#thug nan

[thugnan]

The Haunted Carousel (PC 2003)

Story: 8/10

Characters: 9/10

Puzzles: 8/10

Chores:8/10

Final Rating: 8/10

This is another game I always come back to because I can get through it within a couple of hours. The setting is so fun and it was well executed, a haunted amusement park that didn’t try too hard to be scary. They world wasn’t as big as Ghost Dogs, but it worked really well in my opinion and the characters are some of the more memorable ones in the series. The history they tied into the game was interesting and unique. The puzzles (i.e. the arcade games you have to play to move the plot forward) aren’t too difficult or annoying like some of the later games (looking at you at Trail of the Twister). 

Plot (spoilers obviously)

Thug Nan is back at it again with the sleuthin, Paula Santos, is a friend of your fathers and owns an amusement park, how fun! Except there’s a whack ghost carousel that be a haunting. Thug Nan ain’t about that supernatural bs tho, and neither is Paula so we best be investigating. 

The carousel isn’t the biggest problem on the table, it’s the rollercoaster that stopped mid-ride and gots the park shut down. Paula is being sued and that’s not cool. 

You get straight to work and meet:

Harlan Bishop: It takes a thug to spot a thug, I don’t buy his “I’m just a security” story. Brother has done time. I know it and he knows it. He’s the current park security, extremely eager to help out and extremely Brooklyn, many much Brooklyn. He even took a pay cut to work at the park. He hooked a homie up with a fun pass to the arcade, but that doesn’t mean that I don’t have my eye on him. 

Joy Trent: My precious Joy, I have clear bias when it comes to this child. She could do no harm. Everyone describes her as boring but I love her. She’s the park’s bookkeeper, she only got the job because her dad, Daryl Trent used to own the park with Paula. He wasn’t the greatest with money however, and died broke af. My wonderful Joy obvs has all kind of childhood trauma but shh es okay, we can work it out together. 

Paula: Daryl Trent was p bad with money

Also Paula: *hires his daughter as a bookkeeper*

Ingrid: She’s the chief engineer who hustles essential oils on the side. I don’t understand how a woman of science can buy into the “curse” shizz, but whatever. She reads auras and pawns off all her actual engineer work on me. Can’t say I’m crazy about her. She blames the curse on the person who stole a super vintage horse from the carousel.

Elliot Chen: Homeboy gives a bad name to us artsy types. He’s the park’s art director. He procrastinates a ton and never meets his deadlines, which yes that is me but R O O D of you to assume. The park being shut down is awfully convenient for him. 

Tink: He operates the Carousel normally, but rn he’s on vacation in Canada, which you would think would be more suspicious, but no one questions it. 

Whilst investigating you discover: 

that the person who built the stolen horse (Rolf Kessler) was super famous and his horses are considered priceless or something

during a previous heist from the hotel next to the park, the thieves involved stashed moula all over the park. 

the horse that was stolen was a replica, so jokes on whoever stole it. 

Rolf Kessler was an artist and by default filled with angst and many much suffering. His waifu died of TB and he disappeared off the grid shortly thereafter. 

During all this, you get in touch with Detective Perris, who was the original detective in charge of the hotel heist. It was partially unsolved and he gives you some dirt on one of the peeps that was arrested for the crime. He died in prison, but his cellmate was from brookyln… SUSPICIOUS

Naturally, this means we gotsa snoop on Mr. Bishop. HOME BOY HAS AN APPOINTMENT WITH HIS PAROLE OFFICER, BRUH DID I CALL IT OR WHAT? It’s okay Harlan, Thug Nan has also done time in Alibi in Ashes, cos we ball hard.

More important than this new information, is my girl Joy. We are going on a journey to rediscover her childhood. And I can’t think of a more romantic wholesome way of getting to know each other. We do this with the help of Miles the Magnificent Memory Machine, which is a robot/toaster oven that Joy’s dad built her (I think I forgot to mention that her dad was an ‘inventor’), whose sole purpose is to remember things for Joy, because the passing of her mom was so traumatic that she blocked everything from her childhood behind a wall of extreme blandness. 

This. is. Perfect. The fanfiction is writing itself. Thug Nan also lost her mom as a child and now they’re connecting. What was I supposed to be doing again?

Oh right! Our love will have to wait Joy, I gots a mystery to solve. 

