putting the faith aspect aside, this really doesn't read like Jimmy Novak to me either. Actually, it sounds like Jeremy Bradshaw from Bridgewater -- over a decade later, Misha Collins ended up getting to play this kind of character after all. (I also want to say the visual of Jimmy anxiously stirring a pot of pasta sauce as he tries to ignore his hallucinations is really funny. 'Crazy? I was crazy once. They put me in a kitchen. A midwestern kitchen. A midwestern kitchen with angels. And angels make me crazy. Crazy? I was crazy once. They put me in a kitchen--')
When Amelia catches her husband with his hand in the pot of boiling water and screams, [Jimmy yanks his arm out of the water, smiles oddly at her, dreamily: "It's okay...it's okay...look, I'm fine...it's a miracle, like he said...he's real!" Amelia stares at him, shocked: "Who's real?" Jimmy: "Castiel. The angel."] -- Since Jimmy McShane didn't believe the voice was real before, I kind of wish this outline showed the excruciating process of Castiel trying to convince him to stick his hand in the pot. Did Jimmy say he didn't trust him and make him do some other miracle first? Did he carefully dip one finger in, fully expecting to get burned? Did he say 'Fuck it, I'll burn my whole hand' and shove it into the water because he was that desperate to make the voice stop?
In the scene where Amelia tries to convince Jimmy to take antipsychotics (?) and he refuses, she refers to said pills as [his meds] -- has he had an actual psychotic break before? This was a thing I wondered about while coming up with my backstory for Jimmy Novak, since (correct me if I'm wrong) it's not that easy to get prescribed antipsychotics. Past mental history aside, Jimmy McShane knows at least part of what Castiel wants from him. Jimmy insists [what's happening to him is real. Amelia shoots back--"So, Castiel the Angel has chosen you?" Jimmy: "Yes, he wants me to give myself over to him completely."] -- This implies that Jimmy McShane, probably because he doesn't trust the angel, asked why Castiel wanted him. When Jimmy tells Amelia that Castiel said he was chosen because it was 'in his blood' and Amelia asks what that means, Jimmy says ["He didn't tell me, I don't know...I wish I knew." But Jimmy does know one thing--Castiel also told him the world was ending. Amelia explodes: "You know who says that, Jimmy? Crazy people!"] -- I don't know for a fact that the writers intended to copy this line almost verbatim from Yellow Fever Dean, but remind me to make another post compiling Dean/Cas | Amelia/Jimmy parallels because there are more than you would expect from the <2 episodes we got of the latter couple.
Additionally, Jimmy's reaction to Amelia's lack of faith in him is very Cas-like: [Jimmy shrugs, genuinely upset she doesn't get it, but what can he do? The world is ending, he can help save it...doesn't she realize he's trying to protect her and Claire?] -- Call this a stretch and I know it wasn't an intentional parallel, but does this sound to anyone else like Castiel's justification for opening Purgatory? He wants to save the world and the only way he can do that is by taking God's place, he wants to protect Dean and Sam, but Dean can't see it his way and is trying to get him to stop. Is this anything?
Amelia tells Jimmy that she's going to take Claire to her mother's house and urges him to get help. [Jimmy walks outside, stops in the middle of the driveway, a regular guy overwhelmed by a force he doesn't understand.] -- This is another big difference between Jimmy McShane and his canon counterpart. Jimmy Novak isn’t exactly a 'regular guy who doesn't understand,' he's someone who's probably been reading about God choosing seemingly unremarkable people his whole life and he certainly thinks he understands Castiel, as much as any human could understand something holy -- as he stands in the driveway, he may be thinking of Abraham, of Mary, of Esther, of Noah, of the prophets-- it isn't because he's egotistical or thinks he's better than anyone else; it's because he knows that people who don't seem like anything special can still be chosen to help fulfill God's will. This is why Jimmy Novak doesn't ask "Why me, Castiel? Why me?" -- The explanation of 'blood' is more than enough for him.
Jimmy McShane tells Castiel that he's going to lose his family if he doesn't tell him what to do, but he doesn't make Castiel promise that his family will be safe -- apparently, whatever vision Castiel showed him in this version was enough to assure him that they would end up okay.
