#vent thoughts

[longing4yesterday]

can someone like. pass me a hug or something through the internet? i really need one right now :(

[idontreadtherules]

TW(?): themes of self destruction, chronic pain and venting

Ykw, the thing about pain is it doesn’t just “get better.” Fuck no. It moves in, sets up shop, settles into every nerve, every thought until its not just a feeling anymore, it’s the background noise of ur life.

Ive gotten to a point where happiness feels like a trap because the minute I think maybe, just maybe, something good might last I feel that sting of foreboding.

And you know what? self-destruction doesn’t look so irrational anymore. The pain never stops, and I feel like theres this sick kind of relief in tearing things down yourself. like beating the world to the punch. You think ah maybe if you can just ruin things on your own terms, you’ll take back some control. But that’s a lie too isnt it. The pain’s smarter than that cuz its already two steps ahead, feeding on every ounce of anger, every moment you try to fight it. It wants you broken.

And I’m tired. Tired of the weight, tired of pretending that tomorrows going to be different. The world keeps throwing “hope” at me, like Im supposed to reach for it, but all I see is a shiny package with nothing inside. The pain is so fucking real, the rest of it happiness, peace that’s the lie. And maybe I’m okay with that. Maybe, if destruction is all Ive got left, at least its mine.

[lord-harley-beloved]

Today we are running on 2 and 1/2 hours of sleep, derealization, an iron supplement, and the vague spirit of my 12 year old self wishing to be a “cool person”.

Wish us luck

[angryandereleon]

Oh to carve out this heart of mine,

Just so I can give it to you.

Would you be happy? Scared?

Maybe you could take better care of it,

Better than I ever have anyway.

You could hold my life in your hands..

I wonder what you'd do with it.

Cherish it? Or crush it?

Either way, I'd be happy

To have just been held by you.

[euesworld]

"You can vent to me, I truly don't mind.. I will always listen to what you have to say, your problems included. If you ever need someone to talk to or just listen, I'm right here ok??"

Don't hesitate to talk when you are feeling happy or sad or angry, or whatever.. I care - eUë

[rylth]

niby już wszystko przepadło, lecz wciąż czekam i nie śpię po nocach z nadzieją na trzy wyrazową wiadomość od ciebie

[wrath-whore]

let me die <3