#too angst

[blue-cat-shitposts]

I’m sick of posts that go “Oh when people quote Slime’s final words they only include the ‘Thank you for teaching me what it’s like to be human’ part and forget about ‘Maybe I almost was’ and it’s a shame” look some of us didn’t hear it over the sobbing okay

[ghostie-galaxi]

TOO/TO1 Masterlist

TO1 playing with your hands/you play with their hands

TO1 when you fall asleep on their shoulder

TO1 when someone makes their S/O cry

TO1 waking their S/O up in the morning

TO1 how they cheer you up when you're sad

Supernatural AU: TO1 as Supernatural Beings

Supernatural AU: TO1 when they fall for a human

[moondustaeil]

⋅ ɢᴇɴʀᴇ : established relationship : angst , fluff , jealousy

⋅ ᴄʜᴀʀᴀᴄᴛᴇʀꜱ : Chan x reader

⋅ ᴡᴏʀᴅ ᴄᴏᴜɴᴛ : 1.1k

"Why are you always with Jeyou?"

It's the kind of question that insinuates that you're the one to receive the blame. You don't even need to hear your own words, or a direct accusation to understand that he's blaming you for something. Though you only receive half of the blame, the other half is now resting in Kim Jeyou's unworn shoes.

"Me?" You ask as you point at yourself. There is no one else that he could direct the words to. Six beds against the wall but no one around you, especially not Jeyou who coincidentally resides in one of the upper bunks.

In response to your incomprehension, Chan hums. It's not the sweet hum that could resemble a song, it's the short and strict hum that answers a bold "yes," to your question. The wordless response leaves you even more confused. But Chan isn't willing to connect the dots for you, you could figure it out on your own.

"Me?" You ask again, though it's just a pause so that you can briefly remember the previous hint Chan gave you. "Always being with Jeyou?" You finally finish the question.

And just like last time, Chan doesn't use words to give you an answer. It's a question that shouldn't even be asked, how can you not be aware of your actions? Whenever you're around at the dorms, it seems like you come for Jeyou rather than for him. Sometimes the two of you are in front of the tv, other times you help him monitor his performance, and there was even one time when the two of you went out for dinner.

The first few times, he thought it might be because you felt closest to him rather than other members. But those thoughts had transitioned when he came to find out you shared your midnight snack with Jeyou whilst he wasn't home. Something that Jerome had told him about accidentally in a ramble of how good the night had been! Eventually, it turned into jealousy: jealousy of the way you acted towards his younger member and perhaps of the amount of time you spent together.

"I don't always spend time with Jeyou." You calmly protest against Chan's silence, he didn't seem to budge at all after your question which leaves you to lead the conversation. But before you're able to explain yourself and your - apparently wrong - actions, Chan interrupts.

"You do! It's always Jeyou! And where am I, your boyfriend, Cho Chanhyuk?!"

His words are said loudly, his long lost feelings coming out in the form of a snap. You weren't even sure if he was capable of that as most arguments were calm with mutual understanding and respect. Something that now seems far from the case, and it disappoints you. Not to forget how you're disappointed because of his assumptions.

"You know why?" You calmly say but the high tone of your voice already gives away the underlying feelings. You want to be calm but as he loses his temper, you unconsciously start feeling the same way. "Because you're never home. You're always at the studio with Chihoon. So I come here to wait for you, but I hang around with the others because I'm bored. And Jeyou is just a good friend!"

After your short outburst, it gets quiet, neither of you says something. You can only hear your own breathing as you come down from the high, not the pleasured high, but the peak of your frustration. Chan is staring at you, and you know, even if you decided to break eye-contact.

"Is that an excuse?" The audacity. Chan even dares to ask that question whilst knowing that you're not the one to blame. "I go there to work on my music!" he says. If those first words asked you if you were making excuses, then he surely is by the time his mouth opens again. Working on music might be a good excuse, but that doesn't take away that it's still an excuse.

"Working on music is an excuse, Chanhyuk." You clarify. The sigh that leaves your lips is one out of disbelief and even Chan can notice the particles of negative emotions that now float in the air.