After finding him in the warehouse, Sam and Dean end up helping Jimmy get back home. I think that Jimmy actually escaping from them in the final episode solidifies his position as kind of a rebel when it comes to doing what he thinks is right even if it’s ill-advised, and it also mirrors the Winchesters' habit of doing short-sighted things for the sake of family. (Not to mention the parallel between Castiel and Jimmy -- true followers of God who nonetheless can't be controlled.)
Jimmy McShane has a bit of a hero complex. Maybe you could argue that Jimmy Novak does too, but even if he does it isn't much compared to what he has in this outline. In the scene where he tries to keep his family in the pantry to hide from the demon and Amelia argues with him, he [insists he's saving her and Claire!] When Claire runs out of the room a minute later, [Amelia moves to chase after her but Jimmy shoves her back--it's too dangerous, he'll take care of it!] -- While Jimmy McShane still isn't exactly the most manly man, he's definitely closer to filling the role of the taking-charge "man of the house" than Jimmy Novak ended up being. He’s obviously trying to protect his family, but the reason he believes he’s in a position to do so is that he happens to be the one Castiel spoke to.
Where Jimmy Novak still held on to hope that he'd be able to see his family again eventually, Jimmy McShane genuinely doesn't seem to understand why the demons would go after him -- no one said anything about demons to him until they showed up. [Jimmy just doesn't get it--he thought this was over. Sam shakes his head, tells Jimmy, apparently, it's never over.] Sam being the one to tell him this is probably significant in that Sam also used to have a 'normal life' before the supernatural took it away. Under the assumption that Jimmy Novak isn't meant to be a so-called 'regular guy,' this draws even more of a parallel between the two -- Jimmy, like Sam, never truly had a chance to belong in an apple pie life.
Jimmy asks what the demons could even want with him. [Dean explains what Anna told him and Sam: Jimmy's an angelic vessel, vessels are rare, not just anyone can be one...any moment, a big-ass angel could step inside of him and start kicking demon butt. So, of course demons would want to smash him.] -- In my opinion, an explanation like this should've ended up in the episode. After all, we know that Jimmy is a ridiculously strong vessel in canon -- His body held fully-powered seraph Cas along with the millions of Purgatory souls, and only all of the Leviathans working together to destroy it could manage to start breaking it down from the inside. A seraph, an archangel, and the king of Hell all shared the vessel at one point. The angel Hael tried to make Castiel let her in because his vessel was more durable than hers -- he never developed lesions like Lucifer's vessel or Hael's vessel. Jimmy Novak does get an explanation for why he has to stay away from his family in 04x20, but all Sam says is that the demons want to know what makes him tick -- the Winchesters don't mention that angelic vessels are rare or that demons are trying to eliminate them from existence, since the longer exposition from Anna was cut. The explanation also gives more weight to Jimmy's concern for Claire; if he's a vessel that the demons want dead, there's a chance she is too. He understands that he needs to let his family leave without him if he wants to give them a chance at being safe.
Jimmy yells at the sky when Amelia and Claire are captured. [Jimmy paces, alone, his mind in knots. Back and forth, back and forth, finally he speaks. Quietly, urgently, a prayer--to Castiel. Jimmy gets it, he can never get out of this, he can never go home again...he just wants to know a home is there. He begs Castiel to save his family, begs him to take him back: "I will give myself to you completely, for the rest of my life. Please."] and if that line had made it in, I can't say for certain that I wouldn't have been a jimstiel truther. Anyway, this is a rare instance of Jimmy Novak being the more assertive Jimmy -- he's upset with Castiel for breaking his promise. Additionally, Jimmy Novak's prayer says nothing about his fate; the promise was only for his family and he doesn't have the energy to think about anything aside from Castiel's apparent betrayal.