While you’re helping Joy recover her memories you also learn:

Mr. Bishop has been spying on Ingrid, but this helps you break into Ingrid’s office. 

Ingrid is ballin, like more than engineer money balling. It’s also implied that she’s in cahoots with the guy suing the park. 

Elliot is buying a lot of wood for no apparent reason, and horse tails, like if he were building a carousel kinda deal. Weird yes? 

Anyway Thug Nan is really prioritizing this Joy soul searching project. But then… B E T R A Y A L. Joy confesses to having stopped the rollercoaster that caused the park to shut down. How could she? How could she do this to us? She says she had a lot of pent up resentment after the death of her father and thought Paula didn’t deserve his half of the park. I will be the first to admit that this girl has baggage, but I STILL BELIEVE. We will get thru it. 

We still don’t know who is responsible for the ghost carousel. We also accuse Ingrid of being in cahoots with the guy suing the park, and she’s not lying to us but I still don’t like her. Allegedly her monies is coming from her “designing a roller coaster”, likely story. 

WHATEVER, I’m gonna finish the epic side quest of figuring out Joy’s backstory and making her love me. I honestly don’t know why we’re still at the park, I think Paula only cared about the roller coaster bit? I’m just saying that a carousel that turns on at night ain’t harming anyone. If anything she’s getting major publicity. 

We find out that Joy’s mom bought her a horse off the carousel for her birthday (I feel like that defeats the purpose of the horse but aight), AND SHE DIED THAT SAME DAY. Holy cow that’s harsh. We’re able to track down the location of the horse, which conveniently has the jewels from the hotel heist years ago, and a picture of Joy’s mom. Let’s just say that homie can get it too.

Incidentally, we stumble into Rolf Kessler’s workshop in the midst of this. We totally solved this mystery on accident, cool. But yeah we find the horse that was stolen (yeah, did I forget to mention that it was a different horse, I also had a hard time keeping track of the horses) and discover that someone has been making replicas and selling them on the black market. They’re been using the hype from the “hauntings” to up the value. 

The game tries to be sneaky by not dropping names here, but we all know who it be behind this…. Elliot. Naturally, in classic Nancy Drew fashion, he tries to murder(?) us, but we best him and the day is saved by Thug Nan, once again. Joy call me. 

THE END. 

[thugnan]

Ghost Dogs of Moon Lake (PC 2002)

Story: 8/10

Characters: 8/10

Puzzles: 7/10

Chores: 7/10

Final Rating:  7/10

Fortunately Her Interactive was able to redeem themselves in my eyes after Secret of the Scarlet Hand. Toning down the book trivia heavy plot, but still presenting history in an engaging and interesting way. They also expanded the world they built for this game compared to the previous games by having bigger map. I might be slightly biased because of the ties to the mob and mob culture.  Like Message in a Haunted Mansion, it tried to be spooky, but just enough that it wasn’t annoying. I’ve also played this one like 5 times and have never run into any sort of glitches. The story/plot was easy to flow through despite the expanded universe.  This had less character involvement and it strangely worked for it. The chores were tedious but not as bad as Secret of the Scarlet Hand, and they created a more linear storyline. 

Plot (spoilers obviously):

Thug Nan is visiting her friend um.. Sarah? I honestly don’t remember and I was playing this last night. I’m going to call her Scaredy McScaredy pants. Because by the time you get there b i t c h is G O N E. Some ghost dogs apparently scared her off, what a wuss. 

After you arrive, a tree falls behind your car, so you’re technically “stuck” until you can find someone to remove the tree. Which is fine, you’re not a coward, but boy is this house falling apart. I can’t imagine why anyone would make such a poor investment. But okay I guess the same could be said about the mansion in Message in a Haunted Mansion. 

When you call McScaredy she tells you that while you’re stuck there, you should do her chores for her, which is bullshit. Whatever Thug Nan wants to get a load of these “ghost dogs” that sound like a bunch of baloney.

Whatever, shortly after that phone call the house is “attacked” by “ghost dogs”, I’m sorry but I’m a skeptic. Even if I saw their glowing eyes with my own two non-glowing eyes, I will get to the bottom of this.

You immediately run into Red Knott, who is obvs your first suspect. He watches birds but only at night?(tempted to spongebob meme) And he hates everyone. If it were up to him the park would be axed and he would live among the birds as one of their own. Very suspicious, but we’ve got other suspects to meet. 