An excuse. The words linger towards Chan's mind and he can't help but realise the things that you're saying. Not only is working on music an excuse, but his entire existence as your boyfriend is also an excuse. From his jealousy, to never being home when you are around: excuses.

"You're right," Chan says after a few seconds of quietness. Though his mind was far from quiet during those seconds: all he could think of was him making endless excuses and making you feel like it was you who made them up. "I'm sorry for blaming you," his words are quiet but they get slightly louder as he approaches you. His hands reach out for yours the moment he is close enough, and you allow him to take them in his.

First, he couldn't stop blaming you, and now the apologies continue to fall from his lips. The second "I'm sorry," easily slips past his lips. And above underneath the grey-lavender coloured bangs, you can see his expressive brown eyes. It almost appears like he's apologising with them, showing you his compassion.

Chan tugs at both of your hands gently, pulling them until you have no other option but to wrap your arms around him before you fall. Within seconds, his arms engulf you tightly.

"I'll spend more time with you and I'll even take you to the studio. I promise I'll try to spend more time with you, starting today." He promises. He shifts his gaze to the right height to find your eyes, looking into them as soon as he finds them. He's careful, waiting until your reaction shows, he doesn't want to say anything wrong and have things take the worst turn again.

You believe him and it shows. Your eyes lighten up at the words, mostly because you're relieved that you don't misunderstand or blame each other. "And when you come home, I'll make sure to spend more time with you too." You say. Perhaps there was a bit of truth in Chan's words, you had been around Jeyou even when Chan was just in the room writing lyrics. Both of you made mistakes and, in the future, still would.

"It's all okay again," Chan whispers as he rests his forehead against yours, finding comfort in the embrace you share and the genuine words. You hum in response, the kind of hum of relief and perhaps even put of adoration. "I love you," he says to you.

As your foreheads separate, your lips connect in a kiss. A kiss out of love that you gladly share. His lips move slowly against yours, putting in all of the love the two of you had been missing out on for the past time.

"I love you too," you whisper in response, his lips curling up into a smile as he feels your heart on your lips as you say the words.

[babysubinnie]

my thoughts // cho chanhyuk

🎾  pairing:: cho chanhyuk (chan) x reader 🎾  genre:: angst, fluff (slightly) 🎾  summary:: soulmate!chan,, one day you wake up with a guy’s thoughts, you guys have never met, neither of you have social media to find each other, with only his voice to find your soulmate.

part 2

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i remember the day that i woke up with a splitting headache and some guy’s thoughts in my head. his voice was nice, but damn he thought a lot. i know that at some point this would happen to my soulmate and i. but i didn’t know it would happen so early. 

“i should talk to chihoon about a new collab song.” who’s chihoon? what song? he’s a singer? i took a deep breath because i wanted to say something too. but his thoughts were over taking mine.

“yo! will you stop thinking for a second? i can’t think because of you.” i rolled my eyes walking down the stairs to drink some cold water. he had so many ideas and they never stopped.

“who are you?” his voice. i will never shut up about my soulmate’s voice. i mean his thoughts were loud, but he has the best voice. i could shut my thoughts ip forever just to listen to him. yeah yeah, privacy and all but those privacy boundaries were all gone when we were born in this generation.

“i guess your soulmate?” i giggled then pulled out my phone scrolling through my my instagram. i wanted to know everything about him. so of course for the next few days, we just talked everyday. we got to know each other through our thoughts, and i loved it. he was so sweet. 

“y/n! have you found your soulmate? nevermind. have you heard this song?” my best friend grabbed my hand to sit down. she then put her airpod into my ear giggling. this voice, was really familiar. i pulled the airpod out of my ear then snapped my head over to my best friend. 

“who’s the artist that sang this?” i panted then i grabbed her phone looking at the artist. chan. chan? i stood up and told her that i would be back, then ran around the corner to hide. 

“what’s your name? i realized i never asked.” i looked down at my feet while thinking it to myself, hopefully he wasn’t busy. i smiled when i heard his chuckle. goddamn.

“hey to you too princess. i can’t talk for very long but it’s chan.” his laugh. was i in love with him? yeah probably. wait stop i can’t think like this. 

“why? are you busy?” i kinda hoped that he wasn’t busy, i wanted to talk to him, not because i had no friends but i was having a bad day. i just wanted to hear his voice. 