When Castiel approaches Jimmy using Claire's body, the 'offer' is different. [Cass moves to stand over Jimmy, who bleeds through his shirt, on the verge of death, but still alive. Castiel: "You will never go home again. You won't even be able to say good-bye. Do you agree?" Jimmy throws one last look at his wife, stares into Castiel (and his daughter's) eyes, and nods. He agrees.] -- This is a VERY important difference. Jimmy McShane agreed to being possessed again while praying to Castiel -- he explicitly offered himself to save his family, and yet Castiel takes Claire anyway. There could've been a tactical reason for this; maybe Claire was already injured, or maybe Castiel was already possessing her when he prayed -- the point is, Jimmy is not put in a position where he's seconds away from death and his guaranteed paradise. He's simply resigned to his fate. I think that Castiel could've had a few reasons for intending to take Claire and let Jimmy die in canon -- my personal take is that despite being freshly brainwashed back into obedience, Castiel still respects Jimmy for his service and wants him to get the rest he deserves. Castiel expects to return to Heaven after his mission, so he believes that he would've done his part for Claire by leaving her vessel within the coming months, or a hundred/a thousand years if it's necessary. He doesn't understand why a human would object to being 'dropped off' after centuries of possession -- he believes that as long as they can return to their body eventually, it's okay. I think the Castiel of this outline comes off as more manipulative; he already has Jimmy's consent and yet he uses Claire's face to convince him to agree to his terms. Ultimately, I prefer Jimmy's sacrifice like we ended up seeing.
Now, starting from the beginning of the episode outline, let's get into some of the relatively minor changes that are nonetheless important in defining the difference between the McShanes and the Novaks.
Like in the final cut, Jimmy can't remember much about being possessed. Interestingly, here he tells the Winchesters that [He does remember saving their asses once or twice,] meaning that either his memory of the situation was further nerfed in the rewrite, or that the final version of Jimmy is a little less cocky than his original counterpart. (I personally think it's both -- Jimmy Novak can't really remember what happened externally while he was possessed, and if he did, he wouldn't take credit for what Castiel had done. Jimmy McShane's line reminds me a little of Pixar's Joe Gardner on his body being controlled by someone else, or even John Malkovich in Being John Malkovich.)
[Dean has to ask: "So...what was it like being rodeo'd by an angel?"] (side note: if the writers included that line in the final episode, destiel would’ve never let them hear the end of it) [Jimmy smiles grimly--"Man, if I only knew what I was getting into." He tells Dean being a servant of the Lord was far more of a clusterfuck than he'd ever dreamed.] -- I feel like the grim smile combined with the fact that he remembers more about being possessed point to Jimmy being more jaded and cynical about the situation here than he is in canon. He also mentions that he was shot, then healed, then stabbed, then healed, which isn't much of a departure from what he ended up saying in 04x20, but the phrasing made me realize that he's probably referring to Dean shooting and stabbing him in 04x01, which is pretty funny. Another example of Jimmy McShane remembering more specific things is when he says that he [once found himself standing on the summit of Mt. Everest] - presumably while Castiel was having a conversation with another angel.
In this draft, [Dean and Jimmy form an easy bond--two very reluctant soldiers of God.] -- While this is nice and all, I ultimately like that Jimmy Novak has been given his body back only for an important part of him -- his faith -- to be missing after everything he's been through.
When asked what he does know if not what Castiel was trying to say, Jimmy McShane [thinks for a beat, his face suddenly full of pain: "I know I had a family. I want to go home."] -- This isn't too different from Jimmy Novak's reaction to the same question. I just wanted to say that I liked Misha's portrayal of a 'face full of pain' in the final cut.
[Dean asks what Castiel really knows about Dean's fate, about the angels' ultimate purpose for him, but, again, Jimmy has no idea--Castiel shielded that from him. But Jimmy does know one thing--he knows of Castiel's doubt. He knows Castiel doesn't even think God is calling the shots anymore. Dean: "That's troubling." Jimmy nods, that's not even the worst of it--"Castiel doesn't think this is winnable anymore. He thinks the apocalypse is coming."] -- It's interesting to me that this draft had Dean find out Cas's issue with Heaven before 04x22. I personally think that this would've been too early for him to learn that, but it would be cool if we as the audience somehow found out later that Castiel was having these kinds of doubts and was forced to forget them -- maybe years later (like when they introduced Naomi's operating room) they could've given Cas his memories back, or maybe they could've come back naturally over time or something.
Before Jimmy gets on the bus to go back home, Dean asks him one last question. ["How can you go back to potlucks and Monopoly knowing the apocalypse is coming?" Jimmy thinks on that a quick beat: "Happily." And he's gone. Dean stares after him a moment, quiet, envying him-- "Lucky bastard."] -- There are a few ways to take this. One is kind of similar to Zachariah's Endverse Cas - 'The world is ending anyway, why not have a good time while it lasts?' Something immediately felt off to me about the idea of this coming from Jimmy Novak because it feels incompatible with sacrificing his Heaven for Claire (which, again, Jimmy McShane did not do) -- but logically I can't find a definite reason he wouldn't say this if he knew for a fact that he couldn't do anything to help stop the world from ending, aside from the fact that it's a bit of a dickish thing to say to a guy who has no normal life to go back to because he's too busy saving people from monsters - so I chalked my instinct that this is ooc up to not aligning with the way I write Jimmy Novak -- and as much as I like my characterization of Jimmy it obviously has no effect on who he is according to the actual writers so I'm letting this line slide. (Kind of -- stay tuned because this isn't the last thing I have to say about what Dean specifically said here in this draft.)
