Thank you @jellyprower and @eve-pie for the ideas on a Ragatha character study! Believe it or not, but this is my first one.
If you like my work, please consider commissioning me or leaving a tip on Ko-fi (˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶)
Mothers daughter
★ Despite the obvious toxicity, Ragatha talks about her mother with hesitation, not hatred. Even after the yelling, the blaming, the tears, and the guilt- There's still some lingering attachment. A tiny part of her believes it was her own fault. That she deserved what happened.
★ It wasn't always bad. There were moments where she was happy. Like that time she won a fancy award in school. Her mother was so proud. She gave her a pretty new dress, one Ragatha adored! And paraded her around like a purse dog.
★She felt beautiful. Special. But Ragatha wasn't a daughter. She was a trophy. Something to show off instead of holding close. Growing up, that was the closest thing to love she knew. That it was what love looked like.
Ragatha stood in place, perfect posture, still as can be. Waiting as her mother adjusts the bow on her pretty new dress.
The fabric is soft. Purple. Perfect. “Smile, darling," Her mother coos. "You’re my little star.”
Her grip on Ragatha’s shoulder is just a bit too tight.
“You’re perfect today. Don’t ruin it.”
Ragatha smiles. She always does. She wants to be good. To keep her mom happy. Because when her mother’s happy, everything else gets easier.
Her mother beams. Not at Ragatha, but at the image of her.
“Everyone will be jealous,” she says.
And Ragatha felt beautiful.
★ "You’re lucky to have me." Her mother used to say. Reminding her of every sacrifice sheds made. Like Ragatha owed her for being born. Small gestures turned into debts. It's why Ragatha doesn't ask for much.
★ Public appearances were always a big deal. Hugs in public, silence at home. There are photo albums filled with smiling pictures of the two of them. An image of the perfect little family. But none of them carry happy memories.
★ She called Ragatha her "little miracle" when she did what she was told. When Ragatha cried or asked questions? She was "ungrateful" and "spoiled." Chastised for having an opinion. Nowadays, she still apologizes for things that aren't her fault.
★ Ragatha only brings it up when someone asks. The first person to do so was Kinger. "If I’d been quieter," she mumbles. "If I hadn’t cried when she yelled. If I’d smiled more-" Kinger whispers back. “You were a child.” Cutting her off. But Ragatha isn’t sure she believes him.
★ She’s so exhausted. But resting is selfish. Isn't it? There's others who need help more. Deserve it more. Like Gangle! Gangle deserves a break so much more than her. Yet, she still has the nerve to complain. Selfish.
★ Never was she taught how to say no. It's like pulling teeth to her. Not setting boundaries while adamantly respecting ones made by others. Ironic, all things considered. She's not like her mother, pushing people to do things they don't want to.
★ Because of her upbringing, Ragatha's terrified of being "difficult." Afraid of being "needy" or "ungrateful." Even though she never is. If anything, she's the easiest person to work with. But she can't see that.
★ Sometimes... She mimics her mother’s tone. The light sing-song tempo that comes out when she's pleased. The same one that told her she's "her little star." If she ever realized it -that would be a bad day. For all parties involved.
Another day, another adventure. This one happened to be a beauty pageant. With dress up thrown in for good measure.
The dressing room was a mess of color. filled with costumes, ballgowns, cat ears and crowns strewn across every available surface.
Pomni was enjoying herself. Anxious to see how she looked, but playing along all the same.
She gingerly held a pair of sunglasses in her palm. Turning it around with quiet thought.
"Oh! That one’s just perfect. You’ll be the star of the show!" Ragatha's voice called out. Her voice is bright and chipper. Moreso than usual. Almost... rehearsed?
The glasses didn't actually look good. They clashed with the dress shirt Pomni already had on.
"Uh, can I pick something else?" She says while lightly tugging on her collar.
Ragatha freezes. Her smile faltered. "Of course!"
She steps back.
"I just… I thought…" Struggling to find the words.
Her voice drops.
Ragatha flashes her a nervous smile.
"...Sorry."