He tells you to bug off and then morning you try to get on McScaredy pant’s boat only to find out that you need to borrow a spark plug from that same dood that told you to bug off. G R E A T. But because this is a Nancy Drew game, we already know that it’s going to come with a catch.

Red “Ivan Vanko” Knott wants pictures of birds. And even tho he’s perfectly fine doing this during the night, I gotta wait till the morning to do this, peachy. 

In the morning I can boat places so I go meet:

Emily: Lady who runs Em’s Emporium, her store is filled with things that she stole found in the lake. She’s convinced there’s treasure in there, and hates that the lake is on park land because that means that she can’t be hustling. 

Jeff Ackers: Park Ranger, that wants to make the park BIGGER, something something about being power hungry. He’s kind of a goody two shoes. He doesn’t like that your friend’s property was sold to her because that means he can’t be promoted or something. 

RIGHT, I forgot to mention that the property used to be owned by Post Malone’s grandpa (tru fact), Mickey Malone, a tru american gangster who got convicted for tax evasion (remind u of anyone?). He had four dogs that he loved, and it’s allegedly them who are haunting the property. 

Looking for the birds, you find his grave, and the grave of his 4 doggos. But for some reason two of the birdos hate you, and after talking to Ivan Vanko, he tells you that you gotta get some of that camo and be a nerd. Thug Nan only does it for the sake of the ghost doggos. 

Except the bank of Thug Nan is running kinda low, you don’t actually have money. Emily makes you go bug hunting to pay for the camo. When you are finally able to snap a picture of the last bird, you discover that someone installed speakers on the house? Suspicious. But unfortunately you get knocked the eff out before you can investigate 

When you wake up, someone has tied you up in the shed and SET U ON FIRE. W T F. I literally have zero leads but okay sure. When you look for the speakers, they’re gone, so we’re back to square one. 

 The convoluted puzzle in the living room finds you a super secret passageway into the basement. There’s nothing much down there except rats and a journal that reveals that Jeff Acker’s great great grandaddy was best friends forever with Mickey Malone. 

When you confront him, he’s like what? Naa I ain’t got ties to the mob that would go against my goody two shoes vibe I’m trying to instill. Which reminds me, this  b i t c h ticketed ME when I almost died, something about a fire hazard. Eventually he fesses up, and admits that his g-pa was in cahoots with Mickey Malone. Which is great because you need to get in contact with MM’s ex gf. 

MM’s ex gf tells you about the speakeasy in Malone’s basement and how to get into it. You trade the picture you found of her for the key. You go a lurking… and find the said speakeasy, it’s smaller than we expected but I bet Malone gets that a lot (joking, don’t kill me). 

After pulling a bunch of levers, you find another secret passage, all these puzzles are dog related and ngl I’m not hating it. MM’s ex gf hated these pouches, but shiiii girl I’ll take them all. You solve more dog puzzles and you find the doggos, you best know that Thug Nan gonna take every single one of these home with her. You find magic dog toothpaste that glows in the dark (they never explain the glowing eyes????) 

Thug Nan is gonna unleash hell on whoever is keeping these precious babies in such a sketch place. You discover their journal, and it sounds like they’re looking for treasure. Which only Jeff and Em know about… Who are the only two real suspects let's be real. 

One you’re in the vault, you find the gold, the moula, i soldi, el dinero, if you catch my drift. That’s when Em shows up all like “homie das MY gold” and is about to yeet Thug Nan down a ladder if you don’t get out of there. Fortunately you manage to trap her in there till the po-po can take care of her. 

Once again the day is saved, thanks to Thug Nan legit carrying the entire investigation. 

I think Jeff is promoted, and Sarah Scardy Pants gets to keep the doggos. THE END. 

[thugnan]

The Final Scene (PC 2001)

Story: 7/10

Characters: 5/10

Puzzles: 7/10

Chores: 7/10

Final Rating: 6/10

Every now and then I’ll come back to this one because it is one of the shorter ones. The story line is straightforward, and there aren’t too many obnoxious puzzles. I don’t know if it’s because we’re brought back to the stage, I get some Stay Tuned for Danger vibes. It’s s little gitchy, but I’ve only been stuck (i.e. forgot to pick up something I needed later) once in the 4 times I’ve played it. The characters aren’t as memorable, but I enjoyed the setting and the idea of being trapped in a building for 3 days. This game is successful in regards to weaving the history of Henry Houdini into the plot without it getting too preachy.