When Jimmy returns home after so long and Amelia is shocked to see him, [Jimmy gives a sad smile, assures her it's okay, it's him, it's really him. Amelia starts to cry, they'd given up looking for him, they thought he was dead! Jimmy can't bear to see the pain on her face, assures her again and again: he's okay.] -- I like this because I like Amelia and Jimmy’s relationship as it’s portrayed later on in the show, but I think I prefer Amelia being either in shock or numb here after everything that happened like she ultimately was in canon. Amelia’s sentiment in this draft appears in their s10 reunion in Heaven and I think it fits better there.
Jimmy tells Amelia that he had a psychotic break and wandered for months before he finally got help, and that he [didn't call because he was too ashamed, didn't want to bother them until he got himself straight. That's why he's here. He's good now--angels aren't real, the world isn't ending, that was all in his mind. (Obviously, he's lying.) Amelia studies him--he certainly sounds sane. Still...what does he want? What does he expect to happen here? Jimmy: "I just want to come home." Amelia stands there, conflicted--Jimmy's the love of her life, he is, but after all that's happened, after how he acted, how can she be sure it won't happen again? She's just not sure accepting him back so quickly is the right thing to do here. Jimmy feels her doubt, understands, suggests maybe they take baby steps. Start smaller. Like...how about dinner?] -- This is good insight into what Amelia is thinking. It's possible that she was the one who experienced a loss of faith after Jimmy left in this version.
Amelia lets Jimmy have dinner with her and Claire. [Claire rushes down the steps, Jimmy takes her in, his heart-bursting. "Hi, Daddy." "Hey, Baby." Amelia apologizes as she serves SANDWICHES--it's all she had in the pantry. Jimmy motions for her to sit, stop apologizing--"It's fine. It's more than fine...it's perfect."] -- Again, this is nice, but I think Amelia Novak's kind of sassy line about the sandwiches "It'd better be okay, it's all we have" speaks to her reluctance about letting Jimmy back in after how long he was gone.
Crucially, Claire McShane doesn't point out that Jimmy McShane didn't say grace, because saying grace was never a thing he did. Instead, [Jimmy takes in his two girls, grows emotional. Claire notices, asks why he's sad. Jimmy smiles--he's not sad...he's happy.] -- In this version of the scene, he's most likely telling the truth about why he's crying. Faith wasn't a big part of his life.
The neighbor/family friend knocks on the door. His canon name is Rodger, but he's Jack Tracey in this outline. [Jimmy pokes his head into the hall, breaks into a grin--"Hey, Jack!" They embrace. Goddam, Jack is pleased as hell to see his buddy back in one piece. He's okay? Jimmy assures him he is. Jack takes a long, concerned look at him, speaks quieter: can they talk? Amelia gets the hint, volunteers to go get the boys some beers.] This may seem like a silly thing to focus on, but stay with me: two beers in the outline. In 04x20, Amelia only offers Rodger a beer. She likely sees Jimmy's mental state as unstable despite seeming back to normal because of what he did before, so she might still consider him fragile. Stay with me a little longer: playing Monopoly, going to potlucks, drinking a couple beers with your buddy - these are adjacent to the 'sheltered suburban man' archetype that occasionally appears on the show, and are notably not mentioned adjacent to Jimmy Novak like they were with Jimmy McShane. Jimmy Novak does NOT represent a midwestern average joe. He does not fit in the mold. He is other.
'Rodger' (or 'Jack' in this case) reveals himself as a demon while Amelia is out of the room and only Jimmy can see him, just like he does in the show. In the final version, Jimmy responds by hitting him with what I think is a candlestick. What does our man Jimmy McShane do, you ask? (No one asked, but you should've and here's why:) [He SLAMS JACK IN THE FACE WITH A GOLF CLUB! Jack crumples to the floor as Jimmy savagely beats him again and again with the club! AMELIA SCREAMS--what the hell is Jimmy doing!?] -- Wait, back up--
That's right.
