#weird customers

[stp-minimum-wage-contrarian]

ask and you shall receive! *ruffles your head feathers*

*They giggle, a purr quickly rising in their throat.*

[goofeyflowers]

Today I had a delivery where the guy’s card declined so he said he was going to pay cash. My boss gave me change for 50$. Turns out he had 50$ in change. When I got there he asked if I wanted to get out and help him count it on the tailgate of his truck so it would go faster. I said sure. (He tipped me $18.24 so I would think it was worth it.) I couldn’t even be mad though because it was the most hilarious experience I’ve ever had with a customer

[barista-problems-101]

Crazy drinks I’ve had customers order:

A Trenta Vanilla Sweet Cream Cold Brew...with 4 shots of espresso!! (For context, a Trenta is 30oz, Cold Brew is already our most caffeinated coffee. And the 4 shots, well a Venti Iced Latte typically comes with 3). Theres already about 320+mg of caffeine in that cold brew, plus 4 shots is about 300mg more so she is having 600mg + caffeine in one drink.

Also in the heavily caffeinated drink category we have a regular who gets a Grande Iced Carmel Macchiato with anywhere between 5 and 7 shots. It normally comes with 2. Sometimes she gets multiple a day.

There’s the guy who gets a Trenta Black Tea with 7 pumps of Peppermint and a shot of espresso.

Anyone who gets a drink at 180 degrees and drinks it right away, like, how do you not burn your mouth off and why are you getting that in the middle of Summer?

Also people who order layered Frappachinos with no Whip Cream, you’re missing pretty much the whole point. The only difference between the Mocha Cookie Crumble and the Java Chip, is the extra Whip Cream and the crushed Oreos, so If you wanna order a Mocha Cookie Crumble with no whip, just save the Like 50 cents and order a Java Chip.

[queenofthetired]

A customer came into my work and we got talking. She said if you ever deal with a rude customer, say “focus on having a nice day”. The lady was super friendly and kindly points out a mistake of mine during this convo. She explained how the focus was a hidden way to tell rude customers off.

F **k

Off

Customers

U

Suck

= focus

[namztlih]

Please like, reblog, and follow!

[fuck-customers]

It's been a few years since this happened, and I am gladly no longer in retail customer service, but I want to share the stories of the two weirdest regular customers at my grocery store job for posterity.

I started as a cashier at the Texas regional branch of a much larger chain grocery store. There were These Two Guys who would come in pretty regularly and were just the worst. They appeared to be a father and son, they looked alike and one was way older anyway, and there was something kind of unsettling about them. They both had those super thick coke-bottle glasses where you can't quite see where they're looking, but by itself that wouldn't be a big deal. They also had a strange way of talking and just acted kind of off. Normally I give people the benefit of the doubt, like I don't know their lives, but they had such annoying demands that any time they showed up (always at like 9PM or later) they would always hold up the line for like 10 minutes or more. Firstly, they insisted on loading every item out of their cart and onto the belt before you start ringing anything up. If you start before everything's up there, they would throw an absolute fit. Then everything must be rung up very slowly or they would say it was too fast to read the price, even though the price stays right on the screen. Then the bagging... ugh. Everything had to be bagged in paper bags with plastic bags on the outside. Plastic-in-paper doesn't bother me, since condensation can make the paper bags rip, but paper in plastic? Maybe this isnt true everywhere, but our paper bags were much bigger than the plastic ones, so it was literally impossible to put the paper ones in the plastic ones without the plastic ripping. And of course, if the plastic ripped, they would yell at you for that too. I always dreaded when Those Two Guys would show up to my register.

Luckily, I got promoted to the cash office/customer service desk after just a few months as a cashier, but there i met another very annoying regular, the Milk Lady. I never actually saw the milk lady, she would just call the store every couple days, and ask that we put aside 4-6 gallons of 1% store brand milk for her son or husband to pick up. The issues were twofold-- firstly, she wanted milk out aside for pickup late at night, namely after anyone with access to the dairy fridge or anyone who would know about her call would have left, so we would set it aside and then no one would be able to find it. Secondly, she would NOT stop talking! She was always very nice and polite and complimentary on the phone, so like, could be worse, but she would literally ramble for hours if I didn't cut her off and hang up eventually, which I was technically not allowed to do. If she called during the day I could tell her I had to help another customer, but if it was the end of the day while I was doing my cash office work, I would usually just hold the phone and do my work with the occasional "uh huh" until it was time to go home and then make some excuse. I didn't want to hate her because I'm pretty sure she was house-bound and lonely, but she made it really hard to get work done, so I definitely tried to forward her calls to the grocery manager whenever I could.