 Plot (spoilers obviously):

Nancy is invited to a movie premiere screening by her friend Maya, who is working on an article for her university and was able to get early access. When she goes into the interview room however, she is kidnapped through a secret passage. 

Thug Nan snaps into action and breaks that door down, unfortunately we are too late. Not too late to answer a threatening phone call from the perpetrator. B i t c h don’t test me. The theater they’re at is scheduled to be demolished in 3 days and the culprit is just not havin it. He wants Thug Nan to stop it, or else Maya is about to be demolished too. 

No one tells Thug Nan what to do, so we go hustle everyone in the building:

Brady Armstrong: Whoopy, another Rick Arlen type, but slightly smarter? Brady’s dressing room is where Maya disappeared, he is the star of the movie so she was going to interview him. He was not in the dressing room at the time of her disappearance, allegedly. 

Simone: If I remember my last play through correctly, she’s not the culprit but boy do I dislike her. She’s Brady’s manager, and needs more of an attitude check than he does. She’s good and ready to exploit the hell out of the kidnapping scandal. 

(Nicholas) Falcone: Idk how this guy got in here, but he’s organizing a protest to protect the building. Makes one think that we should be keeping an eye on him, but tbh I don’t think he has the brain power for it. He’s one of my favorite characters regardless. #FightThePower

Joseph: Joe here runs the theater and shows zero concern for my friend’s safety, but appears to be the only one willing to try looking for her. 

Yeah for some reason no one here g i v e s   a   s h i t about your kidnapped friend. You call the police and even they’re like “homes we can’t do anything for 24 hours.” Which is a lie btw, if you ever find yourself in a situation where someone goes missing, please call the police as soon as possible. 

Thug Nan has to do everything herself, it’s fine we got this. Falcone is cool even tho everyone seems to hate him? Tbh he helps me the most, cause turns out his granny got jipped by the original owner of the theater, JJ Thompson. How ya gonna do my girl dirty like that Thompson? Thug Nan is going to have to set things straight.

After funking around with Houdini’s old magic “tricks”, we find the room where Maya is being kept it. Unfortunately, not only can we not reach her, someone traps us before we can do anything about it. Joseph helps us out, but by the time we get into the room, she’s gone. 

Also someone tries to electrocute us? Which is taking it a lil too far, but as we soon find out  this perpetrator is a little unhinged.

Meanwhile, Brady’s manager has a press conference, and you know what that means? I’m about to go thru people shit. We find out that:

Joseph doesn’t have a back up plan if the theater plans fall thru, his original plan involved moving to a small town with his brother to open a new theater, but turns out his brother is dead :C Smoking is bad kids.

Simone ordered the creepy AF funeral wreath someone delivered to the theater that morning. 

Brady needs help apparently because he thinks he’s being held hostage by his manager. Is it horrible that I’m having a hard time feeling bad for this guy?

We find out that Falcone’s granny wasn’t the only one Thompson ripped off, he tried ripping of Henry Houdini himself. He ended up having to sell off part of his theater, so technically, the current owner, B Thompson, doesn’t have the authority to bulldoze it down. 

Thug Nan gets in contact with Houdini’s decedent, who also doesn’t give two shits about the theater or our problems. But she puts us in contact with the Library of Congress to see if we can find something that can help us. 

On the third day, Thug Nan discovers that Brady is actually B Thompson. He thinks theaters are lame and is knocking it down to make some sort of ego-inflating museum(?). Thug Nan tries to talk him into delaying the demolition until they find Maya, but Brady is like “Nah, ThAt sOuNdS LiKE a PoOr PeOpLeS PrObLeM.” Fortunately, Falcone tells us that there’s a package from the Library of Congress for us. 

When we get to the projection room to use the projector to see the contents of the package (idk why son couldn’t send a paper copy but ok), the construction crew announces the ‘all clear’. We need to gtfo out there and pronto, but not without our gal Maya. The file from the Library of Congress implies that Falcone’s grandma owned a part of the theater. We also find a set of blueprints that show a secret passageway out of the projection room. 

It’s awfully convenient because Joseph shows up to lock us in there. There is no talking sense into him, he doesn’t appear to be all there, like bitch we’re all gonna die, they already announced the all clear. What’s the point of holding Maya hostage if they don’t know if she's in here??

