The DJD are dangerous mobster hit men, however when the big boss had a baby girl, their jobs got much harder. Killing without getting caught is one thing, keeping an eye on a five year old is far more complicated it seems
scenario: a group of psychopaths unwittingly become parents to an abandoned newly built found under mysterious circumstance
note: this is kinda short, i have a longer chapter in the works but i haven't been able to post for this story in a while and i really wanted to. this is more like a filler chapter to kind of set up everyone's personalities. some more light-hearted comedy.
prev: part 4 next: ---- start: part 1
CONSEQUENCES FOR IMPROPER HANDLING
summary: Helex brings you to the rest of them, only for the team to end up with a harsh scolding about how to properly hold a newly-built.
"What?" His tone is low, dangerous, almost daring when he says it--- its not even a question, its a statement because Tarn is convinced now that nothing can go right in his life.
But this does not scare Nickel, not in the slightest. She continues to look up at him, rather confused. Was she hearing this right or was Tarn trying to threaten her? Whats up with that tone? She raises an optical ridge, look at him dead in the optics with a boldness the others could only dream of mustering up in the presence of Tarn. She had a feeling he would take it badly but she’s prepared to deal with him.
“Are your audials glitching?” The medic asks, servos on her hip-struts as her optics narrow at the purple mech in front of her. “I said that there might be a chance the kid doesn’t understand what we’re saying.” She repeats herself flatly as Tarn takes in a deep in-vent.
His dream of an eternally loyal Decepticon might have to wait because his plans keep getting hit with one wall after another, continuously and its barely been a day since the sparkling has been on-board the Peaceful Tyranny. Within that time, the little thing has managed to nearly die on Nickel’s operating table, get lost in the hallways and now he’s being told that there is a chance that you might be functionally mute. How are they going to figure out your name? Do you even have one? How are they going to figure out the mystery behind, in Helex’s words, “the deadbeat slagger” who left you on Clemency?
Will they ever figure it out?
Slag it all, do you even remember how you ended up there?
Tarn can’t do anything other than take a deep in-vent, trying to make sure he doesn’t actually lose it because so far, the ‘sparkling ordeal’ has been agitating. He’s trying his hardest not to get angry… Nickel had specifically warned him about his Nuke dosage exceeding safe levels, an outburst would prove her right. He does not want that… its the last thing he needs to add to his many, many on-going pains.
“Then… how will we manage to get it to talk?” His tone is tired, accepting of his fate as he asks Nickel. She stops to think for a moment.
“Teach them.” She replies, the answer is obvious. Tarn lets out a heavy ex-vent, the situation is ironic in a cruel way— For once, Nickel lacks foresight and Tarn seems to be more considerate.
“You know that won’t work if we tried.”
“I doubt that.”
“Please, Kaon has been trying to teach Vos Neocybex for ages and the only words he’s picked up on so far are profanities.” they never should’ve taken the sparkling in, Tarn feels; had he known the pains of parenthood mentoring earlier…
“...true.”
Suddenly, Tarn has his comms connect live to Helex. Of course he went directly to the audio function instead of text, Tarn rarely opens the text channels and looking at the current 256+ unread messages, Tarn is glad he doesn’t but a part of him wants to beat the sparks out of them for wasting their time like that… they should be prioritizing their current mission! Not-
“Helex, reporting.” Tarn’s train of thought is cut off by the smelter’s gravelly voice.
“Speak.” The usual commanding tone returns to his voice, hiding the disappointment from the news he’d learnt moments prior.
“I found the kid.” Helex responds flatly. For a smelter, he had a more icy and cold stoic presence than anything, it reflects in the way he speaks sometimes. But finally, Tarn had real good news.
“Good work Helex. Return to the main hall… And I suggest you stay away from the text channel. For your safety.” Tarn cuts off the commlink and opens the text channel and he can see that once again, there’s some or the other petty argument unravelling within the confines of the channel. Sometimes he wanted to maul his team. The momentary joy he had from the good news is replace with a much more sour mood.
“Nickel, I need you to disable your audials for a moment.” Nickel has been with the DJD long enough to know that what Tarn said was a warning and she also knew what he was about to do, those sorry sods… She sighs and shuts off her audials, disabling them.
Tarn takes a moment to clear his voice.
“If you insolent fools care to know, Helex has managed to locate the sparkling unlike you torpid space-slugs. Return to the main hall immediately.” His voice goes dangerously low, soft as ever with his outlier abilities packaged in a voice note for the remaining team. All typing ceases and the channel goes dead. Good, Tarn thinks. He doesn’t even bother reading the messages prior.
However, the moment Tarn goes offline from the chat…
Kaon__:: Torpid space-slugs is a new one
Tesarus__:: Unnecessary.
