(Bayverse) Optimus Prime x Reader Headcanons (Non-Gender Specific)
TW: Language.
He doesn't really understand these celebrations, he believes they should have a meaning.. but they never really seem to. At least.. the popular ones don't. Though when you explained it, he realized that perhaps it's just an excuse to let go of life's stresses and to just.. be. An excuse to enjoy yourself, now that he can understand. He'll be honored to partake in your bucket list, if you would have him.. he'd love a break. He's up for pretty much anything you have planned, just nothing too extreme.. alright? Crazy little guy.
..Christmas movies? Yeah, he'd love to take a day just to watch movies with you. And my god, does he enjoy it. You two bundle up together in a nest built of nothing but dozens of blankets and pillows and watch some of the real classics, A Charlie Brown Christmas, Frosty the Snowman, Elf, all the good ones. He has an absolute blast just resting by your side, partaking in some human culture, it's a memory he will forever cherish. And if you offer to have another one soon, he certainly won't deny you.
If you go ice skating expect to be taken to a very frozen over pond where he will be hovering over you protectivly the entire time. And no, he's not using his holoform to skate with you.. he'd rather not, thank you. It's not his kind of hobby.
He won't go shopping with you during the holiday season, yet on the day of Christmas he will some how have presents so many for you.. He must have ordered them online or something. Good news is that he's an excellent gift giver, only getting things he's absolutely 100% sure you want and will love. He's not picky with gifts either, he'll be grateful for anything, even if it's something he can't exactly enjoy properly being his size. He'll be sure to give you some gifts through out the month of December too. At first, he was going to stock pile all of the gifts for Christmas.. but he keeps collecting too many, so he decided to just give them to you whenever he pleases... which is all the time, really.
He will drive about and let you see some of the really incredible Christmas decorations people have out in neighborhoods... but he won't go to any public events, obviously. That would be entirely too dangerous, both for you to be around him and for him. But he will go with you to a homeless shelter and help you donate some things for the winter season like some holiday food classics, sanitary products, and a few teen toys because people often overlook the older children and instead send in tons of young tot toys. He'd love to do that with you, in fact!
He needs snuggles during the winter, he needs them. He wants hugs and snuggles constantly, to the point he'll just randomly pick you up and hold you. You thought he was clingy before? You haven't seen nothing yet. He worries you're cold.. What if you're cold? He can't have you getting a cold.. which he is convinced is contracted by getting too cold when it is in fact not, it's a virus. You'd be more likely to contract something like pneumonia than a cold out there.. but maybe don't tell him that. That'd freak him out.
Speaking of you being cold, you're not going anywhere without a nice thick winter coat AT LEAST, bare minimal! He will advocate for you to wear a scarf, gloves, and some thick winter socks too, but he won't force you to put those on.. you are still your own person. However the winter coat is necessary, don't be irresponsible and go out there with nothing protective on because you're quote 'immune to the cold' or 'you're hot', be adult enough to realize that you're going to get cold eventually and being exposed to those blistering winds will lower your body's immune system. If you yourself are slowed by the temperature, so is your organs and system completely, logic. Don't make him start a rant, he will. Put the damn coat on. He's very serious about this, that he will force you to wear. If you ever wanted to make him hate you, that's the way to do it, being so inconsiderate that you don't even factor in the fact that others would most likely have to care for you if you did indeed get sick or being so very careless that it endangers yourself and others.. he despises that. He will never forgive anything like that.
He loves snowball fights, he just barely chunks one tiny little blob at you then he proceeds to absolutely deck his fellow Autobots with the biggest fucking hunk of snow he can possibly cook up, it's wild to watch. It makes Ironhide so damn mad because he's makes it a point to only throw them at him when he isn't ready, or else he'd just dodge it. The amount of slurs that fall from that old mech's lips would devastate even the most foul person.. it brings Optimus so much joy. But don't worry, he gets him back for it, he scares the shit out of Optimus by chunking it at him from around corners, now it's like a silent playful war between the two.
He loves to make little igloos for you to hang out in as well, anytime a snowball fight ensues he makes sure you have a little spot some where to watch from.
He made a tiny little snowman once and that's the only time he will probably ever do it. For some reason he felt the need to make the smallest little guy ever and make him so insanely detailed, he's so cute. You just came home one day and saw it in front of the entrance and when you asked who made it he very shyly admitted he did.. What a sweetheart!
He might decorate a few ornaments, but otherwise he's not a DIY sort of guy, he's more of a 'I'll watch and cheer you on' kind of man. He might occasionally make you a gift, but he tends to just get things he knows you like instead, it's too risky in his eyes to try to make something when he has absolutely no idea what he's doing and not only risk completely fucking it up, but also risk you not liking it which would dishearten him from ever trying again.. Not to mention, it would've been a massive waste of time. He's just gonna sip on his energon and help you by handing you things. You do your thing, he's proud of you!