So after I've been in the new job for like a year, one time toward the end of my shift I'm called up to the register from the cash office, and have a mental "oh no" when I see the two guys with the coke-bottle glasses come up to my lane, because I know I won't be able to get back to my own job with enough time to close on time. But then, holy shit, what do I notice in their cart but 6 gallons of 1% store brand milk! Those Two Guys were the husband and son of the Milk Lady the whole time! The weirdness checked out, but I always wondered how someone as nice as The Milk Lady would wind up with family as mean as Those Two Guys. The world may never know.

[sarcasmandfoxes]

Weird interaction with customer

*customer leaving the shop*

Customer: cheers

Me: thank you!

Customer: what?

Me: I just said thank you ^^

Customer: no I'll be coming back

Me: ???¿¿¿??¿¿¿???

[shriekingpotatos]

Artists

I literally have no idea what it is about the last 20 minutes of my shift attracting weirdos but it always seems to happen this way.

Today, during the last 20 minutes of my shift, a guy walks up with some food items to buy and places them on the counter. He seems normal enough, a little greasy but nothing out of the ordinary. I scan his items, ask if there's anything else I can get him, to which he declines, and then asks if I can charge his items to his room. Sure, no problem. I print out the little piece of paper that asks for his information (room number, name, etc) and ask him to fill it out. Easy Peasy Lemon Squeezy.

Normally, while people are filling out this slip, I go and gather whatever items they may need or, in this case, started a latte for the gentleman who was there before him. I like to kill two birds with one stone and the espresso machines and the register are close enough together that if they have any questions, I'm literally two steps away. He then asks "I want to tip you, how can I do that?"

Me: oh, thank you! There's a little line on the paper that has a spot if you would like to add a tip. Guy: Ok...how do you know what room I'm in? Me: I'm sorry? Guy: to charge it to the room? How do you know what room I'm in? Me: Oh, there's a line for that on the little piece of paper I gave you to fill out. It's the one on the bottom. Guy: ok. How do I tip you?

At this point I walk over and go to put the information in the system without having him fill out the paper by just asking him. It saves both of us (mostly me) a headache.

Me: Don't worry about it, I'll just ask you and you can tell me the information ok? Guy: yeah sorry, I'm an artist and I just don't understand how any of this works. Me: uhhh sure. ok. What room number are you in? Guy: Oh I'm not staying here. I have a room at a hotel but it's super far away. *** I can clearly see a room key to our hotel in his hand. Now, the property I work at is technically two different hotels joined by a little walkway but it's the same property so regardless of which hotel you're staying at, I can still do a room charge *** Me: oh that's fine, I can still do a room charge if you're staying at *other hotel* even though we are technically at *my hotel*. It's weird but it's the same system because it's the same property. Guy: Oh i'm not staying there. Me: So you're not staying at either the *other hotel* or *my hotel*. Guy: Maybe mentally but not like...physically. me: um... ok. so uh... do you want to hand me that little key you're holding? Guy: what key??? my debit card??? Me: no...the...the key... that's in your hand. the room key. Guy: that's my debit card. (it most definitely was NOT a debit card) Here you go *hands me his ACTUAL debit card...under his room key* Me: Uh, ok we are gonna put it on here instead of a room charge ok? Guy: ok yeah sorry I'm a filmmaker so I don't understand any of this. I don't even know why I'm here in this town to be honest. Some people are paying me to be here??? I just wanted to try a new film technique. How did I even get here??? This town is so weird. Like I always thought *I* was the weird one but I'm not. It's this town that's weird and I'm the normal one. Like no one around here is like "Hey let's go get a beer!" Everyone you talk to is like gonna stab you or something. Me: *not sure what to say* ha ha yeah, sometimes people can be a little stand offish Guy: OH MY GOD ARE PEOPLE I TALK TO GOING TO STAB ME? IS THAT WHAT THEY'RE LIKE HERE??? Me: no sir. no one is going to stab you

At this point, my coworker comes over, only hearing bits and pieces of the conversation (the filmmaking part and the town being weird part) and STARTS TO TRY TO HAVE A CONVERSATION WITH THIS GUY WHO IS CLEARLY NOT ALL THERE.

Coworker: yeah it's such a weird town! You're into film??? Have you ever seen Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas??? It's one of my favorites. Me: COWORKER. DON'T YOU HAVE SIDEWORK YOU NEED TO GET DONE??? *under breath* please stop talking to him I'm trying to make him go away

Then at this point the guy starts going on about this movie and I have a line forming.

I try to get him to go away by asking what can I get for the next person and he just stands off to the side a little, staring at me. I try to ignore it but all of my "I need security to walk me to my car today" vibes are going off.

Then, the guy comes BACK UP TO ME, with his stuff that he bought in his hand and goes "I just realized that I have stuff in my hands that I don't give a shit about and some person just came up to me and asked me about Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas and that was one of the first VERY BIG LET DOWNS OF MY LIFE. He then ranted, aggressively, about how big of a let down this movie was and then threw his stuff in the trash and left.

It was a wild ride from start to finish.