In the secret passage, we find Maya, but there’s no time to get her out, we about to go down. We got to find a way of signaling that we’re in here still. Joseph CONTINUES TO NOT GET IT. He tries to stop me, which would kill all of us? I thought he wanted to stop the demolition? Which is what I’m trying to do? B I T C H WE’RE ON THE SAME PAGE! We may or may not blind him in self defense, but we manage to turn on the sign outside and stop the demolition. 

Turns out, Joseph's original plan was to kidnap Brady, but when Maya showed up in his dressing room unexpectedly, he defaulted to her. I just think it’s cute that he thought he could take on a physically fit adult male as a skinny af old man, but okay. 

Falcone and Brady become the bestest of friends and restore the theatre. THE END. 

[thugnan]

Treasure in the Royal Tower (PC 2001)

Story: 7/10

Characters: 6/10

Puzzles:7/10

Chores: 6/10

Final Rating: 7/10

I have this one still and I would rather pirate any other game in the series. The story is interesting but the puzzles and erraticness of gameplay drives me crazy. I’m pretty sure I’ve only played this one once, because the second time I tried to play it, I ran into one of those pesky glitches, and I didn’t care enough to go back and try again. I also don’t know if I’m the only person on this planet to find Professor Hotchkiss annoying af, if I didn’t need her help in the later games I would have totally stabbed her. This was the second game to try to weave history into the game, and it did it decently, I was just a little confused as to why they had to redeem Marie Antoinette’s character? It felt like they were making up their own alternate history as opposed to Message in a Haunted Mansion, where they used a fictional character to tell their story.

UPDATE: The glitches really took away from a solid game. Upon further evaluation I am giving it a better rating. It deserves a higher rating thank Secrets Can Kill for sure. 

Plot (spoilers obviously)

Finally after 3 attempted murders Thug Nan is cashing in on a well deserved vay-cay. Of course just because Thug Nan is on vacation doesn’t mean attempted murder took a vacation. Except no one was attempted murdered yet. Yet being the key word here.

Upon arrival we get snowed in immediately. We mull around this castle, eventually learning that someone broke into the library and vandalized it. Do I smell a mysteryyy?? You sure bet I do!

Your radiator tho, sounds like its about to explode so Thug Nan finds the guy managing the place and is like “u best fix my radiator”. This guy is no nonsense however, and is like “u best help me with these chores how bout da?” You get on those chores and on the way you meet:

Dexter: The manager, he’s angry all the time, but I totally kissed his ass to get on his good side. I’m sure this will work out in my favor later.

“Lisa”: Idr the culprit from my first play through of this game, but I don’t get good vibes from this girl at all. She’s a photographer allegedly. She is the first to spill the tea about the robbery. 

Jaques: *cue all French man stereotypes* I like Jaques, he seems like someone who could hang. He has a sad boi backstory where he bombed at the olympics and is on a path to redemption by the woman he loves. Could be a green card marriage, but yo this is the best episode of 90 day fiance. I think he works in the castle? 

Professor Hotchkiss: She wouldn’t annoy me so much if she would remember my name right. That’s mad disrespect yo. She’s a nerd, but so nerd that she doesn’t even have the respect of her peers cause she a lil wack. She’s writing a book I think. 

While Dexter is using Thug Nan for free labor, you get trapped in an elevator. Like wtf I haven’t done anything to piss off anyone yet. I’m only the errand girl. But by doing this the person unintentionally gave me access to the library so jokes on them! You discover that Dexter is looking for something in the library… suspicious. 

Upon further trespassing investigating, we learn that:

Marie Antoinette may have been in the super duper secret tower that’s attached to the resort

Dexter’s dad owned the resort

Dexter’s dad was also a chocolate milk tycoon 

Dexter was a webel, a real thug, my man even did time, so I better recognize. But his dad did disown him.

“Lisa”? More like “Lie-sa”! This girl isn’t who she says she is, she has a bunch of fake passports and identities.

Hotchkiss is batshit

You find your way into the super dooper secret tower and find… Jaques! How could u? He’s trying to saw his way into the tower like a suspect. He assures you that he’s only trying to finish what his grandpa asked him to do on his deathbed. Take a medallion and open some super dooper secret journal that may or may not be in a super dooper secret tower.

I like Jaques, so I give him the benefit of the doubt. MISTAKE. I go get the medallion from his locker and BAM, Thug Nan is knocked out cold. Idk what hurt more, the blow to the head, or the betrayal. 