Overall, not much changes around the base, just a few decorations are put up (For you, mostly.) and that's about it. You convinced Optimus to do a few holiday / wintery things, but he's just not that into Christmas, he's too busy handling and planning war things and you respect that about him.
But he does love the little get together you orchestrated, he loved the activities that he got to do with you, like the cookie making and the gingerbread house decorating, he's really glad you waited until the day of Christmas to do those things so you two had something to do together. But he's more of a spring kind of guy.. it's easier to move around unseen that way.
The plot follows Hot Rod as he learns the true meaning of Christmas.
The Autobots are celebrating Christmas together at their base on earth. Everyone is sat around Teletraan One watching Elf and sharing gifts.
Hot Rod proudly gifts Optimus Prime a mug with his own face on it that reads ‘Merry Christmas Optimus- I can’t wait to be Prime!!” which Optimus politely accepts and sets aside. He then opens Bumblees gift to him and is taken back to find he got him a massage chair! Optimus is so shocked and grateful, and Bumblebee is pleased he is so happy with the gift. Hot Rod rolls his eyes and opens his gift, which is from Grimlock and the Dinobots, and is just some socks.
Wheeljack and Ratchet then give Bumblebee their gift. He opens it to find they got him the Nintendo Switch 2. He hugs them both and thanks them. They tell him they saved up all their money for the past few months to get it for him, alongside presents for the Dinobots and he smiles, close to tears at hearing how much they thought of him.
Bumblebee then makes the noble decision to donate the Nintendo Switch 2 to the local children’s hospital. All the other Autobots applaud Bumblebee for his kind and selfless nature, Optimus Prime telling him how proud he is of him. Hot Rod is absolutely livid.
After the console has been donated, Hot Rod starts trying to fake having an illness, laying on the floor and claiming to have caught a ‘human child illness’ that can only be cured by taking him to the children’s hospital. Optimus reassures him that it’s nothing Ratchet can’t cure, which just makes Hot Rod even more frustrated and more adamant he’s sick, which no one believes.
Meanwhile, the Decepticons have travelled back to Cybertron to spend Christmas with Shockwave back at base and they’re all having a lovely traditional roast together around the table and listening to ‘Last Christmas’ by Wham on Soundwave.
Back on earth, Spike levelled up and became an adult and gave birth to Daniel via mitosis on Christmas Day, driving [no pun intended] the attention even further away from Hot Rod and fuelling his frustration even further. Desperate to get into the children’s hospital to play on the Nintendo Switch 2, he finds Daniel [now rapidly aged up to 12] and tries to provoke him to fake a serious illness.
On board with the plan, Daniel pretends to fall gravely ill, fooling everyone, Ratchet rushing him to the children’s hospital, Optimus, Bumblebee and Hot Rod close behind them.
Once they’re in, Daniel is checked over and found to be faking his illness, Hot Rod already gone to try and find the Nintendo Switch 2. He finds it in a small common room, a few kids gathered around a small TV smiling and having fun. He announces himself to them and tells them he’s next in line to be Prime so they should let him have a go. They look concerned and confused and not really sure what to do. He tells them he’ll take them all for a spin with no seatbelts if they let him have a go and they all look at each other, unsure.
Bumblebee then finds him trying to get a controller off one of the kids and intervenes, pulling Hot Rod away out of the room again. He asks why he’s doing all this and Hot Rod finally admits that he just wanted to play on the Nintendo Switch 2, and that he was a little jealous of Bumblebee. Bumblebee reassures Hot Rod that he should have just spoken up if he wanted a go, and he then finally gives Hot Rod his gift from him.
Bumblebee’s gift to Hot Rod turns out to be his very own PS4. Bumblebee explains that it used to be his but he doesn’t use it anymore and wanted to give it to him. Torn between trying to trade it with the hospital kids for the Nintendo Switch 2, Hot Rod is suddenly overcome with Christmas spirit and hugs Bumblebee, thanking him for the PS4, even though it’s ‘ancient’.
Optimus Prime tells both Daniel and Hot Rod the dangers and serious consequences of faking serious illness, neither of them taking it on board but apologising and saying they understand anyway. Optimus forgives them both and let’s them connect the PS4 into Teletraan One when they return back to base, not wanting to fully punish them on Christmas Day and he lets them have one hour of Fortnite. Their punishment lands the next day, Boxing Day, where they are both sent off to catch fish for everyone’s dinner that night- before the Decepticons attack of course.
