A New Missive (Vanderwood x Saeran)
This is the last chapter of my VandeRan series! I might write one-shots of this ship in the future if my energy is willing. Thank you so much for reading and your kind words. <3
The wooden walls were covered in photos and drawings. Arms, thighs, backs and chests proudly displaying their colorful or monochrome artworks, art forever embedded into their skin. Sketches of tattoos that may have yet to be drawn by a needle, but good enough for the artist to put them on display. Flowers and birds, skulls and animal prints, squares and circles, abstract to the point of madness or so realistic it might as well have been 3D printed. Every single tattoo more beautiful than that thing on his arm right now.
Saeran couldn’t sit still. His boot tapped the floor erratically and every second he scooted a little further off the chair until he teetered on the edge. A hand on his shoulder suddenly held him steady and his tapping stopped. To his right, Vanderwood, still standing, gave him a calm smile.
“It’s taking so long because she wants to give you the best tattoo possible,” the gentle giant said.
His gentle giant. Sometimes Saeran pinched himself mentally because he couldn’t believe it was real. For weeks he was able to call the taller man his boyfriend, and it was a word he had trouble uttering without becoming a blushy mess. Just like his face was already heating up from the way Vanderwood did his best to make him feel safe.
This had been his idea. The past was done, and he had survived. His body and mind were all his now. Mint Eye, Rika, no one, absolutely no one was allowed to control even the tiniest part of his body. In order to feel complete, in order to move on, he was going to burn the last bridge to the darkest part of his life. When he told Saeyoung, his brother actually started to cry and held him so tight he feared his ribs would break. For some reason, he had been waiting on a bad joke – just like the many of them he had heard when Saeyoung and MC found about him and Vanderwood – but the support of his brother helped him finalize this decision.
He rubbed the offending right arm, fingers tracing over the slight ridges in his skin that told him the tattoo was still there. He wore a tank top on purpose, but it made him feel horrible exposed. If it hadn’t been a long drive, he’d run home to cover himself in sweaters.
“What if she can’t cover it?” Saeran asked, anxiety laced in his voice. It was such a large, ugly black drawing. None of the drawings on the wall would be able to hide it, that was for sure.
Vanderwood grabbed a stool and sat down beside him, moving to wrap an arm around the redhead. “I’ve seen her cover much worse. I know her well, she’s very good at what she does.”
“Did she tattoo you?” Saeran couldn’t recall a single tattoo between the scars on his nude body, from the day he accidentally peeped on the former agent. Perhaps he had one somewhere properly hidden… Damn it me, this is not the time for those thoughts!
“No,” Vanderwood said so fast, Saeran raised his eyebrows. “Needles terrify me. But I know she’s helped some of my former friends, before we cut ties years ago.”
“Yes. Saeyoung would not stop making fun of me for months when he found out.” Vanderwood frowned as Saeran got a wobbly smile. “Don’t you start.”
Saeran chuckled. “Sorry, I won’t, it’s just that I didn’t expect it.” The big bad agent scared of needles. It was such endearing imagery. Vanderwood’s checks tinted pink and Saeran couldn’t help feel proud that he was the one to do that.
Settling more into his boyfriend’s arm, Saeran realized he knew so little of Vanderwood’s past. Now that there was time, now that Vanderwood visited more for him than just to be a ‘maid’, he wanted to know. He wanted to know everything, and he would answer any questions the former agent had for him as well.
While Saeran made his silent vow, the door opened to reveal a short-haired woman with tattoos covering every inch of her skin, excluding her face. For most Koreans she was odd, but here in her own space, he and Vanderwood were the odd ones out. The two of them separated as she approached.
With a big smile she held her sketchbook out, noticing their anticipation. “So! Thank you for waiting. I was really inspired by how you said you wanted to start over, heal the wounds of the past and move on.”
Saeran nodded, wondering if he had been too vague with his story. He didn’t want to go into detail with his shady past.
“After a bit of research, I drew this for you.” She lifted the flap. On the white paper they saw a black bird, so detailed Saeran could see the gloss of the feathers and the shine in its eye. It stood proudly with its back towards its audience, head turned to look at them.
“A raven,” Saeran stated the obvious.
“Yes. It represents spiritual rebirth, and this will suitably cover up that weird pseudo-tribal tattoo. If you don’t like it, I can make you something else.”
It also represents mystery, Saeran thought. The tattoo artist must know that he’s hiding something. Somehow, he felt he’s told her his life story.
“What do you think?” Vanderwood asked.
I was going to ask you that. But then again, no, he had to want it. It was his choice to want to start again in life, to remove what still hurt him.
The raven kept staring back, an inanimate object waiting for his approval to be brought along for life. Saeyoung would have preferred something less… dark. But Saeran was nothing like his brother, and he had finally accepted that.
Saeran smiled. “It’s perfect.”
“Awesome!” the artist exclaimed, and she pointed towards the leather chair in the corner of the room. “You can get seated. It’s a big one so it’s going to take a while.”
Saeran looked to Vanderwood. “If you want, you can go home so you won’t have to wait.”
Vanderwood scoffed. “I’ve waited longer for the best things in my life, what’s a few hours?”
If Saeran wasn’t in a public space right now, he’d hug the former agent and tell him nothing could be better than him.
He couldn’t stop admiring his new tattoo in the mirror. It was an exact replica of what his artist had sketched on paper. The only thing stopping him from touching the glossy feathers was the thick layer of cream and the plastic she had wrapped around his arm to keep it protected. Surrounding the raven were parts of a tree she used to cover the pointy bits of his old tattoo. It was as if Mint Eye had never touched his skin.
“You probably know all this, but just in case: keep it out of the sun and out of the water for at least a few months, wash it with special soap once a day and don’t scratch it no matter how itchy it gets. Here, a pamphlet with everything I said and more.” She handed him a piece of paper with instructions, which Saeran knew Vanderwood was going to making him follow those to a tee. “And most importantly, enjoy,” she finished.
Saeran thanked her as often as he could before they left, Vanderwood merely nodding while he opened the door to the empty, warm evening streets. It hit the redhead that he had been so enamored with his new tattoo that he hadn’t heard his boyfriend utter a word.
“What do you think?” he asked, trying not to sound worried about the fact that perhaps the taller man didn’t like it at all.
He wasn’t prepared for Vanderwood to crack the biggest smile, nor the kiss that made him topple backwards. Vanderwood held him steady, inadvertently intensifying the kiss, sending Saeran reeling. “It’s fantastic,” Vanderwood said as they parted. “And you look fantastic with it. I have never been more proud of you.”
Saeran allowed himself to hug the taller man tightly, not caring for those passing by, having no words to show his happiness. Vanderwood trying to maneuver to hug him back without touching the tender skin made him laugh.
Soon they would be home and undoubtedly he’d hear what the rest of his family thinks of his tattoo. He wanted to try wearing shirts instead of sweaters in the summer. He wanted to know what it was like to be proud of himself alongside the people he loved, who tell him he should be.