When you come to, Jaques is convinced you stole the medallion. Okay so maybe he didn’t knock you out then. Unless its another ruse? Dexter congratulates you for finding the tower, and tells you a touching story about his dad taking him up to the tower when he was a kid. He’s like you should check it out, and I’m like holmes, I am ON it. 

I find a journal, but home girl failed the first semester of French so we gotta get someone to translate it. We drop it off with the batshit lady, and head out to find some medallions. We find one stashed in Dexter’s dad’s super secret garden. 

Next, Liesa gives us a “tip” about seeing Dexter take something to the shed. Out there we find another medallion, none of these medallions are the one that was stolen from Jaques’s locker. While you’re out there however, some b i t c h locks you outta the castle. Thug Nan is gonna freeze to death if we don’t figure out a plan. You turn on the ski lift as an SOS, and Dexter opens the door for you.

When you pick up your translated journal from Hotchkiss’s room you find… Jaques’s medallion! Thug Nan isn’t about to admit that she might have been KO’d by this punk granny, so she confronts her, and she says that some “maid” put that there… my peter tingle tells me this is probably Liesa…

With all three medallions in hand, I make my way to the tower again. Where I find a shiny diamond, which realistically, has no monetary value but something something about society and culture. 

Liesa has the audacity to show up, she’s a “jewel thief” by her own admission, and all I can say is, gurl this isn’t the old country, get a real job. This asshat pepper sprays me. But jokes on her because if I learned anything from Secrets Can Kill is how to yeet people down a flight of stairs. No one messes with Thug Nan. 

THE END. 

[thugnan]

Stay Tuned for Danger (PC 1999)

Remember opinions are subjective :)

Story: 7/10

Characters: 8/10

Puzzles: 7/10

Chores: 6/10

Final Rating: 7/10 

First one I ever actually beat, this game had the right amount of puzzles and was more linear and straightforward compared to its predecessor. The graphics aged decently, but some of the glitches didn’t. It’s easy to get stuck places if you didn’t pick up certain things earlier in the game. The story is one of the more interesting, and least ridiculous in my opinion. Little details were put in, and most were relevant to the plot. The characters I found very memorable. And I liked the option of being able to accuse any of the main players. Chores got a 6 because the audio mixer thing really should tell you when you’ve triggered breaking into the agent’s office.

Plot (spoilers obviously):

Dear ol’ Aunt Eloise must low-key be hoping I get murdered because she sends me into danger again. Rick Arlen is a dweamy soap opera star who is getting death threats. He’s kind of a dick, so I mean not surprised, but his ex-gf and co-star is worried about him so Thug Nan is here to save the day. 

We meet the sweetest, purest, most precious character in the entire series (plz bring her back), Mattie Jensen at her bougie apartment in New York. And I’m telling you now, that if anyone who’s ever played this game thought for one second that this beautiful child did anything wrong in her life, then yalls need to gtfo. 

She tells you about how Rick has been getting scary letters, and dead flowers, and poisoned chocolates, but isn’t taking it seriously. She also invites you to watch a taping of the show later. 

When you get to WWB (the studio), you notice that all the magazines in the waiting area have the letters cut out. I’m skeptical that the person who’s been sending the letters sat in the waiting room cutting out all the letters. I’m also skeptical that they went through the trouble of stealing them, cutting the letters, and bringing them back. You’re telling me a multi million company like WWB can’t afford to replace a couple of magazines every now and then. Okay, I’m thinking too much about this magazine thing.

We enter the taping and of course because we’re here a giant light rig falls from the sky and nearly kills Rick. He goes full Karen (rightfully so, but also u shoulda been taking those warnings seriously), and says he's gonna complain to his agent before storming off stage. We investigate and meet all the suspects:

Mattie is technically a suspect cause she’s an ex but we’re gonna ignore that.

Prop Lady: She does not hide her hatred of Rick at all, but I like her batshit shenanigans. I think her name is Mildred, and is apparently the heir to the WWB fortune. She may not be capable of murder, but she can afford to hire someone to murder on her behalf, just sayin.

Lilian a.k.a. The Director: Rick has apparently hit it and quit it with all the females in the building, and boy is Lillian salty about it. She hates everyone, especially me, she throws me out of the studio immediately. Jokes on her because no one can get rid of Thug Nan that easily.