“i’m going to film something now i’ll talk to you later?” the second his thought finished, i started pouting then ran to the change room. i changed into shorts and sports bra, then taped my hands with boxing tape. i put my gloves on walked into the gym. i hit the punching bag a thousand times even i lost count. while i was going off at the punching bag, he kept thinking of cute things like oh she’s so cute or something totally unrelated.

“fucking asshole.”  i kept punching and repeating that in my head. over and over again. i don’t know why i was so pissed off. it’s not like we were dating. i haven’t even seen him. 

“y/n, you know that i can hear you right?” i rolled my eyes sitting down on the floor. i took my boxing gloves off then untaped my hands. as i sat there zoning out, no thoughts at all. then i got interrupted.  

“guess what!! i got tickets to TOO’s showcase!” my best friend sat next to me and shoved her phone into my face showing me the tickets. i grabbed her hand pulling it away so i could read it. i told her i’d go with her only if she bought me albums. so of course, a day before the show, we went to the store and she bought me a stack of albums. 

————————

we got front row seats and i was already so tired. chan and i haven’t talked in a while because we were both in our own thoughts. he was really nervous but i didn’t have the energy to talk to him. when the show had started, there was a really cute guy on the stage. 

“damn.” there was only one guy that stood out to me. he had silver hair, and a tattoo on his right arm, he was so fine. when i made eye contact with him he smirked. i smirked back at him then turned to face my best friend.

“what? did you see a really fine guy or something?” chan’s voice finally spoke to me after a long time. i laughed and said yes to him before staring at the fine ass guy in front of me.

“fair enough, i see a really fine girl in front of me right now.” he laughed in his head and i replied laughing looking down. i was kinda sad about it but at the same time, i didn’t even know where my soulmate was. 

“chan do you want to introduce yourself first?” the mc said and i turned to look at the mc, then turned to look at the boys to see who was going to speak first. chan? isn’t that my soulmate’s name? but there’s a thousand of chan’s. bang chan, heo chan, and kang yuchan. but my soulmate won’t be an idol right?

“hey i’m chan!” 

holy. shit. 

[key201303]

TOO.

[stormyfur]

is clear sky going to be this whiny for the entire series lol

[babysubinnie]

world klass fuckboy pt.2 // song donggeon - requested

🎾  pairing:: song donggeon x reader 🎾  genre:: fluff, angst? 🎾  summary:: rich boy!donggeon is known for being able to get into a girl’s heart but also the way out. he knew exactly what he was doing, but when he’s supposed to be your fiance? that’s something you really don’t want to get into.

——————————————————————————

“i don’t have one so stop looking. but i know you had one. where’d your model date go?” i laughed and crossed my arms. i looked over his shoulder and my parents as well as his parents were looking over at us. i scoffed telling donggeon to turn around. he rolled his eyes stepping forward to whisper in my ear.

“what if we played around with our parents? who knows, you could actually end up falling for me.” he laughed but i rolled my eyes telling myself that it was physically impossible to fall for this asshole but if you looked at him, he was very boyfriend material. no, wrong. he was flawless. 

“donggeon, don’t even-” 

“don’t even think about it? no baby, i can’t do that. apparently all i think about is you. ever since that day in the cafeteria, all I can think about is you. i want to stop thinking about you but there's nothing I can do about it. no matter what model i go out with, you're the only fucking thing that i think about. i'm not supposed to be like this. i don’t do love. everyone knows this but every time i see you all i want to do is hug you, kiss you, and do everything in the world with you. what the hell are you doing to me?” he was inches away from me now from moving inch by inch each time he spoke. the last sentence was spoken right into my ear, giving me chills.

“what the fuck are you on about? donggeon i get that you hate your parents but you don’t have to pretend to be in love with me.” i laughed pushing him away from me to walk over to minsu who was trying to take his cookies back from jisu who had stolen it. I put my arm around jisu and took the cookies back for minsu.

