#thefirstdate

[bohemia-nocturna]

Recorriendo poco a poco los lugares que frecuentamos, una historia que debe ser documentada. (La primera cita)

[unstableinlove]

the first date

pulled in my driveway after hours of traveling back home from Arkansas and immediately started getting ready for my date. he took me to Waffle House then we drove around for hours showing each other our music. we ended up stealing a street sign. we went up to it and tried to inspect it to see what tools we were going to need to remove it. Cole was sort of gripping the post for balance when he looked at me with shock all over his face, I was about to ask him what was wrong when I watched him pull the entire sign out of the ground and start aggressively whispering, “GO GO GO”. when we went to say our goodbyes, I stared at him intensely in the way that screams kiss me! but it was only returned with a confused “what?”. I did not get kissed that night. he did however follow up with an “I had an amazing time” text so there was still hope.

[fatgirlsguidetodating]

Fatgirl dating hurdles example #2: the first meeting/date. For most of us it's easier to be ourselves from the anonymity of a screen. Especially those of us who are not happy with our looks. Though I do sometimes worry that I won't live up to the flirty banter from online when taken offline. In real life I can't even tell if someone's flirting with me half the time and I can't flirt with someone unless I know they have some feelings for me, but online it's easy. I suspect that I'm not the only one with this issue, and whilst this isn't limited just to us bigger girls, the difference is we bigger girls have a slightly higher hurdle to jump at the first meeting of an online guy. By this stage you've cleared the first hurdle (the looks test), have run the 9.13 metres between the hurdles and are now about to jump the second one- the first meeting. I suggested in my previous blog post that your photo shouldn't be super old, shouldn't be filtered out of all recognition and should try and show some of your personality. Because if you don't look at least pretty similar to the person in your photos you are going to crash to earth with your feet tangled up in the hurdle. I tend to talk to guys for a bit before I show a photo and then once they've seen it and are still into me I add them to Facebook so they can see more photos. Then if they are still up for meeting I'm in. But sometimes I wait too long and the whole thing just becomes someone you chat to online, nothing more. So don't wait too long after they've seen what you look like and are still up for a meet. Because if you don't take your internet chat offline ASAP you could have established a virtual rapport that can become awkward and stilted when it's got to translate into face-to-face. Experts say first impressions matter – especially when it comes to a first date.  Doing the right things on a first date sets you up to have amazing experiences with that person. The truth is first impressions count in *everything*. For example if you don't make a good first impression at say a job interview even if you are the most qualified the chances are you wont be getting that job. Let's admit it, the first thing we think about on our first meeting/hangout/hookup/date/whatever the cool kids are calling it these days is taking in how they look. So you want to look cool but not over the top (no sparkly ballgown but no trackie pants unless you are going for a run or walk), casual but not too casual, and, most importantly you want- no you *need* to feel comfortable in the outfit. You don't want to wear something so tight that you can't eat a thing without buttons bursting or heels so high you can only totter around like a newborn foal taking their first steps or something that regularly requires adjustments in case you flash side boobs. According to Dr. Joy Davidson, psychologist, sex therapist, advice columnist, speaker and author, says the stakes are higher for us women over men. "Remember that getting ready for a first ‘meet-up’ takes as much time and effort for a woman as a real first date. She’ll spend time doing her hair, applying her makeup oh-so-perfectly, choosing the right outfit—all of which is easily an hour or more out of her day. [Men] won’t be spending the same amount of prep time, so consider that her investment has already trumped [theirs] and make it worth her while.”   After all online dating is very different from meeting people in more conventional settings. You’ll have already spent some time conversing online and you’ll have seen photographs of each other, but still the first few minutes of face to face meeting is crucial. So what are the best tips for the first meeting? 1) Start off confident and friendly. First meetings are filled with tension and you want to try and make the whole thing more comfortable. Get the conversation started with some light, playful banter.  Don’t try and get to anything too personal just yet. 2) Make the date interesting. Look to make the first date experience fun and unique. Shared activities [like a fun, unique date] can take a lot of the pressure off of the conversation and give you something to talk about so the date doesn’t turn boring. 3) Show your interest. One of the best ways to show them you are interested is through touch. Touch them early and often throughout the date. If you are a woman you could, for example, briefly place your hand on his shoulder as you lean in to talk to him. If you are a man you could perhaps guide her by the small of the back as she walks through a doorway.  By mixing touch into your date you will be able to both show you are interested while building the sexual tension that exists between you. 4) Keep eye contact. Through eye contact alone you can create a deep connection with the person you are with. This is especially important in those moments when things go quiet. If an awkward silence comes, or you are not sure what to say or do, don’t dart your eyes around looking for help.  Let yourself relax by taking deep breathes into your belly, and maintain strong eye contact. 5) Be punctual. I know this should go without saying right? But it doesn't always. And take this from a perpetually late chick despite my best intentions every damn time! So I'd suggest arrive early so you don’t get there rushed and flustered giving the impression that time management could be an issue. Plan ahead for all eventualities! 6) Don't be on your phone. You'd think I wouldn't even *need* to say this right? But I do because many people automatically play with their phones, especially when nervous. So leave it in your bag or pocket or, if you don't trust yourself, in your car. So you've managed to get through the date without any major faux pas, you've chatted and gotten along well, without major awkward silences? Yay you! Now what? The end of a meet up date can be awkward- particularly if you already know you don't want to see them again. One thing I know I am is a coward when it comes to face-to-face confrontations or conflict. So rather than saying something like "I had fun but I'm not sure that we really gelled as a couple and would be better off as friends" I tend to either let them take the lead or say we'll talk again soon and then not talk. (I know, I know: ghosting is a cunt move. I don't do it to be a cunt but more because I'm shy on the best of days let alone letting someone down!) If, however, you do want to see them again then be assertive in letting them know that- they aren't mind readers after all. (Probably lucky given the thoughts many have on a first meeting!) Remember how we used to live by the three day rule? Well that's gone out with the last century. These days it's okay to message them later on letting them know you had a great time and would like to see them again. Or to say it before you leave them that night. After all they can only say no right? So there we have it: jumping the second hurdle and now heading for the third. The second date and, potentially, the first smooch. Fatgirl. Note: Wanna practise your dating techniques? Try this: "MyChanceRomance.com", a Chatroulette-inspired dating site, a place to practice that all-important first impression on women from the comfort of your own desk and chair.

[tothesnakewithblueeyes-blog]

March 28th 2017

[tothesnakewithblueeyes-blog]

March 28th 2017

This was the day those blue eyes caught my attention. We played and talked at the park for hours. When curfew was nearing we started saying our goodbyes. we both knew we didn't want to go but the pumpkin turns back into a mouse when the clock strikes 10.

[efron-the-saxophone]

We even filmed in our own rooms. #youtube #cinemason #cinemasonproductions #thefirstdate

[efron-the-saxophone]

Using our own personal rooms for YouTube video sets. #thefirstdate #YouTube #cinemasonproductions #cinemason

[efron-the-saxophone]

Drew disastrously all over my eyes then commercial style water splashed it off and here you have the result. Waterproof makeup definitely stays. #YouTube #cinemasonproductions #cinemason #thefirstdate