Mattie is able to talk to her agent about getting me a job on set as an extra. We meet our fourth third suspect:

Dwayne Powers: Dwayne is my favorite character in the whole series probably because he’s the worst, and not in a good way. He’s Mattie’s agent, but he hates Rick cause he used to be his agent too before Rick upgraded to Bill Pappas. 

Bill Pappas is in this game too, but you never really meet him. In the same way you never met the Janitor in Secrets Can Kill… suspicious. Although I don’t know what you would want to kill your own talent. 

Sleuthing around (and getting hit on by Rick non-stop) you discover that the light was sabotaged and that everyone technically has a motive to want to kill the guy. Someone tries to MURDER him again, by putting a bomb in his dressing room that Thug Nan finds and disarms because apparently she’s been trained in this?

ALSO the order to cut the wires in is found in Mattie’s dressing room, determined by highlighter and juice stains. It wasn’t hard to figure out, but it was very flash escape room-y. But my girl would NEVER, so idk what was up with that. 

So after disarming the bomb, we’re able to break into the studio...

at niiiight. 

Going through everyone’s shit and breaking all kinds of trespassing laws, we learn that:

Lillian probs sent Rick the nasty chocolate and she has serious anger management issues. She’s also trying to get his ass fired. 

Someone be running around by the name of Owen W Spader, and sabotaging all kinds of shit. He’s represented by Dwayne also.

The tape used in the bomb tape recorder was probably recorded somewhere in New York. Idk why we had to do this part but whatever.

So we go to Dwayne’s Office at niiightt. We break in using a card like we have most of the game, and low key I’m salt that this doesn’t work in all the games. In the office we look up Owen’s file, and there is no picture. We snoop through Dwayne’s shit, and learn that my sweet Mattie loaned this fool 5k. There’s also a bunch of bills and eviction notices everywhere, along with a ticket to Rio. This is not looking good for dear old Dwayne. 

You go home and now there’s a threat for you. Oh shit you’ve pissed someone off. Yikes. In the morning, you ask everyone if they’ve met Owen. Mattie’s like Owen? Who is she? Rick pretends to know him and proceeds to hit on Thug Nan, I mean she did save his life or whatever. Mildred doesn’t know him either but boy does he borrow shit from the prop room. Lillian yells at you about how no one cares and tells you to go die in a ditch. 

So you go home again, only to have Lilian booty call your ass back to the studio…. At niiight. When you get there she’s like I got a death threat too, but who could be behind this. And Thug Nan is like “Here Lillian, let me Tom Riddle Owen W Spayder’s name for you, ohh would you look at that? DWAYNE POWERS HAS THE EXACT SAME LETTERS IN HIS NAME. I can’t believe you needed a teenager to tell you that but you’re welcome.” 

Dwayne obviously read Chamber of Secrets, cause he decides to show up and give his evil monologue all dramatically. He mentions that he only planned to murder Lillian (y tho? I hate her too, but she’s not the smartest person around, she literally would have never figured out that it was Dwayne, but okay). Since Nancy’s nosy ass was there however, she gonna get murdered by default. 

Lillian just stands there for some reason, even tho it’s one vs. two and I’m sure if we tag teamed this we could take him. Thug Nan carries this entire team and saves the day by opening the door and letting security tackle Dwayne. She did all the work for them, but allegedly they were on to him. Sure you were Randy. 

THE END. 

[thugnan]

Danger on Deception Island (PC 2003)

Story: 5/10

Characters: 5/10

Puzzles: 4/10

Chores: 6/10

Final Rating: 5/10

This game wasn’t memorable for me but I don’t have any complaints about it. There aren’t any unnecessary puzzles, and it isn’t information heavy (although the plot is education driven imo). The characters I didn’t find particularly engaging but I didn’t find them annoying either. Perhaps I wasn’t excited about it because I played The Creature of Kapu Cave, Ransom of the Seven Ships and Phantom of Venice first which were also sea based plots. I did die a lot in this game because apparently safety was v important.

Plot (spoilers obviously):

Thug Nan heads to Washington for a whale watching vacation. But we all know how these vacations tend to go, you don’t even get the chance to start it before George’s friend get’s her whale boat ransacked.

Upon further sleuthing you learn that this is not a one time thing, many people at Snake Horse Harbor have been victims of this boat part snatching thief. Considering Thug Nan can’t even look at whales now, we have no other option but to do a lil snooping.