Jimmy McShane hits the demon with a golf club.
A golf club.
Jimmy Novak does not own a golf club.
Jimmy Novak does not play golf.
He does not fit in the mold.
Author's note: I'm not crazy. This is God's will.
Anyway, Jimmy shoves Amelia and Claire into the pantry to get away from the demon. As the adults fight over whether any of this is real, Claire escapes -- this is different from the final cut, where Amelia encourages Claire to run.
When the McShanes escape their house with the Winchesters, we see [A SERIES OF QUICK CUTS] showing their getaway. It's unclear when exactly Amelia got possessed (in both the outline and the final episode) - but this bit is a good candidate, as is the later scene in the parking garage while Sam and Dean hotwire the car. I think the quick cuts could've illustrated the chaos that kept anyone from noticing the demon possessing Amelia if it was in fact meant to be here.
I like how the outline describes the thought process of the demon. She [marvels at her good fortune--this was just supposed to be some easy-peasy day job wiping out Jimmy the Schmoe...now she gets Sam and Dean Winchester? And a defenseless, powerless Sam Winchester to boot? There's gonna be a plaque somewhere down in Hell with her name on it, that's for sure.] -- Note that Amelia Novak's demon describes her job as "picking up an empty vessel" as opposed to wiping him out -- the outline heavily implies that murdering confirmed vessels and their blood relatives is a thing that demons do. Sam vaguely alludes to it when he explains why Jimmy can't go home, but I'm not sure why the episode buries the lead on the fact that the demons want to kill Jimmy and Claire specifically because they're suitable angelic vessels, and that the demons are trying to eliminate as many vessel bloodlines as they can to make it harder for angels to come to Earth and get in their way.
Castiel possesses Claire, but we don't get Jimmy's awed acknowledgment as he starts to bleed out that Castiel didn't abandon him and/or horror that he used Claire as a vessel. The outline also doesn't mention Castiel watching Sam drink demon blood straight from the source.
Dean also acknowledges the fact that Castiel possessed Claire: [Dean: "How? How are you in her body?" Cass: "It's in the blood."] -- If they'd kept this exchange, they obviously would've made it sound a little more natural than it is here in the outline, but I honestly think it's kind of funny that no one ever mentions that Cas possessed Claire ever again. Yes it would've been great for angst purposes, but it's such a Supernatural writer thing to do to never acknowledge it. I think it's the first time we as the audience see direct confirmation that angels can just switch vessels like that - and yet Cas comes back in Jimmy's vessel for almost twelve years to come.
In conclusion, Jimmy Novak is a lot of things. A believer, a ghost in the narrative, a bit of a weirdo.
That's why he's interesting to write, even in the scope of the much more extraordinary universe he lives in. Despite appearances, his final incarnation doesn’t represent a one-off victim/witness character the same way that other ‘average joes’ do on the show.
Imagine you are a child. A youngest child. Your mum died when you were a baby. Your dad is…grief-stricken, obsessed, more of a drill sergeant than a father. But you aren’t alone. You have this brother. And he’s only four years older than you, but from the moment your mum dies he steps up as your parent, and he does his best but…he has the same parents you do. One dead, one whatever the hell John is. He has very little experience to go off as to what a good parent should be. But he feels like he needs to be one for you, so he tries, and he tries, and he’s your brother and he’s your mum and he’s your dad, and he’s sort of all you have, honestly. And he’s annoying, and over-protective, and however old you get he only ever sees you as his baby brother. Or his kid.
But you can’t complain about your parents to your brother because he is your parents, and your sibling, both. So in that you sort of are alone. But you don’t know any different, so you grow up thinking that that’s what a brother is, and then you grow up a little more and realise no, he was always trying to be more than that, and then suddenly you are both adults and you aren’t the baby hiding under your brother’s wing anymore, but you’re still stuck with him, this brother who insists on putting you first in everything he does, just like a mother would — but he’s not your mother, or your father, he is your brother, and he’s only four years older than you, an age gap that seems to get smaller and smaller the older you both get. And your brother — he’s flawed, and he has daddy issues, and he gets angry too easily and sometimes he hits things, which would all be very well if he was just your brother.