“thank you noona.” he giggled and as i watched him giggle i turned around to look at donggeon. i thought to myself as i looked at him, why does he actually seem pissed off? before i knew it, another two girls were clinging off his arm. but instead of the normal flirting donggeon, he told them to get lost. he did this for the rest of the night. the entire party he was rejecting girls left and right. but not in a nice gentlemanly way, in a scary pissed off voice.

“if one more girl goes up to him he’s going to blow up. y/n you better do something. now.” jeyou laughed and shrugged his shoulders. he knew donggeon like the back of his hand, i mean they were best friends for a reason.

“why me?” i scoffed taking another sip of the champagne. i looked down at the glass which gained a glare from jeyou. he was basically swearing at me with his eyes. i nodded rolling my eyes when i saw that there was more than two girls around him now. i walked over pushing through each girl glaring up at him. he took a deep breath in, almost like a sigh of relief? he wrapped his arm around my waist leaning down to kiss the top of my head. i looked up at him now smiling before turning my head to glare at the many girls surrounding the two of us. 

he pulled my waist so that i was now in front of him while he leaned up against the bar. i giggled putting my arms around his shoulders, getting thousands of scoffs behind me. i shrugged at them then turned back to face donggeon. i might as well get him out of this situation. 

“hi princess, perfect timing. i thought you were never going to come over and kiss me.” he pouted and leaned in so that our lips were basically touching. i laughed turning my head to see that all of them were in shock. they had nothing to say. i rolled my eyes placing my lips inches away from his again. 

“you looked too good for me not to come and kiss you.” i finally pressed my lips to his, and i’m going to be honest, the rumors about his kissing? all true. all he did was kiss me but it wasn’t even a big one, and it knocked all the air out of me. 

“says you. i wanted to go over there and kiss you in front of your parents you looked so good.” he pulled away from the kiss only to kiss me again. i smiled through my teeth while whispering, 

“kiss me again and i’ll throw you out this window.” i pulled him into a hug whispering into his ear. he laughed pressing a kiss to my neck before turning me around to face his “fans”. 

“sorry girls, duty calls.” he winked at them before releasing his arms around my waist to take my hand. he took me outside the ballroom, to the darkest corner of the hallway before pressing me up against the wall. 

“so i’m guessing the plan to mess with our parents is a go then.”

“just because i helped you doesn’t mean that suddenly i’m going to accept the fact that you’re my fiance. i will only agree to this if you try. what do i mean by try? think about it.” i shrugged pushing him away from me to walk to the other side of the hallway to face him. he stood there with his mouth wide open and hesitated before smiling at me. 

“i won’t go out with any other girls. i promise i will try my utmost best to protect you and love you until death do us part okay?” he smiled genuinely as he walked over to me taking both of my hands into his. 

“we may be getting married in the future but we’re not getting married at this second dipshit.”

[moondustaeil]

⋅ ɢᴇɴʀᴇ : soulmate au : fluff

⋅ ᴄʜᴀʀᴀᴄᴛᴇʀꜱ : chihoon x reader

⋅ ᴡᴏʀᴅ ᴄᴏᴜɴᴛ : 1.2k

Achromatopsia.

The term used to describe a complete lack of colour, the hard synonym for a much simpler word, colourblindness. In the medical world, they call it a syndrome, sometimes even a symptom that might exhibit up to five different conditions. With one out of 30,000 newborns being born with achromatopsia, you and your soulmate belong somewhere in that prevalence.

As far as you've been told, there are two sorts of achromatopsia. In the first sort, some still see limited colours. In the second sort, only shades can be perceived. You and your soulmate belong to the latter category, in which only black, white, and grey shades can be perceived. No colours, only shades.

It might sound like you know a lot about achromatopsia and a lot about your soulmate. Though none of the knowledge in your mind has been provided by a professional or formal literature. You took it upon yourself to make use of the internet and search for meanings: the meaning behind your monochrome vision, the meaning behind the unknown person your soul longed for. Despite the endless websites telling you somewhat similar things, you didn't live up to them. Connect the dots from achromatopsia and soulmates and you come to your own conclusion: your syndrome would be healed once you look into the eyes of your soulmate.

Despite knowing of the existence of your soulmate and knowing he's the only person that can cure your achromatopsia, you distance yourself from it. You don't actively look for him like other people would, you don't give in to the ache in your heart. Rather than looking for your soulmate: you wander around the streets and wonder whether other people are achromats like you. You might not be able to see it in their eyes, but it doesn't stop you from observing them.