You get your helmet and get biking, you meet:

Katie: George’s friend, not very chatty, some sort of marine biologist. She’s kinda cute, I think it’s the freckles but no thnx, I’m loyal to frank joy mattie Ned. She gives whale watching tours, but has major competition with another local Andy Jason.  Recently a whale came into the area and she’s all about protecting it.

Holt Scotto: Local fisherman old guy who is running for harbormaster, he’s salt about the whale and thinks it needs to gtfo so people can fish. Something something about the economy. He thinks Katie needs to stop shoving herself in everyone’s business.

Jenna: Owns the Hot Kettle Cafe, and no offense to this sad town, it’s the only thing that’s ‘happenin’ ‘round here. Her fam has lived here for generations, and she doesn’t seem to like Katie either. She believes that the orca should be reunited with its family.

Andy Jason: Owns the whale watching business that competes with Katie’s. His has a lil museum that I think is p cute. He’s been trying to get Katie to join him for a while now, but it’s because she has access to the whale, where he has to stay 500ft away from it at all times. I guess you could say that they’ve got beef.

As you explore, you find a bunch of bottles with notes in them. Jenna spills the tea on the ex harbormaster and his wife um… shoot what was her name… Hilda Swanson or something close to that. Apparently she went batshit when the harbormaster passed, and lives on some distant island, throwing shit into the ocean. I don’t think that is good for the ocean, but you do you.

I don’t know how this helps the main plot, but I ain't got nothing better to do since I can’t see any whales, I solve her cute little puzzles, this old lady is probably just bored. At some point tho you need some gift that Hilda gave everyone on this island. Altho idk she must not like Katie either because only Andy, Holt and Jenna got a gift.

Because this is a Nancy Drew game, they make you run a bunch of errands before they can let you in on that. Getting your hands on Andy’s is a little tough because you gotta go thru his museum bs, and take his dumb tour to get the complimentary keychain in order to figure out his letters. He also tries to rip me off which just doesn’t sit well with Thug Nan. Thug Nan will remember this.

When you a clammin for Jenna’s task, she gets robbed. Which is like what okay that’s not a boat? U naturally take a gander, and using the information you hustled out of 1-800-askalibrarian and Dr. assistantdirectoroftheNATIONALWOODLIBRARY (wtf),  you finddddddd A SECRET TUNNEL.

Down there you find that it connects to a lot of different stores, the lighthouse, and the sea caves. That’s dope I guess, you find some oil down there, which is great cause that means I can use the morse code thing to send Hilda my phone number so she can call me.

Hilda is allegedly not batshit, there’s apparently a method to her madness? Thug Nan: *doubt* She makes you run around solving poems and she’s vague as faq. I got really annoyed at one so I just looked it up. I’m sorry Hilda but also I’m not sorry.

Somehow this begins to tie back to the boat robber thing, so I’m glad we went on her loony scavenger hunt, because we had absolutely no leads. As I get closer to figuring out the culprit, I get the impression that Hilda knows exactly who the culprit is. B I T C H I ain’t got time to be playing scooby doo, these people are literally about to escape. CALL THE POLICE, CALL THE COAST GUARD, why you wasting time messing with a teenager Hilda??

Anyway Thug Nan has to do all the work around here, as per usual. You find a super secret hide out in the sea caves, where you find the Orca, and a bunch of stolen shit. I KNEW IT, IT WAS THE ORCA ALL ALONG. I kid, but it looks like someone has been training the Orca to steal shit from a shipwreck. Convoluted but ok. You find Katie’s gloves and you’re like “bitch u didn’t

You hightail back to Katie’s boat… and it’s gone. What a filthy ho. You go tattle on her to the townspeople, and apparently no one cares. Except Andy, bless his soul.

You sneak onto a suspect boat, and after much a sneaking you find Katie… tied up. Oh shit… and then you also find ANDY U CHEAPO BUTTFACE LIAR. He’s been a smuggling furs from the shipwreck. I don’t know how old this shipwreck is, but would fur really be okay being underwater for so long?

Well Andy, remember when I told u that I would remember? Well u bet ur butt I remember. I KO dis b wit help of my handy dandy orca friend. And Holt shows up after all with the Coast Guard so I guess he’s not that bad.

Katie votes for Holt, and the military trained whale is released into the wild- wait WHAT? Isn’t that the opposite of what you want to do with whales that weren’t raised in the wild???

The End.