But he’s not just your brother, is he? He’s your parent, he had to parent you, he’s spent his life parenting you, which you never asked for, but he did it anyway because that’s just the kind of person he is, and for most of it he was a child himself and god he did his best and it wasn’t always enough but you are so grateful to him, anyway.
And now you’re both adults, two boys all grown up but he, he is…Not. Actually. It happened so incrementally, just like growing up, that you didn’t really notice until it was too late. But suddenly your strong, capable brother is a child. Which, to be completely honest…you don’t really know how to deal with. And, I mean, it does make sense to you, you suppose, because you’re clever, and you went to school, and you’ve always loved research, so you know how these things work now, a little. Your brother is a child now because, simply, he’s fucked up. From the trauma. The trauma of your childhood, right, but of course it wasn’t trauma when you were living it, it was just your life, and you didn’t know then that your brother was having to be someone so much older than his years because he’d been like that for as long as you could remember, but now he isn’t, and you are left with the child he should have been, who needs taking care of but still insists on taking care of you no matter what, and sometimes he kind of…can’t. Not like he used to. Because while you grew up, your brother grew down, and your brother who is your parent is suddenly somehow a child still — no, not still, he was never a child, but he is now, throwing tantrums and pouting and messing around, ever immature, frozen at the age you never got to see him be because you were a baby and then you weren’t a baby but by that time that person he was for such a short time was gone. Your brother stopped being a child at four years old. And now you’re finally old enough to try and parent him back…and he seems to need it. Your brother who never got to be a child is now very much a child, but he’s also still your parent, this child, and you are in your twenties and you have grown into a clever, sensitive, caring, capable young person and your brother…your brother has grown backwards. And you want to take care of him. But it’s hard, and he doesn’t let you, doesn’t want to let you, and he’s still the only parent you have so sometimes, deep down, you still want him to take care of you, and he does, and he does, and he does.
But the older you get, the less you need him, the younger he gets, the more he needs you — until you do need him of course, and then he is there, always there, reverting back to the person who saved and loved and cared for you as a child. And it’s sort of difficult to reconcile the two versions of him in your head. And you find yourself getting exasperated with his childish antics and then you find yourself smiling at him fondly as a glimpse of a much younger person shows through the shell of the soldier your brother was forced to become and then you find yourself getting angry with the overprotective controlling superior officer he tries to be and then you find yourself deeply grateful for the unshakeable big brother who saves your life over and over and over again.
And it’s disconcerting. And it’s difficult. But you owe him everything and you love him even more and so you just keep living with it. With him. And you don’t mention it. And he doesn’t, because he’s him and he never mentions anything. And you wonder if he even notices that things he used to face without fear, blank as a brick wall, make him flinch now. If he realises the steady, dependable big brother he had to be when he was too young to be depended on is now a mess of turbulent, childish emotion. If he thinks back to his littler self and envies him his competence. You hope not. You hope not. You know now the weight he carried. At least a little. And you think, infuriating as he his…he deserves to be a child at least once in his life dammit, just like everyone else. So eventually, you begin to catch yourself smiling at him more and more often, and you begin to grow desperately fond of the parts of him that are still young, the parts littler you never got to see. And sure, he annoys the hell out of you sometimes. But you are grown now, and you are understanding, and patient, and kind. And you love your brother. So you don’t mention it. And he doesn’t, because he’s him. But you make allowances for him, and you step in front of him now sometimes, and you let him be who he is, as long as he’s not hurting himself. Basically, you step up. Because you can, because you’re older now, and you’ve realised that, in some ways, you are actually more grown up even than your big brother. And so you try your best to look after him. Just like he used to do for you.
dean and cas are so unbelievably tragic because they have such similar fears and wants but they manifest in two entirely different ways that actively work against each other
cus dean needs someone who will stay without asking, someone who'll stick around without him having to voice it because if he voices it the want becomes real and dean doesn't get what he wants, if he voices it it can be taken away, it can hurt him
and cas wants someone to ask him to stay, someone who'll look him in the eyes and say you, I want you, not because of what you can do, but because you're you, stay, but he never does because he doesn't think he's entitled, that he's allowed to have it, because when has he before?
so dean never asks and cas never stays, and dean thinks cas wants to leave and cas thinks dean wants him gone and when dean finally learns otherwise it is too fucking late and cas is gone for good and dean can't ask him even though he knows the answer now and I just...
