Yesterday, I asked Lucifer if he knew me before I reached out to him. I had been curious about that for a while. He said that he did. He also said it was hard watching me, because he could see my wild spirit and he hated to see how they (people in my life) broke it.
I asked if he already knew that I was going to be his one day and he confirmed that he did, in some way, know. So I asked him if he ever watches other people with 'wild spirits' being broken and oppressed that he knows will not end up freeing themselves from this. He said that he does and immediately followed it up with "you do too, don't you?" He knows me too well.
I asked how he dealt with it. It's so hard to see people with so much potential being kept small and doing nothing about it. He just said "I can't control it." I ask him "but don't you wish? Don't you just wish things were different sometimes?" And Lucifer said, "no. I don't spend a lot of time wishing. I hope. And I am very patient. But I know what things I will or won't control. People's will isn't one of them. They have to choose freedom consciously."
I told him it's hard for me to accept that and asked him how I can just do nothing and 'hope' for someone to wake up and realize they have been lied to. I'm not that patient, and I also don't know who will have a change of heart in the future like he knows. How can I just sit there and do nothing??
Suddenly, I smell Verrier's candle. She shows up boldly and tells me, "that is not your job. It's not your job to try and save other bitches. You are here because you worked for it and you chose to. So stop worrying about other women who aren't free because they chose not to be. Stop wishing. It's not your place to do that. You focus on yourself."
And, yeah, she's probably right. I suppose Lucifer would've told me something similar, but Verrier got the point across just right. She was extremely upfront about it, which was probably how I needed to hear it.
Anyways, thank you, Lucifer, for being patient and waiting for me. And thank you, Verrier, for reminding me of how I got here.