Why don't you look for your soulmate? Because you fear the moment you will see colours for the first time and realise that the world is much better with simple greyish shades. It's a white lie you've told yourself so many times that you stopped seeing it as a lie. Hidden from yourself is the fear that you will never find your soulmate if you actively look for him.

Today isn't any different from the days where you observe strangers on the street. Even though you had a day off and wanted nothing but to spend it inside your apartment with a good unfinished series, you are obligated to go outside. Due to the empty fridge in your kitchen, you find yourself lurking over the streets, headed to the nearest convenience store.

You wouldn't mind skipping breakfast, but even that doesn't mean that you don't have to leave your house. You need to have three meals a day and your fridge doesn't even hold enough ingredients for one, so it's obvious that you have to drag yourself to the store first thing in the morning. That's how you end up on the street as early as nine in the morning: too early for crowded streets, too late to avoid other humans.

Your eyes scan over the outside world, staring ahead but still seeing the many aspects of the city: the black shaded street that you walk on and the grey buildings that line up ahead of you. A coffee shop to your left and a flower shop on your right: you don't see the beige interior of the coffee shop, neither do you see the pink coloured flower bouquets. Everything is grey, devoid of colours.

Halted feet now stand in the middle of the street as an old couple greets you good morning. If you assign a colour to their friendly smiles: it would be yellow like the rays of the morning sun. A yellow you never experienced but as you greet one another, you feel the warmth of the sun on your shoulders. "Have a nice day," you say politely as an end to the conversation.

Your halted feet stop their alignment when you take a step forward to continue your path towards the store, though your eyes don't move along just yet, they are still following the old and probably soulmate-labelled couple.

Interference. Your shoulder bumps against someone else's body after merely one more step forward. Your head is fast to turn but the rest of your body is still in shock because of the collision. Before either of you can fall, you grasp for one another's arm even though there had been no risk of falling.

"I'm so sorry!" You apologise quickly, standing up straight after all physical contact is broken between the two of you. You're now eyeball to eyeball with the stranger, though both of you are looking down at the street, the alignment of your feet.

The stranger coughs awkwardly, mumbling a response. "It's fine, I should have looked where I was going. Are you okay?" He asks you. His voice is deep and yet, it's unlike all of the other deep voices you heard before. Due to answer-demanding question, you raise your head to look at the stranger.

Eyeball to eyeball. You gaze into his dark brown eyes with your own, the pigmented colour hues apart from the black you usually see. The skin around his eyes isn't any type of grey: it's one of the many skin tones that exist in the pigmented world.

"I…," you don't come further than that with your words: not because you suddenly aren't so okay anymore, but because you are speechless. Your eyes start to dart over every possible inch of his face: the soft colour of his lips, his light blonde hair that nicely contrasts with the bright red beret he's wearing on top of that hair.

Without looking for his eyes, yours meet his. "I can see colours," he announces to you, his eyes now fixated onto yours even though he wishes to discover every colour that you have to offer him. "Me too," you say in response. The endless colour palette is inked onto him: almost like what you expect a rainbow to be, but with even more colours.

"My name is Chihoon."

His name alone makes you smile even though you're no longer able to assign a colour to him, he's the entire palette of colours that is imprinted on your head in grey shades. He's the blue of the grey sky you saw, the gold of the grey necklace around your neck. He's each of the ten million colours that exist.

"I'm y/n," you tell him. Your name makes a smile coat his plump lips, his heart no longer coloured in a dark grey shade, but in the red that could resemble a love, he never experienced before. You look like the most beautiful painted canvas, inked in colours he's yet to discover.

Chihoon reaches out his hand to yours, the touch as soft as the beige sand of the beach. Your fingers intertwine with his and gently clasp over the top of his hand just like his fingers curl between your knuckles. The monochrome one-person portrait in your apartment would transition into the beautifully coloured picture of you and your soulmate.

"Colour will always change your perspective, just as love will always change your life around."

💌 send me a member (nct/tbz/too) + an au/genre and I'll write you a drabble or some soft hours