#to be understood

[pr0ceeding]

[wordsofabrokenbutmysticalfaerie]

The greatest love is for you to be understood your way just so they can love you better.

[evenlis]

You were the only gaze that I was myself in. The only gaze that didn't feel like an invasion. you looked to admire and understand, not to strip and possess like many others. For this, I am eternally grateful.

-Evenlis

[definegodliness]

Shh

For a fleeting Moment, I revert to The alienation of my youth; Craving to be understood, If only by one single person.

It is a Thoughtless emotion, Recognized, and specified The same as before the days of having Outgrown and forgotten Such insignificant, guileless, Longings.

So, The inner child Grasps at straws in my bosom, As if clutching frayed sinews, Until he feels he will no longer spark Any curiosity.

He is known, And has long since been determined Irrelevant.

Once more, Almost palpably, He sinks to my stomach.

I let him.

Then, I nourish myself with Defeatism, So that I do not waste the reality That has been Granted to me.

--- 19-11-2025, M.A. Tempels ©

[cherribet]

You've mentioned it a few times that you have another account where you draw for general audience. Are you uncomfortable with sharing it here? Would you like to stay unknown?

yeah I have one, it has existed longer than this one since I also draw from other fandoms so it has accumulated a much wider range of audience from different ages, I still draw dark horror themes there from time to time BUT what I will not draw there is games or contents that are clearly marked as (+18)

I do not like the idea of exposing young audiences there with these, cause if they consume these type of media very openly online,they will eventually interact with the target audience that was catered to it which are adults.(And that is A NO NO for me, we are all basically strangers online,there are many ways that could go wrong here, and I will be honest I’m uncomfortable seeing online in comments like “I want/wish this to happen to me ect, ect,(dark/explicit)” then in bio it’s written age 16, which is just NO)

I know this is not entirely a full proof solution, BUT I still want the separation regardless, cause on my end I want to explore more darker themes without worrying to filter myself out to those that are easily impressionable to such media.

so to answer your question anon, Yes I would like to stay unknown from both accounts, I can’t really control if some finds out eventually, but if such situation happen, please don’t go out of the way and say “hey your *artist* from this *artist* account!” cause of course anyone who will see it WILL look it up.

[crucifiedhereticprincess]

i just want to be seen, not demeaned or made obscene. understood, not reduced or endlessly misconstrued. held, not compelled to rebuild what somebody else killed. loved, not judged by every wound i ever spoke of.

i am tired of the yelling and swelling of panic compelling compliance. tired of profanities thrown casually while i carried the casualties silently. tired of shrinking and thinking and linking my worth to whatever version of me caused the least friction.

i am tired of being called dumb when i spent years becoming someone strong enough to overcome. tired of being called a whore by people who never wore the weight of the wars i survived before. tired of carrying accusations as decoration while my devastation became somebody else’s justification.

after a while the insults stop sounding brutal and start sounding habitual. the ridicule becomes ritual. the cruelty becomes communal.

and you start adjusting. editing. compressing. suppressing. second guessing every sentence before it leaves your lips. rehearsing every conversation before it exists. questioning whether your sadness is sadness or just another inconvenience.

until one day you look in the mirror and realize you have spent years trying to become easier to love for people who were committed to misunderstanding you.

and if you have never sat trembling while somebody convinced you your suffering was forgettable, if you have never spent years becoming smaller and quieter and lighter just to make yourself more lovable, then you do not get to tell me how i should feel.

because i remember every collision. every contradiction. every humiliation. every condition attached to affection.

and beneath all of it, beneath the exhaustion and erosion, the grief and depletion,

there is still a part of me asking for something beautifully ordinary.

to be seen. to be understood. to be held. to be loved.

[abby086]

Sometimes I feel as though I am floating through life as a ghost, unseen to everybody else, and all I crave is to be seen.