YOU ARE BEING TRAINED! THE TRICK USED TO KEEP YOU A SLAVEGIRL.
Psychology labs throughout the world agree that the best way to train an animal is “intermittent rewarding”. This powerful strategy produces dependency in ways that other people look on and cannot understand. It keeps the animal insecure, constantly craving reward and desperate to please. It encourages loyalty even to its abuser. It is known to work exactly the same with humans.
Here’s how it works : “Sit!” (Gives Treat) Praises: “Good dogl!” Sit! (No Treat) . Praises: Good dog! “Sit!” (No Treat) Silence. Repeat. Mix up intermittently.
It’s designed to send the animal into confusion and a mental frenzy of what did I do wrong? How can I get the treat and the praise again?
See how it works. Now, look at your situation.
In toxic relationships, the Narcissist metes out the rules, rewards or boundaries inconsistently. This is on purpose. You’d think this would make you run but it actually does the opposite. It will fuel your desperation to get the reward once again, keeping you hopelessly locked into the relationship.
The Toxic knows what I’m talking about. They will deliver a ping of validation when they sense you’re about to pull away, just to keep you tied to the relationship usually at your expense. But the good will be fleeting. That’s intermittent rewarding.
In the beginning, you were love bombed and told you were beautiful, witty, enchanting, the “one”. Then, without warning, you can’t do anything right. You think, what happened? What did I do? Why am I not good enough?
No. It’s not you. You’re just caught in the toxic cycle of love bomb, devalue and discard.
To keep you from exiting, the Narcissist will then love bomb you again. You exhale with relief. It won’t last. Doesn’t matter though. After the investment you’ve made in the toxic relationship, you are already trained to ignore the bad stuff. You are programmed, hooked and brainwashed into believing this is love.
The only way to get free, is to adopt a strict no contact policy. The sooner the Narcissist becomes a memory, the better off you’ll be. Get yourself educated on what got you to this point. Self-reflect and become self-aware. Your key to survival is freeing yourself from old Slavegirl patterns and learning to become Queen of you.
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