#trans at work

[transmangains]

One of my managers at work keeps misgendering me and on Saturday she made an announcement to the entire store and misgendered me in that announcement. I talked to her afterwards and told her to stop misgendering me and that if it happens again, I’m going to contact hr. She was apologetic but she acted like she had no idea what I was talking about and said “I always try to make a point to say he”- she only genders me correctly about half of the time

[transadvicecolumn]

Q: How do I figure out if a work place is trans-inclusive during the interview stage? I am a new grad and I want to know things like "will m

[name-and-pronoun-validation]

Positive stuff!

Hey everyone! It has been quite a while since I posted here but I just wanted to let you all know I’m doing okay and I really appreciate all the kind words you have said to me.

I just started back at my job this week and I wanted to share some positive trans-related experiences I had at work. I met a trans coworker in the bathroom who complimented my hair and said I don’t seem cis. I’m happy that other trans people can pick up on that. We talked for a minute and it was like my favorite bathroom conversation ever. I also put a they/them pronoun pin on my work shirt which I hope makes trans customers feel seen and comfortable. At work, I’m in a position where I sometimes need to confirm people’s names and date of birth, and I often avoid using first names, especially when it seems like the first name on file could be the person’s deadname. I have the power to not deadname customers! This makes me really happy as someone who has been deadnamed a lot when going for appointments and stuff. Lastly, I have been finding it kind of difficult to speak up and correct coworkers about my pronouns, but one of my coworkers actually apologized for using gendered language for me, and is really making an effort to not do it.

Things are still harder for me than if I were healthy and abled, but these instances made me happy and I hope they bring you some joy too.

[0838102]

Guess who did a closing shift in a DRESS??!

*pauses for dramatic effect*

THIS ENBY!

Fuck yeah, I totally felt like I was going to die for like the first 2 hours but I did it!

It’s a sleeveless black dress that shows off my wavy haired arms beautifully. Plus, I got a cute pair of off white socks with light orangy yellow lining and a sketch of a bee on them.

You do NOT wanna know how many people I told that I was THE bee’s knees.

Also, customers.

And anyone who’d listen.

Speaking of people! Two of the guys just were like “your showing arms!”

And I’m not sure how to respond to that. Like yes? I usually don’t wear sleeveless but like... how does one even react? I knew they were chill, just odd.

The women of my department were mixture of “so cute” and “you’re gonna freeze.” Which like, honestly? Don’t they know me? I’m always starting a shift in a t-shirt. Like... c’mon guys, I’m durable.

I did have to put on a stupid polo shirt underneath when my supervisor came in. 🙄 God forbid a customer sees my drop dead gorgeous arms. Like fuckin’ hell, old white dudes should just stop writing any dress codes once they get over the age of 30. Geez!

I actually relaxed alot after that. Partly because part of my most prominent body hair was covered (easy to clock me) but also I didn’t know how worried I was about my supervisor seeing me. It was like a huge ass weight off my shoulders. I had a change of clothing in case I had to take it off. I read through the dress code manual 5 times. I knew I was within regulations (forgot the shoulders) but still!

Bathrooms were terrifying but nobody was in the men’s so like... it was less bad than I originally thought. Actually, only saw one other fella in the bathroom.

I did get two customers clearly give me the full once over, head-to-toe. Like.... man... I can see your frickin’ eyes. I know what your doing. Ugh!!! It made me so uncomfortable. Besides that, everyone was super nice. I got some compliments from customers and my comrades. I’m definitely doing it again.

The rest of the day was easier. It was hard getting used to how much I could bend. Next time, dress or skirt, I’d prefer it a couple inches longer tbh.

Another

[transmanconfessions]

( OP shared an update to this post: https://transmanconfessions.tumblr.com/post/620430372047667201/can-i-vent-a-little-in-my-job-description-it )

Oh wow this was like a year ago lol. I still think about it sometimes and I'm still a bit miffed over it, but he didn't do anything like this again before I moved, or at least not to me and my coworker. I did avoid him as much as I could tho lmao.

I do have another story tho. I work with the same company, but in a different position at a different location with a completely different job description. (I still have to be able to lift, but that's not relevant here lol) ANYWAY this happened soon after I changed positions. I don't bind to work because long work days and I'm more paranoid about my health than I am dysphoric. Which is saying something, bc I'm hella dysphoric.

I have a rather large chest, and one of my new coworkers, who at that point I'd only known for maybe a week, would not stop misgendering me. When I finally got up the nerve to correct her, she brought up my chest. Literally said "You have boobs" and walked away. I'm happy to say I was actually the last person there to say something to the manager - I'm night shift, he's day. Everyone else who was there told him immediately, and I waited until the next day when I saw him - in person. He had already submitted the case to HR before I had talked to him about it. Love him, he's great.

Now the sucky thing is, she had the highest numbers. Our work has deadlines, and we can't push some of them back without hella repercussions. This was one of those jobs. We needed her so we could get it done. So I just avoided her, didn't say a word to her.

During that time, we hired a temp. The boss gave the temp to me to train bc I've shown that I know what I'm doing. Bitch coworker decided she didn't like that. She'd been working there fourteen years, and here I was, a green newbie, not even there two months, training a temp.

I remember saying something like "It's okay if you miss some, your partner can fix it--" and bitch coworker interrupted and took the temp to her area, loudly proclaiming "She doesn't know what she's doing". By "she", she meant me.

The rest of my sentence was going to be "-for now, but when you get comfortable with the software, you'll have to fix it yourself." But that's besides the point. I was mad about that, yeah, but I was even more pissed that bitch coworker was back on her shit. So I talked to the boss again and we decided it would be best to put me on day shift until HR did its thing.

I was on day shift for a couple weeks, bitch coworker was let go, and when I went back to night shift, /everyone/ told me that bitch ex-coworker had been talking shit about me behind my back since the second she met me.

So yeah that's the story, I'm over it now bc it's taken care of and my boss has proven he's A+++++ but that was probably one of the shittiest months I have ever had lmao

[neutrois]

During my transition, I have lived as both completely out and (as much as possible) completely stealth. Right now, I’m somewhere in-between.

[queercapwriting]

okay trans and enby lovelies,

I’ve got three stories in the works for Bustle:

how do you come out as trans or nonbinary to your healthcare provider?

do you have to come out as trans or nonbinary at work?

how do you navigate traveling while trans?

slide into my DMs (wow i am such a dad) if you’d like to be interviewed (you can definitely always be anonymous)!