Vos__:: i am goyng to kil elx
Elsewhere, Helex has managed to keep you relatively… not stubborn so far because you’re mindlessly munching your spark away on treats, you’re probably not thinking about anything else right now, thankfully. Though its coming at the cost of his snacks, Helex can live with this just fine. He can get go get some more back at his usual go-to energon stand… and maybe bring you along with him for taste testing. The giant smelter continues to think as his pedes thump against the ground loudly with each step, carrying you in his servos like you’re fine-china and he’s a reckless bull, he just doesn’t trust himself enough to not break something on your frame by pure accident. After he had managed to get you off of him, Helex immediately notified Tarn that he’s managed to locate and capture you and so Tarn said that they should all be at the main hall for a more proper introduction. Whatever the frag that means.
Helex stayed off from the text channel the moment Tarn said what he said, he knew what awaited him and didn’t bother even checking it out. Thinking about it… Helex probably should’ve told all of them instead of just Tarn….
Meanwhile, Tarn is speaking to Nickel about something Vos could really not care about in the slightest. He’s still wondering why they can’t throw away the little bot. The solution is right in front of them! Why can’t his fellow Decepticons see it the way he does? His spark still feels strange from that dose of ‘The Voice’... When Vos gets his hands on that overgrown furnace…! He didn’t even have the decency to let everyone else know first!
As Helex approaches the main hall, the other who were already there, waiting in silence, look at the sight before them…
Vos doubles down in laughter, it sounds like a screech almost, a cackle filled with amusement but its painful to the audials, perhaps maybe almost as much as Tarn’s outlier ability with the was Tesarus jumps at the sudden noise and Kaon chuckles. All of Vos’ prior animosity towards Helex is temporarily sated by how he’s carrying you as if you’ve got the Rust Plague or maybe even radiation sickness, Helex holds you by your pede with you dangling down as you gnaw on the last energon cube sacrificed to you. For some reason, you’re surprisingly pliant like this despite what anyone would’ve thought, maybe its because you have no thoughts… just enjoying Helex’s premium energon. His servo are out-stretched, holding you by the pedes far away from his frame. The size difference is comical, his one servo wraps around both your pedes and then some. It does nothing to help Vos.
“I found them in a vent. The thing can climb, clawed its way up.” Helex replies, seeing nothing wrong with the way he’s held you.
“...” Tarn has nothing to say, he just goes silent as Helex approaches him. You seem to occupied with your fuel to really care, not even a beat of acknowledgement. It confuses & surprises Tarn. You definitely were… unique in a way. Not so much like the usual whiny, crying sparkling he thought you would be. More keen, observant; you have a good intuition. You knew he was dangerous without even knowing anything about him or his team. A strong survival instinct, its a good sign of a soon to be Decepticon. Not to mention you can pull up your weight like that in order to climb. Your potential is undeniable. "Good work Helex."
“That's… impressive for its size.” Kaon mumbles as Tarn realizes there’s claw marks on the walls of his pristine ship and it won’t be easy to clean up, wonderful. Vos’ laughter dies down and the climbing detail registers in his processor, the fact that you can go through the vents means there’s a chance he might lose his go-to substitute corridor… just great.
“YOU BAG OF BOLTS, YOU AREN’T SUPPOSED TO HOLD A KID LIKE THAT!!! GOOD WORK MY AFT.”
It seems Helex can’t do anything right because a very sour Nickel approaches him with a frown so deep, you might think it was trying to dig through the floor of the ship. The sheer aura of a pissed-off Nickel makes everyone turn to look at the minibot as if she were the God of Wrath itself, a glare so hard that would make even the toughest crack into pieces like a glass vase and Tarn wants none of that, he steps away from Helex like its instinct to make way for the medic. No one knows if Vos has an intake behind his face-guard but if he does, he would’ve been smiling wide, gleefully. Helex’s shoulders sulk knowing what's to come. She was so loud that it knocked you out of your trance with the taste of real refined energon and you realize who’s around you.
Oh no.
It was something both you and Helex had registered in your processors.
He took you to them! Of course you couldn’t trust the big bot with lines on his faceplates! You flash a look of betrayal and distress of Helex who fails to pick it up with the looming threat of a angered Nickel. There’s an almost sympathetic look from Tarn as he’s moving away to mind his own business.
“Tess, hold them.” Helex gently hands you over to Tesarus who seemed to know the ‘right’ way to hold a sparkling. Dammit. Helex was hoping he’d mess up so it wouldn’t just be him having to deal with Nickel’s long tirade's.
May Primus have mercy on Helex.
The aftermath was Nickel having to teach all five of them how to hold a newly-built properly, very angrily.
